Getting Along With God's People

[Michael37]

Some of God's People are easy to get along with, others are difficult.

This is something I have been greatly exercised by.

I have found Romans 12:18 welcome relief in the fray because it implies it is not always possible to get along with certain people and therefore not entirely due to one's own fault as the devil might try to persuade.

Rom 12:18  If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men.

My wife is part of a ladies group that periodically has the husbands join in, mainly for socialising with a quiz, or board game, or watching YouTube clips, and always with a meal. While it can be a lot of fun it comes with the expectation that we will all get along with each other because we are all God's People. One of the ladies is a caregiver for people with disabilities and she brings one or two of them along so that is an added dimension that my wife and I are familiar with, having done the same thing in the past.

Christians who are deaf, or blind, or schizoid, or Asperger, or early Alzheimer and needy in some way, these we have befriended and cared for according to the need and our ability to help. These people can be difficult and demanding at times but worth ministering to under the anointing of the Holy Spirit.

It was insensitive of me to upset a man who identified here on Worthy with Asperger Syndrome and took exception to my mention of the elders confirming a call on my wife and I to minister to the unloved and unlovely, and it occurs to me that insensitivity can be something that makes getting along with people difficult. My apologies to him, now gone, for that insensitive post.

Back to my wife's ladies group and it's dynamic. Three couples are immigrants with South African and Asian ethnicities, once again, not an issue, but one of these ladies actually started the group to do craftwork which she is very good at and has taught the others to a high standard. However, when the other ladies decided to incorporate Bible Studies in their meetings it became obvious this lady was not an appropriate leader as she is not well-versed in Scripture and prone to the light use of profanity, something which I have addressed with her and them as a group.

The rub is that potentially I have now caused humiliation and made myself a target for all sorts of criticism, since unfortunately there is a strong culture of leadership prestige in the congregation and denomination this group is a part of. There is also a defacto leader who is very nice but dominating and controlling as well. My wife has to stand up to her on occasions.

1Pe 2:19-21  For this is commendable, if because of conscience toward God one endures grief, suffering wrongfully.  (20)  For what credit is it if, when you are beaten for your faults, you take it patiently? But when you do good and suffer, if you take it patiently, this is commendable before God.  (21)  For to this you were called, because Christ also suffered for us, leaving us an example, that you should follow His steps:

I hope you are not finding me too difficult to get along with . . . if so we maybe can work something out in the spirit of meekness.
 

[Marathoner]

I'm grateful for those challenges which the Lord sets before us knowing that I'm not alone in facing the trial. Indeed, let it never be said that Christ intends for us to dwell in complacency while we toil in this world. Like silver is refined and gold is tested in the furnace, so too are we refined and tested by the same Spirit of God who conforms us to the image of the Son from glory... to glory. 

I'm sorry to learn of that man's offense, @Michael37, but I'm assured that no ill-will nor offense was conveyed by your honest accounting of the truth. I enjoy reading your contributions on the forum so I can't imagine you would offend anyone knowingly (or willingly). I've been sorely tested by the revelation of the Spirit particularly as He shed the light of truth upon my own conduct not by way of accusation but rather, conviction. I learned the truth behind these words written by the Psalmist,

It is good for me that I was afflicted,
So that I may learn Your statutes.
(Psalm 119:71 NASB)

I share something in common with that man: I'm on the autistic spectrum though most would never suspect this of me. The Lord Himself revealed the truth of this through the agency of a seasoned professional who came to know me over the course of some years; in a "eureka" moment my friend arrived at the truth which had eluded me for so very long. No one --- not my parents, teachers at school, nor the U.S. Army --- had a clue. This occurred not long after the Lord delivered me from the shadow of death.

Yes, the woman whom our Father brought me to in that wilderness was a retired Special Education professional with over 40 years of experience. She was brilliant, someone who taught children who couldn't speak how to say their first words... unresponsive children how to come to life... this was a talent which our Father in heaven bestowed upon her. There was much, much more to what transpired than standing between her and the gun of a wicked man who vowed to kill her that day. God's Truth is eternal, more astonishing than our meager minds can possibly grasp. 

Why did Christ Jesus choose me, the least of men? I struggled with this terribly, my friend, especially in light of His revelation that I am decidedly different from my fellow man in fundamental ways. I progressed through stages of this struggle over the course of those two years which the Spirit of the Lord renewed my mind, step by agonizing step, in fulfillment of His promise to restore everything I had lost. At first I was astonished beyond words, stunned by the hand of Almighty God revealed when all was lost and I wandered through that strange twilight of life and death. "The shadow of death" is a fitting phrase indeed. 

