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I remember that here in England we heard something on the news on the radio.. So We put the T.V. on... There were going all over the story from the start, for the people that had just turned on.... We just sat quietly..In shock I think..at first I though it was one of those of those films that had not been advertised for some reason.... I just stared and stared at the T.V. in shock mostly.. it was so hard to take it all in... after a couple of hours of watching it..we slowly realised that this was indeed for real...For a while though I prayed for the world for peace and for these dreadful things to stop, too much had happened......... In fact we watched it all day..feeling so helpless, that you were all so very far away... ...But God wasn' t and I talked to him, than get lapsing back into shock again....... I do remember a lot of firemen arriving to hopefully help everyone,,, They took the film of them quite near, you could see their faces and emotions..... What a great shock not long after, when we heard that all those wonderful people.of the firemen had been caught by some more of the tower falling down.and were all gone now too...{Hope I have remembered that right..] That was another distressing nightmare to have seen, and very take too...I know I cried at times, but exactly when, I do not know , I think it took some days,to even get halfway back to acting with any normality at all... A few days after, I went to our local supermarket,,In Sainsburys.......and found that they had a really huge book, for people to put their messages in...To write to the people of the America to also to talk about how the ones on the other side of the pond.. I heard that a lot of these big books were being sent from all over England and other places.......I was relieved.. and by just writing a single mssage, to people that I had never met or saw, it helped me greatly..as they all were part of our very large family of the human race.... And I just wanted them to know, that we were all shocked too..and were really thinking of them all, with the greatest Love and Understanding....And The Biggest Compassion and Sincere Empathy.. And we were sharing in their sorrow, their Grief, and all their churned up emotions too.... Well I think it went something like that anyway.........and tried to tell them that God was still there...and loved to hear their prayers.....and a few other things like that.. I had gone quite early in the morning....Others had written in the book, and I was the only one at that time writing in it..but as soon, as I had finished, one by one, others took each others places, to write their own personal messages too.......A wonderful idea...It somehow felt that through those message books.., there was a feeling of hearts meeting...and as I liked to think, of hearts and hands linking from England to the U.S. Books were being sent from all over I think.....I was sincere in the thought's that I did hope the poeple of america, would feel not too alone.... and hopefully knew that the messages came to them from friends, with wishes for a better future.. I asked them to remember the ones that had laid down their lives.. they would have wanted to have the remaining people to begin again....life had to go on..it just had too .. Amen....X+

Good question.. I've been a Christian for quite a while now, As I told Honor, at welcome yesterday, I've been a Christian quite a while now..and through my great age now.. of 180yrs old..ha! ha! and all that experiance..Ahem..I somehow have gotten to know, that usually the Lord say's something like, No!--Wait a while..or guess what is coming next week....I Jest a little bit.. but it is something like that... Patience is a virtue possess it if you can... Anyway,that is usually how I think it out.. message X+

I wondered if the little boy, was all set to be Twins.. They did say, "He was born from one embryo, but there was a developmental anomaly", perhaps that might be what it meant... Several years ago in England.. there was a documentry, on T.V. here.. it was shown a few times in the next few months, from the first screening...Wonder if the film came over to your T.V.? And on Gay burn's show.. which took place in Ireland..Most Evening's.....during one of his show, during the last part of it, at the end, after introducing them..the mum wheeled her two daughters on... I can only remember ones name...she was called Elisher ..cannot remember the other ones name.. they were only babies, they were sitting up though..And until it was explained,a little later... At first...to see them, one thought that they had two heads on one body....But It was explained , that they were in fact twins.. that they did have four arm's, but they were in such a way, that they had each others arms around the other sister, at the back... I think they had three legs.Meaning that the legs were where they should be..one of the sisters only had one leg though.. thay did share some internal organs though........Yes they were Siamese. twins.. But they did look like this dear little boy....I really think that they are brothers, but whatever it was, that supposed to happen didn't, therefore, they did not want to make it even more sensational, as the crowds were already filled with gret curiosity, and did not want them to get even more worked up.. I will not put any more about them, in case you have seen that documentary too I wonder did any of you see the documentary I spoke about..??? It is good to see these sort of things...as One has experianced them, and, after a while, one understands a lot more about them. And have gotten used to them , then they do not seem any other that what they are.. two dear little sisters....Amen...

