A feeling beyond sadness.

[Datan]

I'm really sorry to all those people I've offended and/or ticked off and/or confused and/or annoyed with my views on this site. I realize I'm not always right -- more to the point, I am always almost wrong. But right now I'm asking for help. I need help. I need ... that's just the thing ... I don't know what I need at all.

I've explain to some of you how my father is an alcoholic, and I can't deal with it anymore. I really at my wit's end.

I hate his addiction, not him. I know the difference well enough, but it's just that I can't deal with the constant anxious lurch in the house, or the tension always rising -- the stress is really getting to me. I'm the point where I'm constantly snapping at people because I'm so off beat. I'm either always on guard against his moods, or trying to tell myself that I'm living a normal life, with normal people, and everything is okay.

Everything is not okay. Everything is very, very, very wrong.

I don't know if anyone can really understand what that feeling is like -- to know no peace within your house is the worst feeling possible. One's home is supposed to be a safe haven against the rest of the world, but, for me, it's the complete opposite. I feel safer outside where I don't know anyone, and because they're strangers, they can't hurt me.

You see, if I distance myself enough from other people, then I can't get hurt. Then I'm safe from whatever possibility of pain there is.

It's so lonely that way, though.

And that's why I'm asking for help. I don't know what it is I need, but whatever could help, I'm open to suggestions -- or prayer if you can.

Please help me and my family.

Thanks.

Lord bless.

-Datan.

[Scarletprayers]

I'll be praying for you................

[rtwo]

Prayer is a good place to start... and I will do so for you.

YOu may even want to ask the mods to move this into that forum (or else the advice forum).

Pray first for your own attitude on the subject; that you become a conduit of God's grace. Pray for your father, that He learns the reality and freedom of Christ. Pray for your family.

Let God handle the "what to do" part... He'll let you know when it's necessary.

[Datan]

I'll be praying for you................

Thanks, Scarlet.

I appreciate it a lot.

[Datan]

Prayer is a good place to start... and I will do so for you.

YOu may even want to ask the mods to move this into that forum (or else the advice forum).

Pray first for your own attitude on the subject; that you become a conduit of God's grace. Pray for your father, that He learns the reality and freedom of Christ. Pray for your family.

Let God handle the "what to do" part... He'll let you know when it's necessary.

That's a good idea. I will.

And thank you for the prayers and the advice, actually. I probably wouldn't of thought of praying for that ... but, really, thanks again.

[Datan]

I will definitely be praying for you Datan. . .

Thanks a lot. I truly hold that dear.

I shall pray that thanks to the Lord.

[Fraught]

I understand exactly what you mean! What helped me is remembering that the situation IS temporary and the situation is not your fault. I can also tell you from experience that every time you tell yourself that 'it shouldn't be this way' it will make you feel worse. Of course it shouldn't be this way. But It is what it is. AND it is temporary and it is not your fault.

Psalm 139: 8If I ascend up into heaven, thou art there: if I make my bed in hell, behold, thou art there. 9If I take the wings of the morning, and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea; 10Even there shall thy hand lead me, and thy right hand shall hold me.

[kari21]

"Cast your burden upon the LORD and He will sustain you; He will never allow the righteous to be shaken" (Psalm 55:22)

Hon, let it go and give it all to God.

"Casting all your care upon him; for he careth for you" (I Pet. 5:7).

"Take your burden to the Lord and leave it there.

If you trust and never doubt,

He will surely bring you out;

Take your burden to the Lord and leave it there.

Singing I go along life

[Scarletprayers]

I understand exactly what you mean! What helped me is remembering that the situation IS temporary and the situation is not your fault. I can also tell you from experience that every time you tell yourself that 'it shouldn't be this way' it will make you feel worse. Of course it shouldn't be this way. But It is what it is. AND it is temporary and it is not your fault.

Psalm 139: 8If I ascend up into heaven, thou art there: if I make my bed in hell, behold, thou art there. 9If I take the wings of the morning, and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea; 10Even there shall thy hand lead me, and thy right hand shall hold me.

Excellent post Fraught, and very true!

[Northern lass]

Datan, living with an alcohol puts an enormous strain on the family. I know because one of my husband's relatives was one. There are support groups for the families of alcoholics here in the UK and I am sure in other countries too. Maybe you can find one where you are.

Praying for you!