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How can I make a move?


Voltman

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Hi everyone,

There is a woman that I have been in love with for a few years now. I first met her through church in late 2011. Though I am now not currently "in love" with her, regardless, I am still interested in pursuing some sort of long-term relationship with some possibility and hope of marriage at the end. Only problem is a few years before was that I felt as though I had too many problems going on for myself so decided not make the move to commit to a relationship with her. I had a lot of things going on - I felt angry about past situations (lots of resentment against certain people), had lots of personal weaknesses (insecurities) as well as my own lack of career direction I had at the time. I also felt very empty as though I had very little to offer another person if I were to start a relationship (with anyone). All this, coupled with lack of adequate communication skills proved disastrous and I left her (and our church) in a journey to better discover who I was and try my best to fix myself up and get better hold on my life (though not necessarily through self-development work). I wanted to be more open and gain more life experience before committing. 

Fast forward 2.5 years into the future. I am currently in my last semester of university (went interstate to study). I have not stayed in touch with this woman throughout this 2.5 year gap. I have only had two brief moments where she saw me and I saw her both in real life but this was well over 9 months ago!  Though, I do know where she lives - her exact current address. She will stay in this address until early December this year.

My question, is there anything I can do to win her heart and make her re-consider being in a relationship with me? How can I be romantic and win her love? How can I show her that I am a worthy candidate and how can I convince her that despite my current weaknesses that it is a wise choice for her to not give up on me and to work on me?

Anyone have any constructive feedback to give me?

I would appreciate it very much, if anyone has any suggestions on what is best to do?

 

Thanks,

Voltman

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Praying~!

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Psalm 37:4 – Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart.

Proverbs 19:14 – House and wealth are inherited from fathers, but a prudent wife is from the Lord.

I can only say that God chose the best wife for you before you were born. I don't know your faith so I don't know how that statement sounds to you but, as a Christian, your Father has already worked out more of the details that you can possibly imagine. The way to find His wife for you is to look for Him to lead; do your best not to try to lead God. Try to remember it’s God first and everything else second. If you keep first-things first, then second things will come; if you put second-things first, you may lose them both!

Jerimiah 29:11 – For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

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Hi Voltman, and welcome to Worthy.  After you have 5 posts you may go to other forums.  This question may be better suited to the Questions and Answers Forum.  "Seekers Forums" are for those who are seeking a faith in Christ or are looking for answers to faith.  So after five posts just go to the Inner Court and go to "Questions and Answers"  Again Welcome to Worthy.

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I would say do not go to her with any "moves" or game as that can come across as disingenuous. Pray for God to guide you if this is a relationship you should pursue; if it is something within God's will, then go to her in honesty. Tell her what you just said in your post... that you wanted more to offer her and are still interested in her. Pray for her and ask her to pray about a possible relationship as well. If you both feel led to go forward, make sure you pray together and talk openly to each other and before God.

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Seraph and others have answered your questions brilliantly , praying for you .

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