farouk Posted October 31, 2023 Group: Royal Member Followers: 8 Topic Count: 26 Topics Per Day: 0.05 Content Count: 6,561 Content Per Day: 12.11 Reputation: 3,353 Days Won: 31 Joined: 11/18/2022 Status: Offline Share Posted October 31, 2023 On 10/27/2023 at 5:51 AM, Debp said: Do you find it hard to forgive others? I forgive easily. I guess I just take the words of Jesus and the Bible about forgiving very simply....and just do it. People who will not forgive only hurt themselves. It can cause bitterness within a person and a lack of peace because the Holy Spirit is grieved within them. 30And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. 31Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. 32And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you. Ephesians 4:30-32 @Debp Great passage there; Ephesians is often thought of as being highly doctrinal - which it is - but passages such as this are also highly practical............ cc @Renskedejonge 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marathoner Posted October 31, 2023 Group: Royal Member Followers: 16 Topic Count: 73 Topics Per Day: 0.05 Content Count: 10,305 Content Per Day: 7.11 Reputation: 13,334 Days Won: 99 Joined: 05/24/2020 Status: Offline Share Posted October 31, 2023 7 hours ago, Renskedejonge said: I forgive because I have to. When I can't I chose to and let God do it, but I'm not as dumb anymore as I used to be. If they put a knife in your back and don't say sorry it's often because they're not sorry and if you then forgive forget ladida lets be friends again and then they do it again and you're totally surprised, no I don't do that anymore. If someone is not sorry I forgive anyway but I also stay away and protect my kids. That's wise. To forgive means we hold nothing against the trespasser; to bless them means we do just that. However, there's nothing wrong with avoiding situations where harm will be done again either to ourselves or like you say, children. I continue to avoid my surviving family members except for one --- my youngest sister --- because we reconciled and she has not sought to harm me in any way since that time. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Debp Posted November 1, 2023 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 52 Topic Count: 1,026 Topics Per Day: 0.15 Content Count: 12,364 Content Per Day: 1.80 Reputation: 16,395 Days Won: 92 Joined: 07/19/2005 Status: Offline Author Share Posted November 1, 2023 7 hours ago, Renskedejonge said: I did notice that those with narcissistic traits didn't have the greatest upbringing, which makes it easier to forgive. My mom was always sweet. They were abused as kids. That is an interesting point. Sometimes one can note that how the abuser/non-forgiver acts is how they were treated themselves. And so they often lash out in the same way. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Starise Posted November 1, 2023 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 13 Topic Count: 279 Topics Per Day: 0.21 Content Count: 13,119 Content Per Day: 9.67 Reputation: 13,643 Days Won: 149 Joined: 08/26/2020 Status: Offline Share Posted November 1, 2023 16 hours ago, Renskedejonge said: I did notice that those with narcissistic traits didn't have the greatest upbringing, which makes it easier to forgive. My mom was always sweet. They were abused as kids. You have a good heart in looking for the reasons behind why some people are the way they are, and I'm sure some carry childhood burdens that affect them even today. Some people raised poor make it a life mission to be rich at any cost, and while not true, they seen money as the lacking element in their happiness. Rich people often get prideful and entitled, almost as if they think they are a cut above everyone else. People who were abused by hypocrite religious figures are likely to become atheists and Christian haters. Although there are no atheists, only those who have been successful at self delusion. Many times sexually abused people will try to repress that and deal with it internally, which can come out in various ways. A narcisstic person may be trying to overcorrect for an inadequacy in their self image. So they fight to be "top dog" to feel like they are somebody, reminds me of an old joke that pickup drivers who like to tailgate are trying to make up for a lack of male anatomy. Anything that makes a person feel inadequate or less of a person can trigger various behaviors. The sad thing is that all of this stuff people go after thinking it will complete them, never does. Some of the most miserable people alive are wealthy people who have figured out none of it makes anyone feel better inside, or those who have reached the top of some ladder only to find it's lonely and cold at the top. Some think finding the right friends will make them happy, when in reality even the best of people will fail us. I love my wife who recently told me she was honored to be my wife. I think maybe she needs theraphy 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
