So what is wrong with me? Zero motivation

[BeauJangles]

On 7/14/2020 at 4:48 AM, LonerAndy said:

How do you get motivated when you have absolutely no reason to?

So what is wrong with me? Zero motivation

LonerAndy, you are a very open, honest, and frank person. You've also stated in a post that you have no problem with hurting people's feelings. Yes, that's evident also. So, let me tell you exactly what your problem is. It's a very common syndrome in today's younger people and in our society as a whole. This is it. Apathy. That's right. Down right slovenly, lazy, uncaring, and unmotivational apathy. You know what in my personal opinion is of this is? I'll tell you anyway, since you probably don't really care what I think. That is "stinkin' thinkin'!" I as a vital person having a place in this world am getting sick and tired of seeing this, "I DON'T CARE!" attitude. So, what are you gonna do about yourself? Kickstart that attitude or you're gonna end up a loser! Even though I'm an old man, I had some apathy at one time. What did I do about it? I stopped thinking that way and humbly asked the Lord for that desperately needed help in my life. That worked. It will work for you too. Take care, keep safe, and God bless! 

Edited July 15, 2020 by BeauJangles

[BeauJangles]

33 minutes ago, LonerAndy said:

Its like how I'm searching the job listing right now.... and my mind just goes blank.  Everything looks so monotonous and coma inducing.  I know I have to pick something and do work, but everything just makes me want to puke.

Sounds like that "stinkin' thinkin' there, Andy. During this time where employment is so high with the Covid-19 virus outbreak, it would behoove you take anything you could manage until finding what you really want to do in life. Living on unemployment benefits for any length of time will break you. Think they'll give you enough to make it? They don't do that. I know. I've been there. It's pitance, for motivation to get a job. Are you getting the message? 

[David1701]

1 hour ago, LonerAndy said:

Yeah I agree completely.  All of that is entirely true.  In fact, elsewhere someone posted the verse about "G-d has a plan for your life".

Yeah.....   And those Coptic Christians that were caught by ISIS and had their heads cut off.    G-d has a plan.  It could be that where I am right now.... that's it.  That's the plan.

We don't know do we?

It's not like I'm living in a refrigerator box in Mexico.  There are many people much worse off than me.   So maybe just living out the monotony of life, is what I should be happy with.

G-d blesses some people, and other's not so much.  Some people end up having their heads cut off on a beach in Libya, others end up millionaires in the US, like my relatives.

Right?  Jesus said to Peter, if that guy over there lives until I return... what is that to you?   And Peter as we know was executed.

So who am I to question G-d.  Maybe this is it for me, and I need to keep my mouth shut and accept it.

 

Cynicism is not the answer...

Seek the Lord about your situation.  None of us knows whether or not there is something in your circumstances that should change, but God does.

[AnOrangeCat]

1 hour ago, LonerAndy said:

That is true.  At this point, I can't even imagine what skills I am, or need to be, developing.  Honestly I can't even think of anything I would even want to do.  If I have any skills or abilities at all, I would have no idea what those skills and abilities are.  They surely haven't show up, or helped me out yet.

Its like how I'm searching the job listing right now.... and my mind just goes blank.  Everything looks so monotonous and coma inducing.  I know I have to pick something and do work, but everything just makes me want to puke.

This isn't much help in the short term, but sometimes a change in the learning approach can work wonders. Trying to learn computer programming from a book was immensely baffling for me and I completely wrote it off for a while until I had reason to revisit it. At that point I was able to take a more hands on approach to programming and it made all the difference. It's that way with a lot of things.

[Refresher]

On 7/14/2020 at 3:48 PM, LonerAndy said:

How do you get motivated when you have absolutely no reason to?

I know I need a job.  But I have 25 years of experience that says, it will just be another miserable job.  You get up in the morning, at a time you don't want to get up, to go some place that you don't want to go... to do work you don't want to do.   And for what?

So you can pay for food and shelter and clothing, so that you can continue to get up, go to work, and continue the monotony of life.

You do this day after day, year after year, decade after decade.... then you die.

Having a really hard time getting motivated.  What's the point?

