thethirtythree Posted November 2, 2014 Group: Members Followers: 0 Topic Count: 4 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 18 Content Per Day: 0.01 Reputation: 4 Days Won: 0 Joined: 11/02/2014 Status: Offline Birthday: 07/21/1998 Share Posted November 2, 2014 i've hit a low point i was a semi-strong christian after being baptized, but temptations got the best of me and my relationship with Christ did not last -- I was soon addicted to porn. it basically became a daily, sometimes, bi-daily or even tri-daily activity. it polluted my mind and pulled me away from Christ so far that it pushed me into the direction of sex. by the time I was 15, I lost my virginity for the first time to someone I knew for a few hours over spring break. a few weeks after that, I had sex again with someone else. month later, sex again with someone new...the pattern continued. it got up to a point that just a few days ago I had unprotected sex with someone I met over the internet. i've never told anyone this, so this is all really awkward for me...but I'm scared of the consequences of my actions. I feel disgusting, I feel like I betrayed myself, what I stand for, my family, my parents, and God. i just don't know what to do. i'm at an all time low and I'm only 16. i'm confused and at the brink of tears right now just because I've stooped myself to a piece of sexual desire. i just don't know what to do at this point. i do not want to tell my parents or pastor or anyone any of this and I feel like i'm so far away from God it's impossible to get back. I'm really seeking some advice from people wiser than I am. how do I get past all of this? i've kept it bottled inside for a long time and I just want it to stop. this whole pattern to stop. I want to return back to God thanks everyone Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tigger398 Posted November 2, 2014 Group: Diamond Member Followers: 6 Topic Count: 562 Topics Per Day: 0.08 Content Count: 2,074 Content Per Day: 0.31 Reputation: 648 Days Won: 2 Joined: 11/01/2005 Status: Offline Birthday: 05/31/1966 Share Posted November 2, 2014 Well for starters, you admit what you did is wrong, Which is good. It means God is convicting you. Next you need to tell God sorry, Then ask him to help you. We all have addictions that we need God for help. Mine is smoking. You also need to forgive yourself and with Gods help you can stop and change. Someone once said you have to love God more then your sins. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marilyn C Posted November 2, 2014 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 30 Topic Count: 267 Topics Per Day: 0.07 Content Count: 13,225 Content Per Day: 3.49 Reputation: 8,512 Days Won: 12 Joined: 12/21/2013 Status: Offline Birthday: 10/06/1947 Share Posted November 2, 2014 Hi thethirtythree, It`s good to know that you need help. As tigger said say sorry, repent, meaning turning away from the addiction. What you are facing I believe are spirits of sexual lust, & even though they are strong, the Lord is stronger. You have to do your part by calling out to Him as that feeling comes on you & not have any material available to look at. Go for a jog, do something different, but replace that habit (influenced by spirits) with something else. Be praying for you, Marilyn. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rifkah Posted November 2, 2014 Group: Members Followers: 1 Topic Count: 2 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 24 Content Per Day: 0.01 Reputation: 7 Days Won: 0 Joined: 10/18/2014 Status: Offline Birthday: 09/21/1977 Share Posted November 2, 2014 Yup to what's gone before. Praise God you're convicted of your addiction. Now to set about turning away from it and asking for Gods help and strength with your battle. Get rid of the porn and try looking at things more Holy when you're tempted to look at porn. Might be an idea to get tested to make sure you haven't picked up any diseases that need treatment too. Lots of things are easy to treat but can leave damage if they go untreated. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Teditis Posted November 2, 2014 Share Posted November 2, 2014 You've taken the biggest step so far in admitting to yourself, to others and to God the nature of your wrongs. That takes a lot of courage and the leading of the Holy Spirit to do, so you should be able to see that already God is answering your prayers in this... I hope that you can. And I agree with the others that it's time for action and also making amends but you'll be doing this with God as well so feel confidence in the fact that He is leading you in all of your affairs and recovery. Think on Jeremiah Chapter 1 as God prepares Jeremiah for a very daunting task, He says to him in vs, 17-19: "But you dress yourself for work, arise and say to them everything that I command you. Do not be dismayed by them lest I dismay you before them. And I, behold I make you this day a fortified city, an iron pillar and bronze walls, against the whole land, against the kings of Judah, it's officials, it priests and the people of the land. They will fight against you, but they shall not prevail against you, for I am with you, declares the Lord, to deliver you." (ESV) The trick you see is to trust God and not be dismayed... trust that He is in charge of this thing and all you have to do is what He asks of you... you are fortified even now. ~praying Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
