Frustrations of a struggling Christian

[sc4s2cg]

Hey ya'll

This post of mine may turn into a small rant, or it may not which I would rather as I have some studying to do for tomorrows exams in Psychology and Computer Networking.

I've been following this board for..who knows how long? I remember (scientificatheist I think?) turn to Christianity, now he is called BreadofLife? That has been a turning point for me, maybe God IS listening after all! Well, nowadays I've been wondering. How on earth can I love Him? Im earnestly yearning for Him, I AM a Christian (a Presbyterian to be precise) and know all about God. I study Apologetics and the Bible in my spare time, yet I have my doubts. IS God real? Is the Bible trustworthy? Above all, how can I love Him? I see my father, a former pastor, now going around the US in his truck delivering loads, and God's word when the Holy Spirit prompts him, and I see true love. True love between him, God, mom. How can I get that? Something is keeping me back I think, personally I think that the questions about the Bible are just on the surface, that I long for God more than I long to know reliability (though I would appreciate a little feed back. I am reading the Case for Christ by Lee Strobel right now, but it is not...strong...enough.) The question is, how can I grow in my relationship? This is very frustrating. On the one hand, I'm scared that it is ALL a myth, on the other I know He's real.

Eh, I don't think I can continue on rambling, I pray that you guys understand this meaning. Yes, I believe in prayer and I would like to become a missionary and pastor, counselor, psychologist, but somethings holding me back..maybe its the struggles I went through with porn, masturbation, homosexual feelings, all of which I got rid of with SettingCaptivesFree, though the temptations still there. All in all..Im just sooo tired and weary of looking like a "true Christian" to my friends and family, yet struggling and not finding Him at all. I give advice, prodded by the Holy Spirit, though now I'm losing it. I remember praying that I get to see the athiest's view of things if it is in God's view, I guess it is as when I am out of Church I feel like this is a myth, it takes a real life and death struggle to kneel and pray everynight by my bed, and in the morning in the shower. This little "ritual" of mine is an effort to get to know Him. Searching for the God I never knew, yet know..that's me.

Any advice for this 16 year old Christian dude? Please?

God bless,

sc

Ps. I am wondering, what if all this is because of my mind? God being something I got ahold of as a result of my struggles, the rest just feelings, and miracle healings I hear about just the placebo effect? Please help me, God is my long lost love, and Im running to find Him.

[Guest Kwiatek]

I am actually very excited for you. Though you may feel very frustrated with where you are and overwelmed, You are taking your steps into entering this more meanful relationship with him. I will keep this reply short becuase I feel you already know that answer to your own question, so forgive me if its not well explained enough.

First of all, dont be to discouraged, you heart desires to know him more- and that is the first step to comming closer to God. One thing I saw multiple times in your article was your habit of trying to turn this topic into a achieviable goal you feel you can accomplish by your own effort.

I would encourage you to realize that it is not about "how I can do this" or "how I can get there". Maybe your problem isnt this wall that you are feeling between you and God. Perhaps it is your fear to trust him with all your life. I find constantly in my own life that whenever I begin to take things into my own hands- I constantly find myself more discouraged then before. Instead of beating yourself up about why you dont feel close or reading countless book on howto get closer. Why not simply be close? what I mean is- put down that book, let your thoughts and cunfusions go for a minute, and drop to your knees and pray.

find a place of solitude, somewhere where you can be comfortible talking to God. let all your cunfusion out- your anger- your fear- everything. Pray brokenly, "wrestle with God", dont worry he will win. Dont hold anything back for yourself to handle, but instead give it all to him.

Maybe you were looking for something more in depth, but sometimes are as simple as dropping to our knees praying- God will take care of the rest. Thats the beauty of his grace- he takes our worries and troubles off of our shoulders and upon to himself. all we need to do is have faith.

Good luck and God bless,

-Erik Kwiatek

[Bolts]

Greetings to you Matt and sc4s2cg,

My advice to you both is not to fret.

Just relax and do what ever it is that is in front of you to do.

One of the biggest mistakes christians make is that they run before they can walk and hit burn out. Take it easy, take it slow and familiarise yourselves with each step that you take in the Lord. Somewhere down the track, someone may need counsel and the Lord may bring to your mind the experiences that you went thru. Everything we go thru is beneficial to the Lords kingdom.

You have an inheritance in God that will be given to you both in his time. What you see in your parents and their relationship with God is already yours to have, but as I say, it will be given to you in Gods time. Why not spend as much time with your parents as you can? From that angle you can observe, learn and enjoy the presence of the Lord. Any doubts you have, will certainly disappear in time.

[Bolts]

hehehe Bolts, did you forget me?

matt

I haven't forgotten you matt - unless your disguised as my car keys I always forget those!! God hasn't forgotten you either

[Guest LDStudent]

Greetings SC. I have seen you at another site, which I shall not mention, for the sake of your privacy. Furthermore I will not reveal my identity over there; for the time being I am a closet Mormon.

[ted]

Please don't take offence LDS, but why would you hide that?

Freedom is what Jesus brings to us.

Have a good day!

t.

[Bread_of_Life]

Hey sc,

Thanks for the mention dude, big up to yourself. In answer to your many questions:

IS God real?

Yeah.

Is the Bible trustworthy?

Not all the time in every way, but on the important points, yeah.

Above all, how can I love Him?

Love yourself, and love other people. Do His will on earth.

(though I would appreciate a little feed back. I am reading the Case for Christ by Lee Strobel right now, but it is not...strong...enough.)

Oh believe you me, I have problems with Strobel as well, I was reading a Case for a Creator. Lot of nonsense in there too.

The answer is to have faith where the evidence is lacking.

This little "ritual" of mine is an effort to get to know Him. Searching for the God I never knew, yet know..that's me.

Good for you, looking for God is a good thing. And know what, this should make you happy - he's looking for you too! He arranges the oddest stuff to go on so that he can get to you. Read my testimony, it's somewhere on this board, you'll see the sorts of stuff he does. It's quite funky and out there.

Anyway, so long as you're looking, you'll find.

All the best, and chin up son

N

[refugepsa91]

http://www.worthyboards.com/index.php?showtopic=29310

Bread of Life's testimony....no searching required

Love and Blessings,

Angel

[ted]

The answer is to have faith where the evidence is lacking.

Exactly!

This is, perhaps, the hardest thing to do when searching for reason. In our minds, we need proof of something to believe it, for the most part. There are several thousand exceptions to that rule, as evidenced by people that seem to want to fall for every little thing or idea, but mostly, we seek proof or evidence to support our assumptions.

With God, He goes almost to the exact opposite pole. He wants us to trust Him where we find no proof. "The evidence of things unseen".

It is so elementary, and so simple a concept, that we mess it up every time. Certainly, no rational man or woman would be satisfied with such a simple concept: Trust.

No, we go searching for lost trails and answers that we may never come to an understanding of, rather than put our simple trust in what who/ what He is.

He even flatly comes out and says that there are things which will remain secret (Deu 29:29), yet still, millions will search themselves to eternal damnation because they will never simply let themselves trust.

Trust.

It really is that simple.

Have a great day!

t.

[Inti]

I remember those days....they are incredibly tough. Maybe your God put me here so you can see an Atheistic point of view.

Just a heads up buddy, an Atheist wouldn't think that a "God" put them anywhere. The entire notion of a "God" controlling their lives goes against atheism entirely.