Upset over son's school admission

[GerdaHannah]

Hi,

I had to deal with yet another setback today. I live in Toronto with my son, and we have 2 types of school here - regular public school and Catholic public school.

I tried to get my son into Catholic Public School so that he will have exposure to prayer and have a faith based education.

Turns out, one of the parents or the child has to be Catholic, and I cannot convert to one because my son will be taken away. And I do not want to be coerced into converting anyway, because a piece of paper doesn't decide my relationship with God.

I am pretty upset and angry. I have Catholic friends who do not even pray and are completely worldly, and their kids get a chance at a faith based education, but my son won't. I am almost tempted to give up Christianity altogether if this is the way people are. I am doing everything I can to join a good group of Christians, but everywhere we go, we get kicked out. I do not know how much more I can take being excluded before giving up religion altogether.

Thanks,

GerdaHannah

[Marilyn C]

1 hour ago, GerdaHannah said:

Hi,

I had to deal with yet another setback today. I live in Toronto with my son, and we have 2 types of school here - regular public school and Catholic public school.

I tried to get my son into Catholic Public School so that he will have exposure to prayer and have a faith based education.

Turns out, one of the parents or the child has to be Catholic, and I cannot convert to one because my son will be taken away. And I do not want to be coerced into converting anyway, because a piece of paper doesn't decide my relationship with God.

I am pretty upset and angry. I have Catholic friends who do not even pray and are completely worldly, and their kids get a chance at a faith based education, but my son won't. I am almost tempted to give up Christianity altogether if this is the way people are. I am doing everything I can to join a good group of Christians, but everywhere we go, we get kicked out. I do not know how much more I can take being excluded before giving up religion altogether.

Thanks,

GerdaHannah

Hi Gerda,

I can understand why you are upset as you had your heart set on that school for your son. Now, we know that our heavenly Father knows all things and perhaps He sees things differently from you. Perhaps after all the other school may turn out the best for your son.

Remember this world is damaged and the people in it too. Thus we need to more and more trust the Lord to guide us, even when it is different than we wanted. In time I think you will see why the Lord has directed you there.

Also, are you remembering to thank the Lord for what he has done in your life - Jesus` sacrifice for you, a lovely son who loves you, shelter, food, clothing, friends, family....

praying, Marilyn.

[teddyv]

1 hour ago, GerdaHannah said:

Hi,

I had to deal with yet another setback today. I live in Toronto with my son, and we have 2 types of school here - regular public school and Catholic public school.

I tried to get my son into Catholic Public School so that he will have exposure to prayer and have a faith based education.

Turns out, one of the parents or the child has to be Catholic, and I cannot convert to one because my son will be taken away. And I do not want to be coerced into converting anyway, because a piece of paper doesn't decide my relationship with God.

I am pretty upset and angry. I have Catholic friends who do not even pray and are completely worldly, and their kids get a chance at a faith based education, but my son won't. I am almost tempted to give up Christianity altogether if this is the way people are. I am doing everything I can to join a good group of Christians, but everywhere we go, we get kicked out. I do not know how much more I can take being excluded before giving up religion altogether.

Thanks,

GerdaHannah

There are Protestant Christian schools available (my sister sent her kids to one in Barrie), but they will require tuition since they are not publicly funded like the public or Catholic schools. I'm not sure what the tuition looks like in Ontario. I'm in BC and we get partial student funding (but no capital funding).

 

ETA: For example Willowdale Christian school is part of the Christian Schools International, which our school in BC is part of as well. You can probably fid a list of member schools from their website. Tuition at this school is about 11,000 per year for one child.

Edited January 9, 2023 by teddyv
added info

[Neighbor]

Hi,

It seems reasonable to me that a RCC school will insist  on parenting that  is compliant to  RCC doctrines. And it is probably a blessing for a child to not be put in a situation where  their schooling is based on a different belief system than their home  operates under. 

Having been involved in the USA with two Christian schools, one that allowed anyone to basically dump their kid off for schooling regardless of what the parent or guardian practiced or lived as a lifestyle, and the other that insisted the home life be in synch with the school's teaching, I will share that  it was often an unpleasant jungle at the one where anyone could just dump off their child without living the life taught at the school. The other was not at all that way.

Why not have home study and sharing of the Bible; perhaps by seeking out the various AWANA groups online, searching out which ones have online user friendly tools for Bible training at home?

[GerdaHannah]

44 minutes ago, teddyv said:

There are Protestant Christian schools available (my sister sent her kids to one in Barrie), but they will require tuition since they are not publicly funded like the public or Catholic schools. I'm not sure what the tuition looks like in Ontario. I'm in BC and we get partial student funding (but no capital funding).

