I am completely useless to these people

[disconnected]

During the service the pastor asked for 3 adults to come up with the kids and to pray with them dividing the kids in 3 different groups. I went up as my kids would not have agreed to go up without me and also only 2 other women went.

I tried praying for the kids and did and then ran out of things to say in prayer and just felt so stupid. The pastor then came up and said something to the other 2 women who were praying with the kids, I don't know what it was, if it was instructions for something or what. I was further away and couldn't hear what He said so I felt really uncomfortable then because I did not know what was going on and I panicked.

All I know is that I feel utterly useless to this church, just a burden to these people and I do not want to go back.

I've never recieved the Holy Spirit like other people around me have, I don't speak in tongues.

Everyone here knows about my background, all my past problems that I had, and really stupid things I did before finding the Lord.

I had initially felt really good about going there and encouraged my husband to go but now I'm just feeling like there is no place for me at all there and that feels really bad.

Also 2 of my 4 kids have been misbehaving in the Sunday school classes, and yes, this is my fault...for the longest time I was so depressed I didn't even have the energy to get up and deal with their behavior.

My husband is thriving there though and my kids have improved and I know this is MY problem not anyone else's.

[Pipit]

Hey Disconnected!!

First, WhySoBlind is right... don't worry about it. don't worry if you are unable to lead a prayer group. Don't worry that you cannot speak in tongues. Don't worry about your past--- you are a new Creation in Christ!! And that makes you much much much more than useless!

I want to say this: our value is not dependent upon our ability or how well we can serve others or how 'Christian-like' our lives are. In fact, on our own we are all useless! It is in Christ we find our value, it is in Christ we are made valuable, and as a Son or Daughter of God we have value of incredible worth--regardless of how useful we feel we are.

As for our abilities:

We can't... but then, God never said we could.

God can... and He always promised that He would!

And we need to remember that--it is not us, we can't... its God... and we need to let Him lead us.

I also want to say this: You are a mother of four children. Not many people can manage that. You are far from useless to them. You have a testimony that can serve as a lesson to many that Christ's love is far reaching, no matter what they have done in life--that is a marvelous thing! It will be used in life to touch others! You do not have to be useful at church to be useful in life--and useful for Christ! It may be that you being in that church is to prepare yourself to greater things outside of the Church.

But regardless, you are more than useless... and you are not a hindrance or a burden, and any church that passes you off as one is not a worthy place to be, because they fail to understand what fellowship is about!

[IslandRose]

Have you accepted Christ's free gift of Salvation? Are you born again? Then you have the same Holy Spirit living in you as all the other people in your church have.

When you pray, are you talking to the Lord and being honest and open with Him? God doesn't want a showy prayer. He isn't wanting to be impressed with how spiritual you sound. He wants you to open your heart to him and...

Likewise the Spirit also helpeth our infirmities: for we know not what we should pray for as we ought: but the Spirit itself maketh intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered.

And he that searcheth the hearts knoweth what is the mind of the Spirit, because he maketh intercession for the saints according to the will of God.

Rom 8:26,27

And your past....Psa 103:12 As far as the east is from the west, so far hath he removed our transgressions from us. God has put them away, why should you worry about what mere people think of them.

You go ahead and pray, serve, love the Lord your God. Praise the Lord that your husband and children are thriving and growing, and concentrate on your relationship with the Lord. He is the only one you really need to please.

[Guest LindaInChrist]

All I know is that I feel utterly useless to this church, just a burden to these people and I do not want to go back.

Dont worry about it. When they call for people to come pray, you just go right ahead with them and pray, and don't worry if you "run out of things to say", better to say a short prayer from your heart than to be rambling on just for no good reason.

When a pastor calls people to come pray for something I go. I don't care if I'm the only one up there who isn't wearing a suit, I'm going. If they have a problem with me being there, they shouldn't have invited me to the altar.

All this was is satan trying to condemn you because your prayer was a few words shorter than someone elses. Again, don't worry about it. Some of the most effectual prayers in the Bible were only a sentence or two long.

James 5:16 - Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man [or woman] availeth much.

I concur wholeheartedly. I have had a sentence long prayer answered immediately and had long, vain, repetitious prayers answered only after I really shared my heart with my Father. He isn't impressed with longevity. He is impressed with trust

[Giaour]

Moses wasn't a great talker, he wanted God to use Aaron instead.

But God had a plan to use moses.

God has a plan for you too.

You just keep doing what you're doing and all will work out.

[disconnected]

I guess I've been feeling that everyone has it more together than I do.

Thank you everyone for the encouragement.

It really means alot to me and it helps more than you know.

Edited October 24, 2005 by disconnected

[Matthitjah]

Grace to you sister,

I guess I've been feeling that everyone has it more together than I do.

None of us have it all together sister. Anyone says they do? They're a liar.

You are usefull just because you are Obedient. Do not let those thoughts drive you from fellowship where your children and husband are thriving.

Tit

[Guest LindaInChrist]

I guess I've been feeling that everyone has it more together than I do.

Thank you everyone for the encouragement.

It really means alot to me and it helps more than you know.

Those who think they have all their ducks in a row will wake up someday and find out that they don't have any ducks

[HisWordIsSufficient]

Hey and if you dont know what to say in english, speak in tongues.

i noticed that you said youve never spoken in tongues. The thing with tongues is, you can ask for it all you like, over and over and pray for it daily, thats what i did and God finally said to me "JUST DO IT, SPEAK." i was asking and hoping it would just gush out one day, but i had to make the effort, step out in faith and start speaking believing it was going to be a tongue.... and i havent shut up since... hahaha. so if you havent done that, do it. apply faith to your hope and want.

[disconnected]

UPDATE:

I have recieved the blessing of having a better perspective on this issue today.

It seems that alot of people who have been in the same church service that night have been attacked in some way or another on Monday.

Today again, I had something happen and it was explained to me that we really made Satan mad and that he is trying to bully us into giving up.

The Lord is good though and he has blessed me with many folks to encourage me through all this and I thank everyone who has stepped up to serve him by encouraging me.

Thank You