methinkshe Posted July 26, 2011 Group: Senior Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 32 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 679 Content Per Day: 0.11 Reputation: 14 Days Won: 1 Joined: 03/02/2007 Status: Offline Share Posted July 26, 2011 ............the school holidays which start today in approx 45 minutes - yes, I'm actually counting down the minutes. I only have one child at home who still attends school and she is profoundly mentally and physically disabled and consequently very demanding of my time and attention. I've been trying to justify this dread by convincing myself that it will mean less time for Bible study and getting to know the Lord, but I know this is just an excuse. How can getting to know ABOUT the Lord ever replace knowing Him in action in and through me? Especially towards my daughter. It's such a lame excuse. I know I need to change so that I will delight in the opportunity that school holidays present. I just can't see a way forward at the moment. If an opportunity presents to go to the beach, for instance, I have to withdraw because of wheelchair inaccessibility. So many things are inaccessible to us either because of her physical disability or her mental disability. I cannot afford to spend huge amounts of money on, say, paying to visit an aquarium when, after 5 miniutes, she has totally lost focus and thus interest. And I have had to pay not only for her short interest but also to accompany her! It's a very expensive 5 minutes of interest, to be honest. So we tend to be stuck at home trying to do artwork that she cannot really do, or cooking that is more a demonstration on my part than active involvement on hers, and so on and so forth. I am just not equipped....Lord help me! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tinky Posted July 26, 2011 Group: Diamond Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 200 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 1,602 Content Per Day: 0.30 Reputation: 291 Days Won: 8 Joined: 10/24/2009 Status: Offline Birthday: 01/01/1986 Share Posted July 26, 2011 Praying for u!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
methinkshe Posted July 26, 2011 Group: Senior Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 32 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 679 Content Per Day: 0.11 Reputation: 14 Days Won: 1 Joined: 03/02/2007 Status: Offline Author Share Posted July 26, 2011 Praying for u!!!!! Thanks, Tinky. 30 minutes and counting..... Please, Lord, work a miracle within my heart. I know you are in me and with me, I know you have the answer, but I'm just not seeing it right now. Please lift the scales from my eyes, dear Lord Jesus. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fez Posted July 26, 2011 Group: Royal Member Followers: 3 Topic Count: 683 Topics Per Day: 0.12 Content Count: 11,128 Content Per Day: 1.99 Reputation: 1,352 Days Won: 54 Joined: 02/03/2009 Status: Offline Birthday: 12/07/1952 Share Posted July 26, 2011 Have you got anyone who can give you a bit of breathing space every now and again. An hour or two to yourself? I had to do that with my Mom, because it was literally killing me from lack of sleep and running full time while trying to hold down a job that demands a lot of my time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
methinkshe Posted July 26, 2011 Group: Senior Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 32 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 679 Content Per Day: 0.11 Reputation: 14 Days Won: 1 Joined: 03/02/2007 Status: Offline Author Share Posted July 26, 2011 Have you got anyone who can give you a bit of breathing space every now and again. An hour or two to yourself? I had to do that with my Mom, because it was literally killing me from lack of sleep and running full time while trying to hold down a job that demands a lot of my time. I do get a quite a lot of help from my husband and outside-the-family respite care, but the over-all responsibility falls to me. It is my attitude that concerns me. I know I should not be dreading the holidays as presently I am. Apart from all else, she is such a blessing with her demonstrative love for others and an inner joy that keeps her smiling, whatever the circumstance. She is so lovely in her innocence. She is like a one year old in a sixteen year old body in her innocence. It really is just total selfishness on my part - I don't want to be so needed that I have to abandon my personal interests - even if my personal interest is learning more about Jesus through Bible study or reading sermons etc. I know that is not what love should be. I need my living Lord Jesus to break through my selfishness in a really big way so that I can truly love her with Jesus' love, not some wretched approximation. 10 minutes and counting..... Please, Lord, break through my selfish desires................ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
winsomebulldog Posted July 26, 2011 Group: Diamond Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 20 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 732 Content Per Day: 0.14 Reputation: 113 Days Won: 5 Joined: 03/26/2010 Status: Offline Birthday: 04/30/1971 Share Posted July 26, 2011 I love your honesty. Let's face it, so many of us would keep a problem like this to ourselves, not wanting to "look bad" by confessing that we aren't perfect. It's that humility that I know God will bless! I'll join you in praying for God to soften your heart in this matter, and to help you find great joy in the days ahead. God bless you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Littlelambseativy Posted July 26, 2011 Group: Royal Member Followers: 6 Topic Count: 230 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 4,941 Content Per Day: 0.95 Reputation: 2,003 Days Won: 14 Joined: 02/08/2010 Status: Offline Share Posted July 26, 2011 Do walks in a park or just down the street or a trip shopping help? I see families with children in wheelchairs at say Walmart or to the grocery store. i know the store may present a problem but walks would get you and her out of the house. You could point our clouds and birds and trees no need to pay to do that. It may be simplistic of me to try to suggest these but do they have a daycare type of place for you to be able to take her to? Even if it is only for 1 hr? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Isaiah 6:8 Posted July 26, 2011 Group: Royal Member Followers: 2 Topic Count: 426 Topics Per Day: 0.07 Content Count: 3,633 Content Per Day: 0.58 Reputation: 222 Days Won: 13 Joined: 03/23/2007 Status: Offline Birthday: 08/26/1978 Share Posted July 26, 2011 Praying Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
He giveth more grace Posted July 26, 2011 Group: Royal Member Followers: 2 Topic Count: 123 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 2,049 Content Per Day: 0.32 Reputation: 267 Days Won: 9 Joined: 10/22/2006 Status: Offline Share Posted July 26, 2011 ............the school holidays which start today in approx 45 minutes - yes, I'm actually counting down the minutes. I only have one child at home who still attends school and she is profoundly mentally and physically disabled and consequently very demanding of my time and attention. I've been trying to justify this dread by convincing myself that it will mean less time for Bible study and getting to know the Lord, but I know this is just an excuse. How can getting to know ABOUT the Lord ever replace knowing Him in action in and through me? Especially towards my daughter. It's such a lame excuse. I know I need to change so that I will delight in the opportunity that school holidays present. I just can't see a way forward at the moment. If an opportunity presents to go to the beach, for instance, I have to withdraw because of wheelchair inaccessibility. So many things are inaccessible to us either because of her physical disability or her mental disability. I cannot afford to spend huge amounts of money on, say, paying to visit an aquarium when, after 5 minutes, she has totally lost focus and thus interest. And I have had to pay not only for her short interest but also to accompany her! It's a very expensive 5 minutes of interest, to be honest. So we tend to be stuck at home trying to do artwork that she cannot really do, or cooking that is more a demonstration on my part than active involvement on hers, and so on and so forth. I am just not equipped....Lord help me! Not that you daughter is a valley, but we can't stay on the mount of revelations and glory all the time, it come a time that the Lord calls us to work in the valley - His Work! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
2Joyful Posted July 26, 2011 Group: Royal Member Followers: 4 Topic Count: 48 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 1,901 Content Per Day: 0.35 Reputation: 365 Days Won: 29 Joined: 08/16/2009 Status: Offline Share Posted July 26, 2011 Heavenly Father, Bring forth answers to my sister. Oder her steps and provide the necessary actions that will allow her and her daughter to enjoy the holiday thats approaching. In Jesus, Name, Amen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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