ALL OR NOTHING

[Guest fiverottendogs]

ALL OR NOTHING

My mind is full of images

Ones that I do not want to see

A place that goes beyond darkness

And how there I came to be

Affliction struck me hard

My life was full of pain

I thought I could handle things

But control I could not gain

God said give me your hurt and pain

I will heal you with my love

Keep your eyes of me

And your heavenly reward above

So I gave God all the junk

At least I thought I had

Still depression ruled my life

I always felt so sad

I knew God gave His promise

To rid me of pain and strife

So I dug my heels down hard

And I held on for dear life

God then revealed to me

Something I did not want to know

He said you can not fix this thing

You

[Guest His_Servant]

Very cool! Are you the author? If so, keep writing!

[Guest fiverottendogs]

Thank you so much. Yes I am the author.

I used to write and draw alot when I was in high school but no one ever said hey you have potential so I gave it up. It was only until this summer when I went to a Christian counselor for depression that he told me to take up writing again. After 22 years of not writing I can tell you I was nervous. I have written alot of stuff over the past few months and don't intend to stop now. I am thinking about writing something called "Beauty from the ashes" It will be a short story about my battle with depression that will incorporate my poetry into the story.

[Guest His_Servant]

I think that sounds awesome!! I'm glad the counselor suggested you take up writing again, especially after hearing about how you once done so much of it. You are gifted as a writer. That isn't something that can be learned, but is something a person is born with. God gave you that gift so that you could use it for his glory. Keep it up!

I done quite a bit of writing in high school also...mostly poetry. I have always loved drawing too, but writing was always my main passion. It was the only thing I really cared about in school. I wrote every single day, and looked foward to getting to Writing class to see what assignment I could begin working on. When the end of my senior year came around, the only thing I cared about was scoring high on my writing portfolio. I was a nervous wreck LOL! I think I obsessed about it too much, though, because I remember crying over a piece I feared would cause my grade to fall. I told my writing teacher I would ONLY be satisfied with the highest grade. The grades from highest to lowest were...Distinguished, Proficient, Apprentice, Novice.

Anyway, after high school, I continued to write for a while. I had this big dream of publishing a book of poetry called "Autumn Rain". After about a year, however, it seems like it just completely left me! After having been someone who wrote something every single day for so many years, I was unable to find any words at all.....NOTHING came to mind. Now, I'm beginning to be able to write again somewhat....only a couple of poems so far and a couple of songs the Lord gave me, but thats better than before. Perhaps God arranged it to be this way for a reason...I dunno. Before I came to Christ, my poetry was filled with pain and sadness. When I was saved, my mind went blank...which is odd, I know. I pray he will bless me to be able to write for him somehow, though. I would love to write as I once was able to.

Again, keep it up! God gave you that gift, and he brought it back to your attention for a reason. Perhaps God intends to heal you through your writing. Besides that, others could be led to him through those words. God Bless You!

[Guest fiverottendogs]

You sound alot like me only younger And what a funny coincidence that we both have the same verse in our signature only a different version GREAT MINDS THINK ALIKE!!

I mean I don't take any of the glory for my talent because it is only by God I can do it. BUT to know that I am not the only one that thinks God has given me a talent and for someone to acknowledge that humbles me that God thought I was special enough to give such a powerful talent to. I do want to use my talent for God's glory. I want to touch people with my words and open their hearts to things that God wants them to see. I want them to feel what I am writing not just read it. Words are a powerful thing.

I think that you are right. There is a reason you are not writing now. Only God knows why. I think God is going to use my writing in a big way to witness to people and Satan tried to take that from me because he knew that God was going to use it.

I know what you mean about pain and sadness in your writing. I wrote out of pain and sadness when I first started back this summer. I wrote about suicidal thoughts, depression, anxiety, rejection, etc and it was good to get this out. I even think God can use the pain I wrote about. But as I have moved along God is now refining my skills in another way for His glory. Don't worry about it. He is going to renew your mind and you will be better than ever and you won't be able to write fast enough for all the thoughts in your head.

Yes I know God brought this back to my attention for a reason and you are probably right. There was alot of healing in those poems. Thank you so much and I want to encourage you to also write every day. Start a prayer journal or something. Before long you will be back to the pen and paper.

[Guest His_Servant]

I noticed the signature thing too. Thats cool! You are certainly right that God can use the pain as well. There was a time when I wondered if it was okay for me to hang onto all the poems I have written that are filled with pain, but then God brought it to my attention that those writings go perfectly along with my testimony. They're reminders of where God has brought me from, and through them, others could see that as well. For now they are all in folders in the top of my closet, but I believe one day they will be used to glorify God in some way....and thats what I want.

It most certainly is true that God gave you that gift, though. I read in a book once, that God creates each of us so uniquely, no two people are exactly alike. No one else on earth is like you. He created you (all of us) uniquely, giving you certain gifts and so forth, so that you can live out the purposes he has for your life. Also, since no one else on earth is quite like you, no one else can do the job he created you for. Some may have the same gifts you do, but no one else can do the job he uniquely created you for. If you don't do your job, you will miss out and someone else who would have benefited from your gifts, will miss out also.

Anyway, I thought that was cool! I really believe that is true, too. I mean, God knew each and every one of us before the foundations of the world! I believe there are certain duties/jobs we all have as christians, but I also believe we each have our own ministry in Christ. Writing is included in your's, so keep workin! Theres a blessing in it for you, and someone else....and God will be glorified!

