ladypeartree Posted June 30, 2022 Group: Royal Member Followers: 37 Topic Count: 543 Topics Per Day: 0.08 Content Count: 33,139 Content Per Day: 5.06 Reputation: 24,045 Days Won: 243 Joined: 06/21/2006 Status: Offline Birthday: 02/23/1953 Share Posted June 30, 2022 being " single " is a HUGE blessing ... I left my husband at the age of 27 with my 4 children. He put me into hospital with several broken bones and threats to kill me and disapear with the children . He had cheated on me within a year of marriage and had a child with the other woman , then cheated several times afterwith others ,hit me often and locked me into the house as he was convinced I would cheat on him ( projecting his guilt onto me ) He hated me going to church as he honestly believed if he gave money to " the church " that was all that was needed (poor man ) I have been single ever since and have had no wish to ever remarry even though I havent seen him since that day apart from the court for our divorce when he told the judge he just gave ea few back handers to keep me in line . He died several years ago from what I was told ( he was 15 years older than me and my children found out via social media as he didnt want to keep in touch with them THANK YOU LORD ) but I still have no regrets about staying single So never worry about finding a partner you have the best partner in your life with Christ 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kwikphilly Posted June 30, 2022 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 96 Topic Count: 307 Topics Per Day: 0.08 Content Count: 18,147 Content Per Day: 4.60 Reputation: 27,843 Days Won: 327 Joined: 08/03/2013 Status: Offline Share Posted June 30, 2022 14 hours ago, missmuffet said: Some people do not take marriage as a serious commitment. As a Christian we need to pray for a life time partner that God wants us to be with. If you find that partner who is in Christ there is a better chance that person will be with us for a lifetime. Hi Peeps This is true but then you believe for nearly a decade a person is in Christ and suddenly you can't even recognize that person, they are something else inside, something really ugly and uncaring...... And we warn people when they are slowly but surely walking further & further and further from God and then the time comes they are no longer who they were in Christ..... This leads me to wonder,is this a willful,intentional ,unrepentant hardened heart that results in " what"? Rejection of God merely in the flesh,the guaranteed Seal of Redemption on their spirit saves their sorry wicked soul,if Indwelled by Holy Spirit how could that be.... How could anyone leave a wake of evil behind them if Jesus Abides in them, He must not have been there from the start..... It just makes me want to avoid anyone interested in a relationship( beyond friendship)......I dont seem to know a Christian,you see good fruit bearing for a decade,dont pick it up to eat it though because it looks like a shiny apple, its not- its rotten inside and full of worms! Sorry,thinking out loud Peeps 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kwikphilly Posted June 30, 2022 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 96 Topic Count: 307 Topics Per Day: 0.08 Content Count: 18,147 Content Per Day: 4.60 Reputation: 27,843 Days Won: 327 Joined: 08/03/2013 Status: Offline Share Posted June 30, 2022 5 minutes ago, ladypeartree said: being " single " is a HUGE blessing ... I left my husband at the age of 27 with my 4 children. He put me into hospital with several broken bones and threats to kill me and disapear with the children . He had cheated on me within a year of marriage and had a child with the other woman , then cheated several times afterwith others ,hit me often and locked me into the house as he was convinced I would cheat on him ( projecting his guilt onto me ) He hated me going to church as he honestly believed if he gave money to " the church " that was all that was needed (poor man ) I have been single ever since and have had no wish to ever remarry even though I havent seen him since that day apart from the court for our divorce when he told the judge he just gave ea few back handers to keep me in line . He died several years ago from what I was told ( he was 15 years older than me and my children found out via social media as he didnt want to keep in touch with them THANK YOU LORD ) but I still have no regrets about staying single So never worry about finding a partner you have the best partner in your life with Christ Agreed and He Pronises so much more than a lifetime commitment, marriage to Him is for Eternity!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kwikphilly Posted June 30, 2022 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 96 Topic Count: 307 Topics Per Day: 0.08 Content Count: 18,147 Content Per Day: 4.60 Reputation: 27,843 Days Won: 327 Joined: 08/03/2013 Status: Offline Share Posted June 30, 2022 1 minute ago, kwikphilly said: Agreed and He Pronises so much more than a lifetime commitment, marriage to Him is for Eternity!!! And dear Sister I love you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
