Christians dating non Christians

[His son]

God prefers that we don't. It's the depth of the association that would be a problem.

Luke 16:13

13 No servant can serve two masters: for either he will hate the one, and love the other; or else he will hold to the one, and despise the other. Ye cannot serve God and mammon.

(KJV)

2 Cor 6:14-16

14 Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?

15 And what concord hath Christ with Belial? or what part hath he that believeth with an infidel?

16 And what agreement hath the temple of God with idols? for ye are the temple of the living God; as God hath said, I will dwell in them, and walk in them; and I will be their God, and they shall be my people.

(KJV)

Man..., You beat me to using those Verses lol

I reckon that's a gotcha. LOL

I reckon ill get you back or my name isn't George W. Bush

Oh God don't raise my taxes anymore please!!!

[Guest shadow2b]

- Marriage is complicated and takes alot of work but I would think it's about impossible to have a good marriage without God at the center of the relationship. God obviously thought it important to warn us about being unequally yoked so if it's important to Him, it should be important to us to head His warning.

-uhhhhhhh??KMB----Sorry ta DIS-Agree with that one part of your statement{IN BLUE}but that just is NOT Right--At least from my perspective-----The one underlying factor in a marriage{Besides JESUS being the foundation}IS you have to GIVE your Wife *UN-Conditional LOVE*-And the Wife has to GIVE The Husband*UN-Conditional Love*-Marriage can't be a "LOT OF WORK"nor is is *Complicated*IT'S just two people becoming *ONE-FLESH*----------- -IF marriage is *Complicated* & is a *Lot of Work*then it is Not a Marriage that is going to last--for-one-man-for-one-woman---for-one-lifetime-{IMHO}--

-Of course I don't know very much about long term marriages I have only been married to the same 19 year-old--bride I married just a scant forty years ago :hug: :hug: - -Maybe someone that has been married for a long period of time could give you a better perspective---I---Reckon-

-Genesis.2:vss.23-24-------

-And Adam said, This [is] now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall

-be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. Therefore shall a man

-leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be

-one flesh.

-This *UN-Conditional Love* is Not I will love you *IF*-You do This--this--this---Love is I love you in Spite OF your faults--IT is based on FORGIVENESS BEFORE ANY TRANGRESSIONS OCCUR by either one in the marriage

-MATT.19:vss.3.Thru.8-------

-The Pharisees also came unto him, tempting him, and saying unto him, Is it lawful

-for a man to put away his wife for every cause? And he answered and said unto

-them, Have ye not read, that he which made [them] at the beginning made them

-male and female, And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother,

-and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? Wherefore they

-are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let

-not man put asunder. They say unto him, Why did Moses then command to give a

-writing of divorcement, and to put her away? He saith unto them, Moses because -

-of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the

-beginning it was not so.

-Soooooo Really {According to JESUS}there is NO good or godly reason for divorce--But IF you are NOT a Christian when you Marry--then divorce--When you do become a Christian you have only been married ONCE-Unless of course {Marriage & Divorce before you became a Christian is the "UN-pardonable sin"--Which "Some"seem to think it is}-But Far TOO many Christians are getting a Divorce--& THis Should NOT be happening.----

-So lets just CLARIFY THIS {Divorce & RE-Marriage}BEFORE you are saved---From Personal experience -I have seen &* heard--FAR--FAR--DEDDGUMM- FAR TOO many "self-Righteous-holier-than-thou"MO-RONS-IDJITS--DING-BATS-&-MEAT-HEADS"- Proclaim from the church bell-tower YOU canNot allow a Divorced man "preach-the Gospel"OR hold any office in the church ministry"{ever hear some lill-twerp say that or words to that affect??}

-Either the BLOOD OF JESUS-YESHUA-THE ONLY-BEGOTTEN-SON-OF-THE-ONE-TRUE-GOD--HAS CLEANSED A REPENTANT SINNER---TOTALLY--COMPLETELY--&-ABSOLUTELY-FROM ANY & ALL SIN OR IT HASN'T---INCLUDING THE *SIN*OF DIVORCE & RE-MARRIAGE!!!!{BEFORE SALVATION OF BOTH THE MAN & WIFE!!!!}---{IMHO}--& ACCORDING TO THE WORD OF GOD--

[shazza]

Both my husband and I were christians when we married but then my husband backslid and our marriage became unequally yoked.

If anyone is considering entering the same, I would have to discourage you as it is tough because it comes to a stage of, God first or partner first and and of course as Christians we know God is first in our lives but....... so easy to put your partner first without realising it.

For many years going to church without my husband was so heartbreaking but God truly heard my prayers and he now is back with the Lord and coming to church.

In an unequally yoked marriage you just don't have that spiritual connection that a christian couple has. I missed out so many years of spiritual encouragement but came more reliant on God which was a great thing personally for me. If you are at a point of dating a non-believer please, please reconsider.

God Bless,

Shazza

[darkest_red]

Ok...there are a lot of people saying about getting in too deep after going out but I was in pretty deep before I was going out with him, so where does that leave me?

As for the other comments.... we've only been going out for 7 months so marriage isn't even on the cards yet.