People keep telling me "to praise and serve G-d".  Agreed. Now what?

People say "work hard and strive for your dreams"  Agreed.  Is that not what I have been doing?

None of my dreams have come true.  Every thing I have worked for, and crumbled to dust.  For the last 10 years, when people say what are my dreams and goals, I say I have none.   What's the point of having a goal that you can't ever achieve, or a dream that never comes true?

At this point, I don't even really remember what dreams I ever had.

Entire years of my life have gone by, and I don't remember a single thing about those years.  Absolutely nothing.

So far in 2020, the only thing I remember thinking on a daily basis is....   what's the point?  Nothing is going to change.  Nothing will improve.

Hard to believe something will get better, when since 1999, it has only gotten worse.

Points to share:

1. Remember the walls of Jericho conquered through Praise & Worship (Count your blessings one by one)

2. Remember when the Lord delivered Israelites from the land of slavery (Egypt), supposed the Israelites will landed the promised land in about few days only as the Lord promised, but because of their complained  and complained, thoughts about the past better being a slave, murmuring instead of thanking God because of manna, disrespectful to Leader that God appointed (Moses)............In short,  the promised land was landed by Israelites  a DECADE already. So, who's faults why the promised land was delayed to landed, the Lord or the Israelites?

3. Lastly, we are in the better covenant because of Jesus Christ, remember the "Just shall live by faith"...and Having Jesus is Having Everything.

Hebrews 10:38-39 NKJV

Now the just shall live by faith; But if anyone draws back, My soul has no pleasure in him.”

Keywords: if anyone draws back, My soul has no pleasure in him.

So, what kind of Faith we have now, a Mustard Seed Faith or A Little Faith?

If Mustard Seed Faith- then command those mountains Matthew 17:20 & Matthew 16:19

[LonerAndy]

11 hours ago, AnOrangeCat said:

This isn't much help in the short term, but sometimes a change in the learning approach can work wonders. Trying to learn computer programming from a book was immensely baffling for me and I completely wrote it off for a while until I had reason to revisit it. At that point I was able to take a more hands on approach to programming and it made all the difference. It's that way with a lot of things.

You did that too?  I had a big C++ book, and went through it 2 or 3 times.  I never could get from merely retyping what was in the book, to doing something on my own.  As long as I was just coping directly from the book, everything was fine.  But every time I tried to do my own thing, it never worked.

[AnOrangeCat]

1 hour ago, LonerAndy said:

You did that too?  I had a big C++ book, and went through it 2 or 3 times.  I never could get from merely retyping what was in the book, to doing something on my own.  As long as I was just coping directly from the book, everything was fine.  But every time I tried to do my own thing, it never worked.

Yeah, I started with a C based language. C0pying from a book was fine for me too but writing my own code never worked out until I went through a different sort of learning process years after I had originally given up on it. I'd get some code from elsewhere on the internet, make little tweaks to it, compile it, and then see my changes in action. Gradually went on to doing more complex modifications and eventually writing my own code from scratch. I'm still only at a beginner level with it right now but it's nice to think that I might get good enough with it to make a career out of it somewhere down the line. Just last week I started playing around with javascript for the first time. The IDE I downloaded for it isn't as user friendly so the learning process isn't going very smoothly yet. Getting an IDE that suits you seems like another one of those factors that can have a drastic impact on the learning experience.

[Sister]

Loner Andy

Isaiah 26:20   Come, my people, enter thou into thy chambers, and shut thy doors about thee: hide thyself as it were for a little moment, until the indignation be overpast.

I hear what you are saying and, my heart goes out to you brother.  We don't belong in this world Andy, but you have done the right thing for it says if man should not work, nor shall he eat.  You have done your duty.  Just hold in there for a little longer, for joy is coming unto all the saints who wait for the Lord.  What he has in store for us is going to be so exciting.  Nothing in this world now can compare to what he has planned for us.  We shall enjoy the fruits of our labour and see the rewards, but only when our King returns.  You shall see the difference.  Be patient, for this world is growing old and fading away.  I will keep you in my prayers so you can be strengthened and not look backwards, but only look forward to that blessed hope we have in our Lord Jesus Christ and all the wonderful promises he will deliver to those who love him.