Hello, Sheryl&Jesus, Nice to meet you.. I am very sorry, that you are feeling so very distraught..I have the dreaded depression too, its a hard lot to deal with at times , isn't it.. And I do understand, all that you have said too, 'been there'..as they say... I think that feeling of rejection, is a really horrible one too,it can almost disintegrate ones feelings.. and can bring one to feeling oh! so low!!! Some years ago, I had a bad bout of this feeling of rejection.. It is so painful isn't it.. It sort of makes one feel, that ones whole world, is slowely coming to an end, and it also eats right away at all ones confidence, one may have at that time.. Ho! Hum!! it eats and eats away.... and makes you feel so dreadful in the end.. One just feels that things are 'never,' going to change, and one will be somehow, 'stuck', that way for ever more.. I don't know about you, but I had a bout of feeling, that everyone was getting at me. [i was in hospital at the time..] And it got so bad, that in the end, 'Anything', 'Anyone', said to me.. felt like a rejection...just simple everyday talk.. in the end, I just didn't want to talk to anyone..I didn't want to hear anything, even though deep down, I must have known....that most of it was the illness, not them... It does not help make for a happy-daytime living does it.. But of course, in the end, like a lot of things, it did come to an end..Phew! You know, there is still a Stigma', about 'Mental Illness'.. People that have never suffered with it, of course still do not understand about it.. What I think it may be, is sometimes the fault of the media..when they are looking for someone, who say has escaped from a hospital, and you hear on the new's, 'they are known to be dangerous'.... Somehow, everyone else, becomes sort of 'tarred with the same brush', and others think, one might also be like that.. Even though, there are many other, sort of things, illness's, that people can suffer from, in a very mild way, right up the scale, to those warnings, 'that they may be dangerous'... Although I must say, that the media here, especially T.V. show's a lot of documentarys, about all sort's of things, that others suffer from, some of them, one has not even heard of them, before, either.... I do watch these at times, on T.V. as I think the more one knows about things, then if one saw someone, in a way that, one has seen on T.V. then, hopefully if you came across such a person.. hopefully, one has let all the shock out ,on the T.V. and hopefully, would not show such expressions, in life now...Hope it would help just a bit, anyway to lesson such feelings, on ones face.. After all when all said and done, we are known as the 'Human Race', aren't we, and are related to everyone else, too...Aren't we..Well, it's worth a thought or two, isn't it..... As for crying, you saying that you cannot stop crying... Well! I always say, that if God had not wanted us to cry, then he wouldn't have given us tear duct's, would he! True!!Crying is very good for one.. it gives one a good more relaxed feeling, after one has had a good cry..Crying, releases not only tears, but a lot of stress, too.. In fact, Crying is one of the best 'clear out', things ever... A brilliant idea, from the best Physician, Ever! Praise The Lord!!!..Amen.. Well Sheryl, sorry that I may have rambled on a bit.. My hope in sending you this post, is to let you know, that you are not the only one to have these odd feelings.. there are lots of us..Honest!!! Just walking about..Looking quite normal, from the outside anyway... I think that people, whom do not look , in any way impaired, from the outside, are usually known, as ,'The Walking Wounded'... Nice to speak to you Sister... I will put some hopefully Hopeful things below for you... I will be praying for you..I know just how you feel.. Take Care Sis. won't you.. And anytime you feel like this, why not send me a P.M. I will answer you, and try to be a support for you, for as long as you want... Take Great Care.. And may the Lord Shine His amazing Light, On to your narrow path, Each day. And show you the way, More easily. Love and Compassion, From message X+ ******************* WHY WONDER? *********** If radio's slim fingers can pluck a melody From the night and toss it over a continent or sea; If the petalled white notes of a violin are blown across a mountain or a city's din; If songs, like crimson roses are culled from the thin blue air; Why should mortals wonder that God hears and answers prayer? By Ethel Romig Fuller. page 193. From the book 'Timeless Teasures'. Classic Quotations for Speaking, writing, and teaching.. Published by Hendrickson.Inc. 1992,2000. ******************************* Prayer doesn't get man's will done in heaven; it gets Gods will done on earth.. By Ron Dunn. ******************************** When nothing seems to help, I go and look at a stonecutter hammering away at his rock perhaps a hundred times without as much as a crack showing in it. Yet at the hundred and first blow it will split in two, and I know it was not the blow that did it-- but all that had gone before. -Jacob Ris. ********************************** However, if you suffer because you are a Christian. Don't be ashamed of it, But thank God that you bear Christs name. 1 Peter 4: Verse: 16. Good News Bible. *********************************** Be gentle with yourself, learn to love yourself, to forgive yourself, for only as we have the right attitude toward ourselves can we have the right attitude toward others.. By Wilfred Peterson. ************************ Leave home in the sunshine: Dance through a meadow-- Or sit by a stream and just be. The lilt of the water Will gather your worries And carry them down to the sea. By J. Donald Walters. ************************** Before me is a future all unknown, A path untrod; Beside me is a friend well loved and known, That friend is God. ************ Before me lies a new and untried way. Midst shadows dim; Beside me is my Guide, and day by day, I walk with Him. By Ruth Thomas.. ****************************** "Thou hast enlarged me"--e'en when in distress! "Thou hast enlarged me"--made me more like Thee. Sorrows which came, and things of painfulness, Thou hast employed me--yea, but to develop me. ********** "Thou hast enlarged me!--Thou dost most behold Need for enlargement , deep within the soul; And Thou doest use, not always things of Gold-- Things ofttimes dark--when sorrows billows roll. *********** "Thou hast enlarged me!"--using things of pain-- Things I would fain have had Thee take away; Things which to me, betokened naught of gain-- Thou hast used these , enlargement to convey. *********** "Thou hast enlarged me!" Yea, 'tis all clear now! "Thou hast enlarged me!" e'en when sore distressed: "Thou hast enlarged!"I woshipfully bow, And gladly sing the discipline which blest". BY J. Danson Smith *****************************************

HI! nebula.. Well, we do not have to crash down for long..we can have little crashes, can't we..I have had some long blank dark tunnel crashes.... But, after trying to think what one I would send you...The Lord suggested one, to me.. And its this one..[Might help her smile, if nothing else.] Anyway, the Lord already knows what her reaction's will be..So here we go.. It happened several years ago, When I was looking after Mum, who had dementure... I have always been a placid (patient!) sort of person........... It happened, during one warm summers afternoon...I had been seeing to my Mum.. who I loved very much..We were fan clubs, of each other..really.... Well Mum and Dad, had to wait 10 years before they had me.... Anyway it all sort of whelled (h?) up inside me.. all those emotions of heartbreak, and that one never, ever thought, thought one would ever see, ones Mum, so Ill..most of the time so quiet too, not talking...Her little hands all screwed up almost in a ball,with arthritis, in fact she couldn't open and close her hands, they were just stuck like that however..She had a lot of arthritis all over her.. and in her knees too..I often used to rub cream in her legs to sooth the arthritis...... She had always done whatever she could for us.. When knitting came into being.. she used to knit things for us. all.... We were never a rich family.. but we had riches, far beyond the monetary means.. Anyway.. I went into our garden.. and sat down on the garden seat.. Yes! I felt all in.. and out of strength.. During the morning, I had been out in the garden with my son..That boy knows a lot about most things..and he is so interesting too.. he must have been about 11-12 years then...I had really enjoyed our talk, we had gone all over our small garden, in fact I felt like, I knew the garden, a whole lot more, since listening to him.. One of the things we had spoken about at length, was about ants, and he explained , a lot of their process of life..a lot of different things that they did for each other....Our English garden ants, are only tiny. All doing little jobs to help each other .. it had been such mind blowing stuff...to learn in such a way... So as I sat there that afternoon...resting, from my tiredness and worry about my loved one's..I found my self deep in thought about the Garden ants...... As I sat there, I saw an ant, walking, it seemed to walk quiet quickly, but it must have really have been 'Many Ant Miles', really.... As I watched it, I got so really engrossed, the world had seemingly 'gone away', and it was, 'Just The Ant And I', together......I just kept watching it, walking it had something on it's back too, which seemed so heavy and hard to manage.. It was a leaf on its back with something else on the leaf.. And then I remembered something that my son had told me in the morning, during his talk on the ants.....He said that Ants were very tidy things..some had different jobs to do.. some he said , had to help clear their home out.. [forgotten what he called it! It is where they live..] And he said if any ant had died, they had to take that away from the home.. Then I knew without a doubt, that the story about the ants, had all been in Gods plan..... I started watching it again.. It had gone about halfway, many times, or even less.. then just as he was getting there..a sudden breeze had come, where there had not been a trace, of any, before.....He had had to pick up his load and start all over again.... I found I had become the ants cheer leader, and how I had become, to love and care for that little ant, and was praying for it for ages.... I tell you it was really quiet an Experiance... The times that Ant, put his lot down, only to have another gust of wind, blow it back, almost to where the ant had first started from, in the first place.... I was whispering to it.. go on, don't stop, how many times it takes..keep on, try, try, and try again.. you must take that dead ant, away from your home.. It's part of your Job.................. I watched the ant.. and after all that, no breeze came , and he put it down on the earth, which was opposite where it had come from.... I whispered to my ant..and the Lord..Hallelujah!! thank you Lord, thank you. And I realised, that God might have put on this little show,for my sake .. I sat there, for a moment...Thinking about Mum, and how much I loved her, and how helpless she had become.. .. She and Dad, had never let me down, they had always been there for me..... I went back indoors.. feeling rested and also strengthened (?) By an Ant.. And I just could not forget those words.. Try! Try! and Try again!!! I went into the room, where my Mum was sitting, just looking straight ahead.. And gave her a kiss on the cheek, and a little hug..She didn't even turn around.. But I just whispered to her..I love you Mum.........Amen.....

