If You Wish You Didn’t Exist

[SisterWells]

1 hour ago, Fidei Defensor said:

Our God Jesus Christ is not unable to fellowship our sufferings, but has suffered all things so that He may intercede for us. Remeber He holds your tears in a bottle, “You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book.” (Psalm 56:8). That is the kind of God we serve, He fellowships in our sufferings and keeps all our tears on his book, and oneday will wipe away all tears, “He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death' or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” (Revelation 21:4) Amen. 

Fidei Defensor, Thank you for starting this thread. I feel like God will be using it to do great things.

[Fidei Defensor]

7 minutes ago, SisterWells said:

Fidei Defensor, Thank you for starting this thread. I feel like God will be using it to do great things.

You do me great honor SisterWells. In turn I give honor to God (Soli del Gloria) for stirring this topic up and into existance via The Holy Spirit. 

My hope is people read and know they are not alone in their despair, that great icons (people) of the Bible felt as they do, even our Lord Jesus in Gethsename felt the weight of despair, terror, anxiety, and fear. 

That our Lord and the peopke of the Bible pulled through the dark hours or seasons to radiate God’s glorious light and love.  

[Fidei Defensor]

1 hour ago, bornagain2011 said:

This post came at a perfect time. 

I have been gone for a little while, I started to get into the whole shadow government/hollywood pedo ring investigating stuff, I started going down that rabbit hole and I saw things that haunted me and messed me up. I was not ok for a few days and I started to realize why people get super depressed investigating that stuff. I can't handle it, so I pulled myself out of it.

But today I started peeing blood (sorry tmi), and a part of me doesn't even want to get it figured out and go to a doctor. I just sort of want to leave here and be with God. I know I should go and get myself checked out because God probably wants me to be here for my family. I love my family dearly, but sometimes I feel like I want to give my husband another chance to make a better choice in a wife  . Depressing I know.

Your feelings are normal. Paul the apostle felt the same way: 

“18 What then? Only that in every way, whether in pretense or in truth, Christ is proclaimed, and in that I rejoice. To Live Is Christ Yes, and I will rejoice,
19 for I know that through your prayers and the help of the Spirit of Jesus Christ this will turn out for my deliverance,
20 as it is my eager expectation and hope that I will not be at all ashamed, but that with full courage now as always Christ will be honored in my body, whether by life or by death.
21 For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain.
22 If I am to live in the flesh, that means fruitful labor for me. Yet which I shall choose I cannot tell.
23 I am hard pressed between the two. My desire is to depart and be with Christ, for that is far better.
24 But to remain in the flesh is more necessary on your account.
25 Convinced of this, I know that I will remain and continue with you all, for your progress and joy in the faith,
26 so that in me you may have ample cause to glory in Christ Jesus, because of my coming to you again.” (Philippians 1:18-26)

Paul wanted to go and be with Christ, but he became aware it was necessary to remain alive as long as possible to help brothers and sisters in Christ. 

I urge the same to you, that you try to live for your family and those whom you are a witness to (even those you don’t know who see your faith). 

Studying the dark side of Hollywood and the prince of this world’s machinations in media is depressing and I urge people to avoid it, and avoid getting too into demonology and nephilim studies. 

Instead fix your eyes on Christ: 

“Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God” (Hebrews 12:2)

Edited July 30, 2020 by Fidei Defensor

[Fidei Defensor]

2 hours ago, Aimes said:

Hey Sister, I'll be praying for you. 

Don't believe the lies of the enemy for another second. I heard someone recently say we should just "hang up the phone on the devil" when he is filling our head with his lies that say we're less-than, not worthy, not enough, etc. So, hang up on that devil and remind yourself that you are a daughter of the Most High. As you remind yourself of who God says you are, the devil has to hush up. The truth drowns out the lies every time. God has each of us here for a unique purpose. He alone numbers our days. So remember, if you're here, there is a work for you to do for the Kingdom.  

I'd say you should def go get checked out. Sounds like it might be a simple fix, like a UTI, but if left it could get worse. 

 

Indeed, there is only two voices other than our own, The Advocate (God The Trinity) and The Accuser (The evil one). 

The Advocate says things that comfort and convict us. 

The Accuser accuses and abuses: 

“Then I heard a loud voice shouting across the heavens, “It has come at last— salvation and power and the Kingdom of our God, and the authority of his Christ. For the accuser of our brothers and sisters has been thrown down to earth— the one who accuses them before our God day and night, And they have defeated him by the blood of the Lamb and by their testimony. And they did not love their lives so much that they were afraid to die.” (Revelation 12:10-11) 

[Debp]

4 hours ago, Henry_iain said:

To me, what is happening in this thread, is what this place should be all about in the end. When I look at the world and the chaos in the world, and I look at the hatred and intolerance around me, it dawns on me that there are so many people who might seem ok, but who are slowly dying inside from pain. The need out there is so huge. And we as the Church of Jesus Christ have to be the solution to this. And instead, unfortunately, in my experience, the church just makes things worse. The harvest is not the issue, the labourers are. I relate to art and especially music. And I listen to a song by Leeland called "Tears of the Saints." Every time I hear it I find myself wishing there was more I could do. That I could forget about all the side issues and just jump in  and begin to do something about the real needs out there. This site has to be the place where we encourage one another to good works and just generally lift each other up. 

