Whether to let daughter go on web site?

[carlos123]

Carlos any more updates

Hi Angel....sorry it has taken me so relatively long to get back to you but lots of things have been going on in my life and in the last week or two I have drawn back from being too involved in the forum.

Here's an update.....

My relationship with my daughter has gone pretty much downhill. She continues to be ungrateful for whatever I do for her and somewhat bellligerant and snippety. She continues to blame everyone and everything else in life for whatever happens to her as a result of things that she does (in other words not taking personal responsibility for anything).

I hate to say it Angel but am getting tired of her ways and frankly, at this point, don't much want to do anything with her. She is almost 17 and pretty much set in her ways I think. It seems like eveyr single time I get involved in her life I get burnt and I am tired of being bvrnt.

Not even the Lord keeps indefinitely initiating into our lives if we do not want Him as our Father.

I think at this point it's best to just let her be in the sense of my trying to get more invovled in her life.

The more I get involved the more I see needs and areas that need correction and the more the result is conflict with her.

As her mom's husband, and her stepfather, I still have responsibilities that I have to fulfill. I cannot just sit idly by and take her belligerance, snippety attitudes, tendency to leave things around the house, and other such things and let them just slide. So I will continue to come down on this type of stuff.

My wife is staying out of it in the sense of not wanting to get between me and our daughter and she is supporting me in whatever I think is best from the standpoint that she won't contradict any discipline I mete out. She will not listen to our daughter coming to complain about me or whatever form of discipline I hand out.

So I guess the short of it is, Angel, that me and our daughter are just co-existing at this point. I don't hold out much of any hope of having things be different.

She needs to get out on her own and come face to face with life. God needs to deal with her in the realm of eveyr day life apart from me. She is not very open to learning from me, interacting with me on a level which would make much of any real difference in her life, and is not open to trusting me as a Father figure in her life.

Sorry for the discouraging news but that's just the way things are and I am not sure that at this point in her life that there is much that I can do about it. Short of dropping everything and spending all kinds of money and all kinds of time doing what she wants to do. Go to movies, cater to every whim of her desires, and otherwise become a slave to her whims and fancies that is. And even if I did that, assuming I could, it would not deal with the core issues in her heart that she needs to face. A lack of trust in anybody but herself. Yes that is mainly due to her past, before I even came into the picture, but it's a lack of trust that will take a miracle of God Almightly to get past. A miracle that I do not have faith to believe for given that she has a free will and has shown no openess or desire to change. Not even God will violate her free will.

Thanks for asking Angel.

Carlos

[finding God (angel)]

You could not help her and just ignore her and if she wants to go somewhere act like you don't care.But hey i can't tell you what to do.

[finding God (angel)]

Carols I been praying for you.God will help you when it is time I know everything will work out for the best.I am glad you posted this.I hoped I helped some I not good at advice I don't think,but my friends think I give good advice they call me a lot to see what to do if they want or need something.Carlos I am praying for you and your family.i hope you daughter will learn to trust you sooner or later.