How do I get a tender heart again (unharden heart)?

[Biscuit]

Biscuit, it is sounding like you might have an endocrine imbalance? Perhaps do a search on hypothyroidism and see if you express the symptoms listed? Or something like that? I know low thyroid can result in depression feelings, or lack there-of.

I wish it was something that easy. I feel that God is revealing to me that my heart is very hard. I am not in touch with my emotions and cannot figure out why. I don't know if it is due to unforgiveness, bitterness, or what. And toward whom. Am I unforgiving toward God? Toward my deceased spouse? Deceased mother? Someone else? I can't shed a tear. I play my audio Bible at night and just woke up to Romans 2:5-8 (not the first time). I can pray forgiveness (say the words) but am I not truly forgiving? I don't trust my heart and have no emotions, so I do not know. How is this "fixed"? There is a block. Please pray that God would give me a tender heart, but especially that He would restore my emotions and teach me how to TRULY repent (not just say the words) and what to repent for. How do I get out of this prison? Also, my ears ring very loudly. Thank you.

[joi]

nebula is correct in that health issues can create some strange reactions in us.

Since Sunday we have had a guest speaker at our local church, and last night he spoke to the fact

that many people have been hurt in our past and we have walled up our hearts so that we are not

hurt again. He related a story of his mom and how things had transpired in her life. He called for us to

open that one tiny little spot and allow in Jesus to heal our hurts, some long forgotten.

He said that unresolved hurts cause people to lash out in anger. I know you are not expressing anger

but I feel this might be helpful to others who post here and might even be a revelation to you and your

situation. I actually thought of you last night when he was speaking and I prayed for you right then and there.

We serve a mighty God and I know He will reveal your needs in His Light and open the way for you.

[BlessedByTheBest]

Biscuit, it is sounding like you might have an endocrine imbalance? Perhaps do a search on hypothyroidism and see if you express the symptoms listed? Or something like that? I know low thyroid can result in depression feelings, or lack there-of.

I wish it was something that easy. I feel that God is revealing to me that my heart is very hard. I am not in touch with my emotions and cannot figure out why. I don't know if it is due to unforgiveness, bitterness, or what. And toward whom. Am I unforgiving toward God? Toward my deceased spouse? Deceased mother? Someone else? I can't shed a tear. I play my audio Bible at night and just woke up to Romans 2:5-8 (not the first time). I can pray forgiveness (say the words) but am I not truly forgiving? I don't trust my heart and have no emotions, so I do not know. How is this "fixed"? There is a block. Please pray that God would give me a tender heart, but especially that He would restore my emotions and teach me how to TRULY repent (not just say the words) and what to repent for. How do I get out of this prison? Also, my ears ring very loudly. Thank you.

Biscuit,

i don't know if this is the case, but it's not possible to come to true repentance if you have not forgiven someone..you cannot get down on your knees and ask for your forgiveness if you have any animosity towards someone. the prayer is blocked, the Holy Spirit is grieved..

the principal commandment is to love God unconditionally, with all that you are. we cannot say that we love God if we are at war with another, for He loves us all unconditionally.

i believe sin creates a hardened heart..is there any aspect of your life that you place before God in priority? even if it doesn't seem that way, it is a sin.

ask God to break your heart.

Tell God that you want to be heartbroken over the things that breaks His heart..

we cannot expect to be sanctified if we are not willing to experience the suffering as well.

i want to experience the sorrow Jesus did, or i feel i am not worthy to be glorified together with Him.

i am praying for you, may God's Holy Spirit visit you and convict you. May God engage you like he did to Saul of Tarsus.

i was once told by my mother..that sometimes God doesn't respond to our prayers, because he is too busy being joyful observing everything we do to honor Him..

He is watching..and although it may not seem like it, He is working with you..Right Now.

remain faithful.

love to you and God bless..