Hello, Willow.. Do you know I always read and reread my posts...lots of times, I have to.. Anyway, I made a post to you last night,[English time.] I had reread it many time's, On the preview,and back to the one that I am writing on.. Bit like a yo-yo, it goes.. [Probably like we most do..I have to do it because of short memory and all the end bits from my breakdown.] Anyway..I thought it was O.K. But when I came to read it after I had posted it to you. Well please except my apology...Willow..[i was really horrified, when I read it..I just didn't mean it the way it had come out.. actually, I think I had got a bit lost, when I wrote that.. That paragraph, did not have a place in the post anyway.. ] It is when I am talking about, pointing at anyone..[Now why I should have put all that..I really do not know..Think there was a point when I started it, but when I got along, must have got a bit lost..But didn't discover it till it was posted.. Its just the bit at the end of all that paragraph...Hence--'So do not do it'.... Now silly as that may sound, after it was posted, last night, it has really worried me, ever since, and has come into my mind countless times.. The Lord must have been speaking to me, that is what I think now, and so I have posted this, to try and make amends, Willow please forgive me.. I do hope that I have not upset you too much with it...I just had to write and apologize, to you........Sorry, about that I really am, and you are so nice too.. My aim to be at Worthy, is to help people , to help give ruffled feather's, some smooth, balming oil, to help unruffle them, at least to be a very small cog in the works, that work to unruffle things... One thing I 'never' want to do is, ruffle - already ruffled people.. I think that there is much too much of that going on in the world already.. We all should be 'Unruffled', people....Really.. I only hope that this has worked towards the good, that this post was setting out to do... Have A Bright And Happy Future, All My Love and Sincere Wishes, From message X+

Hello Willow.. I was so sorry to hear all, that you have gone through.. Nobody! Whoever they are.......can tell whats around any corner....Waiting to pounce on one from another corner...... We all make mistakes......Making mistakes is one way, that God teaches us life-lessons. The worst thing anyone can do, is not to learn from them.... I once saw a preacher talking, and he said no-one should ever point a finger at another...Ever!!. And he asked us all to just point.. so we did.. The preacher said, now I am going to to tell you something... That they say, if anyone points another finger at anyone... Then there will always be three fingers pointing to you....Try it..just point.. Then look back, at your own hand.. and you will find that there are the three fingers pointing back at yourself..........True..... So never do it... It looks like you are sorting yourselfs out Willow.. It takes longer for some, that others, to get settled down.... Maybe round the next corner.... A new road, a new start.. Moving on, lessons greatly learnt.....into a new area of life... Maybe some of the dreams you used to have, Will now begin to Bear fruit...Much better times ahead for all of you... My prayers are with you Willow..... May Your Future ,Day by Day.. Slowely, Start To Shine and Shine May The Lord, Shower You With Blessings, May Jesus show you how far, It is that you both have walked.. Much further, than you thought.. Seems you maybe halfway, to the top, of that Green Hill, That Holds your Dreams safe for you... Just A little walk longer..only a while...now.. May God Bless You, With Assurance, Understanding And Strength, For They Come From Those Lessons That You Have Both Been Learning..... Not much further now....Willow!! With Love and God Bless, From message X+

Hello there, Knight of light.. Well thats a bit of a tough one you have there... Your idea seems quite good..but once one goes into such a thing, it usually turns out that it has many more sides to it than one first thought, that is quite a deep well, that you have uncovered there, it really is... The trouble with most things is....there are people whom have clever people of law, who could probably get them much less than 5 years if they wanted to pay the fee's and so on....If they wanted to get out of the marriage... Taking a look at the other side, of the coin as they say.. Engagements, are not a thing one hears much about these days... It needs someone, very enterprising, to introduce,all the good things about getting engaged.. having a long engagement..was always seen as, a getting to know you thing... Many years ago, with intimate relations..kept after the wedding vows had been taken. It needs someone to somehow reintroduce..some things of past times.. Wonder if one could try to bring back some of the beliefs, they had many years ago.. And work out 'why'? they worked at the time... Then to try and make people, aware of them, and try to make them stand up and work for today, as well in yesteryear...... Would that really work I wonder..?! Would people want to turn the clock back...?! Wouldn't it really be too hard to do so..I wonder... A lot of the kids..are just plain 'Bored'..parent's,, seemingly let them get on with things from such a young age now....With hardly any family intake.... What would have to be done is a mixture of the years, a chunk out of that era.. and a bit out of another............Do you think it would work?..... I really think the family unit, should somehow be introduced again... But though all these years.. generation to generation.. they each have their own ideas.. And for most generation's...Things just sort of happen, don't they.. If you wanted to do as you mentioned.... I think it might be too difficult..I would really love to think , that at some stage the close family unit, would actually reappear, but the Public, would almost have to start living in an entirely new way..[or should it be..old way?????] Sorry I am all out of ideas now... Is it possible to somehow put the clock back and copy another era's way of living..? Wouldn't it all seem, too 'Manipulated', somehow!? Yesteryear, had so much more going for it...So much more respect, for people, and manners too were just like a second skin.. Things like standing up for needy people to sit down on a bus..thats a very lightweight thing I know.. but things like that... I think parents used to accept that it was their child.. therefore they would do all they could to teach it about life, and the ways of living.. Good manner's.. and how to treat people... that has seemed to slipped away, I know the era's come and era's go..but while one is living through an era...One always thinks.. that life will always be that way... When I was a child, there was definitely, very close family units, with relatives living short distances from each other... In the years I am talking about..part of travel that was popular then.. was the moterbike and sidecar....My mum and dad, had one, so did a few uncle's and aunts..It made a good form of travel. Most kids loved sitting in the sidecar, one could either sit upright..[depending on the size of the child...... or it was quite long, and we usually had a couple of rugs and a pillow.that was a wonderful ride.. and sent most to sleep in no time at all...It had a movement which was sort of rocking.. which did sort of lull one to sleep very well...Most familys if they had one,,the dog would also travel in the side car, as it loved making itself comfortable.. in the long side car.. We only lived about half an hour or so from each other for many years.... Thats the way there was so many close knit families, around when I was small.. because it was the beginning of a new life.. world war 2 had finished then.. I was only a baby then but when I grew up mum used to tell us family stories all about the war and such.. I really think it was a good time to be born.. I wouldn't have missed being in a close knit family for anything... It makes me feel so sad..now when I look at kids....There just doesn't seem the respect that there was when I was young... But as I said..Mums and dads, took a real interest at everything their child was doing and used to encourage them all they could.... I worry about the children of 'now' at times..Where are the children..heading to or going to..? With families all split up,and spread across the world at times... How are the kids of today going to manage... We used to go to one relatives one sunday,and have high tea with them.. another Sunday some other family would cometo us and so on... We used to have a wonderful time.....It did help that mostly all of our natures were a lot the same.. and we used to go and have games of cricket..and ball...and picnics galore.. Can you try and turn the clock back..???!!??? I am not really sure!