 

God bless.

[Wesley L]

On 7/15/2020 at 12:07 PM, LonerAndy said:

I don't honestly know what that means.

Focus on the good done for others.  How does one do that?

For example, 13 years ago or so, I had a co-worker named Nadia.  Her father was in Kenya, and she was here largely by herself.   She didn't have much money, and her windshield wipers on her car broke, and stopped working.

I went and fixed her car for free.  (sort of.  Long story, but by the end, the wipers worked).

That's fine.  I assume I did something good.  At least it helped her out anyway.

Now what.  Am I supposed to be sitting around saying to myself "yeah, my job sucks, no future, and life is without hope.... but Nadia's wipers worked in 2007"?

Can a human being really live in such a way?  Can a human really fail their entire lives, and yet be perfectly satisfied with the success of others? 

Honestly, I don't know what your suggestion means.   Can a person really exist in such a way that they not only do some good for others, and yet never have any good for themselves at all in their entire lives?  Is that possible for a man to survive living absolutely entirely for the good of others at the emptiness of himself?

Maybe people can.  I don't know.  I of course will continue to help in whatever menial way I can (obviously it's hard to help other's when you are largely poor and scraping by yourself), but I don't think that would make life worth living.  At least it hasn't for me.

 

Hi Lonerandy,

Reading your responses... you see things quite hopelessly and passively.
What is your view of succes in life? What is succes in life? What achievements in life would fill you up?

I have seen someone driving in a Ferrari, having a big house, large company, a beautiful wife, feeling terrible about his life and escaped by drinking.
I have seen people with low income, cleaning jobs being pretty satisfied with their lives.

Jesus is the bread of life. John 6:25-40
Jesus is the truth, the way and the life. John 14:6
Nothing on this earth can give you what Jesus gave to His Sheep. Here on earth we are waiting for our next lives. While waiting, we work, we eat, we help others, we worship, we preach, we share, all with love and joy. Because, the greatest gift, we have already received.

A job is a job. If you need money you do the job.
To like or not like the job is actually non relevant. Your primary goal is to feed yourself. Unless you prefer a good feeling above a full stomach?

Certainly, to have a job you like and which pays well is great. But liking or not liking a job has more to do about yourself than the job in question.
If I have to, I would clean toilets or collect trash as a living. Nothing wrong with that. I would do that with joy.

2 Corinthians 13:5 Test yourselves to see if you are in the faith; examine yourselves! Or do you not recognize this about yourselves, that Jesus Christ is in you. Unless indeed you fail the test?

Galatians 5:19-22 Now the deeds of the flesh are evident, which are: immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmities, strife, jealousy, outbursts of anger, disputes, dissensions, factions, envying, drunkenness, carousing, and things like these, of which I forewarn you, just as I have forewarned you, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,  gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.

 

[LonerAndy]

1 hour ago, Wesley L said:

Hi Lonerandy,

Reading your responses... you see things quite hopelessly and passively.
What is your view of succes in life? What is succes in life? What achievements in life would fill you up?

I have seen someone driving in a Ferrari, having a big house, large company, a beautiful wife, feeling terrible about his life and escaped by drinking.
I have seen people with low income, cleaning jobs being pretty satisfied with their lives.

Jesus is the bread of life. John 6:25-40
Jesus is the truth, the way and the life. John 14:6
Nothing on this earth can give you what Jesus gave to His Sheep. Here on earth we are waiting for our next lives. While waiting, we work, we eat, we help others, we worship, we preach, we share, all with love and joy. Because, the greatest gift, we have already received.

A job is a job. If you need money you do the job.
To like or not like the job is actually non relevant. Your primary goal is to feed yourself. Unless you prefer a good feeling above a full stomach?

Certainly, to have a job you like and which pays well is great. But liking or not liking a job has more to do about yourself than the job in question.
If I have to, I would clean toilets or collect trash as a living. Nothing wrong with that. I would do that with joy.

