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Posted

Im sorry you are suffering.  I recognise your story somewhat in my own life experience. So, I can relate. Not everyone will unfortunately.  It seems to me it might be possible, even though we dont know, that your mother, and husband, might suffer personality disorder, or have mental health issues. Just saying it cant be excluded. Your mothers behavior seems alike my own mothers, and there are narcissistic and psychopathic traits with my mother. I do best staying as low contact as possible. Its hard i know. What child doesnt love their parent! You do, even though they are cruel. Its deep ingrained in all of us. Its one thing to love them, and one thing to put healthy,or, as healthy as possible, boundaries. But thats utmost necessary, believe me or you will never heal, never feel better. With The Lords help, you can do it. I know how difficult it is. But try, start somewhere. Pray ask The. Lord to help. Read books about setting healthy boundaries for narcissists and mentally ill, challenging people, look online too. This will really help you. 

Plus you can get tons of support. Get all the support you can for yourself! Were here for yoy and if possible try see a group support group or counselor, remember you are important so take good care of you! 

Your husband, it would not surprise me if the situation with your mother influences him even more to the negative. He seem alike a friend I have as well. Try see if he would accept help of some kind, a counselor, a support group. There are phone lines as well. It seem like some mental health issues. There can be many reasons, most commonly a bad childhood. Alot of reaction, acting out, projection.  If he doesnt want help not much to do, but The Lord can definitely help. Try do all you can to stabilise yourself emotionally and physically and seek balance, over all and a relationship with. The Lord. Youve no idea how He can carry your burden, if you let Him. 

Leave the room, as soon he is starting. Dont encourage it and dont stay in it. And take your precautions. Prepare for the worse hope for the best.

you cannot trust a person like that but you can trust God, and yourself. Create support outside, have a safety plan, should you need it. And try see if there are any counselor for both of you. Try not to take it as your fault and you. It isnt. He has problems more than you can deal with. 

For your mother, read up on narcissistic personality disorder maybe that would help you.


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Posted

Id also say to have a functioning relationship with your mother.. You need knowledge and you need to get space and heal, and you need to see the game, because it is, for what it is. See NPD.  Then, you will have understanding, and strategies and able to let it glide off you, and absolutely put boundaries! Its a must. Believe me. I did and im free. It doesnt mean you dont l love them or cant show it. But understand it seems like she has no empathy. Then you are not able to be recieved.  All NPD again. Not saying it is but it sounds familiar and many mental health issues comes in on it. 


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Posted

And yes, a person can have NPD, or a mental illness and believe but, they have trouble feel and recieve the love from God, and others and thats sad.


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Posted

Somethings bothering your husband he hasnt dealt with, i think.


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Posted

A pastor, or a christian can do a house blessing. Ive done when my former neighbour had spirit problems. I sprinkled water and prayed, my neighbour heard a board on the wall that couldnt fall down, as it was nailed, fall down and things on her shelf, iron and angry bumps. After that it was peace.  But the blood of Jesus works. 

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Posted
On 11/29/2016 at 2:38 PM, JNS072011 said:

Any advice will help.

Dear sister Pamelasv,

 

Grace and mercy and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.

 

·        “And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose. What shall we then say to these things? If God be for us, who can be against us? He that spared not his own Son, but delivered him up for us all, how shall he not with him also freely give us all things? Who shall lay any thing to the charge of God's elect? It is God that justifieth. Who is he that condemneth? It is Christ that died, yea rather, that is risen again, who is even at the right hand of God, who also maketh intercession for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? As it is written, For thy sake we are killed all the day long; we are accounted as sheep for the slaughter. Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him that loved us. For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” (Romans 8.31-39).

 

Meditate on this passage know only you can separate yourself from the love of God that is in Christ our Lord:

 

·        “Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled; lest there be any fornicator, or profane person, as Esau, who for one morsel of meat sold his birthright. For ye know how that afterward, when he would have inherited the blessing, he was rejected: for he found no place of repentance, though he sought it carefully with tears.” (Hebrews 12.15-17).

 

Do not let anything or anyone else stop you from receiving from Jesus what he has for you.

 

·        “Behold, the LORD's hand is not shortened, that it cannot save; neither his ear heavy, that it cannot hear: But your iniquities have separated between you and your God, and your sins have hid his face from you, that he will not hear.” (Isaiah 59.1,2).

·        “Finally, be ye all of one mind, having compassion one of another, love as brethren, be pitiful, be courteous: not rendering evil for evil, or railing for railing: but contrariwise blessing; knowing that ye are thereunto called, that ye should inherit a blessing. For he that will love life, and see good days, let him refrain his tongue from evil, and his lips that they speak no guile: let him eschew evil, and do good; let him seek peace, and ensue it. For the eyes of the Lord are over the righteous, and his ears are open unto their prayers: but the face of the Lord is against them that do evil.” (1Peter 3.8-12).

 

You can be right: Jesus will never leave you:

 

·        “Can a woman forget her sucking child, that she should not have compassion on the son of her womb? yea, they may forget, yet will I not forget thee. Behold, I have graven thee upon the palms of my hands; thy walls are continually before me. Thy children shall make haste; thy destroyers and they that made thee waste shall go forth of thee.” (Isaiah 49.15-17).

 

May Jesus help you to find yourself in the midst of all this that you are living.

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