So I say right here and now, that if you are here and you are in pain and you need someone to talk to privately or in the forums, please let me know. I am far from perfect, but I will help any way I can. And I hope I can say that goes for the rest of the regulars as well. 

Your first sentence is pure gold!    And I appreciate the rest of your post, too!  

 

4 hours ago, ChickenCoop said:

This thread has been classified Hot Topic. 

That's so great!!!

@Fidei Defensor Thanks so much for starting this great topic!   You are a real blessing here at Worthy!

[Fidei Defensor]

58 minutes ago, Debp said:

Your first sentence is pure gold!    And I appreciate the rest of your post, too!  

 

That's so great!!!

@Fidei Defensor Thanks so much for starting this great topic!   You are a real blessing here at Worthy!

You do me great honor Deb. 

I am glad the Lord is using this topic to show people they are not alone and that they matter. 

Speaking of matter: 

“All of the dreams that haven't come true
And all of the hurt that happened to you
It matters, I hope you know it matters

You felt the pain of a bitter defeat
Where the weight of the grief is more bitter than sweet
It matters, I'm telling you it matters

[Chorus:]
To the one who spoke and set the sun ablaze
To the one who stopped the storm and walked the waves
To the one who took the tree so He could say
You matter, I hope you know you matter

I know it's not easy, not saying it's fair
But close as a prayer somebody cares
You're a treasure, don't you know you're treasured

So hold your head high, wait for the dawn
Keep hanging on, your sadness will turn into laughter
Watch it turn into laughter, yeah

[Chorus]

You matter, heaven knows you matter

Let the water spill from your eyes
Let it wash the wounds of those lies
Oh, let the water spill from your eyes
All that you are, all that you’ll be
Someone put the beat in your heart so that you’ll see
You matter

[Chorus]

You matter, heaven knows you matter
You matter, I hope you know you matter
You matter, heaven knows you matter.” 

-? Matter, For King & Country, Run Wild, Live Free, Love Strong Album

Edited July 31, 2020 by Fidei Defensor

[Henry_iain]

16 hours ago, bornagain2011 said:

This post came at a perfect time. 

I have been gone for a little while, I started to get into the whole shadow government/hollywood pedo ring investigating stuff, I started going down that rabbit hole and I saw things that haunted me and messed me up. I was not ok for a few days and I started to realize why people get super depressed investigating that stuff. I can't handle it, so I pulled myself out of it.

But today I started peeing blood (sorry tmi), and a part of me doesn't even want to get it figured out and go to a doctor. I just sort of want to leave here and be with God. I know I should go and get myself checked out because God probably wants me to be here for my family. I love my family dearly, but sometimes I feel like I want to give my husband another chance to make a better choice in a wife  . Depressing I know.

Hi. So I said I wanted to add something to the great things that have been said already. 

Firstly, having worked as a social worker, I have seen things that are quite depressing. I also realised that there is no point in watching the news media too closely. because you just don't know what to believe, and mostly the news so negative that it can send you into depression just reading the front page. If you need to be informed, there are ways to do so without delving into that dark hole. But fortunately the cure is the Word of God which always brings in the light. 

 

Secondly, I can't imagine what it must be like to go through this difficult time for you. But you are valuable to God and to us. I will pray that God strengthens you. He didn't say for nothing that his strength is made perfect in our weakness. 

 

I hope this helps 

[Henry_iain]

15 hours ago, Fidei Defensor said:

My hope is people read and know they are not alone in their despair, that great icons (people) of the Bible felt as they do, even our Lord Jesus in Gethsename felt the weight of despair, terror, anxiety, and fear.

I am reminded of two videos that I think everyone should watch (I might post them in the appropriate forum)

One is a video called The Walls of Jericho. It highlights the fact that so many of the heroes in scripture faced seemingly hopeless situations but how God pulled them through. 

The second one is a song called The God Who Sees, by a lady called Nicole Mullen. It is about the fact that in our darkest places,God is the God who sees us and cares. 

[Fidei Defensor]

1 hour ago, Henry_iain said:

I am reminded of two videos that I think everyone should watch (I might post them in the appropriate forum)

One is a video called The Walls of Jericho. It highlights the fact that so many of the heroes in scripture faced seemingly hopeless situations but how God pulled them through. 

The second one is a song called The God Who Sees, by a lady called Nicole Mullen. It is about the fact that in our darkest places,God is the God who sees us and cares. 

I recommend definitely posting those in the video section of the forums, and providing a link here to those video threads. :) 

[Henry_iain]

55 minutes ago, Fidei Defensor said:

I recommend definitely posting those in the video section of the forums, and providing a link here to those video threads.

Great idea. So I started a topic.  Enjoy