creativemechanic Posted June 30, 2022 Group: Diamond Member Followers: 7 Topic Count: 414 Topics Per Day: 0.12 Content Count: 1,273 Content Per Day: 0.36 Reputation: 518 Days Won: 0 Joined: 09/22/2014 Status: Offline Author Share Posted June 30, 2022 5 hours ago, kwikphilly said: Hey all,its funny - I just read the pages I missed to catch up & I love how there are such serious comments with good advice ,beautiful testimonies and then total ridiculously silly comments in between..... Its a big mix of love,compassion,sympathy,joy,sadness,laughter,understanding,wisdom ,humor,kindness,fellowship ...it brings me back to wonderful memories of my big Italian Sunday family gatherings Talk about " blind dates"- ha! My ancestors set up their children's marraigrs( fixed/ arranged marriage)_ It was customary in Sicily.So my grandmother was promised to a pretty well off fellow in America & she was sent here on ship ( Olga was the name of the boat) to marry a man she never met,she was a teenager.....She was a stunningly beautiful young lady with quite a mind of her own There was a handsome young Sicilian man who was a passenger on the Olga, he caught a glimpse of my grandmother and was taken by her beauty,he had to meet her The young man was my grandfather- they fell madly in love on the journey to America and he asked her to marry him! Grandmother said" yes"..... She used to brag about her beauty(she was terribly vain) She would say" Because I'm so beautiful it cost him( my grandpa) a fortune to have me as his wife- lol They had to pay the fiancée's family double what they paid my grandmothers parents for the betrothal promise plus my grandfather had to negotiate with her parents for their blessings blessings( more money!)...& they were together until my grandpa passed away,they had 6 kids,dozens of grandkids ( they named their first born " Olga") Anyway,speaking of " blind dates"- love is blind,they say and because of " love" which I'd say they fell in "lust"- they broke every rule in the book( Book of Sicilians?)caused a lot of chaos for 2 families and had a tumultuous relationship for decades...... I often wonder if arranged marriages are so bad, they seem to stay together,become friends & learn to love each other in most cases I've heard of... The falling in " love" stuff I'm not so sure about anymore From a Christian point of view I'm all confused these days,tbh- maybe I'm not supposed to get it,just meant to be by myself with the Lord With love in Christ, Kwik there are 2 sides to every story. People like to romaticizie things without pointing out the other ends How many of such matchups work like that. Often, marriagaes are arranged for financial convenience, sometimes little girls get bethrothed to men who are already adults when they are now born etc.People say muslims do arranged marriages and they work out, but they dont point out how fast muslims also divorce Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Starise Posted June 30, 2022 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 13 Topic Count: 279 Topics Per Day: 0.20 Content Count: 13,131 Content Per Day: 9.63 Reputation: 13,692 Days Won: 149 Joined: 08/26/2020 Status: Offline Share Posted June 30, 2022 (edited) OK so I was trying to carry quotes across several pages and lost them all. It has worked for me before. I'm just going to comment in a more abbreviated way. When you go through something like a spouse's adultery ( multiple personal encounters with different people)), especially after 20 years with them that you thought was going to be the rest of your life, after having children with them, it takes the "funny" right out of it. I can appreciate trying to make this light hearted and I even chuckled at a few of the comments, but trust me when I say it's one of the worst forms of hell here on this earth you will ever go through as a spouse to someone like that. I don't think many of you have any real idea how it feels to have built up total trust with someone only to find them unfaithful, giving them the opportunity to make things right. Sometimes I feel like I gave far more slack than she deserved in attempting to go to counseling and see what the problems were so we could correct them. For me, the biggest one the first time was trying to find a way not to remember what had happened because every time I thought about it I was angry and hurt. Things only got worse from there because she continued that behavior over time and had to be caught at it. She wasn't upset about what she had done. She was upset she had been discovered....again. So I digress. None of this is particularly funny to me and I am attempting to help anyone looking for a mate to know what NOT to look for. Maybe I shouldn't care Go out there and get bitten, learn the hard way. @debrakay Yes I was an "Irish Musician". They have video of me playing my fiddle in the bar and I once went into bars on a fairly regular basis as a believer because that's where the music was. I had to with hold some of my knee jerk responses