Hello Willow.. I don't get a ringing in the ears, but every so many months... I get a ticking.. 'Tick! tick! Tick!' Honest its just like someone is holding their watch up to my ear...Goes quite fast too.. Be interesting to find out what other people hear in their ears.. Of course there is that illness , where some people get all kinds of sound in either one ear or both..have just looked in the Dictionary..and can't find it at all...Some people have it for years.. can't spell it..think itbegins with tin...? but as I cannot find it in the dictionary..knowing me..could star with a z or something.. I read about a young man in his twenties..he had been to music school, and studied the Classical guitar.. He had passed lots of tests..and was good enough to give concerts around his home town...He was so pleased all was going very well...But it seemed all of a sudden the noises in his ears grew louder.. so much so he couldn't tune his guitar.. So with great sorrow he had to give it up... That was quite a few years ago now, he would be considered quite young even now.. So Peraps Medical knowledge might grow even more, and they might find some sort of cure for it.. It was said that during the day , it sometimes really used to make him feel down.... it just couldn't stop the noise it never stopped.. the only thing it did stop, was the start, of what might have been a very good job, in the classical music business.... Poor Lad lets hope that he may have found something to help his ears.....now.. interesting subject.. Thanks Willow.... From message X+

I am the bread of life. he who comes to Me, Will never go hungry, and he who believes in me will never be thirsty. Amen. John. 6:35 Welcome simile.. Pleased to meet you.. So sorry, that your life has turned all upside down, and inside out.. The Greatest Person, I know, who can turn you rightside in again..and around the right way..is Jesus..Amen.. I like others have been through many dark tunnels...and have learnt.. That Every tunnel.. not only has an Entrance..it also somewhere along the line..does have an Exit too..Honest!! It's true.. HALLELUJAH!! Nice to meet you brother.. Please feel free, to email me via Worthy, at any time..and I will do my very best, to send you some comfort.. Just think if you get in touch with all that has offered their help.. You should feel a lot better, that when you started your post to us..anyway.. Take much care.. You will be in all our thoughts and prayers... You have a lot of new friends now too.. As each of us suddenly finds.. When we first post.. Amen to that... May You Find The True Light, Forever On Your Pathway.. Much Love To Your Family.. From messageX+ **************** I will leave some Positive things from the Good Book.. for you below this.. from messageX+ God Bless You! ************* Cast all your anxiety on him because He cares for you. 1 Peter 5:7 ********************* The Lord watches over you- the Lord is your shade at your right hand. The Lord will keep you from all harm- He will watch over your coming and going, both now forever more. Psalm 121:5. 7-8 ******************** I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you. Isaiah 51: 12, 15. ********************* You have been a refuge for the poor, a refuge for the needy in his distress, a shelter from the storm, and a shade from the heat. Isaiah : 25:4 ********************** The Lord is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. Psalm 9: 9. ****************** May the light of Jesus, Shine brightly on your path.. Amen.. Love From messageX+ *********************** The Lord is My Shepherd.. Psalm 23...

AMEN!! Isn't He wonderful!

:emit-highfive: Hi! Jinni.. Please forgive me everyone.. but I just had to say something.. I am very sure that with this SOOO! encouraging post.. lots of Mums will see it..and be encouraged..by it in some way.. Especially when you are telling How Wonderfully.. they are now doing as men with their own families to look after.. WOW! aS THEY SAY.....' Actions Speak Louder Than Words..' Well done that Mum, Well Done!!! And to the lady that started this thread.. As I was reading it.. Very Well Done to you Dear One.. I do not think anyone could have done any better than you, I really don't.. We all have times of fear and great doubt , with the things, sometimes.. we wouldn't be human beings if we didn't would we.. But I really think you were really on track, with how you were managing things.. and it looked like that lady was slowely following you..Sitting down having coffee together,,WOW! Carry on, the way U are.. Sincere and heartfelt wishes and feelings.. Well they are really the best..And thats the answer to it all..Just do your very best..Jesus put you right where you are needed, Dear One.. Do you know what..I have a post card..stuck up on the wall in front of the computer..I bought it in our local Christian book-shop..Maybe if you haven't seen one like this.. you could copy out what I will tell you.. and perhaps one day.. just doodle away with it.. and make it into a great pretty thing.. which has a very strong message,, It looks like this.. it is post-card size.. and it has four box'es going right along the top.. and counting those, it has four downwards on the side's and four along the bottom.. which leaves a square in the middle.. Now in, all the boxes, it says the same thing.. which is right along the top of each box..are the letters ..W W J D and at the bottom of each box is the answer in all, about the post card.. W W J D.........WHAT WOULD JESUS do? Actually.. Just Do What You Were Doing.. Which Was.............. Just Follow Your Instinct..... And Do What Jesus Would DO.......... As I read your post I was nodding to myself..And agreeing with all you said.. Don't you ever doubt those very Wise and Heartfelt Sincere Wishes.. You Cannot build Rome in a day..a saying goes.. Perhaps this lady never knew her Mum.. Do you ever watch Monkey World.?. Wel,l if the Monkeys that have been rescued... have seen their Mum, with a baby monkey a brother or sister.. Even though their Mum was probably killed while that chimp.. was very small.......... It still has partly the instinct.. to know what to do.. But if it never knew its mum.. then the poor dear has to struggle around.. not knowing what on earth is happening to it.. In such pain.. I love that programme..The programme shows, with the ones that never knew their mum..to give birth..and to clean the baby chimp up.. And then what happens.. within a day..we see the Mum just keep putting it down on the straw and often walking away from it... Does that help at all..Monkeys are so like us.. and I think are only 1 cromerson (? can't spell.. And nowhere in the dictionary can I find it.. must have dropped out when I wasn't looking.. HA! HA! LOL!.......... 1 Cromerson....[whatever that is?] I less than we have got.. thats their brain power... So think we can see.. by what I have said.. they are quite like us.. Therefore..if the lady who is finding it had to do things.. Perhaps she didn't have anything to do with her Mum, for some reason.. Or it could be that There is a sorta weakness running inall the Mums, in that family.. So perhaps, they do not teach at the time they should.. just by letting a child watch what she is doing..?! Don't know if that makes any sense.....But there is a good point there if you study long enough...You are all clever ladies there..I am sure you can see what I mean.. I know I get things in a muddle at times.. thats whats left over from being so ill, but the last couple of months, my mind is starting to clear..HALLELUJAH!! I do hope that will help you dear lady.. sorry I have forggoten your name..[ short memory..] But I think you were both so good and right too... If the lady who started this thread and carries on as she thinks.. then she really will surprise the childrens Mum.. when they all come home with really good jobs like our other friend here..Well done to you both...Gold Star Each... Gold Star to you both.. Just keep on doing your best.. You can't lose.. you are on the right track... Well done.. 100/100... Love you both.. From messageX+