Ah, but then I began to experience a smoldering anger at the Lord who spared me from an end which I felt was entirely justified, given the revelation of my predicament and the course of my seemingly senseless life. Autism was like a prison sentence! I had longed for death but Jesus Christ denied this of me; why, when folly and error were all I was capable of achieving in this life? I was stricken by terrible blindness, incapable of conceiving the mind of God who fashioned me by His hand.

I am precisely whom the Lord created me to be, disabilities and all. It wasn't until the Lord, pleased with my obedience at the conclusion of those two years, baptized me in His Holy Spirit that the abundance of revelation opened like a scroll before these eyes. My heart was illuminated with Truth and I saw the manifold ways in which our Father in heaven blessed me over the long years, preserving me for that day when I would forsake my life to the glory of His Son. 

I was born so the work of Jesus Christ might be manifested in me. 

I had lost my mother of flesh and so our Father gave me one in the person of my dear friend, a woman who loved me unconditionally even in light of my flaws and frailty. She had lost her only son six days before I was born and so He gave me to her in like manner, to stand as her son in the darkest of times. Thus God's Truth is eternal and glorious beyond words to behold, veiled to these eyes of flesh but abundantly revealed to the heart which beats for Christ. 

Forgive me for the lengthy post but I was greatly moved by the heart for the Lord inherent in your words, Michael. I, too, have a heart for the afflicted which is surely given to us by our Father through the Spirit of Christ. This world views something like autism as a predicament but the truth stands at odds against the condemnation of those who don't understand how we are fearfully and wonderfully made. 

Your heart toward your brother is a testament of your heart before the Lord. I have been blessed to meet on Worthy as it were.    

[Speks]

Hello Michael. Thanks for this reminder. Real faith in action means so much more than all the theory and talk! A refreshingly welcome down-to-earth post.

[Michael37]

20 hours ago, Marathoner said:

I share something in common with that man: I'm on the autistic spectrum though most would never suspect this of me.

Hi Marathoner, Your posts are well written and not so long as to be tedious reading. I hope you benefit from the appropriate sharing of your testimony here and also from the virtual fellowship that continues to develop.

There seem to be quite a few people with traits that cause speculation about their being on the Autism Spectrum, but since we are all on the "human spectrum" it becomes a question of guidance in how involved we become in other people's lives.

I particularly enjoy the Book of Daniel with its dreams and visions, some of which were very troubling for him, but one thing that stands out is the intensity with which he sought God. I once came across a teaching to the effect that if we are moving in our gifting it will be effortless and we will remain fresh and invigorated but reading about Daniel and the other prophets it occurs that their experiences don't support this so I don't buy into it.  Daniel was told to keep a lot of disturbing things to himself and needed time to recover after the astonishing scenes he saw. How long it took for him to resume his normal duties we don't know, but apparently the people around him didn't understand what was wrong with him. 

Dan 8:26-27  And the vision of the evening and the morning which was told is true: wherefore shut thou up the vision; for it shall be for many days.  (27)  And I Daniel fainted, and was sick certain days; afterward I rose up, and did the king's business; and I was astonished at the vision, but none understood it.

Sometimes we are shown things we cannot speak about and I am very wary of rushing to spill these things to others like young Joseph did with his brothers. Instead, unless otherwise directed by the Lord, I believe it better to wait for events to unfold in God's timing even though we have some insight and forewarning of them.

Psa 119:104-105  Through Your precepts I get understanding; Therefore I hate every false way.  (105)  Your word is a lamp to my feet And a light to my path.

[JTC]

On 10/28/2020 at 6:17 PM, Michael37 said:

My wife has to stand up to her on occasions.

Bravo to your wife. Not just for standing up to that one woman, but for running the group that reaches out to those who are sick, unfortunate, or who made many mistakes when they were young and have changed and now need companionship. Jesus did in fact call us to do this. We have to be different from the world. If anyone disagrees ask yourself if you consider the average person to be like salt, or like light of the world, because Jesus said we have to be like that. So bravo to your wife.

[Michael37]

5 hours ago, JTC said:

Bravo to your wife. Not just for standing up to that one woman, but for running the group that reaches out to those who are sick, unfortunate, or who made many mistakes when they were young and have changed and now need companionship. Jesus did in fact call us to do this. We have to be different from the world. If anyone disagrees ask yourself if you consider the average person to be like salt, or like light of the world, because Jesus said we have to be like that. So bravo to your wife.

Hi JTC, Thanks for your comments. Just to clarify, my wife doesn't run her group but they do benefit from her many years of experience and service. As she is 71 now I have asked her not to take on as much as she has done in the past.

[JTC]

15 hours ago, Michael37 said:

Hi JTC, Thanks for your comments. Just to clarify, my wife doesn't run her group but they do benefit from her many years of experience and service.

   Sorry I misunderstood you.