2 Corinthians 13:5 Test yourselves to see if you are in the faith; examine yourselves! Or do you not recognize this about yourselves, that Jesus Christ is in you. Unless indeed you fail the test?

Galatians 5:19-22 Now the deeds of the flesh are evident, which are: immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmities, strife, jealousy, outbursts of anger, disputes, dissensions, factions, envying, drunkenness, carousing, and things like these, of which I forewarn you, just as I have forewarned you, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,  gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.

 

What is your view of succes in life? What is succes in life?

I grew up with parents that loved their jobs.  My father always told me that for him, as a high school art teacher, he always went to school saying every day was like getting to paid to play.   He never felt like it was a job.  For him, it was like being on the playground for life, and getting money to do it.

He was good at it... he liked doing it... and he was rewarded for his efforts.

My mother was the same way.  Loved what she did.

So maybe that?  I don't know.

And both always told me that G-d has a plan, a wonderful fantastic plan, that there is some place for me in this world, some place that I would actually fit in, and be fulfilled and be happy.  A place where when I showed up, people were actually happy I was there.

15 years ago, after all the struggles and hardship, my mother caught me leaving one day, and said everyone has a hard time to start off, and I've been through so much, so G-d will bless my life soon.

Well... that was 15 years ago.  Loose definition of soon, since I'm already half way to the end of my life.  Who knows.

I have seen someone driving in a Ferrari, having a big house, large company, a beautiful wife, feeling terrible about his life and escaped by drinking.
I have seen people with low income, cleaning jobs being pretty satisfied with their lives.

Yeah, I don't need any of that.   Expensive cars are a pain, and expensive.  I don't even need the condo I'm in now.  One single guy, in a two bedroom condo with a full basement.  I have not used the living room or basement, in over a decade I think.   In fact I was almost happier in my apartment.   Jobs a job, at a big company or small one, doesn't matter.   Women cause problems.  Best to be alone.   I don't drink.  Just never have.  Beer is expensive.

Low income isn't that great either though.  It would be nice to actually fix the door on my car, so it closes properly.

A job is a job. If you need money you do the job.
To like or not like the job is actually non relevant. Your primary goal is to feed yourself. Unless you prefer a good feeling above a full stomach?

Wow.

Short story.... I was working at a dinky little company near here, and there was an old lady there in her late 60s early 70s.

Every single day, that lady would rag on her husband.  He was a jerk.  He was obnoxious.  He was bad.  He was this and that, and all these other negative things.   It was so common, that one day I asked her if he had any good qualities at all, and she said something like "He can focus on stuff".  Some really lame response.

About a year later, she came in and said her husband was retiring from his job.  I asked how long he had been there, and she said 43 years or something.  I said he must have really liked that job to spend 43 years or so working there.  She looked shocked, oh no he hated that job.  Complained about it constantly. 

Well then why did he work there?  "For me of course!" I remember that so well.  She looked at me like it was obvious.

A month or two later, she came in, and her husband had a heart attack, and will spend the rest of his life in the hospital, or in bed.

Now think about that.  This man spent his entire life doing something he absolutely hated, for his family that despised him, for his wife that never had a good thing to say about him for as long as I knew her, so that when he finally retired, he ends up with a chronic illness so he'll spend the rest of his life in bed or the hospital.  That's his whole life.

What you just said, to me... is horrifying.  

That's not a life.... that's a rodent in a cage.  I have to work at something I hate, so I can eat?  And why do I need to eat?  So that I can keep working at something I hate?  Really?  That is all there is?

That is a hamster running in a wheel, until it passes out, eats a few nuts, goes to sleep, and wakes up the next day to run in the wheel again.

If that is what the Christian life is about, get in the wheel and start running until you pass out, then give me a gun and one bullet.

But liking or not liking a job has more to do about yourself than the job in question.
If I have to, I would clean toilets or collect trash as a living. Nothing wrong with that. I would do that with joy.

I envy you.  I have tried to do this.  When I had jobs I despised, I tried to just think happy thoughts, and pretend it was great and wonderful. Yeah, that didn't work.  Eventually all the happy thoughts fade into reality.