His_Own

May our Father have mercy on the little ones, their mothers, and on us, His body and His bride. May He grant us wisdom to know how we might be salt in this world.

But, there is also a maturing process to consider. Just because he expected something from the Savior is not by itself a deciding factor. I once heard: "It is not how far along you are on your journey, but which direction you are facing." Although we can get clues from words and actions, only our Father knows whether their heart is turned toward Him or away from Him. As far as others are concerned, we must trust Him, for He loves them far more than we are able. As for our own standing, this has been a comfort to me: 1 John 5:13 These things have I written unto you that believe on the name of the Son of God; that ye may know that ye have eternal life, and that ye may believe on the name of the Son of God.

Praise Him for His mighty arm of protection!! I am not attempting to discourage you from doing whatever our Father is telling you to do. I do however believe we should be obedient with as much knowledge as may be available to us. In that spirit, I am sharing that it is not unusual for a "feeling" of injury to be delayed by several (even 5+) days. May He continue to sustain you!

HOOORAY Zoe-Girl!!!! Victory is so sweet! During a disagreement, someone may state that I am xxxxx, and I know that never even occurred to me, entered my thoughts or my heart. It used to hurt, and I felt misunderstood, or I'd get angry and attempt to defend myself. Then the Father showed me that what they were accusing me of was exactly what was in their own hearts! Now, I can hardly keep from laughing 'cause His enemy is telling me out of their own mouth what he is up to - no discernment needed!! I can't tell you how many times I could not figure out what was going on and then they started the accusations - what a relief! I knew how to pray!! (if I just keep from laughing long enough to make a graceful exit - as laughing is not typically considered an appropriate response to angry accusations, - could tend to intensify the situation. Although, maybe I should try it someday -- no, no, think that is a bad idea.) Oh my, Patricia, you had the right idea, time to sign off! I love this place!! - Thanks all!

I agree, that friendships with the opposite sex might be an interesting topic, and some of the best prayer partners I have ever had have been amazing people of God of the opposite sex. God has used my relationships with these people to heal and encourage me in ways that He alone fully knows and understands. But, I know others for whom this has been a downfall. It is SOOO important that we listen to Him, and not our own deceitful hearts. As for abandonment, no, I do not always believe it is physical. When I study the Hebrew meanings of words, the word widow <0490> means one who is in a desolate place, it is taken from <488> which means bereaved, discarded or forsaken (as in divorced). The Law is MUCH more lenient and caring than most of us perceive, for we do not take the time to study the original meanings of the words. As I mentioned in previous posts, I think a key to this situation may be his idleness, his choice to not provide even the most basic necessities for her. That is, to me, a very serious issue. But, the bottom line, is you must study these things for yourself, and come to your own conclusions. And, yes I understand it is helpful to have input, but do continue to remember that ultimately, we stand on our own before Him. Remeber, the foundation of this Love is built upon His Truth: He HATES divorce and promiscuity. Our life is not to be a quest to see how close we can get to the edge of the cliff before we fall off! But, if He calls us to the edge, we are not to fear, He is also able to keep us safe. May we each walk in His footsteps.

Check out the links in LadyC's signature!

In Matthew 18:15-17 it describes an NT cutting off process: Matthew 18:15 "Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. 16 But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established. 17 And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church: but if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as an heathen man and a publican." If you have not already, you may want to consider writing a contract which describes acceptable behavior that is mutually agreeable, with consequences. I have found in less severe situations that having a written guideline they helped to create and to which they agreed can help bring some reality into the situation. It could be a "witness" that Matt 18:16 requires. Since he helped create the document, he can't honestly blatantly reject or dismiss it (as 'prejudiced', or that 'they don't understand' or some other such thing which he could use to dismiss and disregard a human witness). It can help point out that they are the ones not abiding by the agreement. That does not mean it stops, but it can bring in a shred of truth into a very dark place. And yes, the agreements should have conditions - if you xxxxx (call screaming after 11PM) then xxxx - (we will not answer your calls for a week/month/whatever.) You and your family are in my prayers.

