seeing someone

[thereaperman]

if i could feel god or feel some support or love during this the worst time in my life i wouldnt be out there seaking it in human form. all i know is im one big nasty mess right now and shes the one that holds me and comforts me when it all gets too much. and maybe satan is rubbing his hands in glea but i feel so dam deserted and alone right now with nothing being garenteed for the future, not matter how hard i pray, or cry or try and try to get this all right in my head its just not happening, nothing is working. maybe im not the best christian in the world, ive never professed to be. i dunno maybe im not cut out for the christian life style, or to fully live my life in a christian way. im alone and scared and found some comfort in the worst time of my life, is that really so selfish?

[Guest mcm42]

or is this just a test ive failed flat out becuase im looking for something so desperately in a time of crisis

Wow, I hear ya man. I think you said it right above. You may be looking so hard and not finding it.

It's not easy, I'll definatly be praying for you... God bless you, if you need simply to talk, e-mail me, whatever the case, know your in my prayers.

God Bless

[Guest LadyC]

i didn't see anyone "casting stones". i saw members responding to his questions and answering them with biblical truth and wisdom. i saw members telling him that God would provide the comfort he needs if he would allow Him to.

[thereaperman]

so if i stop sleeping with her and finding comfort in the only person i have right now, god going to stop wiping out 4 members of my family within the next few years? hes going to cure my dads terminal cancer, my grandmas MS my uncles cancer and sort my life out. yeah coz me sleeping with someone right now is the most screwed up thing about the mess that i am right now.

[artsylady]

hes going to cure my dads terminal cancer, my grandmas MS my uncles cancer and sort my life out. yeah coz me sleeping with someone right now is the most screwed up thing about the mess that i am right now.

God may not heal your family members but if you put your trust in Him he will make you stronger. He will carry you through your trials. He will also bless you in other ways if you are faithful to his will. If you have a problem trusting Him, tell him so, and ask Him for help in all of these areas. He won't disappoint.

[Guest Calamity]

so if i stop sleeping with her and finding comfort in the only person i have right now, god going to stop wiping out 4 members of my family within the next few years? hes going to cure my dads terminal cancer, my grandmas MS my uncles cancer and sort my life out. yeah coz me sleeping with someone right now is the most screwed up thing about the mess that i am right now.

reaperman, I'm so sorry about your familie's sicknesses, and the way you are feeling also. But, (there's always a 'but'), doing something you know is wrong, is not going to make things better.

I don't know how old you are, or if you're in college or school or working, or what, but I'll tell you what happened to my son. He's 18, almost 19 now. He graduated Cum Laude from H.S., a year early, was in his Sophomore year of college, 4.0 GPA, and scholarship offers coming in right and left, and felt called to be an Evangelist ... then he got a girlfriend. Not that just having a girlfriend is a bad thing, but he did what you are doing and they got pregnant.

Now, instead of winding up his 2nd year of college and deciding which scholarship offer to choose, he is working graveyard shifts at a factory here, barely making ends meet. He'll be a dad soon, and that's one thing that can come from acting married when you are not. Having sex with someone outside of marriage is a serious thing, and is not going to make things any better for you.

You can have a trusting, confiding relationship with someone who you can talk with and feel comfortable with without having sex. Just my 2 cents worth here.

[thereaperman]

i have asked for help. ive been crying on my bed night after night asking for help. i am getting nothing. and finding someone who acctually stops me wanting to kill myself is so terrible right now? i cant feel god right now and making love to someone is whats so wrong in my life right now.....

im on empty and theres no sign of recharging.....

:'(

[Nicks Girl]

I totally can sympathize with what you're saying. I love my fiance ALOT, and vice versa, and it's hard, not being married.

But Premarital sex is STILL wrong, no matter how good it feels, or how justifiable it may seem. There's no excuse for it. There are consequences for your actions. You say you can't feel God, you don't feel close to God.

Because you need to WANT to be close to God, and have a restored relationship with Him. If you are still resisting it, you can't get back to where you need to be. You have to surrender your life back to Christ.

Don't know what else to say, just God bless you.

[artsylady]

You mentioned going to counselling. Did you go? Did you find yourself a church that you are comfortable in? There are many people who will tell you not to kill yourself. I am one of them. Stop listening to all the lies of the devil. He enjoys seeing you the way you are - defeated, depressed, hopeless. The reality of the situation is that the devil is scared. You are calling out to God and asking for help from God's people. KEEP DOING IT. There is a light at the end of the tunnel and the devil knows it. He continues to put negative and bad thoughts in your head. Don't let him do this to you anymore. You need some help so get it now. Don't run to that girl for help. If she slept with you already she needs some help herself. She is also a desperate person. She is what they call a co-dependant. She has a need to help you - to be the rescuer. She has a need to fix the problems of others. It is not a healthy need. She is ignoring the problems in her own life by centering them on you. She also could use some self-esteem counselling or something.