Hello jimi.. My goodness what a distressing situation for you all to be in.. What a shame when your husbands cousin tried to look at him, your husband didn't think, to go around the bed to see him face to face..[its so easy with hindsight, isn't it..and without your emotions too..] I was wondering if you could go and see him again as very soon as possible, perhaps he was trying to say something to him..perhaps you could ask a nurse , or a member of staff when you go to see him next.. if they would come and stand with you the same side face to face.. so they could just be a witnessd to anything he may try to say.. Poor boy..he can probably..hear everything thats going on too..[the hearing is the last to go they say.. look at people whom have been in comas and such and the voices have helped bring them out of their sleep..] When I lost my Mum,The nurse afterwards sid that she would have heard everything I'd said to her.. I was there for 5 hours.. Just talking and thanking her for lovely things she did..and we had such happy times too ..so I do know that is true about the hearing bit. I do honestly urge you to go to the hospital as quickly as possible.. to see the young man.. and to also talk to some important member of staff too.. Perhaps the great shock of finding him so ill has remained with the aunt and uncle.. and turned their mind a bit..I do not think that they are thinking straight..I really don't.. I have been in hospital a few time when I had my breakdown..a few years ago.. one does learn a lot from others and of course personally ones self.. I should go to the hospital as soon as possible I really would.. I think the others are still in shock, which plays tricks on peoples minds.. especially to suddenly find him so ill..and also having his heart stop.. then he was alright.. Youn do not want the worst happening do you.. then have to live with the thought of things you might have done.. you seem a very sincere lady.. I think it may be only you two that could save this cousins life..not only by praying..but by trying hard to explain it all to the staff.. you two and probably the cousin.. seem the only two whom are alert to all this.. the other two seem in such deep shock, really do not think, that they know what they are doing.. I could put more.. but want to post this to you... I will be praying that the Lord will intervene.. and the man will still be fed by tube.. my goodnes they should still be giving him food.. to strengthen him.. This has saddened me..because it is sad.. I would try and talk to the aunt and uncle..after you have hopefully seen the cousin.. and got some staff to realise what is going on.. if not what about calling the police..? Well a mans life is at stake.. Well it just a thought..I am in the U.K. so do not know much about your procedure's.. I am an honest person..I looked after my Mum and Dad..during their last years at home.. Dad had Cancer and Mum had senile dementure.. I looked after them for about 9 1/2 years.. Please trust me.. could you let me know what happens.. you could email me though Worthy boards..My screen name Is message.. God Bless you all.. and the man whom is so ill.. All my Love and sincere Wishes, Love From messageX+ God Bless

Hello all.. I really think some of the people here, really should try to re-read the post, that we had in the first place.. Just though I would copy out the main bit, which everyone seems to not be SEEING..here goes.. ************************************************************************* If a couple were to seperate to work on their marriage [in a sense start over] And they decided that they were going to make their marriage work:::::::::::::: :::::::::::::[Here comes the important bit...]::::::::::::::: And they went out on dates or whatnot....would it be wrong of them to sleep together, since they are still married to each other....::::::::::::::::::::: *************************************************************************** If they are so intent in making their marriage work again.... If they are that in love with each other..... Why? are they still going on other dates..? Why do they want to date others anyway? If they are interested in others..why are they so called trying to save their marriage.. And why do they want to go to bed with each other?.. If they are still seeing others too.. Sounds to me that they need a total rethink.. The answer surely is obvious.. if they are living apart, and yet still dating others.. Then I do not think that their reality, for each other is as true as they think it is.. Perhaps its the fear of the unknown.. the fear of not having anyone..when they are still legally married? And perhaps they want their cake and eat it.. Either you are loyal to someone..!! Or you are not.. It is just one, or the other! This is the bit somehow people have been missing..The devils work you know!! cover us all in the Blood of the lamb, in the name of Jesus Christ..AMEN HALLELUJAH!! LOVE MESSAGE X+

Hello all.. I really think some of the people here, really should try to re-read the post, that we had in the first place.. Just though I would copy out the main bit, which everyone seems to not be SEEING..here goes.. ************************************************************************* If a couple were to seperate to work on their marriage [in a sense start over] And they decided that they were going to make their marriage work:::::::::::::: :::::::::::::[Here comes the important bit...]::::::::::::::: And they went out on dates or whatnot....would it be wrong of them to sleep together, since they are still married to each other....::::::::::::::::::::: *************************************************************************** If they are so intent in making their marriage work again.... If they are that in love with each other..... Why? are they still going on other dates..? Why do they want to date others anyway? If they are interested in others..why are they so called trying to save their marriage.. And why do they want to go to bed with each other?.. If they are still seeing others too.. Sounds to me that they need a total rethink.. The answer surely is obvious.. if they are living apart, and yet still dating others.. Then I do not think that their reality, for each other is as true as they think it is.. Perhaps its the fear of the unknown.. the fear of not having anyone..when they are still legally married? And perhaps they want their cake and eat it.. Either you are loyal to someone..!! Or you are not.. It is just one, or the other! This is the bit somehow people have been missing..The devils work you know!! cover us all in the Blood of the lamb, in the name of Jesus Christ..AMEN HALLELUJAH!! LOVE MESSAGE X+

Hi! Lossforwords.. I have just read your posting to MaCajunboy, after posting to them my self.. I was so very saddened, to hear of your great loss, over the Christmas holidays... Yes I am so very sorry for you.. But I enjoyed reading about your great relationship, with them... I really love reading about grandparents... As I can hardly remember my own.. You are naturally, worried about your Grandfather..and where he is now.. I feel very led , to write this to you.. Just remember...All Love comes from God..He is a God of Love.. And I am also very sure, that He is also a God of Great Mercy too.. Especially, with one so ill, as your Grandfather was... As printed in a little booklet I have.. [i'm not really shouting at you, honest!] THE LORD IS MERCIFUL AND GRACIOUS, Slow to anger, And plenteous in mercy.. Psalm 103. Verse 8.. *********************************** I WILL STRENGTHEN THEE; Yea, I will help thee; Yea, I will uphold thee with The right hand of my Righteousness.......Amen.. Isaiah Chapter 41: verse 10. *************************** The Lord Jesus Christ said, LET NOT YOUR HEART BE TROUBLED: ye believe in God, Believe also in Me. Peace I leave with you, MY PEACE I GIVE UNTO YOU: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. LET NOT YOUR HEART BE TROUBLED, neither let it be afraid. John: chapter 14: Verses 1, 27. ******************************* Just put ALL your Faith and Trust,into the Lords very loving hands.. I do not think, you will ever regret doing so.... May God Calm The Storm Within You.... And Give You His Peace...Amen.. Love From message X+