God Bless!

[Guest fiverottendogs]

Oh yes I agree with you. God has given us all special jobs to do here and we are responsible for them. I know that God is going to use my writing to touch and move people. I gave all of my poetry works to the leader of our youth praise band at church because I respect him and wanted him to give me some constructive thoughts on my writing. He loved them and is using several of them to write songs from. These songs in turn may touch some young person and turn them in the right direction. It's awesome how God works!!

I also know that God is leading me to start my own business. God birthed this in my husband back about 5 years ago to open a club/hang out/snack bar whatever you want to call it for young people. Where they could go after school or whenever and hang out, play video games or pool and eat all without the pressures of having people around smoking, drinking or doing drugs. On the weekends we can have bands come in and play and have open mic night for new talent and even have like a disco night or something. It never really came to pass then but I told my husband that God would bring it back in the future when it was His timing. God has just recently brought this vision back to me and my daughter now confirming it was the thing I needed to know that God was really speaking this to me. She asked me one night after church "what happened to the dream you and Tommie once had about the club"? and I told her that I felt God had been speaking to me about it but was unsure. I feel now I must move on with this and begin plans to start this business. I admit I am scared since my husband is no longer here for my support. He was my best friend and a strong tower in my life. Maybe God will use me starting this business on my own to let me know that I "can do all thing through Him". I mean I believe I can do it with God's help but it's just scary being on your own you know? Anyway I have the building I feel God is showing me and I am fixing to go on with plans to try to get things going. Please pray for me about this because I feel it will not only be a way to make a living for myself, but also my daughter can work for me and have a more flexible schedule for her ministries that she is in and the young people in our community can have a safe, clean Christian environment to go to.

[Guest His_Servant]

Oh yes I agree with you.  God has given us all special jobs to do here and we are responsible for them.  I know that God is going to use my writing to touch and move people. I gave all of my poetry works to the leader of our youth praise band at church because I respect him and wanted him to give me some constructive thoughts on my writing.  He loved them and is using several of them to write songs from.  These songs in turn may touch some young person and turn them in the right direction.    It's awesome how God works!! 

I also know that God is leading me to start my own business.  God birthed this in my husband back about 5 years ago to open a club/hang out/snack bar whatever you want to call it for young people.  Where they could go after school or whenever and hang out, play video games or pool and eat all without the pressures of having people around smoking, drinking or doing drugs.  On the weekends we can have bands come in and play and have open mic night for new talent and even have like a disco night or something.  It never really came to pass then but I told my husband that God would bring it back in the future when it was His timing.  God has just recently brought this vision back to me and my daughter now confirming it was the thing I needed to know that God was really speaking this to me.  She asked me one night after church "what happened to the dream you and Tommie once had about the club"?  and I told her that I felt God had been speaking to me about it but was unsure.  I feel now I must move on with this and begin plans to start this business.  I admit I am scared since my husband is no longer here for my support.  He was my best friend and a strong tower in my life.  Maybe God will use me starting this business on my own to let me know that I "can do all thing through Him".  I mean I believe I can do it with God's help but it's just scary being on your own you know?  Anyway I have the building I feel God is showing me and I am fixing to go on with plans to try to get things going.  Please pray for me about this because I feel it will not only be a way to make a living for myself, but also my daughter can work for me and have a more flexible schedule for her ministries that she is in and the young people in our community can have a safe, clean Christian environment to go to.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

WOW, thats wild about the club/hangout...but awesome too!! LOL I say it's wild, because let me tell you about my dream!! It may be a bit too much, but I believe the Lord put it on my heart. I would love to open up a christian bookstore here in my area, but have it be much more that just a book store. My dream is also to have a place for the youth to hang out...not just them, but especially them. I would like to have a place where they could hang out and talk, watch tv, listen to music, eat snacks, read magazines and books, etc....and have soda, coffee, cappuccino, etc.

Okay, and here is where it may begin to sound like too much LOL.....I would like to also have a community outreach program...to help meet the needs of the people here in my community. With this, I would love to have the young people..and whoever wanted to helping out...getting things together, giving them to the people, visiting the elderly, ETC. OKAY, and even farther out there is this....I would like to be able to offer christian counselling to those in need also.

LOL...yeah, it's a bit much, isn't it!!?? Anywho, thats my big dream. I even have a name for the place.."The Potter's House". Perhaps someday it will become reality. You are right, all things are possible with Christ! I will be praying about the business you want to start in our Lord's service. I think it's awesome, and we definitely need more people reaching out to our youth today. They need better options for how to spend their time. If possible, let me know how it goes once you get started.

GOD BLESS!

[Guest fiverottendogs]

No way that is not too much. That is awesome!! More people need to have the openess to hear what God is telling them to do even if they feel like it is a huge thing that would never happen. If the Lord puts it in your heart then go for it.

The bookstore is a great idea but I am more excited about the outreach and Christian counseling part. there are so many hurting people out there and alot of them won't come to churches for help for many different reasons. We gotta be the ones that go out and reach them where they are.

No, no, no don't say that's a bit much. I think God has put a huge vision on you and you can do it with His help. I know you can I will also be praying about you going forward with this also. I am going to meet with my Pastor and a gentleman in our church that owns several businesses and see about how I need to get started in this.