Steps to Stand

[Treasure]

STEPS TO STAND

In praying for direction concerning this writing, God rerouted me. My belief is that He wants to convey an important message in a way that is clear, applicable and understandable.

I say this of course, only after God revealed to me why He wanted me to share this teaching in this way. God has shown me how to take the five letters of the word "stand" and use them in an acronym.

SIMPLIFY

1Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us.

Heb. 12:1 NIV

The Greek word used for "hinder" is Ogkos and it means whatever is prominent, protuberance, bulk, mass hence a burden, weight, encumbrance. The image that I get from the Greek meaning together with the Scripture is my running a race and suddenly being tripped and made to stumble. Thus, we must throw off things that may not even appear to be entanglements to us so that we may persevere in the race that God has set for us. We each have a call on our lives and things to accomplish for Him but sometimes the enemy will put blocks in the way in an effort to get our focus off of God.

An obstacle that could make us trip would be obviously visible, right? Not a chance. If the goal is to make me stumble it needs to be hidden. In order to overcome that we have to know what might be hiding in the shadows.

Wal-Mart is a dreaded place for me. It seems to make no difference what time I go, there always seem to be a million people there and I have to park a long way from the door. Just when I deal with that, I start looking at my list and begin putting things into my cart and I see all kinds of things that are demanding my attention. It's too hard for me to focus with so many people everywhere and so many choices. Then I would go through the check-out and feel guilty and panick for buying anything that wasn't on my list. I had actually started to think of myself as a failure because I dislike Wal-Mart so much and would procrastinate about going there.

God showed me something amazing as I got quiet and listened to Him. It's ok for me to not like Wal-Mart. The obstacle then was "why do I go there to buy groceries and household supplies when it stresses me so much"? I didn't have an answer for that other than that I didn't know. I learned that God didn't tell me to go to Wal-Mart and the fact that my friends go there and find good buys for themselves and their families doesn't obligate me to do the same.

There is a grocery store 2 minutes from my house. It's rarely crowded and there is a gas station with it. Yes, it is a bit more expensive than Wal-Mart but it doesn't cost me in stress.

My point is that I felt like I was supposed to shop at a store that I don't like because "everyone else does it". It sounds like a childish thing to me saying it now but that's the real truth. I had put so much pressure on myself to do things to stretch my family budget as far as it could go that it was having detrimental effects on me in many areas.

Grocery is still not something that I enjoy but I don't procrastinate until my family and I are on the verge of starvation.

Studying was also a stumbling block for me. In my hunger to understand God more I would study for hours to find the deeper meanings of words. While there is nothing wrong with that, I became obsessed. I would study until there was no time for me to do what was required of me to keep my home running smoothly. It took valuable time away from my family. There was never enough time for me to do what I believed had to be done (studying, writing, preparing, etc.). I would get one thing done and not be satisfied with it and go back to redo it. It was never good enough. My reading became an unpleasant chore rather than something that I enjoyed and wanted to share with others.

One day I was reading a book about studying the Bible and the words "muddying the waters" caught my attention. How could I have been so blind? My desire to learn and teach and study had become a burden. I understood the burden but what I hadn't realized was that God hadn't intended for this teaching to be a burden or hardship. There is nothing wrong with my getting pleasure from the words that He gives me. In fact, it's quite the opposite. Our relationship with God is supposed to bring us peace, not frustration.

I heard Beth Moore say once that when we get into frustration that we have given into sin. God doesn't intend for us to be frustrated. It's one thing for us to struggle but it's something completely to be frustrated. It implies an absence of peace.

Somewhere during this time reading my Bible and praying became things that I had to do but didn't enjoy. My love for God hadn't changed at all but my relationship with Him was changing and it frightened me. I began to only read the numerous devotions that I get daily in e-mail. That worked until I happened to be looking for something else online and would see a link for a website that might be interesting. There would be more devotions that I didn't get and read daily. Guilt and condemnation would set in again.

After a couple of weeks of this and my coming to wonder about the authenticity of my relationship with God, I finally decided to just talk to Him about it. Again, what He told me was profound to me.

Why did I have to make everything so complicated? Who or what was I trying to impress in doing all of the things that I was doing? Why couldn't I get everything done that I thought was necessary in order to be productive in my own eyes as well as those of my friends? The answer was so simple. Things don't have to be complicated but I often choose to make them that way. I was trying to prove myself to everyone who had questioned my ability in any way. I was so afraid of failure that I was drifting toward that very thing. My productivity hadn't been questioned by anyone but me. I was my own obstacle.

That was another glimpse of peace. Then there was prayer and my prayer journal. It was a useful instrument for a season (and might be again) but for now God wanted something different. God showed me that He was remodeling my prayer life. He was almost constantly on my mind and is constantly in my heart. It was a box of my own making that was hindering me. Just because there weren't so many words that were coming from my mouth didn't mean that I wasn't in an attitude of prayer and wasn't having communication with my Lord. I had finally come to the point in my life that I was comfortable enough with Him that I was actually being still and listening.

I looked back at what had been going on in my heart for the last couple of weeks and the struggle that had been within me was from my own guilt and condemnation. When I slowed down and realized that what I saw was something that I had had all along but it had been buried beneath so many things that I had forgotten that it was even there. I didn't have to be chasing after God because He was right there all along.

The realization of that was so freeing to me words can't express. I had been in the very place that God wanted me to be but I was so busy thinking that it had to be more that I didn't see the peace. I wasn't experiencing what was right before me because I had complicated it.

In His abundant mercy God showed me that He had taken me back to the heart of worship because it was and is all about Him. What a beautifully simple message.

Right now I'm not studying too much because it's more important in my relationship with Him for me just read and not try to dig into it. It's more important for me to be quiet and still and listen than for me to always be the one talking. I do love to talk to God and share things with Him as my most trusted friend and confidant. Just as in any other relationship, there is a time to listen. Trust that He knows your heart better than you do. Listen to Him because He is talking. If you don't hear Him, get still.

Since I have begun to be quiet and listen God has reminded me that I love the song of nature. Many days after the kids go to school I open the windows, turn off the television and radio and listen to His song. He speaks in the quiet so often and I so often drift into sleep.

"Testify" and "Accept" both go with this.