Tyler47 Posted November 11, 2013 Group: Junior Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 11 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 75 Content Per Day: 0.02 Reputation: 34 Days Won: 0 Joined: 10/05/2013 Status: Offline Birthday: 10/06/1990 Share Posted November 11, 2013 I am a married (3yrs), 23 yr old male. I dont have family or friends to go to. I live in the state that I moved to for my wife with only her family around. I need some help with a situation that is causing me a lot of anger and even resentment. My wife watches atrocious shows. All of the "reality" tv that our DVR can possibly hold. Shows with enormous amounts of sin. I have voiced my concern on the garbage she takes in politely, met instantly by a brick wall. I have never been one to be insecure even though I am well overweight. I recently went on a diet and was quite successful, (thank you so much God!), but got zero support from my wife. At points she even laughed at my attempts and made fun of me. But anyways tieing this back into the trashy tv. I lost 45 pounds and my wife showed zero appreciation. Yet has time to watch countless shows with almost completely naked men that do nothing but talk about sex and drinking. I feel like im losing to tv shows in a way. I have cut our tv down to the lowest package and have told her we are close to going Amish. I am fed up with the battle. (Been going on for a year) But her family sees nothing wrong with the garbage tv and defends her and makes me out to be a crazy. I am out of fight and out of ideas. I could really use some help here. Sorry for the long post. God Bless I Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmuffet Posted November 11, 2013 Group: Royal Member Followers: 34 Topic Count: 1,994 Topics Per Day: 0.48 Content Count: 48,692 Content Per Day: 11.75 Reputation: 30,343 Days Won: 226 Joined: 01/11/2013 Status: Offline Share Posted November 11, 2013 First of all Emissary is your wife a Christian?Is your wife's family Christian?Is your wife heavy set as well?As you know it is very important to keep your weight down because of serious health risks but you should always do it only for yourself and not anyone else.I do not watch television at all .I have had no television reception for quite some time because I feel as you do.You need to stay in constant prayer for your wife and her family that their hearts will be opened to Christ.This must be a very frustrating problem for you.....My prayers are with you.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MissPlaced_56 Posted November 11, 2013 Group: Senior Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 129 Topics Per Day: 0.03 Content Count: 757 Content Per Day: 0.17 Reputation: 155 Days Won: 1 Joined: 03/25/2012 Status: Offline Birthday: 04/24/1957 Share Posted November 11, 2013 EOG, The only piece of advice that i can possibly give you is this.. Stop trying to control you're wifes T.V. habit's....to do this,you're playing a losing hand my brother, this is only going to cause resentment..and it already is by you're own account here..... Congrads on losing 45 pounds!! that's GREAT!!,,,but as you said, she wasn't supportive ,perhaps her way of getting even with you for trying to control what she watches on T.V.??? In effect,you have turned you're home into a battle ground..... NOW please brother understand,i'mnot judging you,nor am i accusing you of anything..just trying to explain something to you.... This would be a much better plan of action i think.... swallow you're pride,go to you're wife and apologize to her for trying to control her....this open's the door for forgivness.... next...give this up to OUR LORD.....HE IS Quite able to accomplish what you can't! love you're wife ,with all you're heart.....do this and peace,love and harmony will dominate you home and lives. nobody likes to be controlled......would you?? Praying for you both!! GBU Brother Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted November 11, 2013 Share Posted November 11, 2013 Praying~! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fez Posted November 11, 2013 Group: Royal Member Followers: 3 Topic Count: 683 Topics Per Day: 0.12 Content Count: 11,128 Content Per Day: 1.99 Reputation: 1,352 Days Won: 54 Joined: 02/03/2009 Status: Offline Birthday: 12/07/1952 Share Posted November 11, 2013 I am a married (3yrs), 23 yr old male. I dont have family or friends to go to. I live in the state that I moved to for my wife with only her family around. I need some help with a situation that is causing me a lot of anger and even resentment. My wife watches atrocious shows. All of the "reality" tv that our DVR can possibly hold. Shows with enormous amounts of sin. I have voiced my concern on the garbage she takes in politely, met instantly by a brick wall. I have never been one to be insecure even though I am well overweight. I recently went on a diet and was quite successful, (thank you so much God!), but got zero support from my wife. At points she even laughed at my attempts and made fun of me. But anyways tieing this back into the trashy tv. I lost 45 pounds and my wife showed zero appreciation. Yet has time to watch countless shows with almost completely naked men that do nothing but talk about sex and drinking. I feel like im losing to tv shows in a way. I have cut our tv down to the lowest package and have told her we are close to going Amish. I am fed up with the battle. (Been going on for a year) But her family sees nothing wrong with the garbage tv and defends her and makes me out to be a crazy. I am out of fight and out of ideas. I could really use some help here. Sorry for the long post. God Bless I Hi brother. There is more to your post than just the TV is there not? I will pray for your situation. God Bless. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kwikphilly Posted November 11, 2013 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 96 Topic Count: 307 Topics Per Day: 0.08 Content Count: 18,147 Content Per Day: 4.60 Reputation: 27,843 Days Won: 327 Joined: 08/03/2013 Status: Offline Share Posted November 11, 2013 Blessings Emissary, As I was reading Miss Placed advice to you I could not find one thing to add to what she has said.....and as Fez has noted,if there is more to it then the same holds true......the Lord is able to fix all things,lean on Him & love your wife.....the old saying that you get more bees with honey is a good one..... With love,in Christ-Kwik Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFP Posted November 11, 2013 Group: Senior Member Followers: 2 Topic Count: 25 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 732 Content Per Day: 0.11 Reputation: 91 Days Won: 2 Joined: 08/31/2006 Status: Offline Birthday: 10/24/1969 Share Posted November 11, 2013 My husband is very much like your wife when it comes to television. Our television does happen to be the most offensive thing between us,and I have had issues with it since we married 20 years ago. The television,that is. I don't have issues with my husband though because I will not allow the television to destroy our relationship. Bottom line is that you will never be able to control your wife's television habits. The only way i can tear my husband away from his in the evenings is to come up with something more interesting to do together. And that can't be done every day of the week. I have chosen to ignore it. I have learned to be able to be in the same room and not even hear or see what he is watching, ...and the tv is really not worth the fight. Miss Placed gave some really good advice above:) And Fez may be right in your case...the television may be the noisiest problem in your home, but is it really the root of the issue? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
desi2007 Posted November 12, 2013 Group: Diamond Member Followers: 2 Topic Count: 61 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 1,220 Content Per Day: 0.20 Reputation: 219 Days Won: 3 Joined: 10/05/2007 Status: Offline Birthday: 03/18/1966 Share Posted November 12, 2013 ...sometimes we so focused on the problem and God is saying He wants to reactivate your faith. You need to see with eyes of God in what is happening, inspite of all your weakness and flaws. Maybe reading the bible will crush those rocks of your resistance that your having. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tyler47 Posted November 12, 2013 Group: Junior Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 11 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 75 Content Per Day: 0.02 Reputation: 34 Days Won: 0 Joined: 10/05/2013 Status: Offline Birthday: 10/06/1990 Author Share Posted November 12, 2013 Bopeep; She is a Christian, is overweight, and her family is a whole other story. And there is a little more to the story. First it takes all our time and our two year old daughter has ALREADY picked up the habit of watching tv all day. But the biggest issue is this.. What you take in is what you become. She has stopped working at the Christian school and now works with a bunch of younger women and watches all this garbage. The result is a differant person. Dont get me wrong here. I love my wife to death. I left my entire family behind to come be with her. And im not trying to make her out to be some kind of evil person. But there has been a VERY noticable change. I do believe it says in the bible also that a wife should submit to her husband. And considering I am desperately trying to help her I think this would be a good time to exercise that. My main motivation behind this is to get my wife back. I appreciate all of the great advice. But this has become an infection in our marriage in more than one way and isnt something I can ignore. Also. I completely understand that God is more than capable to take care of anything let alone this small issue. But God has given all men the responsibility to be the head of the household spiritually. That being the case I feel responsible for atleast trying to solve the problem. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BFP Posted November 12, 2013 Group: Senior Member Followers: 2 Topic Count: 25 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 732 Content Per Day: 0.11 Reputation: 91 Days Won: 2 Joined: 08/31/2006 Status: Offline Birthday: 10/24/1969 Share Posted November 12, 2013 I can totally understand your frustration...and can clearly see where you are coming from. It is very difficult when it involves a child and you are trying to keep the child's heart pure for as long as you can. So many people don't seem to understand how children are affected by what their parents watch in the home. At the same time, however...for some reason, your wife is getting something from it that she thinks she needs. Maybe watching all these uncontrollable people makes her feel somewhat controlled or better about her own life...that she may not be pleased with at present either...just a thought Or maybe she is using it as a power against you. Do you have an attitude that demands submissiveness from her in all areas? I am not in any way assuming anything here...just thinking about reasons why she may be doing this and not paying attention to your feelings on the issue. In my house it is quite simple...my husband thinks he needs television in the evenings to wind down. I don't understand it...haha because quite frankly television has the opposite effect on me, it winds me right up! I can clearly see how her job change could very well be a big part of the problem, and maybe she just needs time to sort it all out within herself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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