In all honesty, I've had boyfriends who are Christians and they've treated me like rubbish compared to the way he's treating me and I have honestly never been happier.

[His son]

Ok...there are a lot of people saying about getting in too deep after going out but I was in pretty deep before I was going out with him, so where does that leave me?

As for the other comments.... we've only been going out for 7 months so marriage isn't even on the cards yet.

In all honesty, I've had boyfriends who are Christians and they've treated me like rubbish compared to the way he's treating me and I have honestly never been happier.

It is not your feelings that are going to get you into the kingdom. It is your relationship with God. And like your relationships with your parents as a child they, God will be happy about your relationship with Him based on your getting to know Him personally, and loving Him so much that you put pleasing Him above everything else in your life. This is what you want to base your marriage relationship on. Will God be able to use your marriage, and your family to glorify Him? That's your question, and only you can answer it by your actions.

[Willow]

Here is some food for thought for those who don't understand or maybe have never considered the unequally yoked thing.....

....see as a farmer in the old days, before tractors etc....you had oxen to plow the fields. The huge heavy harnesses placed around the oxens neck was called a yoke. There were two oxen. If you had 2 oxen that were not matched in strength or ability, then plowing would go slowly if at all since one would be further ahead and have to either drag the other one, or slow down to accomodate for it. Either way, being unequally yoked was a hinderance.

That is a physical metaphore for a spiritual condition. You have a believer and an unbeliever. Two people who's lives and hearts are ruled by an entirely set of different rules. Or they should be. I have seen Christian marriages that are unequally yoked, they don't have the spiritual committment to seeking out Christ everyday in their marriage and have allowed other things to enter in and take over.

So you say it is just dating. Just getting to know someone. Seriously, what if you fell in love? What if you wanted to marry? Knowing that God warns us in the bible to not do this in the first place, then to go and flirt with disaster? I have heard of many more marriages splitting up because of the differences of beliefs than I have heard of harmony or the other person coming to faith. My parents homes growing up is a prime example. Both of their sets of parents split because of this.

How can your heart be complete when the very fabric of your soul isn't unified with Christ?

Ephesians 5:25a

"Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church...." how can you show that representation when the chain is broken. When the husband doesn't love God how can he show it as Christ loves the church? Christ gave himself up unto death as a attonment for sin? Selfless pure love! Examplified through marriage when you are made one with each other - you are one in Christ, or you should be. But how is their unity when there is no unity in spirit.

This issue is so much deeper than....."Oh I like him - he doesn't seem so bad!"

In all honesty, I've had boyfriends who are Christians and they've treated me like rubbish compared to the way he's treating me and I have honestly never been happier.

My dear, I am soo sorry you have had experiences with guys who did not honour you in Christ the way they should. But there are men out there who will. If you are willing to solely give yourself to God and his wishes, you will get the right one. It will happen. He will guide you both. Not to depress you (if you are younger), but I am 27....and still waiting. But I know that God will bless me. I don't want to settle.

Forever is a long time to be unhappy cause I didn't listen to God's warning and will or my life. If he said do not be unequally yoked - I don't want it. My heart is to valuable and too soft to put myself out there for potential hurt I am already warned about.

I want to be spiritually unified with my husband. Only in that will I discover true contentment, whole love, committment and fulfillment in marriage.

[UndecidedFrog]

Dear darkest red,

This is just my opinion. You don't have to accept it if you dislike it. DISCLAIMER: I am not a christian.

Ultimately, it is your choice to decide who you want to date, and marry. From what I have read in this thread, and others on the similar topic, most christians do not recommend dating unbelievers. You can choose to accept that or reject that.

As an unbeliever myself, I can only advise you to do what you believe is right for you. I know I will receive much flak for this advice from the christians on this board, and I want them to know that this is just my opinion. If you feel you need to ask your god about what is right for you, go ahead and pray for an answer. Maybe you will get a sign.

Best wishes,

UndecidedFrog

[Kabowd]

Not wise. Typically the purpose of dating is to find a mate, correct? Therefore, the wise thing to do would be to limit the ppl you date down to only the ppl you could see yourself potentially marrying.

If you aren't connected spiritually, your bond will forever be incomplete.

Just repeating myself. It seems to be the popular thing to do around here lately.

[Guest californialamb]

It seems that this is a matter of the heart. If you are a BIBLE BELIEVING Christian than the only biblical choice is to follow scripture and do what is good and pleasing to God.

If you refuse to do that, as a christian, than you are only fooling yourself. If you chose to put yourself above scripture, then you are making an idol of yourself.

It seems to me that you are saying your opinon and feelings are more important to you than Gods word. In that case, from what I understand, "you are a double minded man and your relgion is worthless". (someone please correct me if Iam wrong)

So you have been pelted with scripture, rained on with worldly views, boldly preached to, and still you are questioning your relationship with this person.

I tell you this in love, because if we knew what was good for us then God would have left us to ourselves. But he knows better and he has given us the bible to help us see what we are suppose to do. Jesus death was not pointless.

The rest is up to you. I don't think there is much more that people can tell you. If the Lord is your God worship Him, honor Him and obey Him. :hug: :il:

Edited September 21, 2004 by californialamb