Dotter of Eve Posted April 7, 2008 Group: Members Followers: 2 Topic Count: 3 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 27 Content Per Day: 0.00 Reputation: 0 Days Won: 0 Joined: 04/01/2004 Status: Offline Birthday: 11/01/1991 Share Posted April 7, 2008 Let me tell you this isn't easy to reply to. It's very difficult for me to say anything at this point because I am only hearing one side of the story. I CAN however tell you (NLT) Mathew 18:15, 16 & 17 instructs us this: "If another believer sins against you, go privately and point out the fault. If the other person listens and confesses it, you have won that person back. But if you are unsuccesful, take one or two others with you and go back again, so that everything you say may be confirmed by two or three witnesses. If that person still refuses to listen, take your case to the church..." First talk to God before talking to the man. Please aproach this with honest intentions. Remember, other christians are our brothers and sisters. Even if you disagree, they are not the real enemy. Go about this gracefully, in fellowship mistakes aren't rubbed in, they're rubbed out. Attack the problem, not the person. (NCV) Ephesians 4:3 says "You are joined together with peace through the spirit, so make every effort to continue together this way." It isn't your place to judge this man. Only God knows what's in his heart. However I think it's reasonable to take him out of your life if he causes you destruction. If you read on in Matthew 18:17 it says "... If the church decides you are right. but the other person won't accept it, treast that person as a pagan or a corrupt tax collector" I hope this helps. Please voice any thoughts on anything I have or have not said here regarding this issue. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
patricia1 Posted April 7, 2008 Group: Diamond Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 44 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 1,858 Content Per Day: 0.30 Reputation: 9 Days Won: 0 Joined: 07/24/2007 Status: Offline Birthday: 05/23/1957 Share Posted April 7, 2008 Dotter of eve...I agree if the person is a sister or brother and is in your daily assembly of friendship circle. You cannot talk to a entity and if someone comes to that one they will look at you like you got three heads. Let God deal with him. This case is different than if your brother offends you. This is not a brother. No Judgement...I counseled long enough to see the danger. I agree with you but not in this case.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Treasure Posted April 7, 2008 Group: Royal Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 272 Topics Per Day: 0.08 Content Count: 2,338 Content Per Day: 0.65 Reputation: 11 Days Won: 0 Joined: 07/19/2014 Status: Offline Share Posted April 7, 2008 I have to agree with Patricia here. I'm trying to not jump to conclusions and speak out impulsively because we don't know the details of this but a pastor who even seems to be encouraging disunity should be confronted privately. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
odditblue Posted April 7, 2008 Group: Advanced Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 25 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 220 Content Per Day: 0.04 Reputation: 2 Days Won: 0 Joined: 03/15/2008 Status: Offline Birthday: 12/28/1966 Share Posted April 7, 2008 Praying for you in this situation... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bubba4J Posted April 7, 2008 Group: Royal Member Followers: 6 Topic Count: 155 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 6,075 Content Per Day: 0.94 Reputation: 471 Days Won: 3 Joined: 08/05/2006 Status: Offline Share Posted April 7, 2008 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stacey c Posted April 7, 2008 Group: Diamond Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 37 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 913 Content Per Day: 0.16 Reputation: 19 Days Won: 2 Joined: 03/29/2008 Status: Offline Birthday: 12/02/1969 Share Posted April 7, 2008 Dotter Eve, dear sister, I wpould have to totally agree with Patricia1 on this. I've just come through a similar situation. I was with my pastor for about 17 years. My first husband, who was totally devoted to him, died 9 yrs. ago ( that's another story). I was a single mother of 6 for several yrs. until I met a wonderful man. He started to go to church with me every sunday but he was never made to feel welcome. He was talked about by the so called leaders of the church. It was told to me by the pastor himself, and I quote, " He's worthless, and a loser, and I know he'll end up molesting your children." I was devastated that this pastor said such cruel things. All my husband wanted was to feel wanted and that he finally could have a true family for the first time in his life. We left the church after that. How could they call themselves christians if there is no love? We went to another church and the very first service the pastors wife ministered to my husband and I, she told him things she could not have know without the leading of the Holy Spirit. Since then my husband is a new creation praise God! So just because he calls himself a pastor does not mean that God has placed him as your sheppard. But as sister Patricia has stated PRAY PRAY PRAY. Since your husband seems to listen to him if you speak against this pastor to him, he may feel under attack, which would cause division. I suggest to read the book "The Power of a Praying Wife" By Stormie Omartian, it is powerful, and it brings into clearity what a wife must do to support her husband. I hope this helped dear sister. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mead Posted April 7, 2008 Group: Removed from Forums for Breaking Terms of Service Followers: 1 Topic Count: 9 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 871 Content Per Day: 0.15 Reputation: 17 Days Won: 0 Joined: 12/28/2007 Status: Offline Share Posted April 7, 2008 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
grace222 Posted April 8, 2008 Group: Junior Member Followers: 1 Topic Count: 29 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 99 Content Per Day: 0.02 Reputation: 12 Days Won: 0 Joined: 09/17/2007 Status: Offline Author Share Posted April 8, 2008 Thanks for being so encouraging and uplifting in your responses. I hope I didn't upset any of you as I consider you all my dear friends and brothers and sisters in Christ. I spoke to my husband about it last night and he said that he has been encouragaged by our Pastor friend. So I am going to leave it at that. If he is encouraged then I should be happy. And as some of you have said...to ask God and pray about it. To which I am now doing.. thanks. You are all a blessing to me even if you don't necessarily agree with each other. blessings!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
seraph Posted April 8, 2008 Group: Diamond Member Followers: 21 Topic Count: 129 Topics Per Day: 0.02 Content Count: 1,801 Content Per Day: 0.23 Reputation: 483 Days Won: 0 Joined: 12/06/2002 Status: Offline Share Posted April 8, 2008 That's a tough situation to be in, grace. It's especially difficult because your husband says he has been encouraged by this pastor-friend. When you talked to your husband, did you just ask him how he felt about talking with the pastor or did you also explain how you were feeling? I know I wouldn't want to get encouragement at the expense of someone else becoming discouraged; I would want that person to be open and honest with me. It's harmful and unhealthy to hold things in... at some point, they might not be able to be held in any longer. I agree with the others in that you need to pray about this. I also agree with DOE and the verses she posted about needing to speak with this pastor about how you feel hurt by him. I don't see how the verses in Matthew don't apply to speak with him first in private and see where it goes from there. I know I don't know the whole story here, but it seems you, your husband, and the pastor may be missing some information as well if communication is lacking. If each of you are unclear on what the situation is, it's kinda difficult to change it. I pray things work out well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest lovinghim4ever Posted April 13, 2008 Share Posted April 13, 2008 So just because he calls himself a pastor does not mean that God has placed him as your sheppard. But as sister Patricia has stated PRAY PRAY PRAY. Sorry you're going through such a difficult time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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