fighting sin

[Guest Falling]

Thanks Avin Jade for your encouragement, I guess most of my mistakes in my Christian life have always started with me trying to handle things myself.

I know God will support me if I try to flee

thanks

[ray]

Did you try talking to Dr. Phil? Weather or not you talk to Dr. Phil it sounds like you may need to seek some martial counseling from either Christian Dr. of psycology or even your pastor.

It sounds like from your past you have learned a lot in discovering who you are. Also, when finding out who you are you learned that you could not do it alone. So perhaps some kind of get away weekends may be in order to rekindle that relationship with your spouse. Also, some churches offer like a marriage encounter weekend getaway. IF your not married they also have getaway christian weekends for those wanting to get married.

Than you need to make lots of new friends who seem have good couple relatioships. They can become your support team and help you as a couple.

If your Christian friend is pulling you away from your husband I would have to ask myself would a Christian friend try to break up our marriage? If they would I could not consider them to be a very good Christian friend. Its ok that you want to help your friend but if they continue to need your help and makes you feel uncomfortable don't put yourself in the situation that would tempt you. Bring a friend along just to be there so you don't fall. IF you can not have the second person in the room with you to help the person than maybe your friend could sit outside in the car and you could tell when an hour or so is up I need you to come in and get me out. If that person can not come with you at all than don't meet with that person till you have someone covering your back so you don't fall into temptation. First things first whatever you do make sure you pray about it before you begin.

God Bless you in whatever choice you make. I know it will not be easy and I will put you in my prayers.

ray

[kroschild]

Don't let Satan discourage you! You said:

So I am supposed to just love him and run away from him at the same time?

He doesn't want to break up my marriage or his so I know this is temporary, I guess part of me just wants to enjoy it while it lasts.

but the convictions aren't enjoyable

Don't mistake what you are feeling for love--God wouldn't ask us to hold to one person if it really was so easy to "fall in love" with someone else--he isn't looking for ways to trip us up--that's Satan! It is known to be easy to have feelings for someone that is kind and attractive and that you are forced to spend time with because of work, etc. The thing is, living with someone as man and wife, you get to see their good moments and their bad--hence the short lifespan of the "honeymoon" period of marriage! Consider that you only get to see this person at "good" times--you are working together for a common goal and don't get to see the mundane moments of each other's lives. It adds to the posistive feelings you have around this man.

Try to remember WHY you chose your husband! The romance probably got turned to slow after you had to listen to his snoring, be around his bad moods, whatever. But God has joined the two of you--that is as close as you can get to another person on this earth! You said nothing about your husband's manner towards you, but I can only assume he believes everything to be all right. If you can't bring yourself to confess what you are feeling to him (and doing so may help him realize he needs to try harder, but I recommend doing this in counseling with a mediator--it takes the threat of "I'm saying this because I want out" rather than "I'm confessing this because I want us to work it out--ie why I wanted to go to a counselor")--if you can't tell him, then at least confess that you are having trouble feeling loved by him (and if you are able to feel so strongly about someone else, you might want to consider this point). I agree with the suggestion others have made about trying counseling.

As much as I love the men in my life, they can be oblivious to the way women feel sometimes, because we feel in such a different way! It isn't fair to your husband to hide your discontentment. Consider that even if you resolve this situation, there is still something between you and your husband that needs to be resolved! You would not be able to feel this way about another man if you still felt this way about your husband! Try to find that feeling, and rekindle it! God has given you a man to love--with your husband, flirting and "carrying on" is NOT sinning! Embrace the relationship you do have--the grass is NOT greener in another pasture, in one filled with sin you'll find it brown once you get there!

I hope I haven't come across too "knowing all the answers". I know I don't, but I have seen this happen before and experience is a hard teacher!

I will pray for you and your situation--that God will remove Satan's temptation and give you contentment! With the prayers of the saints on this board behind you, you can do anything!

KrosChild

P.S. By the way, those convictions you are feeling aren't supposed to be enjoyable!! The Spirit's prodding rarely is!

Edited January 13, 2005 by kroschild

[Can Do (Phil 4:13)]

Dear Falling,

Beloved Sister, I really hope you are taking all of these loving replies right into your heart. So many of us here understand perfectly where you are and where you will go, IF you don't heed the wisdom pouring forth.

God will honour you and YOUR MARRIAGE if you turn your heart BACK towards your husband and BACK to Him. I promise you that, and I can promise you knowing my Fathers Heart, that He will bless you abundantly if you come back to Him and your husband.

With much agape love

YSIC

Faithie