SIC Posted June 14, 2023 Group: Diamond Member Followers: 13 Topic Count: 34 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 2,436 Content Per Day: 0.83 Reputation: 2,625 Days Won: 3 Joined: 05/02/2016 Status: Offline Birthday: 08/11/1989 Author Share Posted June 14, 2023 1 minute ago, FreeGrace said: Next question: Why don't you want me to be a success in my field? Her response 'Stars don't have time for their family' 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FreeGrace Posted June 14, 2023 Group: Royal Member Followers: 4 Topic Count: 8 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 4,419 Content Per Day: 8.21 Reputation: 610 Days Won: 0 Joined: 11/07/2022 Status: Offline Share Posted June 14, 2023 57 minutes ago, SIC said: Her response 'Stars don't have time for their family' Looks as if she wants to be your #1 focus. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SIC Posted June 14, 2023 Group: Diamond Member Followers: 13 Topic Count: 34 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 2,436 Content Per Day: 0.83 Reputation: 2,625 Days Won: 3 Joined: 05/02/2016 Status: Offline Birthday: 08/11/1989 Author Share Posted June 14, 2023 29 minutes ago, FreeGrace said: Looks as if she wants to be your #1 focus. That is a problem isn't it? My understanding is that God gives each individual some work to do Genesis 2:15. The partner is to help the individual do the work as best as they can. Genesis 2:17. This works both ways. Both the male and the female are to help each other do the work that God has given each. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kwikphilly Posted June 14, 2023 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 96 Topic Count: 307 Topics Per Day: 0.08 Content Count: 18,136 Content Per Day: 4.63 Reputation: 27,817 Days Won: 327 Joined: 08/03/2013 Status: Offline Share Posted June 14, 2023 2 hours ago, SIC said: Ok. This is about partner. Not wife. If your girlfriend consistently does not have your back, Should one break up? Obviously nobody else can answer that question. But I wanted your insight on whether or not it is a problem... Blessings SIC I'm just looking to answer honestly and honestly my immediate thought was"Absolutey","yep",better believe it"... lol I would not want to be with anyone who does not have my back-imo that's a coward and I've no place for a coward in my life But is it different for a woman not to have her man's back,I don't know,perhaps-its possible.... I wouldn't really know because I'd even stand up for a stranger so nevermind a "partner" I was raised that way,right ,wrong or indifferent my Mom &Dad always had each other's AND my back.... and when I was wrong it was dealt with privately In His Love,Kwik I'm wondering if we might be thinkjng"have your back" different? Lol Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teddyv Posted June 14, 2023 Group: Royal Member Followers: 6 Topic Count: 6 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 4,264 Content Per Day: 2.93 Reputation: 2,302 Days Won: 1 Joined: 05/03/2020 Status: Offline Share Posted June 14, 2023 @SIC Yeah, something seems a little off. Her shouting at you in front of the clerk was poor form - that should have been discussed in a more private setting. Certain fields of work and study can be hard on relationships. As a geologist, I've seen firsthand a lot of wrecked relationships as a results of extended fieldwork, especially for families. Even my wife, who knew exactly what I did before we got married, struggled with my absence in the first couple of years (I was gone for over 6 months of our first year). Also, not having your partner interested at all in your work seems to be a bit of a red flag for any long-term relationship. While one's partner/wife/husband does not have to take a huge interest, there should be an element of support for that work, especially when one feels very called and excited for that work. Related to the above, my wife does not really get much of geology but she does support my work. I'm not a teacher/administrator like her, but again, I take an interest in it and also support her. One of the things that drew me to eventually start dating my future wife, was that we were able to talk freely and widely about many different things. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ladypeartree Posted June 14, 2023 Group: Royal Member Followers: 37 Topic Count: 539 Topics Per Day: 0.08 Content Count: 32,790 Content Per Day: 5.03 Reputation: 23,471 Days Won: 223 Joined: 06/21/2006 Status: Offline Birthday: 02/23/1953 Share Posted June 14, 2023 Sounds as if she is a rather insecure person and is afraid she will NOT be the focus of your attention .Is she very needy ? DO you actually spend quality time with her as opposed to just being with her whilst your mind and your focus is elsewhere ? It sounds as if you tow no longer have similar goals BUT you also need to look to yourself and be honest about your treatment of her too TALK TO HER and even more important LISTEN to her If after that you are no longer in accord them it is best you split up 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FreeGrace Posted June 14, 2023 Group: Royal Member Followers: 4 Topic Count: 8 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 4,419 Content Per Day: 8.21 Reputation: 610 Days Won: 0 Joined: 11/07/2022 Status: Offline Share Posted June 14, 2023 2 hours ago, SIC said: That is a problem isn't it? My understanding is that God gives each individual some work to do Genesis 2:15. The partner is to help the individual do the work as best as they can. Genesis 2:17. This works both ways. Both the male and the female are to help each other do the work that God has given each. Agreed! May God grant you wisdom in this area. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SIC Posted June 14, 2023 Group: Diamond Member Followers: 13 Topic Count: 34 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 2,436 Content Per Day: 0.83 Reputation: 2,625 Days Won: 3 Joined: 05/02/2016 Status: Offline Birthday: 08/11/1989 Author Share Posted June 14, 2023 3 hours ago, kwikphilly said: Blessings SIC I'm just looking to answer honestly and honestly my immediate thought was"Absolutey","yep",better believe it"... lol I would not want to be with anyone who does not have my back-imo that's a coward and I've no place for a coward in my life But is it different for a woman not to have her man's back,I don't know,perhaps-its possible.... I wouldn't really know because I'd even stand up for a stranger so nevermind a "partner" I was raised that way,right ,wrong or indifferent my Mom &Dad always had each other's AND my back.... and when I was wrong it was dealt with privately In His Love,Kwik I'm wondering if we might be thinkjng"have your back" different? Lol Thanks .. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SIC Posted June 14, 2023 Group: Diamond Member Followers: 13 Topic Count: 34 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 2,436 Content Per Day: 0.83 Reputation: 2,625 Days Won: 3 Joined: 05/02/2016 Status: Offline Birthday: 08/11/1989 Author Share Posted June 14, 2023 3 hours ago, teddyv said: @SIC Yeah, something seems a little off. Her shouting at you in front of the clerk was poor form - that should have been discussed in a more private setting. Certain fields of work and study can be hard on relationships. As a geologist, I've seen firsthand a lot of wrecked relationships as a results of extended fieldwork, especially for families. Even my wife, who knew exactly what I did before we got married, struggled with my absence in the first couple of years (I was gone for over 6 months of our first year). Also, not having your partner interested at all in your work seems to be a bit of a red flag for any long-term relationship. While one's partner/wife/husband does not have to take a huge interest, there should be an element of support for that work, especially when one feels very called and excited for that work. Related to the above, my wife does not really get much of geology but she does support my work. I'm not a teacher/administrator like her, but again, I take an interest in it and also support her. One of the things that drew me to eventually start dating my future wife, was that we were able to talk freely and widely about many different things. I get the feeling that she is envious of me.. Doesn't want me to be successful.. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SIC Posted June 14, 2023 Group: Diamond Member Followers: 13 Topic Count: 34 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 2,436 Content Per Day: 0.83 Reputation: 2,625 Days Won: 3 Joined: 05/02/2016 Status: Offline Birthday: 08/11/1989 Author Share Posted June 14, 2023 3 hours ago, ladypeartree said: Sounds as if she is a rather insecure person and is afraid she will NOT be the focus of your attention .Is she very needy ? DO you actually spend quality time with her as opposed to just being with her whilst your mind and your focus is elsewhere ? It sounds as if you tow no longer have similar goals BUT you also need to look to yourself and be honest about your treatment of her too TALK TO HER and even more important LISTEN to her If after that you are no longer in accord them it is best you split up Am I perfect in listening to her? Definitely not. Do I listen to her nd pay attention to her when she talks? Absolutely. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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