"stephen ministers"

[Guest LadyC]

i went with some other people from church to what i THOUGHT was a four hour workshop on grief counseling today. i don't think any of us realized that this $15 "workshop" was going to be quite what it turned out to be. i felt like we'd just sat through 3 hours of an infomercial followed by one hour of interaction that taught us absolutely ZILCH about grief counseling.

i do think that the premise of the ministry (not the workshop) is very good, and hope our church does put together a similar ministry, but i really hope they DON'T buy what this one was selling... basically they spent three of the four hours talking about the ministry which they profit off of. the church has to pay nearly $2000 to become a "stephens ministry" affiliate (or whatever they call it), plus it requires at least one person, preferably two or more, to fly to dallas (the closest location) for a week long training course, at a cost of over $1000 bucks per person (not including airfare), plus then THOSE individuals would have to come back and train individuals within the church, at a cost of $50 per person.

anyway, this is apparently a ministry that is set up in churches of all denominations, so i'm sure someone here has it in their church, and i wanted to get some feedback on how well it is working.

[redwing]

this is a new one on me.

[Guest LadyC]

here's a blurb from their website redwing...

Introduction to Stephen Ministry

The Stephen Series is a complete system for training and organizing lay people to provide one-to-one Christian care to hurting people in and around your congregation.

The Stephen Series provides congregations with the structure, training, and resources to set up and administer a complete system for lay caring ministry (called Stephen Ministry) in the congregation. In Stephen Ministry congregations, lay caregivers (called Stephen Ministers) provide one-to-one Christian care to the bereaved, hospitalized, terminally ill, separated, divorced, unemployed, relocated, and others facing a crisis or life challenge. Stephen Ministry helps pastors and congregations provide quality caring ministry for as long as people need it.

[Guest man]

here's a blurb from their website redwing...

Introduction to Stephen Ministry

The Stephen Series is a complete system for training and organizing lay people to provide one-to-one Christian care to hurting people in and around your congregation.

The Stephen Series provides congregations with the structure, training, and resources to set up and administer a complete system for lay caring ministry (called Stephen Ministry) in the congregation. In Stephen Ministry congregations, lay caregivers (called Stephen Ministers) provide one-to-one Christian care to the bereaved, hospitalized, terminally ill, separated, divorced, unemployed, relocated, and others facing a crisis or life challenge. Stephen Ministry helps pastors and congregations provide quality caring ministry for as long as people need it.

Sounds like a scam to me.

[pamiam]

I first heard of Stephen's Ministry when we attended Calvary Chapel Capistrano Beach, CA, and it sounded right on. I checked it out because it sounded so good but the commitment was more than I was willing to do. Seems I remember a two year commitment after a fairly comprehensive training program..... I already had a Masters in Marriage and Family Therapy and didn't want to go through the regimen they outlined. I learned of a church in the desert where we now live that has Stephen's Ministry, so assume the program is alive and well. Conceptually, their goals are worthy but it is quite a stretch to ask volunteers to put out that much money and time commitment, although many put out many hours and much money in their ministries.

Sounds like they should have prepared attendees better for what to expect at that meeting. There's something valuable about having people "buy in" to a project and bringing a greater level of commitment. However, it is hard enough to find people to do much of anything, so something that requires both money and lots of time is pretty shocking to most of us in the church. Funny, if they were offering tickets to Celine Dion concert for $50, we'd snatch them up. Context is everything.

[OneLight]

Personally, God gives me the words to say to those who are in pain and grieving, through His Spirit. All it costs me is love.

[pamiam]

i went with some other people from church to what i THOUGHT was a four hour workshop on grief counseling today. i don't think any of us realized that this $15 "workshop" was going to be quite what it turned out to be. i felt like we'd just sat through 3 hours of an infomercial followed by one hour of interaction that taught us absolutely ZILCH about grief counseling.

i do think that the premise of the ministry (not the workshop) is very good, and hope our church does put together a similar ministry, but i really hope they DON'T buy what this one was selling... basically they spent three of the four hours talking about the ministry which they profit off of. the church has to pay nearly $2000 to become a "stephens ministry" affiliate (or whatever they call it), plus it requires at least one person, preferably two or more, to fly to dallas (the closest location) for a week long training course, at a cost of over $1000 bucks per person (not including airfare), plus then THOSE individuals would have to come back and train individuals within the church, at a cost of $50 per person.

anyway, this is apparently a ministry that is set up in churches of all denominations, so i'm sure someone here has it in their church, and i wanted to get some feedback on how well it is working.

I think I should add that it also sounds like they deserve from feedback from you. You obviously expected training in grief counseling and they should have delivered what they had promised.

[Smalcald]

I have heard of it but frankly don't know much about it.

The whole cost issue is a problem for me personally. It

[Guest LadyC]

pam, what's the stats? 20% of the congregation does 80% of the work? our congregation is pretty small as it is, and the 20% are already stretched pretty thin. i really think that those at our church who would be willing to do this would benefit from taking a local, low-cost grief counseling course. it's secular in nature, but we could use what we learn from that and incorporate it into a church ministry without having to go set in some seminar at a posh luxury hotel in dallas for several thousand dollars.

i remember during one of the 15 minute breaks, "money changers in the temple" blasted through my mind. i was more than just a little disappointed. if i'd had my own car there, i would have driven back to my side of town without even going back inside for my "workbook".

[Guest LadyC]

onelight, YES! exactly! although the purpose of the stephen ministry (or something similar) would be more of a long-term thing... essentially the "stephen leaders" assign each "stephen minister" to basically mentor an individual through the entire grief process for whatever they're going through... basically they commit to being the person's confidante and encourager for approximately a year, sometimes more, sometimes less. so it's actually a little more involved than letting the Holy Spirit lead you in what to say to a person when you just happen to run into them at church or elsewhere.