Hi! MeCajunboy... It must have taken a lot of pain, to write out how you feel.. Thank you!.. It does make it a little bit easier, to know how to answer you.... I lost my Mum, just over eight years ago now.. We were always very close , as it sounds like you were with your Mum.. I always put a capital letter, at the start of that word..also with Dad... Well to me, having such Golden ones..They were real Special people.. And a great honour not only to know them, but to have the honour of being their daughter too... I lost my Dad, four years before my Mum died... Now I will try very hard, to answer your question...here goes.. Well of course, we are all different..and react..so vastly, from one another.. But I will tell you how I have found it.. When I lost Mum....it was as if the world closed in on me.. Like the sun had hidden away behind the clouds..perhaps never, to be seen again.. An end of an Era.. Because my Mum, was the last part of the main relatives.. That we were oh! so close to...We had a run of Cancer in our family.. So when Mum left.... I just cried and cried...As is usually, at the start of loss... It is peculiar, the things that begin to hurt.. Like, my mum,used to go to a day centre..slowely and slowely, she went more days..so in the end she was going 6 days a week.. So when it was nearing the time, that would have been her being brought home, from the day centre...I made sure that I was out..usually around the shops... It upset me greatly..so much so, that I used to go in the library..in the end.. and stay there until they shut..which was about two hours after, she would have usually been home. I had a hard job keeping the tears away..and used to hide behind a book.. walking home..I just used to cry , not bothered that anyone saw me either.. Yes it is hard..Very hard.. and after, these eight years or so... I have found..that I still miss her just as much as that first day.. And there are times, when I still shed tears too.... It hurts yes it hurts..deep deep down.. it will always hurt... It is the most natural reaction to have.. When one has been, soooooo! very close to someone.. Whom one loved with all ones heart.. Time is a greater healer..But it will never cure broken hearts though..And I think the main reason for that is.. that the Lord, allows the scars to remain..so that through them, we are able to comfort others whom too.. have had their hearts broken as well... I mean to say.. if the scars healed about any thing that we have gone through..how on earth to could we know , 'just how to', reach out and try and comfort anothers sorrows.. we just wouldn't know where to start would we..And Worthy Boards wouldn't be here either.. because if we had any posts in.. we just wouldn't know the 'HOW TO', would we.. Praise God for scars, Is what I say..I have been able to reach out and grab so many peoples hands and sit and listen to them..and hopefully comfort them..and write them letters afterwards.. sometimes too.. Well if scars healed up..Then we wouldn't have had the chance to meet would we.. and this bit of paper.. would just be blank.. with my name at the bottom wouldn't it.. Thats why we still hurt I think..We will always miss that person..But I think the utter sadful yearning, for them.. slowely little by little goes away..It can come back yes.. But some days will be better than others..and as we, slowely acclimatize, ourselves to the new order of life.... We will very slowely find ourselves..Accepting, 'THE NOW', of things, adapting and adjusting, and for some of us.. we might find that time will bring true adjustment..to our lives.. whose to know? ' I don't know what the future holds, But I know who holds the future.. Amen... But the thing that I have found is.. Time heals--the--great--big--zipping--through-- you--pain, which gets at you, and makes one feel, that one couldn't possible, live very long with that sort of tearing pain.. It feels like it is shredding one, into little tiny pieces.... Oh! No!! I can't bear it, this emotion this pain..It's far too much.. And of course it is...Too Much!! The one thing that upsets me.. Is when you read about people, having lost someone close, whom they shared a home with.... And probably, within about 6 months to a year, onwards.. They not only have thrown or given everything away..that reminded them of the person..........But have actually Moved right away too!! Horror of Horrors.... If only they had not been so hasty..if only they had waited a little while longer... before they did what they did.. What they have been through, is part of the mourning process.... But the strange thing is....The things that remind you of that person.. Those Very things..that you just cannot bear, to even look at, at the moment.. Because of the searing pain..and memories...that come and hit your heart so painfully.. Will, in a certian length of time..and lengths of time are different for everyone.. But those things that you couldn't bear to look at then..because the sadness that they brought to you.....Those Very things..when one has got over the great shock of now living with this huge black gap in your life now..Which has no-one living, in that gap.. Those very things.. in time..Not only will bring one, great great comfort.. That you still have them in your life with you...that that person, you lost, also loved, those things so very much too..and so did you, will in time..Fill your life with a great gentle sweetness, and gentleness..And in some way one will still be able to share them, with that person..too! Some times, there can be a bitter-sweet, about them..but more..they will reassure comfort,and be a great joy in your life, after all.. And if they moved away.. then all, of the people you knew together..will be gone.. Even down to the friendly postman..or people who owned the shops you buy from.. I can think of anything, more..disastrous.. I really couldn't.. You ask, very kindly.. that whoever writes to you.. mention their lost loved ones so you could pray for them..How kind of you.............. The only thing is my list would be rather long.. As God knows all things...Could you please mention my name..message.. God knows all names..He will know who you mean..if you could just ask that he look after my lost loves..in the way you mentioned.. It really would be a great Blessing to me..To have someone else do that very thing for me..In fact I really couldn't think of any thing nicer..to ask of anyone.. May god Bless you for your Sincere words of Prayer.. I have long been thanking the Lord.. for all my losses.in whatever way theymay have come..With that Holy Hindsight He blesses us with.. It has all turned about and made me, So Much Richer In Jesus.. I would like to leave you with three texts, that have have lived in my heart , and brought much comfort to me too.. As following.... We know that trouble produces endurance, Endurance brings God's approval, And His approval creates hope. This hope does not disappoint us, for God has poured out His love into our hearts, by means of the Holy Spirit, Who is Gods gift to us....... Romans 5:verses 3 1/2--5. ************************ 'My grace is all you need, for my power is greatest when you are weak.' I am most happy, then, to be proud of my weaknesses, in order to feel the protection of Christ's power over me. I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions,and difficulties for christs sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong..Amen.. 2 Corinthians chapter 12:Verses 9--10.. ************************************************ Let us give thanks to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the meciful Father, The God from whom all help comes! He helps us in all our troubles, so that we are able to help others who have all kinds of troubles, using the same-help that we ourselves have received from God.....Amen.. 2 Corinthians: chapter 1: Verses 3--4. *********************************************** Thank you for writing, MeCajunboy.. I do hope something I have written, may have helped you in your Grief... May every day, bring a lighter daylight, for you to tread through... Never be afraid of the shadows... 'Tis only the Lord, Blessing you, with His love, Of a silver lining... May God Bless your pathway, With the oil of joy. Amen.. Much Love , From message X+

Pray don't find fault with the manwho limps Or stumbles along the road, Unless you have worn the shoes he wears or struggled beneath his load. There may be tacks in his shoes that hurt, Though hidden away from view, Or the burden he bears, placed on your back, Might cause you to stumble, too. ******** Don't sneer at the man who is down today, Unless you have felt the blow That caused his fall, or felt the shame That only the fallen know. You may be strong, but still the blows That were his, if dealt to you In the self same way at the self same time, Might cause you to stagger, too. ********** Don't be too harsh with the man who sins, Or pelt him with words or stones, Unless you are sure, yea, doubly sure, That you have no sins of your own. For you know, perhaps, if the tempters voice Should whisper as soft to you As it did to him when he went astray 'Twould cause you to falter, too. By Franc Knighton