This discussion is also very dear to my heart, for I have loved ones I hope to see in heaven, but right now there seems to be no evidence that they will be there. (I have been comforted by BF, LadyC, Burn, and Bib, among others. Thank you.) Although I would love to a have rock solid answer to the issue, I have come to believe it is a bit like the law of gravity and the law of aero dynamics. They seem contradictory at first - one says you jump off a high cliff and you can die, the other says you jump off a high cliff and you can fly. But, there is a point at which both are true: If you jump off a cliff without a hang glider you can die; If you jump off a cliff with a hang glider you can fly.) I personally believe both are true, for our Father does not lie or mislead. But, we are finite, and do not understand xxxx (like the hang glider) that makes them both come together in agreement. He is Father, at times we just need to be His little ones and run into His faithful arms and trust that He loves others as much as He loves us -- for that is always the Truth. I also believe that as we grow, we go through stages similar to natural growth stages. There is a time ("terrible twos" for one) where rules should be taught and enforced - don't run into the street, don't touch the stove,.... As we grow, we understand the loving principles behind the rules, and we learn that we can ride our bikes single file on the street, or touch the stove whtn it is not hot. Some need to know that He loves them enough to put up boundaries, while others need to know that He loves them even when they cross the boundaries. (that is me!!) The bottom line: it really is about Love and not Law; relationship and not rules. I was raised believing I could loose my salvation, and for 7 years after accepting Him into my heart, I lived in fear that I would do something that would keep me from Him. I was not free to live life fully, freely, abundantly, until I knew that He loved me no matter what. He is the One Who saved me, and He alone could keep me. I trusted Him for my salvation, I needed to trust Him for my preservation. My life changed dramatically after that. So, it is the following thoughts and verses that I cling to: The Creator is all knowing - He knew all your potential sins before you were born, and sent His Son to die for you anyway. If He loved us that much when He knew ALL of our sins before He died, and loved us that much when we were His enemies, what could we possibly do to make Him abandon us after we have turned to Him? Once we have asked His Son to live in us and through us, it is not we who live, but His Son Who lives in us - He will not reject His Own. Romans 8:34

I began my adult life believing that divorce was never, ever G-d's best; that He will turn all situations to our good, if we just hang in there. He will turn all things to our good, but it is not always because we hang in there, but because we listen to His voice. This is not about pride because we can do it, when others can't. It also has NOTHING to do with happiness. It is about being His servant, understanding that we gave our lives, each breath of it, to HIM! So the road I take is HIS decision, not mine! There are women who have 'hung in there' for years, and the Father gloriously saved their husbands, it was worth the wait. I have also known women who married for lust, but the Father remade him to be the man of their dreams. So I am not sure I can agree that this fact alone means it is not of Him. But, G-d divorced Israel, not because He wasn't happy, not because He couldn't hang in there, not because He couldn't wait for the transformation, not because He was settling for second best. He is the Almighty; He does not do second best. His nature is LOVE, so if the most loving thing He could do for His wife was to divorce her, than I needed to look VERY closely at what that means. I am concerned about his laziness on many levels. This shows how the early church approached it. The issue here is 'should young widows remain widows and be cared for by the church': In I Tim. 5:11-15 - 11

Are you sure it was Alabama? Obama carried that state and won by about 15 percentage points. Why would he want to replace the delegates? Pretty sure it was Alabama - It was a state in the South that he won. That is part of what was so striking about it - if that is how he is treating his friends, what will he do with those who are not? BUT - I would like to see the video again, so MANY things get twisted. OR, even better, is there someone close to the Democratic Party in Southern states that he won (especially Alabama) that could check this out?

Thank you. May you be abundantly blessed.

Some of the things the Father asked me under when I was going through hard times: 1. What is a marriage? Is it just the absence of adultery? If not that, what is it? 2. Is it leaving and cleaving? If so, what do these mean? 3. Moses allowed divorce for hardness of heart. What does that look like in a marriage? 4. Is marriage a contract which can be broken by one party? or is it an unbreakable covenant? 5. Is our Father perfect? Under what circumstances did He divorce Israel? Study His relationship with Israel. Based on the answers to these questions, and how they relate to the marriage, He made it clear to me that He was a G-d of Truth, and I should act accordingly. Also potentially applicable: 1 Timothy 5:8