to your mentioning bars because I didn't want to offend someone who met their mate in a bar. I realize bars are more of a family culture in some countries and even areas of the US. It's really a secular church fellowship in some places minus the church part. I don't think God is any more or less in a bar than anywhere else so far as His omnipresence is concerned, so even though I got that little slam there are also implications to bars. I would hope we all know that. My father was an alcoholic and I seen bars get him into trouble more than once. Not only with alcohol but with women too, so for me to suggest it's a good way for a Christian person to meet another good christian person is not something I would EVER recommend. We all know what alcohol does to some people. They let their guard down and do things they would not normally do and alcohol is the focus of a bar. 'Hopefully' now as a more mature woman you see what I'm saying. Edited June 30, 2022 by Starise 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Starise Posted June 30, 2022 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 13 Topic Count: 279 Topics Per Day: 0.20 Content Count: 13,131 Content Per Day: 9.63 Reputation: 13,692 Days Won: 149 Joined: 08/26/2020 Status: Offline Share Posted June 30, 2022 4 hours ago, ladypeartree said: being " single " is a HUGE blessing ... I left my husband at the age of 27 with my 4 children. He put me into hospital with several broken bones and threats to kill me and disapear with the children . He had cheated on me within a year of marriage and had a child with the other woman , then cheated several times afterwith others ,hit me often and locked me into the house as he was convinced I would cheat on him ( projecting his guilt onto me ) He hated me going to church as he honestly believed if he gave money to " the church " that was all that was needed (poor man ) I have been single ever since and have had no wish to ever remarry even though I havent seen him since that day apart from the court for our divorce when he told the judge he just gave ea few back handers to keep me in line . He died several years ago from what I was told ( he was 15 years older than me and my children found out via social media as he didnt want to keep in touch with them THANK YOU LORD ) but I still have no regrets about staying single So never worry about finding a partner you have the best partner in your life with Christ Wow. After all of that no wonder you never remarried. I don't think I would either. So glad you are at a place in your life where you feel content being single! You have quite an amazing family regardless! 1 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
believeinHim Posted June 30, 2022 Group: Royal Member Followers: 7 Topic Count: 440 Topics Per Day: 0.28 Content Count: 3,243 Content Per Day: 2.07 Reputation: 420 Days Won: 0 Joined: 02/06/2020 Status: Offline Share Posted June 30, 2022 19 hours ago, believeinHim said: {above reply attached to here} In which case I would beg to differ @Starisei meant this in conjuction with my enoob post Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
believeinHim Posted June 30, 2022 Group: Royal Member Followers: 7 Topic Count: 440 Topics Per Day: 0.28 Content Count: 3,243 Content Per Day: 2.07 Reputation: 420 Days Won: 0 Joined: 02/06/2020 Status: Offline Share Posted June 30, 2022 19 hours ago, believeinHim said: I thought you were going to say someone like enoob @Starisethis is the above comment i meant Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kwikphilly Posted June 30, 2022 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 96 Topic Count: 307 Topics Per Day: 0.08 Content Count: 18,147 Content Per Day: 4.60 Reputation: 27,843 Days Won: 327 Joined: 08/03/2013 Status: Offline Share Posted June 30, 2022 1 hour ago, creativemechanic said: there are 2 sides to every story. People like to romaticizie things without pointing out the other ends How many of such matchups work like that. Often, marriagaes are arranged for financial convenience, sometimes little girls get bethrothed to men who are already adults when they are now born etc.People say muslims do arranged marriages and they work out, but they dont point out how fast muslims also divorce Well sure but I was really only thinking about my own people..... Italy, maybe I should have mentioned that- lol....my people ,much like the Jews main reason was bloodline.... I should really speak only for the Sicilians because they even frown upon us mixing with Italians- lol. Funny? Probably sounds really weird but from my own experiences ,turnd out its very simple and uncomplicated to be with an Italian man( of course Christian goes without saying for me- first & foremost) And fellas from other backgrounds just seem to be raised differently than we are,dont have the same traditions& are hard to relate to( for myself)... People come n go throughout our lives ,I dunno dunno much.... As I said,was just thinking 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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