Hi! Tari.. Thanks so much for answering my post..For your kindness and compassion.. Yes, thanks I do feel a lot better, than I did, eight years ago...Anyway!! it has been a long long struggle though.. Great lack of concentration... And also a very short memory..too..which really messes most things up, like hearing, thinking, speaking..Just wish my Brain and mouth would get on better with each other..And somehow? Find out, how to be able, to really Synchronize their watches together... Might be able to get more than one thing, done at a time then...LOL! Ha! Ha!!! Mind you, The dear Lord Jesus..somehow helped me slowely to Accept my crosses... And now, with much Hindsight..I can really say, I am Really Blessed with Heavenly Riches that were not mine to have , before I was so ill eight years ago.. In the times, I was born...Humour ruled O.K. But I am sorry to say.. that tears were not really much of the scene then.. Mostly I think cause, Doc's and that, didn't really know much about OUR Emotional Working's then..Unfortunatly... I remember my Mum, saying once..[Just as I was going to burst into tears, too..] She, suddenly remarked..'Oh please don't get upset, I don't like to see you cry.' So of course the old flood gates...Screamingly came to a halt...goodness knows how long that had to wait to come out another time..It just wasn't known about, how healthy, tears and a good howl, were for you then.. Never mind, life is a learning process,isn't it.. Full of hurdles, big and small, to get over, one way or another... I call them, 'My Adventure's'.. Well it's what they are really..if one can look at them in an Optimistic way......that is..Iv'e always been an Opitimist..its a great way to live.. Mind you, I have often groaned in humour, at myself.. Thinking its really an ironic thing.. An Optimist--With Depression....LOL! doesn't sound quite right somehow does it!!! I tell you one thing that has really helped me, helped my concentration really a lot.. And that is, someone, mentioned to me, about getting a Computer??!!... Good thing they were a friend.. So we both laughed together.. when I said.. I don't know here I am, can't put two words together..let alone talk in a straight line..and you are saying, I should get a computer.... I'm in my middle years , and have never even begun to think, that I should get a computer.............!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Let alone learning how to work one.. SO I DID!!!! Boy it was hard..but I have Determination..and always a lot of Patience.. I won't go into it at all now... But, here I am about four years later.. Having mastered a little more, [ Just a bit more..] than just the basic skills.. I think it is wonderful, and often find myself when on line, looking at the screen.. In utter Wonderment..Just trying to think of the many many too many to say..who added their little bit of skill..To what now has become the Internet......I find it all, really Mind Boggling Stuff, I really do...Thrilling stuff , at that.... So while we had plenty of humour and goodwill and compassion towards one another... Bit like the Walton's... I know some people say that is not true to life.. Probably because they have not known such relationships.... But if like |I did, you had known such a close knit family..then watching the Waltons..was a great reminder of how things were, growing up in those days.. Make it almost sound like Pre-Victorian, don't I..Not Quite!!... Anyway thanks again Tari.for your email Nice to talk to you... Thanks again... May Life Treat You Well.. From message x+

Hi! 'blessed 2'... Thank you for your post... it said it all..... The Greatest of These is Love.... Thank you so much dear Brother..... I do understand, your feelings concerning, your feelings towards others..yes.. But I think that is part of life, that at sometime or other, we have all, had to go through... Perhaps it is a not wanting to hurt anyone's feelings.. Or sadden anyone, more than they are already... The only thing is.. that Wisdom and Empathy.. Are maybe, things usually given to us with Age.. And dare I say, a spot of suffering too.. [be careful what you pray, for yourself.] And don't forget, that one never stops learning...and thats great,might be a bit dull if we didn't.. I know how you feel though..... I seem to be reaping, from what experiances I have been through in life lately. I have really noticed that, since coming to Worthy Boards... And have been so glad, that at times, I could perhaps, find a comforting word or two, for someone... Somehow like a famous Painter..and his Swan song..[No I am not over 100, honest..] If it's any help..I was some blue moons ago, a very shy person.. In my twenties, even then.. Though people, somehow took longer to grow up then.. These days, you can find almost anything on T.V. While I was growing up..it just wasn't like that.. It was more innocent..and took much longer, to find out the ways of the world... So all I can say, is never stop believing in yourself.. I mean, look at what a great post you just made.. This thread has run into pages now.. As people tried to work it out.. But the one thing to try and remember is.. The Greatest of these is Love.....So you did a good post .. Do not EVER, stop believing in yourself.. Age really gives experiance... Don't forget at the time it happens, experiance,is quite often at the time really unwanted, it is only with much hindsight.. Does the Lord, sometimes let you see how His Holy Hand, has been traveling through it all.. The Black threads may be MORE Meaningful than the Gold, after all....... Hope this helped just a tiny bit anyway.. Nice to talk to you 'Blessed 2'.. Sisterly Christian Love, From message X+

DON'T JUDGE TOO HARD. ************************ Pray don't find fault with the man who limps Or stumbles along the road, Unless you have worn the shoes he wears Or struggled beneath his load... There may be tacks in his shoes that hurt, Though hidden away from view, Or the burden he bears, placed on your back, Might cause you to stumble, too. ************************** Don't sneer at the man who is down today, Unless you have felt the blow That caused his fall, or felt the shame that only the fallen know. You may be strong, but still the blows That were his, if dealt to you In the self same way at the self same time, Might cause you to stagger too. *************************** Don't be too harsh with the man who sins, Or pelt him with words or stones, Unless you are sure, yea, doubly sure, That you have not sin's of your own. For you know, perhaps, if the tempter's voice Should whisper as soft to you As it did to him when he went astray 'Twould cause you to falter, too.. By Franc Knighton. **************************** I Love You All At Worthy Boards, Truly.. May God Bless Each And Every One of You. May The Good Shepherd, Be With You All.. And Guide You Along The Narrow Way, Always.. May You Feel His Peace, And Live In His Love... Holy Greeting's From message X+ *****************************

Hi! nebula.... Thanks for answering my post.... I wrote it, in, more or less short sentances, because otherwise I cannot write notes..I have only just found out, that it is possible for me to write a shortened version, in this way..Praise The Lord Amen..And I do..Often... Of course many details would have been left out..but still, I hope it is understandable to a point, that is.. Bless you nebula..for your concern about me................... Let me just say, it has been well over 6 years,since I last tried to self distruct.... A doctor changed my pills..and I am now on the highest..you can go on these certain ones.. They break up circles of bad thoughts..which is what had happened.... Think I put somewhere on another post..That I had starved my self for a year almost..and when I went into hospital..I had lost over 4 1/2 stone in weight in a year.... I really just wanted to disappear..again, nothing about to die or death.. Being so underweight.. meant that my brain was not getting the nourishment.. that it so needed.. therefore I had no substance to fight things, back with, at all.. One of the Doctors..[i saw quite a few.. they were worried about me..] Although one, of the Community Physicatric Nurses.. that used to come and see me during the week..Told me that there is a word to describe what I did.. As there are others whom have done the same ..WHEW! nice to know one is not alone isn't it.. It's called Para--Suicidal,.It's always good to have a title against whatever it is isn't it.. As for the voices, they were coming from me..and were part of my despair to myself.. After reading a lot of the posts...I really felt, that I had to put people straight.. and tell them ,'Hey! wait a moment..It really is an ILLNESS you know'.. Ones body, can get very sick, as we all know..Why do people get stuck, when ones head gets sick? I think perhaps because it has a 'Stigma' Attached.. Some times I blame films.. I know that they are trying to show us the truth..about so called Mental Hospital's........ did you ever see the film,'THE NUN'S STORY? with Audrey Hepburn..[My Favourite Actress.] As part of her studies,she had to go and help the Patients.. in a so called 'Mad House'..have baths.. and when you saw these patients..being bathed, which was taken from how things used to be.,.they were in these long baths..the Baths had tops on them, so they couldn't get out..Goodness knows how long they were left in these baths.. Then in another scene..she had to go and get a patient to have a bath, and ended up have a toussel with her..I am sure that its things like that, which stick in the publics mind... It is slowley, I think getting better acceptance...But it will take its time like everything else.. thanks for you concern and compassion nebula.... Nice to talk to you... I just hope that it has given people some more understanding, of what this iLLness is really like... May life treat you well... God Bless You, From message X+