Hi! Some of the things I see: 1. That you are so upset is an issue. For me, that almost always means that something is wrong. a. That it is touching on an area that the Father is dealing with me; I need to stay on the "Potter's wheel" and not jump off. If this is the case, I may speak with the other person, but it is often not wise, (at least not yet) as I am the one with the issue, not them, and I risk doing harm. It is the hurting that are usually the most hurtful. No point in making it worse. b. Check your health and schedule - are you streched too thin? Have you been watching things you should be watching (like taking meds, vitamins - especially the B complex, sleeping enough, etc.) c. That something is wrong in the situation and the foundation of the issue that should be addressed. 2. Although not raised in a controlling church, many that I have worshipped with in my adult life have become controlling using the "authority", "shepherding", or some other philosophy to justify it. From this I have learned: a. That we stand responsible for the decisions we make, even when it is at our pastor's prompting (or insistance). He may also stand before the Father for his part, but we pay with the direct consequences in our own lives. The worst mistakes I have made in my life have consistently been because pastor's have "proven" through the Bible that I was misinterpreting what the Father was saying to me. As I grew, I learned that they were the ones who were not properly understanding the passages which they used. I have paid HEAVILY for this fear of man rather than fear of the Almighty. I did not understand it to be fear of man at the time, I thought it was obedience. I was wrong. b. I have seen some unreal things done in the name of the church, and have sat under pastors who use obvious, identifiable control, using public praise and humiliation as their tools to keep the "faithful" faithful. In one church, it started as a warm and welcome phone call each time I missed a service. I soon learned we were expected to report to the pastor or someone close to him each time we would be unable to attend. I love that church and that pastor still, and learned an enormous amount from them, but, there were Definitely control issues hidden beneath the surface. If you are uncomfortable, this may be what you are facing. He died that we might be free, not be put into bondage. (Although we can choose to be willing bond-servants - it is to be OUR choice!) If you feel it falls in this category, there are 2 basic choices: i) say nothing and take it to the Father. I was in one controlling church which only allowed this response. There were Christians there whose spirits were so powerful that it was a blessing just sitting beside them, saying nothing. They could minister peace, love, joy, faith and healing without words or physical touch. I had never experienced such awesome spiritual intensity. I have heard some call it "Quakers Communion". It is similar to soaking, or threshing floor, but it is a quietness before the King in which they had a part. It is precious and worth learning. Perhaps He is giving you an opportunity to learn something very precious. ii) for the most part, I believe in going with Matthew 18:15

So many excellent replies. There is a site that I think is very insightful: http://theophilus.org/divorce.html Moses, under the law, allowed divorce for hardness of heart - and there is much hardness of heart in the world these days. Although remarriage is allowed, be careful, as it may not be best. I have read of studies that show the children fare better without remarriage than with. Of course, there are many factors. Following the leading of our Father is always best. It is not easy or fun to have "one flesh" ripped apart. My heart goes out to the family. They will be in my prayers. Sal

Proud to be an old timer right now I agree! It is okay to cheat as long as you don't get caught (with a "love"/lust child!)!? ! May God have mercy on us for allowing these men to become our leaders.

Hi, I was browsing around youtube and found an interesting video of a Democratic Party meeting in (Alabama I think). It starts by stating that after the Primary (which actually elects the people who will go to the National Convention promising to support a specific candidate) Obama's campaign came with their list of people they wanted to go to the National Convention to support him - replacing those elected by the people of the state who were to support him!!!! Someone had taken a video of the actual meeting showing many speakers in a large room stating their objections to the decision made by the Party. I only saw it once. If this is accurate, to me this is a most revealing action! I cannot find it again, and was wondering if anyone else had seen it or knew its url. If so, I would greatly appreciate it if you could send it to me. I would like to look at it more closely. It may be a very important issue to research/address in this campaign. (my thought: "You can find anything on the internet one time!!! -- Good luck trying to find it the second time!!!) Thanks. Sal

I believe it depends on our own spiritual development. Just as in natural development, we must first learn the letter of the law/command - "Don't touch the stove, or don't go into the street" to avoid being burnt or killed, as we do not yet fully comprehend the purpose of the stove and when it is hot and when it is not, or when the street is "safe". Later, as we understand, we are able to not only touch the stove, but use it to nourish others; we not only go in the street, but ride and drive on it - because we understand the principles behind the original command "Don't touch the stove". The letter is the foundation, and is primarily for our protection, the spirit comes with maturity and is much more complex; but does not exist without the foundation of the letter. Sal

Hello, I agree that this is about honoring the One Who has given us all. And it is not precisely about the tithe, as it is typically taught. 2 Chronicles 31:5

Charlesj, I once also believed that. It had been based on 1 Corinthians 13:8

"Hi, I need to digest this a little more before I respond. It sounds like what is happening. " I'm not certain that post was meant for you to digest! It condensed decades of experience into one page! The point is that it is not regular or predictable; it does not happen every day, every month, or even every year; that there is not a formula that we can recognize, each time is unique; that it is not something we can do on our own; but that this is His gift, His timing, His discretion. But, I did want to give you some details, for generalities alone can be very hard to put our finite minds around. I am glad you are my sister. I am looking forward to knowing you better in His kingdom. Sal

Yes, that would be confirmation, not only that you are to pray for him, but I would also consider it confirmation that you are being called to be a burden bearer.