farouk Posted November 2, 2023 Group: Royal Member Followers: 8 Topic Count: 26 Topics Per Day: 0.05 Content Count: 6,561 Content Per Day: 12.11 Reputation: 3,353 Days Won: 31 Joined: 11/18/2022 Status: Offline Share Posted November 2, 2023 @Renskedejonge Spending time in prayer and the Scriptures is always so valuable. The world will easily crowd out such priorities. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Who me Posted November 2, 2023 Group: Royal Member Followers: 5 Topic Count: 17 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 3,300 Content Per Day: 1.71 Reputation: 1,686 Days Won: 0 Joined: 01/27/2019 Status: Offline Share Posted November 2, 2023 This is all very nice, but is totally unscriptural. Our example is always that of God and of Jesus. The old testament teaches clearly that the Isrealites were to repent of their sin and offer an animal sacrifice. God's repeatedly states, " If my people will turn ( repent ) from their wicked ways and pray. Then I will hear from heaven, forgive their sins and heal their land." Jesus being crucified, didn't forgive, but prayed for them asking God to forgive them. As Jesus taught once there is repentance we Must forgive. See the parable of the unjust servant. He'd pleaded for mercy a d been granted it, yet when another servant pleaded for mercy he did not forgive. There was repentance followed by forgiveness. We are to forgive as Jesus forgave us. How many of you did not repent of your sins, or did you all say sorry! That is how we are to forgive. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Starise Posted November 2, 2023 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 13 Topic Count: 279 Topics Per Day: 0.21 Content Count: 13,119 Content Per Day: 9.67 Reputation: 13,643 Days Won: 149 Joined: 08/26/2020 Status: Offline Share Posted November 2, 2023 48 minutes ago, Who me said: This is all very nice, but is totally unscriptural. Our example is always that of God and of Jesus. The old testament teaches clearly that the Isrealites were to repent of their sin and offer an animal sacrifice. God's repeatedly states, " If my people will turn ( repent ) from their wicked ways and pray. Then I will hear from heaven, forgive their sins and heal their land." Jesus being crucified, didn't forgive, but prayed for them asking God to forgive them. As Jesus taught once there is repentance we Must forgive. See the parable of the unjust servant. He'd pleaded for mercy a d been granted it, yet when another servant pleaded for mercy he did not forgive. There was repentance followed by forgiveness. We are to forgive as Jesus forgave us. How many of you did not repent of your sins, or did you all say sorry! That is how we are to forgive. Maybe this is not the intention, but I think it comes off very judgmental in tone. None of us are perfect and a few of us admitted some of our struggles. Yes we are to forgive. It isn't always easy. BUt any true believer will foregive as Christ forgave. Also note, foregiveness isn't always instantaneous. If someone walks up to you and slaps you hard aross the face the first inclination isn't to forgive. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Who me Posted November 3, 2023 Group: Royal Member Followers: 5 Topic Count: 17 Topics Per Day: 0.01 Content Count: 3,300 Content Per Day: 1.71 Reputation: 1,686 Days Won: 0 Joined: 01/27/2019 Status: Offline Share Posted November 3, 2023 21 hours ago, Starise said: I think it comes off very judgmental in tone. Yes you are correct, what I wrote is judgemental. 21 hours ago, Starise said: BUt any true believer will foregive as Christ forgave. It is judgemental because you write one thing and talk about doing something Jesus never did. Let's be clear. Jesus/God only forgave those who repented. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FJK Posted November 3, 2023 Group: Royal Member Followers: 0 Topic Count: 43 Topics Per Day: 0.10 Content Count: 3,349 Content Per Day: 7.63 Reputation: 1,305 Days Won: 1 Joined: 03/01/2023 Status: Offline Share Posted November 3, 2023 25 minutes ago, Who me said: It is judgemental because you write one thing and talk about doing something Jesus never did. Let's be clear. Jesus/God only forgave those who repented. Just curious: When Jesus said from the cross “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.” was he only calling the Fathers forgiveness for those who were repenting at the time or was he asking forgives for all those involved in crucifying him? If they did not know what they were doing, why would they be repenting? Also, was calling the Father's somehow not the result of his own forgiveness of them? I think these are important questions to consider. 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neighbor Posted November 3, 2023 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 18 Topic Count: 961 Topics Per Day: 0.35 Content Count: 13,701 Content Per Day: 5.04 Reputation: 9,102 Days Won: 6 Joined: 12/04/2016 Status: Offline Birthday: 03/03/1885 Share Posted November 3, 2023 1 hour ago, Who me said: Let's be clear. Jesus/God only forgave those who repented. Perhaps clearer is that Jesus did look out at all that were there mocking him even as they tried to kill him by crucifixion, and He did say to his Father, forgive them for they know not what they are doing. He further declared, no one takes my life, I give it willingly. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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