Edited December 5, 2012 by BlessedByTheBest

[Biscuit]

Joi and BlessedByTheBest,

My son said that God told him that I haven't forgiven my wife (passed away in August) and that I need to think good thoughts about her. She had mental/spiritual problems for years and was hard and insulting toward us at times (especially our son the last 2 or 3 years). This may be true. I have tried not to think of her much since the funeral. Maybe we need to look at more old photos or videos. I know I have no right, but may also have bad feelings toward God over some things that have happened recently.

[GoldenEagle]

Joi and BlessedByTheBest,

My son said that God told him that I haven't forgiven my wife (passed away in August) and that I need to think good thoughts about her. She had mental/spiritual problems for years and was hard and insulting toward us at times (especially our son the last 2 or 3 years). This may be true. I have tried not to think of her much since the funeral. Maybe we need to look at more old photos or videos. I know I have no right, but may also have bad feelings toward God over some things that have happened recently.

Biscuit

Sounds like you've been through a lot brother. Sorry for the loss of your wife. Praying.

Have you considered going to a Biblical/Christian Counselor? Some thoughts of encouragement for you from God's Word.

Psalm 23:4 Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.

Psalm 34:8 Taste and see that the LORD is good; blessed is the one who takes refuge in him.

Psalm 34:19 The righteous person may have many troubles, but the LORD delivers him from them all;

Psalm 37:4 Take delight in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart.

Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Matthew 11:28 Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.

Romans 8:28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him who have been called according to his purpose.

Philippians 4:6-7 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.

Proverbs 16:3 Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and he will establish your plans.

God bless,

GE

[Biscuit]

Joi and BlessedByTheBest,

My son said that God told him that I haven't forgiven my wife (passed away in August) and that I need to think good thoughts about her. She had mental/spiritual problems for years and was hard and insulting toward us at times (especially our son the last 2 or 3 years). This may be true. I have tried not to think of her much since the funeral. Maybe we need to look at more old photos or videos. I know I have no right, but may also have bad feelings toward God over some things that have happened recently.

Biscuit

Sounds like you've been through a lot brother. Sorry for the loss of your wife. Praying.

Have you considered going to a Biblical/Christian Counselor? Some thoughts of encouragement for you from God's Word.

Psalm 23:4 Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.

Psalm 34:8 Taste and see that the LORD is good; blessed is the one who takes refuge in him.

Psalm 34:19 The righteous person may have many troubles, but the LORD delivers him from them all;

Psalm 37:4 Take delight in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart.

Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Matthew 11:28 Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.

Romans 8:28 And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him who have been called according to his purpose.

Philippians 4:6-7 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.

Proverbs 16:3 Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and he will establish your plans.

God bless,

GE

Thanks, GE. I have 3 more sessions set up with a Christian counselor before the end of the year. I don't know if I can go any after December. I lost my job in September. I think I can keep the insurance via COBRA, but probably won't pay the $6000 deductible that starts over in January. I also have a time set up to meet with my pastor. Thank you for the verses.

[GoldenEagle]

Thanks, GE. I have 3 more sessions set up with a Christian counselor before the end of the year. I don't know if I can go any after December. I lost my job in September. I think I can keep the insurance via COBRA, but probably won't pay the $6000 deductible that starts over in January. I also have a time set up to meet with my pastor. Thank you for the verses.

Wow Biscuit. Sorry to hear you lost your job brother.

I'm not sure where you live in Texas but have you heard of Celebrate Recovery? Think AA (Alcoholics Anonymous) or NA (Narcotis Anonymous) but with the spiritual aspect. They often have people who can counsel you and have gone through similar experiences.

For CR locations see: http://www.celebrate...roup/usa-texas/

There is contact info for local Celebrate Recovery locations. I participated in one group when I went through a time of depression and gaming addiction. The group I was in had a former homosexual, a widower, recovering alocholics, recovering drug addicts, people who were recovering from depression, people who recovering from co-depency, etc.

