Abused children

[Rick McCadden]

Please take a second to respond. I work with these children and would like to know what people think.  

Thanks in advance.

In Christ Rick

[Guest Desire4Freedom]

Dear Mr. McCadden,

I wanted to say that the way your pole is set up it makes it hard to understand exactly what you are asking people. I do not think many of the places you listed are doing enough to help children, teens aduts or even the elderly.

I don't think the government helps. I don't think the church does enough to help. I don't think agencies do enough to help, I don't think americans in general do enough to help.

And not just not help kids who are beaten and abused but kids with mental illness or even adults who are beaten, abused or have mental illness.

I can just hear some people cracking jokes at what I am saying but it is true and I have some examples I could use. All I am saying is sometimes even the christians are shooting (wounding) those with emotional problems, spiritual problems, mental problems. Because they don't want to believe they exist or because they think its for attention or whatever.

So they poke fun or they ignore the people. Not just adults but teens as well. They think the teens are just wanting attention or they are just having a pity party. I have seen many teens die because of this very thing. It breaks my heart. I have seen some adults die from this as well.

They die because no one wanted to listen or no one wanted to take the time to reach out. They die because no one wanted to get involved.

They did not want to get out of their comfort zone.

I will get off my soap box now. I just know I have seen this happen way to many times. Especially out here in the mid west.

However, Mr. McCadden. I still think it is so awesome that you work with kids and teens. I do hope that God will bless you so abundantly for all you do for them and with them.

Desire4Freedom

(Jeannette)

:x:

[Anonymous]

Hi "Desire4Freedom"

(Yes Mr. McCadden, the answer choices in your poll are confusing....)

[jesusislord]

my oponion.... the goverment tires to help the abused children but shoule we as christians be more involved with the victums and families.. .... ... What do christians do about gettinf involved in others lives. .

...... THE goverment should not be responiible for the poor....WE as christians should be....... why arent we....... have we become like the world...... ask your self.........

............. DOES ANYBODY LOVE THE LORD ANYMORE......

DOES ANYBODY LOVE THE LORD ANYMORE.

[irishcowboy]

The Government is toooooo big now, have been for a long long long time.... suppose to be a government for the people by the people, it is more of a government over the people..... I do not believe the government should have such a hand in raising the children.....

This should be an area where the church and the parents train the children to raise the next generation and train that generation up to raise the next and so on, as the Bible tells us to do.... the men shall teach the boys, the women shall teach the girls..... the elder teaching the younger.......

this is really not happening, we have allowed the government to interfer...... when a woman is arrested for disciplining her child for an act that is wrong, then the government is too big..( one swat on the butt for taking a candy bar off the shelf in a grocery store and eating it, when the mother said NO is not abuse ).....

as parents we need to be more active in our childs upbringing.... as Christians, we need to train up the rest of society to raise up their children properly... and put the brakes on abuse......

we also need to watch for those around us that are in abusive situations, children in schools, workers in the work place, patients in the hospitals and nursing homes, parents from their children, so forth and so on..... we can put a stop to this abuse with out any government intervention.....

we have the power to stop some abuse this very day, and we can continue to slow it down and bring it to a stand still as each day goes on......... we can start by watching our very own tongues.... then watching our very own actions.....

mike

[Ash]

Yeh - that vote is confusing...! I was an abused child myself, so I'm always on the lookout for ministries for abused kids; and while I have noticed an increase in "worldly" outreaches to this problem, I still feel that the church could do a lot more in this area. I've only been in the States for three months though, so I'll probably (hopefully) amend this opinion later...?

[Catsmeow]

Rick: I'm a former teacher. I also worked with DCF services for foster care of abused children - I managed one of the emergency shelters.

I am very familiar with the problem of abuse, both physical, mental and sexual.

The ROOT of the problem isn't ..."we need more programs"...the ROOT of the problem is the sin nature inherant in all human beings.

Most of the children I dealt with were cases of profound neglect, rather than outright "beatings or tortures"...The children's parents were on crack and didn't feed or cloth the children; left the children vulnerable to sexual attack by friends and drug dealers because they were "cracked out" or selling the child in some way for drugs...

The root of the problem is sin. When you reach the parents of these children, you reach the problem.

Yes, you can apply a bandage....and get DCF to contract with more Foster Care Agencies and crack down on more abusive/neglective parents...or you can go into schools and provide "education"...

It does nothing to deal with the root of the problem...which is in the human heart to begin with.

