Is the enemy robbing me of my joy

[Guest Jeannine]

I am a confused 31 year old. I am a mother, wife and a teacher. Five years ago I got married because I was pregnant with my third un-wed pregnancy. I have the first child living with me, and the second I gave up for adoption. I just couldn't bear to think about giving another one up for adoption.

You see all of my life I have been searching for something. Searching for the joy, wisdom, and love that Jesus gives. I read my bible every day, but it seems it does nothing for me. There was even a time in these last five years that I rededicated my life and asked Jesus into my heart again. Hoping, somehow that this would fix the problem.

I am tired of trying. Tired of being. I just live day by day. I know that Jesus has more for me,but when is He going to answer my prayers? I have four journals filled with pleas of please change me Lord. Please.

If someone reads this, please pray for me. I don't want to give up. I know Jesus loves me more than I could possibly know, but I don't feel it.

[BobTriez]

I am a confused 31 year old.  I am a mother, wife and a teacher.  Five years ago I got married because I was pregnant with my third un-wed pregnancy.  I have the first child living with me, and the second I gave up for adoption.  I just couldn't bear to think about giving another one up for adoption. 

You see all of my life I have been searching for something.  Searching for the joy, wisdom, and love that Jesus gives.  I read my bible every day, but it seems it does nothing for me.  There was even a time in these last five years that I rededicated my life and asked Jesus into my heart again.  Hoping, somehow that this would fix the problem. 

I am tired of trying.  Tired of being.  I just live day by day.  I know that Jesus has more for me,but when is He going to answer my prayers?  I have four journals filled with pleas of please change me Lord.  Please.

If someone reads this, please pray for me.  I don't want to give up.  I know Jesus loves me more than I could possibly know, but I don't feel it.

Jeannine,

Welcome to the boards. Believe me when I tell you, it was no mistake that you are here. God lead you here for a reason....

Please let me share just a verse with you in your time of confusion -

Psalm 145:17-19

17 The LORD is righteous in all his ways

and loving toward all he has made.

18 The LORD is near to all who call on him,

to all who call on him in truth.

19 He fulfills the desires of those who fear him;

he hears their cry and saves them.

The Lord has promised to be with all those who call on Him...don't feel He's not near, but acknowledge His presence...He is near to you.

Lord God, we commit Jeannine to you in the precious name of Jesus our Lord. Please place a hedge around her and draw her close unto you. Give and supply her needs as you know what she needs before she even askes. Bless her and send her Your Peace....

In the Name of Jesus,

Amen.

Blessings,

Bob

[2bba]

Matthew 11:30 For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.

Perhaps you are trying too hard. He already loves you and cares for you. I have found out that being a Christian does not mean you will not have problems, in fact you may have more than your share - but then we will see Him face to face someday and there will be no tears.

Take care.

[shazza]

Hi There Jeannine,

I too am a wife, mother and I work full-time and my days seem to run into each other.

But through it all I know Jesus is right there showing guidance and providing comfort. I pray wholeheardtly for you Jeannine, I have found surrendering all my will to Jesus and proclaiming to Him that I need Him and that I can do nothing without him helps me in a great way.

John 15:5 - I am the vine you are the branches if a man remains in me and I in him he will bear much fruit, apart from me you can do nothing.

It does not mean your problems disappear but He is there carrying us through it all.

Love in Jesus,

Shazza :hug:

[Guest ILive4Him]

the Lord is there with you, what you are feeling is the pain from your unhealed heart, and the Lord wants to heal that. It isnt that you have failed, but you need healing for your broken heart. Believe me, I know God can heal you. I wil be praying that you find your healing in Jesus, He is there with you now, tell Him everything.

[Guest Rootabagga]

Hi Jeannine, I too am new to the boards here as well as a mother and a teacher. I also had a child out of wed lock and married the father because of the sigma of being a "christian", pregnant and not married. Like you I also had dark days, weeks (accually years) and I could never seem to pull out of them. I was raised in church so I knew that God was there and would always be there for me in times of need. I also would remember the scripture regarding Him never giving you more then you can handle (paraphrased). I used to laugh and say that God must have a sense of humor then, , cause I can't handle anymore. The more I prayed the more things seemed to get worse and the depression would get harder and harder to deal with. I had accually gotten to the point that if it wasn't for my kids, I would not get out of bed. To make a long story short, I got to the point where I had thought about ending my life and even attempted it, Praise God without success. After 12 years of dealing with depression I ended up on medication just over a year ago. Now I am not saying everyone who suffers from depression needs medication. I was raised that God can heal all who ask and believe. God also works through others, including counseling and medication. Jeannine pray about the whole situation. Pray about counseling. Depression can be a result of internal emotional things or it could be a physical/chemical thing (like me). Pray for guildence in this and He will guild you if you let Him. God Bless and you are in my prayers. I am here if you need to talk and pray. Kate

[Guest christina777]

Earlier I practicly wrote a book to you with encouragement and somehow just when I was about to send it to you it was erased. I think the devil wants to keep you where you are. I am going to try again because I stronly feel like you need encouagement. Believe in God even though you don't feel like he's there believe anyway. The devil wants to make you believe that God doesn't care about you. Trully give your problems to God. Let God deal with it. I know this is hard to do. I have had many struggles in my life. I have felt many times that God left me alone and that he didn't care but I had to go through those things so that my faith would grow and I would trust in him. God will never let you go through anything alone. Even though you don't feel like God is there he is. Everything passes through God's eyes first. If you just believe that God can take care of everything he will. God loves you very much.I will pray for you.

Your sister in Christ,

Christina

[Dad Ernie]

Greetings Jeannine,

I am a confused 31 year old. I am a mother, wife and a teacher. Five years ago I got married because I was pregnant with my third un-wed pregnancy. I have the first child living with me, and the second I gave up for adoption. I just couldn't bear to think about giving another one up for adoption.

You see all of my life I have been searching for something. Searching for the joy, wisdom, and love that Jesus gives. I read my bible every day, but it seems it does nothing for me. There was even a time in these last five years that I rededicated my life and asked Jesus into my heart again. Hoping, somehow that this would fix the problem.

I am tired of trying. Tired of being. I just live day by day. I know that Jesus has more for me,but when is He going to answer my prayers? I have four journals filled with pleas of please change me Lord. Please.

Well, I see that you have been offered a lot of comfort from those that have been in your shoes. I too have been in your shoes in a sense and when I sought God about all my troubles and troubled spirit, He flat told me it was because of my sin. He reminded me of:

John 14:15 If ye love me, keep my commandments.

John 14:21 He that hath my commandments, and keepeth them, he it is that loveth me: and he that loveth me shall be loved of my Father, and I will love him, and will manifest myself to him.

John 15:10-11 If ye keep my commandments, ye shall abide in my love; even as I have kept my Father's commandments, and abide in his love. 11 These things have I spoken unto you, that my joy might remain in you, and that your joy might be full.

Please read the following carefully and DO what it says:

Philippians 4:4-9 Rejoice in the Lord alway: and again I say, Rejoice. 5 Let your moderation be known unto all men. The Lord is at hand. 6 Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. 7 And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. 8 Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. 9 Those things, which ye have both learned, and received, and heard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you.

Understand, I am not trying to be one of Job's comforters, but you have already stated your present spiritual condition and disobedience to God. My prayers are that you draw closer to Him through your love and obedience to Him.

Blessings,

Dad Ernie