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GerdaHannah

Going through a separation - need legal advice

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Hi,

I am a christian, my husband is not.

We are undergoing a temporary separation to sort out a few things.

We both bought a house together last year. My name is listed on the mortgage as a co-borrower. He still lives in the house we bought, I do not.

My worry is that if he does not pay back the mortgage, I will also be held responsible. I live at a different address and will not know if the bank sends me any mail about the mortgage.

I will ask him every month if he paid the mortgage, but he may lie to me. It will also not help with our reconciliation efforts if I text him every month just to ask this.

What should I do? Is there any way for me to call and ask the bank each month if he has paid the mortgage?

 

Can any of you please help me out?

 

Thanks and blessings.

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1 hour ago, GerdaHannah said:

Hi,

I am a Christian, my husband is not.

We are undergoing a temporary separation to sort out a few things.

We both bought a house together last year. My name is listed on the mortgage as a co-borrower. He still lives in the house we bought, I do not.

My worry is that if he does not pay back the mortgage, I will also be held responsible. I live at a different address and will not know if the bank sends me any mail about the mortgage.

I will ask him every month if he paid the mortgage, but he may lie to me. It will also not help with our reconciliation efforts if I text him every month just to ask this.

What should I do? Is there any way for me to call and ask the bank each month if he has paid the mortgage?

 

Can any of you please help me out?

 

Thanks and blessings.

 
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You're listed on the mortgage so yes you can stay in touch with the bank and also pay them to keep the mortgage up to date. If things go bad, say heading toward divorce, the best thing to do is not mess around. An attorney will go before a judge and force the house on the market. Let the attorney do their job. Stay out of the way and move forward.

Any equity after the sale will be distributed between you two as per any agreement you make. Checks will be cut.

Do not let him keep the house with your name on the mortgage. If he has good enough credit and pays the fee he can have your name removed but this is important for you to have a clean break. Well with this part of the breakup anyway, sad to even talk about it but these things have become a reality way too much. So sorry.

Don't mess around with this financial situation. Your right to be concerned and a divorce attorney earns their wage by putting that concern in their hands. Best advice - "Let the attorney do their job."  Houses have prolonged the pain and frustration of these situations. Cut it off quick.

And just to add that most attorney offices have paralegals to answer basic questions of your rights in situations that over the phone or even a brief appointment will cost you nothing. Better to hear it from people who deal with this every week than someone like myself. Knowing your rights and legal capabilities and hinderances is a positive thing. Call a divorce attorneys office for an appointment or see if you could just ask a few questions over the phone. There may be a listing for advice in the yellow pages. 

They won't offer legal advice on what you should do until you retain them but they will inform you of your rights and what the law says.

Edited by Zemke

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Zemke has given you some good advice.    Also, do not hesitate to call the bank at once to make sure your husband has paid the mortgage.

Sorry for this situation....I remember your husband and in-laws are Hindu and have made it very difficult for you and your mother.

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Thankyou Zemke and Debp.

I called the bank and they have told me anything my husband is mailed, I will be mailed too. I will also call them each month and check if the mortgage is being paid. If it is not paid, my husband's family (his uncles and aunts) are willing to step in and get him to pay.

I am truly grateful for your advice.

I am just a bit sad that I am disappointing God since He does not like divorce/separation.

I also have a money crunch and do not know how longer I can stay in my rented apartment. Please pray that I may grow in my job and make enough to support myself and my mother.

Blessings

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Hi, You are at India and I am not.  I haven't a clue as to any laws nor systems of responsibility at India.

May God bless you even in your struggle to sustain the basic needs of your mother and yourself. Amen.

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1 hour ago, Neighbor said:

Hi, You are at India and I am not.  I haven't a clue as to any laws nor systems of responsibility at India.

May God bless you even in your struggle to sustain the basic needs of your mother and yourself. Amen.

Hi, actually she is from India but currently living with her husband and MIL in Canada. 

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4 hours ago, Debp said:

Hi, actually she is from India but currently living with her husband and MIL in Canada. 

Thanks Debp,

Let me then amend my own post to

Hi, You are at Canada and I am not.  I haven't a clue as to any laws nor systems of responsibility at Canada.

May God bless you even in your struggle to sustain the basic needs of your mother and yourself. Amen.

 

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7 hours ago, Debp said:

Hi, actually she is from India but currently living with her husband and MIL in Canada. 

then she needs to talk to an attorney….

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