I have read all the posts on this subject.. I knew someone.. Who was very ill with Depression... [so I thought, that if I made this post , it just might help you make up your mind about this subject.. Or maybe it won't???] Their Depression had a name..It was called DESPAIR.... A really dreadful thing to suffer with.. [it's an ILLNESS an Illness, O.K...It's an Illness,shall we get that straight.. Like every other Illness.. It comes.. Under that same title, of all the others..And like all the other Illnesses, it just settles on to a person..It's Not Invitied,and it is most Unwelcome too...] However, my friend, became even lower than ever.. They kept going down a lot lower, than the basement, in the Human Mind.. In fact they told me..That they reached a place, that they didn't know, even existed in their own mind.. And in doing so, this illness, of Depression, called Despair, got worse... Until, it had another name ALSO.. The other name was, Suicidal Depression.. They became so ill, they had voices, in their head, for ages and ages.. Two of the voices, were always in disagreement, with each other... The third voice was always chanting to itself.. 'I want to live, I want to die... I want to die, I want to live.. I want to live , I want to die.. and so on and so on, and so on...and so on, and on and on and on and on ,on, on, on, and so on.. My friend really lost mental balance.. In their saner moments, they really did not know, if they wanted to live or die..Anyway! Because their mind, was really split in two..And half wanted to live and half wanted to die.. It was the type of Depression they had...That caused them to be like that.. They had Nightmares..When they were able to sleep..And during the day..it didn't stop, my friend called them Daymares..Just to sort of, give them some sort of seperation..To somehow give their mind, some sort of relief...As they became in such an, Awful Horrible State.. My friend, had this strange scenario, that wasn't in their mind one day, but the next day it was.. It was like, they had suddenly been given a script.. It was like ALL people had been given a part, in this Important Play.. And it was like, If they, didn't take part, then it would ruin everything...Especially RUIN the Play... The play, had a strong plot.. it was all about Escaping.. Nothing at all. Was about, anyone going to die..Or about Death itself.. It really was just about Escaping..that and that alone.. And all they knew, was that 'the PLAY'..was Ultra, Ultra, Important........... And when it was near the time of, 'The Play'.. A Compulsion Grew, and Grew and Grew....In fact it's power was so Strong..It was just not Possible, to not Obey it, at all.. When it was time for my friend, to Play her part, in this Play..... Their part, had to take a lot of pills, lots and lots of them....Which made them feel even worse than ever..But it was Their Part in the play.. After all it was about Escaping.. which my friend longed to do.. Especially now that they felt so ill.... To escape that was their part , and they, didn't want to spoil it for all the others appearing in the Play with them.. Reality, had Long since left them...By the time they had to take the pills.. It Was as though..Every single thought about 'real life', had been wiped from their mind..all that was in their mind was... Their Part in the Play , and not spoiling it for the others..and the Main bit, which was Escaping.. My friend went through this Vile, Scenario, again and again and again and more.. It was just the Part in the Play that mattered.. They almost died countless times.. Then one day, after they had yet again rang the Samaritins, for their help..and yet again after a while had the ambulance, come to pick them up.. Something was different about this day.. They became unconscious, in the Ambulance.. and from sitting next to the Ambulance man, in the back..the Ambulance had to stop and my friend was laid down on the bunk.. The Ambulance had to stop three or four times, because no heartbeat could be heard.. My friend, told me that they reached such a wonderful Peacefulness..and they was in this tunnel...And the sweetest peacefulness, they had ever know , came over them again and again..So sweet...and Such Utter Peace.................................. ************ I have written this because I felt it may help a lot of people, whom perhaps had lost someone they were close to, in this way.. Perhaps they felt it was their fault, that this had happened.. Please let me assure you that, it was nothing to do with you.. In that persons mind, was one thing and one thing only Escape.. Of course, this is my friends story..I do not know how others storries would go.. But the one thing I am sure of..is that they too would have been offered some sort of script to Play out..and that they too would have gone through the very powerful feelings described here....... One thing I am sure of, is that no-one could do this sort of self-destruction to themselves.. in cold-blood.. it would be totally impossible..But then the compulsions let it become possible..The power of them and the strong Part you have in the script.. I am almost sure that death and dying has not got anything to do with it..the keyword is, Escape..... TO ESCAPE! ********** This is the real truth written here.... My Friend has always been my Friend....My Best Friend.... We are as ONE.. For this is the only way we could be... It's quite simple you see.. My best Friend, and I are as one... I am My Best friend, And my best friend is Me.. YES! IT'S ME.. I JUST WANTED TO TRY AND EXPLAIN SOME OF IT.. ALL IS TRUE...AMEN I JUST WANTED TO EXPLAIN..AND PERHAPS COMFORT SOMEONE.. God Brought Me back 16 times...And He Never Left My Side.. AMEN... from message X+

HI! delilah, What a lovely post you put..Thank you so much..I was feeling a bit down.. Came on here, and what did I see first thing, your Wonderful post.. You are are very thoughtful delilah, as you can see your remarks , also made my curser, Very Happy! too.. Thanks for you great 'HUG'! of words, Your Hug, really cheered me up.. May I through, the smilies above..give you a hug back.. There you are,Consider Yourself Hugged Back!!.. delilah!! Bless you.. Two may talk together under the same roof, for many years, yet never really meet; and two others at first speech are old friends. By --Mary Catherwood.. Would you consider being an Old Friend to me?! delilah... Of course it would have to be an on line friend, as I am in England.. Next time you happen to feel a bit low, email me and I will do my best to cheer you up as you have me now! Praise the Lord Amen... Thanks again.. From message X+

Hi! Daughterofking, Well I will tell you this,VERY TRUE! story about myself........... Here goes then.... I started work, In a London Office, when I was 15 yrs old.. A couple of days after I had started..A girl was coming around with a small box.. We said hello, then she said..'It's alright I know you have just started here..I won't ask you, as you do not know the person'.. I got even more curious then..and said, 'Well why are you collecting for her?'.. She said, 'Well, it's her Birthday tomorrow'.. So I said, 'Oh yes, if you can just point her out to me,then I will know who she is.. She did..And I said, 'She has been talking to me today, yes I will put something in the box for her..And I did.... And just as an afterthought..I asked the collecting person..'Well, how old will she be?' 'The collector said, 'Twenty'.................. I was in a bit of a daze the rest of the day...I wasn't really quite sure why?! ... When I got home, that evening... I was sitting down, and Mum came up to me, and said, Are you alright?' 'Yes why', I said. Mum said, 'Well you look a bit flushed thats all'.. Suddenly, I remembered the collection at work..... 'Mum, I've got something to tell you'.. 'Whats that?' said Mum.. 'Well,they had a collection for someone at work today, as it's her Birthday tomorrow'. 'Yes'. said Mum.. 'But Mum.' I said..'Shes going to be twenty Mum, Twenty, I never want to be Twenty Mum.' It was very peculiar then..As my Mum, threw back her head and laughed.. I didn't know why.. [This was multi multi, years ago though..we were not so much of the world as kids today..] Mind you, when I next saw my Aunt and Cousin..They started joking with me.. 'Whats this,' said my Aunt, 'About you never wanting to be Twenty!' So that became , one of the family jokes for many years..and other things.. that I said when starting to find my way in the world...I also when I got older joined in with their laughter, very much..................... And lots of times now, I have often thought,'I wish I was Twenty again!!' You can't win, can you!! LOL!!!! Much Love, From message X+