To deal with child abuse effectively, you spread the love of Jesus Christ to every SINGLE PERSON you meet on the street, in the store, et al....and let people know there's HOPE.

Help people find the "Truth" who will set them free, and they, in turn...will become good parents. God will lead them into all truth...but we must introduce them to Him. That's our commission.

Families have been radically changed by the ministries we often see on 700 Club and other ministries. Lives are changed ...daily...but each one of us have a responsibility to individually reach out to the lost....

Let our lives be a witness of love and compassion to others...and be sensitive in spirit to those around us who are hurting and possibly reaching out for answers.

[Guest onevoice]

Im 54 years old but I was an abused child, being sexually molested by every male member of my family except my father. Abused children do not trust adults because its adults who abuse them. Its hard to reach them until you gain their trust. Until you get their trust, let them know you love them and want to protect them from harm. I say this because it is difficult to find these children until they speak up and say (Im being abused) Schools and churches need to teach all their children what to do if they are being abused and by that some may reach out for help. Churches do not deal with it because they do not believe that the christians in their church abuse children.

The same thing goes for adults, many are abused by their children or grand-children and they are afraid to speak up as well. They do not want their child to go to jail, they just want the abuse to stop. They are also embarrased that they don't have control in their own home.

Sorry, I just had to add my two cents

onevoice

[papasangel]

Rick,

Bless you for your work with children who are abused. From my experience with Social Services I can say you have a tough job. I have a sister who called Social Serives on our family at the drop of a hat. You see when I decided to homeschool she thought I was irresponsible. When we changed to the Mennonite faith she thought we were a cult. The rest of the times was because she just plain had a grudge against our family. Each and every time Social services came out and investigated. The only thing they could find was that I was trying to make it on a way below poverty income without help from foodstamps etc. My husband was unable to wrok and finances ere slim. So dishes were done once a day to conserve soap and water. Laundry was done by hand to conserve water and electricity, you get the drift.

Some people today use Social services as a weapon against those they hold a grudge at. Granted its in a small percentage of cases but that small number prophibits children who are being beaten and scarred and raped from getting help by tying up the system. We as Christians should be looking out for our children and the children around us. If you suspect a child is being abused, have a proffessional look into it. But before you do remember that Social Services is a government program that is straining at the seams. Too many children fall into the cracks and get lost in the system. Remember that each child is a special person growing into adulthood. If you see a distressed family there are things you can do to help.

If the family has little food, have the church pitch in and help fill the larder. Clothing can be given without shame to those who have several children in their family and cannot afford to buy new clothes. Volunteer to help out the parents with a night away from the children so they can have some "down" time and strengthen their relationship. Strong relationships builds strong families. Building a child's self esteem by offering a few chores and payment so he or she can have some pocket money also gives that child a sense of responsibility and pride.

There are more ideas but time is short for me today. So I leave you with that. God Bless.

[darkest_red]

I work for Childrens social services legal department in P'boro, England, and i dont think enough is being done..,. there are too many times when it is obvious that a child is in danger... one case recently the mother said at the birth that she was going to 'make [the child] pay' for the pain she was in yet the child was still sent home with the mother despite the obvious danger... the doctors/midwife had heared her say it but didnt get an Emergency Protection Order... that is definitely not in the childs interests. There have been a few cases like this, when social services have not done anything until it is too late and the child is in serious danger (for instance, the above childs injuries were life threatening). It obviously isnt in the child's best interest.

However, it is easy just to blame social services or other agencies, but the parents are also too blame. In an old case we had the mother of a child was letting her boyfriends landlord sexually abuse her young daughter (the mothers partner alleged she got payed to let this man interfere with the child, however the mother disputed this) almost nightly without any regard for the child herself. The same child was having sex with this (50 year old) man from the age of 11

It is most parents natural instinct to protect their child, no matter what but there have been a number of cases like this. Agencies, like social services are so easy to blame but we cant forget cases like the above where the childs parents, who should be doing there upmost to protect the child or children decide to put their own needs first.

At the end of the day, agencies can only do so much, but parents arent superman either. I consider myself very lucky to have a family who love me and would do anything to protect me, a good home (even though its not my ideal house, its better than some) and everything else that i take for granted.

Whereas my work can at times be highly disturbing (for instance, in one case a 13 year old boy wrote a letter asking his 11 year old sister to go to his room that night for sex, which she then consented to. She was sexually abused by all 5 of her brothers) it has shown me exactly how lucky i am to have what i have- a normal family and life at homed, which is much more than a lot of people have.