other one Posted November 2, 2014 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 29 Topic Count: 598 Topics Per Day: 0.08 Content Count: 56,190 Content Per Day: 7.56 Reputation: 27,915 Days Won: 271 Joined: 12/29/2003 Status: Online Share Posted November 2, 2014 the addiction to porn is not really unlike addiction to alcohol. Get the 12 step process that AA uses and apply it to your addiction. It has helped others. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thethirtythree Posted November 2, 2014 Group: Members Followers: 0 Topic Count: 4 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 18 Content Per Day: 0.01 Reputation: 4 Days Won: 0 Joined: 11/02/2014 Status: Offline Birthday: 07/21/1998 Author Share Posted November 2, 2014 (edited) Thank you everyone for the replies. I guess I just need to change my perspective on everything. I was just extremely worried that I've reached a point where I couldn't return to God, that I'm so far deep in sin it will be too hard to get out. I was really expecting some sort of elaborate replies from all of you, but now I see how simple it is...repent and reprimand. I believe God can forgive me for what I've done, but I don't know if I can forgive myself for all the lies and hypocrisy I've committed. Might be an idea to get tested to make sure you haven't picked up any diseases that need treatment too. Lots of things are easy to treat but can leave damage if they go untreated. This is what I'm most worried about...I'm afraid they will find something awful that I've contracted. I also need to know how to reach a clinic without telling my parents, because I'm just not ready to talk to them about this yet. I may ask my pastor. Again, thank you for all the love and support. I'll mark this day as a turning point in my life Edited November 2, 2014 by thethirtythree Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rifkah Posted November 2, 2014 Group: Members Followers: 1 Topic Count: 2 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 24 Content Per Day: 0.01 Reputation: 7 Days Won: 0 Joined: 10/18/2014 Status: Offline Birthday: 09/21/1977 Share Posted November 2, 2014 Just google sexual health or gum in your area. There are plenty of clinics. I used to analyse the samples! The infection rates are really low, so don't worry about it too much. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sevenseas Posted November 2, 2014 Group: Royal Member Followers: 3 Topic Count: 30 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 3,373 Content Per Day: 0.76 Reputation: 683 Days Won: 22 Joined: 02/28/2012 Status: Offline Share Posted November 2, 2014 Why did you choose that avatar? Do you wish to talk about additction or do you actually want to clean yourself up? Sorry, but you have a difficult road ahead and you definately need to tell the adults in your life about your addiction to porn. i've never told anyone this, so this is all really awkward for me. That's my best advice....you NEED to tell your parents and your pastor if you are serious and the sooner the better. Coming here, you are anonymous and really have not told anyone in your life. Get serious and get some outside help. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thethirtythree Posted November 2, 2014 Group: Members Followers: 0 Topic Count: 4 Topics Per Day: 0.00 Content Count: 18 Content Per Day: 0.01 Reputation: 4 Days Won: 0 Joined: 11/02/2014 Status: Offline Birthday: 07/21/1998 Author Share Posted November 2, 2014 Just google sexual health or gum in your area. There are plenty of clinics. I used to analyse the samples! The infection rates are really low, so don't worry about it too much. I will, thanks for the re-assurance. Why did you choose that avatar? Do you wish to talk about additction or do you actually want to clean yourself up? Sorry, but you have a difficult road ahead and you definately need to tell the adults in your life about your addiction to porn. i've never told anyone this, so this is all really awkward for me. That's my best advice....you NEED to tell your parents and your pastor if you are serious and the sooner the better. Coming here, you are anonymous and really have not told anyone in your life. Get serious and get some outside help. What's wrong with the avatar? It's Hayley Williams -- the lead female singer from the Christian band: Paramore. I chose her because her relationship with God is very strong and she leads by example. I guess I want to get better, but I also want to see if anyone else has/is experiencing what I'm struggling with; maybe not porn per se, but addiction in general. I've been thinking about it and just got back from church. I don't think I will tell my parents just yet, but I will talk to my older sister about it first because she's gone through some tribulations, is a lot older and wiser, and is pretty steady in her walk with Christ. Thanks for the advice, I really appreciate it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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