Guest shiloh357 Posted September 2, 2016 Share Posted September 2, 2016 It is just my opinion but I think part of the church paid staff ought to be a licensed Christian counselor who has an advanced degree in that field. Make that a ministry office of the local church. He or she should keep office hours at the church and work by appointment. It would take immense pressure off of pastors and keep them out of legal trouble. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmuffet Posted September 2, 2016 Group: Royal Member Followers: 34 Topic Count: 1,993 Topics Per Day: 0.48 Content Count: 48,691 Content Per Day: 11.76 Reputation: 30,343 Days Won: 226 Joined: 01/11/2013 Status: Offline Share Posted September 2, 2016 15 minutes ago, Yowm said: Marriage, simple problems? Do you think the problems in 'Boundaries' are too tough for a pastor? A Pastor needs to have wisdom and common sense. He needs to ask himself " can I really help his couple with their problems or is there someone else more qualified?". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmuffet Posted September 2, 2016 Group: Royal Member Followers: 34 Topic Count: 1,993 Topics Per Day: 0.48 Content Count: 48,691 Content Per Day: 11.76 Reputation: 30,343 Days Won: 226 Joined: 01/11/2013 Status: Offline Share Posted September 2, 2016 18 minutes ago, Flsnookman said: It is people like you who have driven away far more would be Christians than any other factor through out history. Oh he posted a non Christian band lets run and tell or delete. Never mind most of the thread was making fun of the op. Well done!! It is that very attitude that makes it so very difficult for those walking in the light to attract unbelievers, its called a holier than thou attitude and not only is it satan's most effective tool it's also ugly and very unChristian. I am a child of God. I do not listen to secular music until I have read the lyrics. If those lyrics do not bring praise to God I just simply do not listen to the song. The Holy Spirit guides my ways. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmuffet Posted September 2, 2016 Group: Royal Member Followers: 34 Topic Count: 1,993 Topics Per Day: 0.48 Content Count: 48,691 Content Per Day: 11.76 Reputation: 30,343 Days Won: 226 Joined: 01/11/2013 Status: Offline Share Posted September 2, 2016 20 minutes ago, Out of the Shadows said: Yes, this is the key. The problem is that far too many pastors think like the poster above, that the secular world has nothing to offer and that they can fix it all. I would only go to a Christian therapist and get Christian advise. I would not take advise from the "world". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmuffet Posted September 2, 2016 Group: Royal Member Followers: 34 Topic Count: 1,993 Topics Per Day: 0.48 Content Count: 48,691 Content Per Day: 11.76 Reputation: 30,343 Days Won: 226 Joined: 01/11/2013 Status: Offline Share Posted September 2, 2016 I say if that husband and wife shiloh was talking about are happy step back and let them live their lives. Now if abuse is involved or if one of them is extremely unhappy that is another issue. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmuffet Posted September 2, 2016 Group: Royal Member Followers: 34 Topic Count: 1,993 Topics Per Day: 0.48 Content Count: 48,691 Content Per Day: 11.76 Reputation: 30,343 Days Won: 226 Joined: 01/11/2013 Status: Offline Share Posted September 2, 2016 9 minutes ago, Yowm said: Where was Christendom before 'psychology' appeared on the scene in the 19th century? Before the world started treating those who needed psychology seriously their were all kinds of strange ideas. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Running Gator Posted September 2, 2016 Group: Royal Member * Followers: 8 Topic Count: 91 Topics Per Day: 0.03 Content Count: 10,596 Content Per Day: 3.67 Reputation: 2,743 Days Won: 25 Joined: 06/16/2016 Status: Offline Share Posted September 2, 2016 (edited) 6 minutes ago, Yowm said: So psychology brought the world out of pagan superstitions? Even Christendom was in darkness until psychology came as a 'savior'? People with psychological problems were thought to be witches or have demons in them. Lots of fun ways were used to remove them. Then again, maybe they were on to something and instead of counselling sessions we should go back to the dunking chair and stake burning. Christendom has some dark days in its history. Edited September 2, 2016 by Out of the Shadows Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GoldenEagle Posted September 2, 2016 Group: Royal Member Followers: 4 Topic Count: 764 Topics Per Day: 0.18 Content Count: 7,626 Content Per Day: 1.80 Reputation: 1,559 Days Won: 44 Joined: 10/03/2012 Status: Offline Author Share Posted September 2, 2016 1 hour ago, hmbld said: GE: Seems like people don't love her enough to try to help her change I guess. Hold on now. How do you love someone enough to help them change? GE: We are responsible to, not for each other. We are to love one another, not be one another. If we are only responsible "to" one another, and not "for" each other, than I fail to understand your point about loving someone enough to help them change, if they don't want to change, or they don't know how to overcome their jealousy/codependence, how do you achieve this? My understanding is it is usually detrimental to undertake the challenge of changing someone else, when maybe it is all we can do to yield ourselves to what God wants to change in us. Boundaries, does one step over other's boundaries to determine to help them change? Enabling someone is not love. Healthy boundaries would be to say that you will not enable them in their bad behavior. In other words, if you are their friends you could say. "I understand this is how your relationship works. However, I'm not going to participate." My wife was very controlling when we first were married. She was also very codependent on me. The husband needs to be challenged to step up and lead his family. Just my 2 cents. I'm still learning about this myself. Their relationship is their side of the fence. Your life is your side of the fence. I feel very sorry for this couple. There's another book I'm going to read after finishing this one that is called "Boundaries in marriage". Seems like that is what this couples need. God bless, GE Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Running Gator Posted September 2, 2016 Group: Royal Member * Followers: 8 Topic Count: 91 Topics Per Day: 0.03 Content Count: 10,596 Content Per Day: 3.67 Reputation: 2,743 Days Won: 25 Joined: 06/16/2016 Status: Offline Share Posted September 2, 2016 2 minutes ago, Yowm said: yeah yeah and I suppose Christians were involved in the Crusades and Hitler was a Christian. Appears you've been spoon fed off liberal revisionism that doesn't know up from down when it comes to what constitutes a true Christian. Don't think Hitler was a Christian, but if you do that's ok. It is silly to try and look back 1000 years and claim who was and who was not a "true Christian" since we today cannot even decide what that really mean. But putting that aside, it does everyone a disservice to try and ignore the dark actions of Christendom down through the ages. Like it or not these things were being done in the name of Christ by people proclaiming to be Christians. The only revisionism going on is by those who are not secure enough to admit to our dark dealings. I bet you don't think the US did anything wrong in the last 200 years either, those were not "true Americans. A like just for you...https://yourlogicalfallacyis.com/no-true-scotsman Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GoldenEagle Posted September 2, 2016 Group: Royal Member Followers: 4 Topic Count: 764 Topics Per Day: 0.18 Content Count: 7,626 Content Per Day: 1.80 Reputation: 1,559 Days Won: 44 Joined: 10/03/2012 Status: Offline Author Share Posted September 2, 2016 22 hours ago, GoldenEagle said: But trying to get back on track... the subject of this thread is boundaries. 3 hours ago, GoldenEagle said: @Yowm has a view that anyone who has issues can be counseled solely with the Bible. Out of the Shadows disagrees asserting that mental and psychological training is necessary. Since Christendom cannot agree on this subject on a macro level it shouldn't surprise us this is the case on this thread. Please feel free to start another thread on the roles of a pastor if you'd like to discuss it further. This thread is about boundaries. Thanks! @Yowm and @Out of the Shadows I've asked you guys multiple times to stay on topic. Please start a new thread if you'd like to discuss this idea of role of pastors, psychologists, the Crusades, Hitler, liberalist revisionism, etc. God bless, GE Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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