GOD FREED ME!

[tylerco113x]

My Brothers and Sisters in Christ,

This is long, but I ask you to read it because I feel it is so awesome to share.

Before I tell what happened on retreat, I have to tell you this. Generally, I have been a person with very low self-esteem and constant worry. This has some things to do with my life at home, where I am constantly pressured to be better than I am, and that I'm not good enough. Even when I had straight A's my parents seemed to be dissapointed that I had missed an assignment or two. At school I was never popular, never had a girlfriend (except a one weeker, who dumped me) and just felt so stupid about myself.

When I became a Christian that changed little by little, as God slowely started to reveal himself to me. Eventually I started to feel better about myself. But with God and the Holy Spirit reassuring me, other things came as well. Slowely I began to feel extreme doubt. Day by day I started feeling that what I was doing was so stupid and God was fake. When I would worship I would be distracted by the strangest thoughts. Eventually it got to a point that when I did anything spiritual there was a constant battle in my head. Not until now did I realize that it was something trying to drive me away from God.

Anyway, on to what happened to me this weekend.

This weekend I went on my first retreat and it was amazing. The retreat was called "Phenominon" and the phrase to describe it was "Where super and natural unite." The main topic of the retreat was fighting with God against Satan and his Demons.

On Wednesday night when we arrived we had two hours of worship, and it was awesome. God was with us and he touched many people that night. A few people had visions of things, and I saw and felt things I have never seen or felt before. (By the way, I've been a Christian for six months, so I am not experienced, but I have seen my fair share of things and felt God several times.) I prayed with several people that night. I went to bed very spiritually aware.

On Thursday the enemy came. We were separated into small groups. When the adult leader Billy asked how many people believed in demons, half the group raised their hands (including myself). We discussed God, angels, demons and Satan, and how the evil ones battle for souls. Later in the day, when our group met, we were discussing things and I found out that my new friend John had gone to Africa on a mission this summer, and had seen some evil ungodly things, like demons and wichcraft. We then started to read "The Screwtape Letters" by C.S. Lewis out loud. For those of you who don't know, it is a ficticious letter from a higher demon to a lower demon, telling him how to claim a specific man's soul and use certain tactics. Even though the letter was fictitious, it was very disturbing and real.

During the reading John started twitching and freaking out. I asked him if he was okay and he didn't respond. Nobody noticed but me so I started praying over him silently. Billy then asked if he was okay, and I said no. Billy and our other adult leader came over and started to pray over him. I asked the rest of the group (who half didn't believe in demons and were freaking out more than those of us who did) to start praying and we all prayed together. John stopped twitching and after a five minute period of confusion (on the student's part) we all prayed together.

After dinner I came to find out that this had been happening to several people. Things were just very weird for me. I went to service that night but was very distracted. After a little one act play put on by some students, our youth pastor did an alter call. But as he said it was no regular alter call, but rather what he called a "Gut Check." I remember him saying: "People usually remember friday nights on our retreat. But lets go ahead right now. Lets go for it. This is an alter call, but no regular alter call. We're not playing music and sending leaders up for prayer requests. This is a gut check. The enemy is here with us, and he is upset that we are gathered to worship God. He hates this retreat. I want you to come up if you are saying no to the enemy. Come and say you choose to fight him and fight with God. Come right now and bow down and tell God that you will fight if you choose too."

About half the group started to go as he spoke. I felt that God wanted me to, so I went and bowed. About a minute after people came, with no noises but my pastor's voice in prayer, half the group was weeping. I was weeping, it was so powerful. I'm shaking a bit recalling it. Billy (who is also the worship leader for the youth) came up and did quiet worship with his accoustic guitar for about an hour. Throughout that time I was in such joy, that I had these laughing fits and weeping fits. People were having visions and some were shreiking in their visions which scared many people. I was down on the ground, and God was so powerful in me, that I couldn't stay still and refrain from twitching. People prayed with me and I'm pretty sure that I heard God's voice for the first time. The reason I say pretty sure is that it didn't sound exactly like it was from around me but rather from inside of me, but it was definintally audible. All he said was "Tyler, I love you," but it was enough to have me wrecked for the rest of the night. IT made me feel so loved and so significant, but yet I was incrediably humbled that night.

I went to bed and as I was trying to fall asleep, I just started to feel sick to my stomach and like something was there. The best way I could explain it was that I felt an extreme hatred directed towards me. It scared me. I didn't notice right away, but the person sleeping across from me was twitching. He then suddenly prayed for God to protect him out loud. But it took another leaders prayer to stop the thing inside of him. He couldn't fall asleep because he was attacked.

Okay I know this is very long, but let me tell you that from discussions I came to find out that at this point many attacks had already happened. From demons or whatever it was. I don't think that all of them were honestly real, but I know most of them were.

Anyway, the next day I woke up feeling okay but slightly afraid. As I headed to worship that morning, I started thinking about the demons and what was going on, and I became extremely afraid. During worship I couldn't worship God at all, I was about to puke. I felt sick, wrong, shameful, and that extreme deep hatred towards me. I started breaking out in twitches I couldn't control. In small groups 20 minutes later I was still twitching and freaking out when Billy came and prayed with me. He prayed for God to reassure me that I was not worthless or stupid, and that He loved me the way I was. I stopped twitching and felt God there, and the rest of the day was fine.

Later that day Billy prayed with me. He said to me during prayer "Tonight during worship you're going to have self-talk, and you'll be thinking about things that you shouldn't think about. Pray for God to protect you and keep you're mind set straight."

That night, I went to worship and it was extremely powerful for many people but not to me. I felt doubt, but I told myself that I would not take these lies and that I would worship, whether or not I felt sick. I kept on praying that God would make me think about him and not how unworthy I was. I prayed that God would take whatever was telling me that I wasn't good enough or that He didn't love me, and get rid of it. I started worshiping and God came and started to overtake me. But I felt extreme hatred directed towards me from something else. I fell to the ground and weeped harder than I have in a long time. A good friend named Jason came and prayed with me and asked me what I was seeing, and I said I saw nothing. After he left I got up and went to sit down, because I felt I couldn't worship at all. I felt extremely sick.

I stood up to move and my other friend Nick came up to me and said "I heard you've been having visions." I said I saw nothing, and immediatly without hesitation he said "Tyler, fall on your knees and worship him." I fell right away and started to cry. Nick started to pray over me, and that's when I saw something. I saw a red face, very vague, its features weren't distinctable. But it was bad. But I felt that it wanted to hurt me and kill me, and it hated me. I started shouting while I wept that it hated me. I was still concience to the outside world but I was absorbed in this thing. And I couldn't stay still, but then as Nick and Jason prayed over me I fell completely on my side and after a couple of minutes I stopped crying and I felt an extreme calm over me. I felt more peacful than I have in my entire life. Jason said "Tyler stay in the gift that God has given you," and he and Nick left.

I knew as I lay there that whatever was in me was gone. God had taken it away from me. I also knew that God had taken all of my burdans, and he had freed me from my burdans and had taken them away.

In my entire life, I have never felt this calm, and this rescued. God freed me from all of my burdans and from the evil that tried to bring me down. Today during worship, for the first time ever, I had no distractions. I was focused on God, and nothing was taking me in the other direction. I spent 30 minutes just praising God with one other friend, and I just feel so good right now.

No matter what, I know now that God loves me and is with me, I have no doubt.

I love Him and I ask that we praise Him.

Hallelujah! Jesus you are so amazing and awesome lord!

Thank you for reading and God Bless,

Tyler

[Leonard]

Bro. Tyler, THANKYOU, THANKYOU, THANKYOU FOR SHARING THAT. That's why I say that the teens are NOT the 'Church of tomorrow'. You guys are the Church of TODAY!!!

Sure you need guidance from older Christians, but don't ever let them make you 'put your light under a bushel.' Remember the Scripture says: "On a farm without oxen, the stables are always clean; but a good crop comes from having plenty of oxen." Don't be afraid of 'making a mess of things.' That comes from plowing, planting and harvesting......

[Guest Thomas I believe]

Tyler , I am still teared up hearing this testimony. Praise God for he has set you free. What a victory against the enemy. God has touched you in such a special way Tyler. Lets all give Glory and Praise to He who sets us free. Praise the Name of Jesus Our Lord and Savior. Praise the great redeemer of all men. Tyler your story has me Praising God right now. Glory be unto His name !!! Thanks Tyler for sharing this...

[Guest Sophie]

Praise God! Thank you Tyler for sharing this. My heart is totally awed - we have an awesome God! May He bless you even more!

In Him,

S