Perfectionism

[Guest shorti]

Hi, I know I haven't been here for a while, but I need someone's help or advice. My mother seems to think I have a problem with neatness and perfection. I don't think so, I just like the feeling of achieving high-set goals for myself. I do put off handing in papers, and I am a big procrastinater. But that is because I want to do a good job. I redid a poster for spanish 9 times before I presented it, (2 weeks late), but that's just how I am. I like things to look nice. For instance when I vacuum, I like it for the lines in the carpet to be straight, no overlapping. I do sometimes if I can't sleep I will sometimes clean something, like mop the floor, vacuum or dust. It just seems to take my mind off things like school. My mother seems to think I have some fear of becoming a failure, which is somewhat true. I just want to impress her, she sets high standards for me,(like being a straight A student) so I can go to a nice college and have a nice future. And sometimes I feel like less than perfect is not acceptable. Anyway I saw a therapist for the first time on Saturday, and she thinks I may have something called Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder( OCPD) which focuses on perfection and so on. But I've been told you can't be diagnosed a personality disorder til you are 18. Anyway does anyone know anything about this? I have another appointment in about 3 weeks, what should I do? Do any of you think I have some problem or do I just like things to look nice?

[his]

wondering....To me it sounds perfectly fine..I am a perfectionist but I lean toward the procrastination side due to lack of energy and time..but when I do start on something..well, I get it right..or at least try a little too hard. The BIG question is... do you feel like you must clean or do you sincerely enjoy cleaning. If someone told you that you couldn't clean for a week would you be okay with that or would you go crazy? I mean, you could put your clothes in the drawers and put your plate in the dish washer type clean, but nothing that isn't absolutely necessary. Seriously, I think that plays a big role... is your cleaning a necessity, or a hobby? I think that it would be helpful to integrate other things in your schedule...dont JUST clean for fun or to get your mind off of things... do other things too...art, poems, study the bible..anything.. no one should be hung up on ONE THing only... let me know how the counseling appt goes. I pray all will be well. Love HIS

[Micah68]

Dear Shorti,

Being perfect sounds nice but you have to ask yourself why you want to be perfect. Most of us would like to be perfect because we are proud. But when you read the Scriptures, everything in them tells us that we all come short of His glory. They also tell us to learn humility, not a false humility but a humility from the heart, knowing that we are nothing and God is everything. Jesus did say Be ye perfect even as your Father in heaven is perfect but He was not talking about natural perfection. We need look at ourselves and see what in us is not like Jesus, whom we love. We want to be like Him because we love Him. He told us things to do, such as, love your enemies, pray in secret, etc. Those kinds of things will help us get closer to Him. Now, cleanliness is next to godliness but does it bug you if every thread of the carpet is not going the same way? How is that going to get you to heaven? The secret is your motive. You have to look at the motive. Learn to love God first and foremost in your life and God will direct your paths. Everything else will fall into place when you have your priorities straightened out. I wish you the best.