 

ETA: For example Willowdale Christian school is part of the Christian Schools International, which our school in BC is part of as well. You can probably fid a list of member schools from their website. Tuition at this school is about 11,000 per year for one child.

Thankyou teddy, unfortunately I cannot afford the fees. Maybe someday if my son qualifies for a scholarship, we will get in.

[GerdaHannah]

7 minutes ago, Neighbor said:

Hi,

It seems reasonable to me that a RCC school will insist  on parenting that  is compliant to  RCC doctrines. And it is probably a blessing for a child to not be put in a situation where  their schooling is based on a different belief system than their home  operates under. 

Having been involved in the USA with two Christian schools, one that allowed anyone to basically dump their kid off for schooling regardless of what the parent or guardian practiced or lived as a lifestyle, and the other that insisted the home life be in synch with the school's teaching, I will share that  it was often an unpleasant jungle at the one where anyone could just dump off their child without living the life taught at the school. Th eother was not at all that way.

 

Why not have home study and sharing of the Bible; perhaps by seeking out the various AWANA groups online, searching out which ones have online user friendly tools for Bible training at home?

Hi Neighbour,

The trouble here is that we practice Christianity/prayer/love for Jesus at home, we just cannot get baptized due to a lot of other troubles. I wanted my son to have the exposure to prayer and faith at school also.

In contrast, my Catholic friends do not even pray. But because they have the baptism certificate, their kids get in.

I would have been okay with being rejected if they had spoken to us, even over phone and asked us if we intended to have a similar prayer atmosphere at home. We were rejected right off the bat just because we were not baptized. Whereas my friends kids who just had a non-practising Catholic parent got in.

I am not blaming their intent - they want people who are truly invested in Christ. I am only questioning their methods - deciding to take a student in based on a piece of paper instead of finding out if the family truly worships the Lord doesn't seem ok to me.

[teddyv]

15 minutes ago, GerdaHannah said:

Thankyou teddy, unfortunately I cannot afford the fees. Maybe someday if my son qualifies for a scholarship, we will get in.

If there is such a school nearby, make an inquiry about any financial assistance that may be available. I know that the Christian schools our kids have been part of will offer it. Sometimes certain churches may also offer support for Christian school tuition. Our church will take periodic collections intentionally meant to support those desiring Christian education but may have financial shortfalls.

[Neighbor]

Sorry for your trouble in finding affordable Christian based education.  it is absolutely  an expensive proposition.

The same problems are coming to a crisis point at the USA. There is little way for most families to afford the full cost of a private school anymore. Most all Christian schools have gotten suckered into accepting  federal or state grant moneys of various sorts. And now the trap has been sprung with government mandates for having LGBT teachers, anddemanding weird bathroom rules, etc.

 

The schools that started recruiting Chinese families to ship their kids to the USA for schooling and having churched families house them too,are now in trouble. Some schools are totally dependent upon that  for their staffing payroll! And of course that is now being closely monitored and the squeeze is put on that program, causing schools that got involved to be in great financial jeopardy today.

It just is not going to get easier. There will likely soon be so much pressure on us all that Christian based schooling will have to be underground or homeschooling alone.

Again, sorry that it  is affecting you and your family. 

 

[Debp]

7 hours ago, GerdaHannah said:

I am almost tempted to give up Christianity altogether if this is the way people are. I am doing everything I can to join a good group of Christians, but everywhere we go, we get kicked out. I do not know how much more I can take being excluded before giving up religion altogether.

It's not about religion, it should be about faith....a personal faith in Christ.   Maybe it's better that your son will not be indoctrinated into Catholicism.

I went to public schools and I turned out ok.   However, I always had a wonderful example of faith in Christ from my mother and my grandmother.   My mother in the midst of her woes was always praying and believed the Bible.   She sent me to Sunday School and church.   Sometimes we would go to special worship services together.   This is the kind of thing that will help influence your son towards the Lord.

I have some cousins who were sent to Catholic school.   They turned into very secular people, with no thought of God.    No interest in spiritual things or church.   Only the secular things in life mattered to them.

[existential mabel]

My great nephew went to a Catholic School for all of a few weeks and his parents are not Catholic or his grandparents. This was not deemed necessary. My great Nephew left his previous school because they were holding back his education ..long story…anyway the Catholic school was chosen as they have discipline but also they didn’t insist he needed to involved in the religious side.

This school also was found very wanting, my great nephew was very unhappy..the only good thing he said was the food lol. he is now home educated and is a happier boy by far..and is advanced for his age. It seems that Primary Schools are ok and then when they move up to Big school over here, in the UK, they have Academy schools. Where anything goes, there is no discipline and very little respect…and these children are tomorrow’s adults it doesn’t bear thinking about.

Edited January 10, 2023 by existential mabel