From: http://www.celebraterecovery.com/about-2/crs-eight-recovery-principles/

CR’s Eight Recovery Principles

CELEBRATE RECOVERY’S EIGHT RECOVERY PRINCIPLES

The Road to Recovery

Based on the Beatitudes

Realize I’m not God; I admit that I am powerless to control my tendency to do the wrong thing and that my life is unmanageable. (Step 1)

“Happy are those who know that they are spiritually poor.”

Earnestly believe that God exists, that I matter to Him and that He has the power to help me recover. (Step 2)

“Happy are those how mourn, for they shall be comforted.”

Consciously choose to commit all my life and will to Christ’s care and control. (Step 3)

“Happy are the meek.”

Openly examine and confess my faults to myself, to God, and to someone I trust. (Steps 4 and 5)

“Happy are the pure in heart.”

Voluntarily submit to any and all changes God wants to make in my life and humbly ask Him to remove my character defects. (Steps 6 and 7)

“Happy are those whose greatest desire is to do what God requires”

Evaluate all my relationships. Offer forgiveness to those who have hurt me and make amends for harm I’ve done to others when possible, except when to do so would harm them or others. (Steps 8 and 9)

“Happy are the merciful.”

“Happy are the peacemakers”

Reserve a time with God for self-examination, Bible reading, and prayer in order to know God and His will for my life and to gain the power to follow His will. (Steps 10 and 11)

Yield myself to God to be used to bring this Good News to others, both by my example and my words. (Step 12)

“Happy are those who are persecuted because they do what God requires.”

Also see next post...

[GoldenEagle]

From: http://www.celebraterecovery.com/about-2/usage-of-the-celebrate-recovery-name/

The Celebrate Recovery^® name is a registered trademark.

In a desire to protect the integrity of the broader ministry, Celebrate Recovery® requires that if you use the Celebrate Recovery^® name that the following are an irreducible minimum of your program.

The DNA of an authentic Celebrate Recovery^® Ministry.

1. Jesus Christ is the one and only Higher Power. The program is a Christ-centered ministry.

2. The Bible* and Celebrate Recovery curriculum consisting of the Leader’s Guide, four Participant’s Guides, and the Celebrate Recovery Journal are to be used exclusively. The Large Group lessons are taught from the Leader’s Guide, keeping at least the acrostic and the Scriptures as the key points in the lessons. This is to keep consistency within groups, allowing teachers to be creative with the introduction and conclusion of each lesson.

Life’s Healing Choices is part of the approved curriculum. You will find this book may be used in many creative ways in your Large Group, Newcomers group, and Step Study groups. To find the 5 ways you can use Life’s Healing Choices in your Celebrate Recovery ministry locate the reference at www.celebraterecovery.com

Celebration Station & The Landing are the approved Celebrate Recovery curriculum for kids and youth. They are the only Children’s and Youth curriculum that ties directly with the Celebrate Recovery curriculum for adults.

* Use of the Celebrate Recovery Bible is strongly encouraged due to the fact that it is the only Bible that directly corresponds to the Celebrate Recovery curriculum. The Celebrate Recovery Bible has been designed to work with the resources developed and tested in the national and international ministry of Celebrate Recovery. The Celebrate Recovery Bible on Kindle, iBooks and Nook are also approved curriculum.

3. The ministry is “group based.” All groups are gender specific and use the Small Group Guidelines and format.

4. The Celebrate Recovery “Five Small Group Guidelines” are implemented and followed every time.

5. We expect each group to be accountable to Christ, the local church, and the model of Celebrate Recovery established at Saddleback Church.

God bless,

GE

[Biscuit]

Thanks so much for that info, GE. They actually meet in my town each week. I will check it out further.

[GoldenEagle]

Thanks so much for that info, GE. They actually meet in my town each week. I will check it out further.

Excellent brother. Your welcome. Glad to help. Hope God provides a good support group for you.

God bless,

GE