Angelique, Yes, it sounds as if you may be called to bear burdens. You may also be being groomed as a prophet; prophets are often first burden bearers. Burden Bearing (sometimes called intercession) can have a variety of "intensities". We are all called to be bear one another's burdens. Sometimes it means we pray whenever the Father brings someone to mind. Other times there is an urgency to the thought that requires that we drop whatever we are doing (even if we are in the middle of a challenging hour-long final test at college: and He desires that we spend 20 minutes of that hour in prayer!!! - a pastor's life was being threatened at the time, and his life preserved, and the final came out great - as only He could arrange). Sometimes it is for hours, and we have no name, no situation, no idea why we are being called to pray - but we are constrained to kneel in earnest prayer before His throne for hours at a time (2 witches were freed from the enemy's camp that night into our Father's kingdom). Usually, at least in the beginning, our Father confirms that "our thoughts and feelings" were indeed His Spirit communicating with ours by having us talk with the ones for whom we were praying and confirming dates, times, and the situation, as He has done for you. Other times, it has been a heaviness, it looked like what the world would call a depression, when there is no reason in life, health or circumstances that would explain it, and again, no name, no situation, nothing... but later found an old friend who cried out during those same days to the Father, "Please, let Sal know, let her pray for me!!!" But those were of short duration, minutes, hours, days. Some are for months, even years. Sometimes, He forges a friendship with the one to whom we are "assigned" that lasts during the time of the burden. At times, that ssignment may even be with one whom we would not have a natural relationship, but His grace reigns. Sometimes, He calls us to take up the slack in their lives, babysit, tutor, do laundry, file court paperwork, whatever their pressing need might be.... on assignment from Him, so it is not 'charity' they will not 'owe you'. When they say "I couldn't ask you to do that" you remind them of the truth "You didn't, my Father did." Be very careful that this is the truth, that you are doing this in His leading and timing. It can be tempting to step into the place of the Savior, and instead of you leading them to Him, they are only seeing you, your compassion, your help and they become dependent on you (and you co-dependent, needing them to need you!) Other times, it really is taking the emotional or spiritual burden of another. One minute you might be praising the Savior as you walk through your house and the next minute you are struck to your knees wailing for grief of their departed spouse/child - for the Father took some of their anguish and put it on you, as it was more than they could bear alone. It may be as they are holding the dying one in their arms, all alone, with no one physically around to comfort them; it seems as though you are "going crazy" until you learn of the event, happening during the very time you were crying out. (It helps when we trust not only our lives, but our sanity to Him.) Our precious Father knew they could not bear it alone. They might never know how they got through that day, but our Father does. The most intense burden bearing I have heard of was the wife of the founder of the Church of God in Christ. She spent nearly every minute aside from essential survival functioning in prayer, intercession, and burden bearing for many years. So, burden bearing can be as sweet as praying when we think of someone, or as intense as having the pain literally knock you to your knees in anguish. It can be for seconds or for years. Just remember, He loves you as much as He loves those whom He has placed on your heart. He is a gentleman. He will not force you, but He will stretch you. It is an honor and a privilege to have Him call on us, to have Him trust us so much that He will share with us the depths of the trials of His 'called ones', His Body, His Bride, His Heart. May we be faithful to listen to His Spirit and obey. FYI - I had a friend once who was also a burden bearer, who was heart-broken when some mutual friends of ours divorced. She felt she had failed them, that she should have known that something was wrong. At least two things were a problem with that attitude: 1. Burden bearing is NOT about standing in the place of Savior for another. It is not our prayers that "save" or "rescue", it is His grace, His Power, His Mercy!!! It is what we do as His servants, we cannot "conjure" it up on our own. 2. We are NOT the Almighty!! We cannot carry the burdens of the world! He is wise, and not a tale-bearer! He will not tell us things that would be more than we could handle, that would harm us, our relationship with them, would compromise them... We are His servants. We are responsible to carry only those burdens HE has asked us to carry. We do not choose the ones we carry, He does, for He is wise, He is good, He is Love.