Is anyone willing to attempt an answer?

[Lost.Sheep]

I am a 35 year old male who is (I'll put it this way for the forum) "physically intact".

While I would like to have a family, I have never really had someone who could be called a "girlfriend", and because of the seriousness with which I regard marriage in accordance with Scripture, I would not enter into it lightly, nor marry outside the faith.

And this is where the problems start. Because I am not inclined to lower my standards below those set in Scripture, and due to my late interest and the fact that there is a lack of "eligible" women, it would appear that the likelihood of myself being a party to pro-creation in an effort to raise a family appears to be zero.

This is the reason why I have a question.

There are many already married Christian couples who would dearly love to have children and raise a family, but due to one or the other parties not being "physically intact", they are unable to conceive.

What I can't understand is why I have been allowed to be (and remain) "physically intact" when it appears that there is no reason for me to be so, while there are many who do have a suitable relationship with a real need who would be in a position to benefit enormously from what in my case appears to be redundant.

In simpler terms, why do I have something I can't use, when others who want it, don't?

[damo1]

from damo1

hay lost sheep

you are just going to have to do some thinking on what you pointed out and what you stand for

i am going to ask you a simple but straight forward question are you ready to live the single life

no one is pefect there are decent women out their i am not sure how strong you are in your walk or how grounded you are in gods word

so i am going to have to see what your come back is to what i am pointing out to you

one stop putting labels on your sisters and seeing weather they come to your way of thinking

every one is different and marriage works when two people make it work

i was different to you i married out side the faith i married a jehovah witness and we have one child things went bad but a lot of it was my fault not my first wifes fault and before i met my first wife i went for women who were not in the body of christ as i thought what women would handle some one like my self

i had my own standards to what i believed in gods word as i looked at king davids life and i looked at sampson he was a strong man and god worked threw sampson in a power full way yet sampson was attracted to other women and god did not take his powers of him because he slept with non believers his down fal was delilah as she learnt his secret but before he died god worked threw sampson one more time and the strength he lost came back to him to do one little thing

my new partner is pastor i took her for who she is i did not give her 3o questions to answer to see weather she is going to be right for me

and to your other question some couples can not have kids but they learn to live together so a women cant produce a child like another women does it stop her partner from loving her no he loves her with all his heart no matter what is going on in their lives if he is true to her and is an honest man and a real man

my partner had so many miscariges hope i spelt this right before we had ethan and we lost a child as well still born this did not stop me from loving her and supporting her when all things were going bad

may be you need to re look at what you stand for and what you are reading from gods word

look at adam and eve god gave adam a good women he did not give out so many questions and say here adam hear is your perfect match adam loved eve for who she was and no i am not going to go into the fall of the garden i am just making a point eve gave adam what god could not give adam even though they were mates and often god would see how adam was god new that adam needed the intimate love of a women and eve was the women that could do this for adam

can i ask you something when you are talking to one of your sisters in church what questions are you throwing at them what is going on in your own thoughts there are decent women out there and some of the most beutifall women

god gave me a good looking honest faith full women and a very god fearing women and i told my partner when she opened up to me and said something i am not going to say i told her i will love her with all my heart and i will be there no matter what

yet as i said to you are you ready then to live the single life ? if you do not find the perfect women for your self to settle down with its a hard question i did this and i stayed single for a long time i allowed god to work on me and i allowed my self to heal also i have been on my own since i was 14 yrs old and have had to grow up very fast and i am nearly 40 and have been living on my own with out a family around me

when my divorce came threw i was on my own since 2000 i met my new wife to be in 2006

yet others might have something different to say to you hear on this topic

[Hunterpoet]

OK....your 35 and can't find a girlfriend....

I applaude you for having the strength and faith to stick to the scriptures concerning the relationship between a man and a women.

I empathize with you concerning your desire to be a parent.

I pray you patience and understanding concerning that which God has planned for your life.

[Guest Greg Davies]

Hello Lost Sheep,

I'm assuming that this is a serious dilemma and not some guy just joking around.

Here are some scripture references you can look up that might give you a better perspective on your situation:

Isaiah 29:16 and 64:8

I Cor 12:18

I Tim 6:6

Also, you are only 35? Dude, you are a young man! I applaud your determination to wait for a godly woman. The Lord knows your every need. BE PATIENT! Psalm 27:14, "Wait on the Lord: be of good courage, and He shall strengthen your heart: wait, I say, on the Lord." Psalm 37:4 says to delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart.

So forget about all this "why this and why that". Just rest in Him and it will all work out fine, amen? Greg.

Edited September 28, 2007 by Greg Davies

[WayneB]

In simpler terms, why do I have something I can't use, when others who want it, don't?

..because its not about what you want... ...BUT about what you need in the eyes of God.

Why would God allow an athlete to be involved in an accident losing his legs but yet the "couch potato" keeps his?

God is sovereign and knows BEST in all situations. He looks at our needs through eternal eyes.

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28

Brother, it is like what Jesus told Peter just after he restored him. They were walking along and Peter looked back and saw John. He asked Jesus, "Lord, what about him?" Jesus answered, "If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? You must follow me." [John 21:22]

Rather than focus on what you don't have or what others have, you should focus on what you do have and seek God's will in ALL things.

By the way, I too applaud your chastity and obedience to God's Word as the Holy Spirit leads you. Well done brother.

May the Lord Bless you richly,

wayne

postscript: Just because someone has the means to procreate does not mean they'd make a good father. Trust God and seek what he has in store for you rather than seek him to fulfill your wants. The people of Israel wanted an earthly king! Reluctantly, God gave them an earthly king. It turned out not to be a good deal for them and is what eventually led them astray into the hands of the Assyrians. We just have to trust God.

[Zadok Rox]

Lost.Sheep, I'm in the exact situation that you're in. I'm 34 (turning 35 this November), a virgin, has never married, and haven't had a girlfriend since 1988. There was one point that I felt lead by God that I would be single for the rest of my life, but some time after I accepted this, God gave me a dream that indicated that I would indeed marry one day (I think of this being like Abraham willing to sacrifice his son Issac to God when God stopped him).

I, too, don't want to marry contrary to what the Bible says and I believe that God will bless me with a true born-again Christian wife in due time. There are plenty of times I wish that the due time was now (if not yesterday), but I've got to trust God that He knows what He's doing.

I tend to keep to myself, but I believe God is starting to nudge me out into the open.

Gang, please pray for Lost.Sheep and myself. Thank you.

[sheya joie]

My husband was 43 when we met and then got married. We went on to have 7 kids.

So there is hope for you yet.

[kari21]

Lost.Sheep, I'm in the exact situation that you're in. I'm 34 (turning 35 this November), a virgin

You indeed rock Zadok! All virgins please stand up!

I'm 20, and a virgin by choice. I too intend to wait until marriage until I "give myself."

I believe it is something to be very proud of...virginity is such a rare thing these days!

[WayneB]

My husband was 43 when we met and then got married. We went on to have 7 kids.

So there is hope for you yet.

7 kids?????

We need to praying for you and your husband!!!!

I have two sons and they keep us busy...and they're adults!!!!

[Guest]

and the fact that there is a lack of "eligible" women

Wait on the LORD: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the LORD.

Psalms 27:14