Jayne Posted September 19, 2019 Group: Royal Member Followers: 16 Topic Count: 107 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 3,820 Content Per Day: 1.30 Reputation: 4,805 Days Won: 2 Joined: 03/31/2016 Status: Offline Share Posted September 19, 2019 On 3/25/2019 at 12:46 AM, missmuffet said: Marriage is a personal choice. It is better to be single than to marry the wrong person. It is best to leave your life to God and letting Him choose what His plan is for your life. You've contradicted yourself. You said: [1] Marriage is a personal choice. [2] God chooses whether you are married or not. Which is it? I say it is not a personal choice because there are millions upon millions of people across the world whose greatest desire was and still is to be married with a family and it just isn't going to happen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jayne Posted September 19, 2019 Group: Royal Member Followers: 16 Topic Count: 107 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 3,820 Content Per Day: 1.30 Reputation: 4,805 Days Won: 2 Joined: 03/31/2016 Status: Offline Share Posted September 19, 2019 (edited) On 3/23/2019 at 2:38 PM, shortangel said: Amen good point here true God does not promise that each person will find a spouse, he does promise that each of us are either called to be single or married You are right. God does not promise all to be married. Some are called to singleness. But that doesn't mean it is easily accepted. What hurts about that the most is how the church treats single and divorced people. I should know. I'm single and have been there, done that, and felt the pain of it. Church is all about the family. The husband, the wife, and kids and then the grandkids. If you don't fall into that mold - be ready for being treated like you have three heads sometimes. Many churches, in fact, most churches I know have created Sunday School classes for the single and divorced because they don't "fit in" with married people. I've never understood that. C'est la vie. It's not the norm to be single. For 32 years, my student at school and their parents would occasionally write "Mrs. Jayne" on cards, notes, and other documents. It's just an assumption. I never made a fuss about it. It's just what everyone expects of life. For years I wanted a husband and family more than I wanted anything else. I dated a few men for several years. Got a marriage proposal. Led a "normal" life in that regards. But none of it was God's will. I do not resent God for that. And I do work a lot for the kingdom and do many things that I could not do if I had a husband and children. I see that. I gave up about 15 years ago and settled for being alone. It's fine except when I still get the occasional, "WHY are you not married?!?" or the whispered, "Poor jayne, you know she never married". I've even gotten two times , "ARE YOU GAY?!?" Most of what I get is the UNSOLICITED, "Oh aren't you glad to be single.? Trust me, you don't want a husband. They're too much trouble Just think of all the fun you have being single". Yes...people will say anything to a single person about their singleness and never give it a thought. That last one stings a little more because it's so patronizing. The last woman who said that to me - I retorted - "I'm so glad to hear you say that! Say, why don't you divorce your husband since you seem to think they are too much trouble and leave your children and come and live with me. We could REALLY kick up our heels together and have a high old time." She didn't smile. And she walked away. I laughed on the inside. [Don't worry. We are good friends and love each other.] I did not choose this life. But here it is and I live it. I'm now living with my elderly mother and handicapped brother taking care of them. We've all been in the same house for two years now. Again, I 100% will NEVER resent that. I love my mother and brother. It is what it is. God's plan is just God's plan. It's ours to accept a live it out. I guess I wrote this post to say it's an irritant and it's painful to hear others glibly say, "Look what you can do for the Lord as a single person!" or other patronizing things or when the church segregates you from married people in Sunday School as if you don't belong with them. Life is short. It gets shorter every year. Ours is to bear what we have to bear and serve God. That's all we can do. That's all he expects us to do. Let's just remember to treat each other with respect and dignity and like we all count the same. Edited September 19, 2019 by Jayne 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
missmuffet Posted September 19, 2019 Group: Royal Member Followers: 34 Topic Count: 1,991 Topics Per Day: 0.48 Content Count: 48,689 Content Per Day: 11.81 Reputation: 30,343 Days Won: 226 Joined: 01/11/2013 Status: Offline Share Posted September 19, 2019 (edited) 3 hours ago, Jayne said: You've contradicted yourself. You said: [1] Marriage is a personal choice. [2] God chooses whether you are married or not. Which is it? I say it is not a personal choice because there are millions upon millions of people across the world whose greatest desire was and still is to be married with a family and it just isn't going to happen. It can be both. Although if God has a plan for you to be married to someone of His choice He will let it be known. Edited September 19, 2019 by missmuffet Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JoniSteele Posted September 19, 2019 Group: Advanced Member Followers: 2 Topic Count: 15 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 130 Content Per Day: 0.08 Reputation: 124 Days Won: 0 Joined: 09/17/2019 Status: Offline Share Posted September 19, 2019 3 hours ago, Jayne said: Jesus Christ NEVER said that the reason some people live a horrible life of loneliness and never have a spouse is because they are too immature to be married. You are reading from THE MESSAGE which is one man's - not a translation team - but one mans retelling of the Bible in this own fanciful words with lots of figures of speech and interpretations and interjections of his own thoughts. AND a lot of just plain out made up words that God never said. Here what Jesus actually said when he was teaching about divorce and how wrong it is. Matthew 19:11-12 ESV= "11 But he said to them, “Not everyone can receive this saying, but only those to whom it is given. 12 For there are eunuchs who have been so from birth, and there are eunuchs who have been made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. Let the one who is able to receive this receive it.” Look at this link from Biblehub.com and you will see the 30 major accepted Bibles ALL say the same thing. https://biblehub.com/matthew/19-12.htm Mr. Peterson, who wrote the fanciful Message, really messed this verse up. What you posted that Matthew 19:12 says and what it actually says in all reputable Bible are as different as daylight and dark. What Jesus said is to his disciples when they said marriage was too hard if you couldn't divorce was this: For men - some were born a eunuch [unable to have sex - impotent for life] Some were castrated by others - therefore, no sex And some chose to live a life with no sex to focus on the kingdom and that whoever could accept this should accept it. Please, please reconsider The MESSAGE and find another Bible. I'm single and I don't consider myself immature. It takes a lot of maturity to live the single life and like marriage it is not for everyone. There are also a lot of immature married people in this world. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JohnD Posted September 19, 2019 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 0 Topic Count: 905 Topics Per Day: 0.19 Content Count: 9,646 Content Per Day: 2.02 Reputation: 5,832 Days Won: 9 Joined: 04/07/2011 Status: Offline Share Posted September 19, 2019 (edited) Ah marriage... That which no one has a clue about what they are getting themselves into even with all the living examples all around... with all the books and Bible verses... It is the best of times it is the worst of times... and for most (especially me) is is essential for getting through this life. I married the best (no joke, not bragging) bar none. But even in the perfect marriage you have two fallen sin natured human beings striving to make one life together. Been married for 39 years this Christmas. I pray it lasts until the day I die. For I not only love my Beloved Bride second only to God, I need her second only to God as well. Edited September 19, 2019 by JohnD 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts