Internet Dating sites for Christians.....

[Xan]

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Just as a side note, and please understand that I'm not judging anyone here, but I have to ask.

Why would a christian, who is so concerned about morals, go to a secular dating service in search of a mate? A service that caters to all religions and sexual preferences? A service like Match.com?

There are plenty of Christians on that site who are looking to date other Christians. Actually, it's one of the profile questions, so it's easy to know what one's stated beliefs are right away.

[Guest man]

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Just as a side note, and please understand that I'm not judging anyone here, but I have to ask.

Why would a christian, who is so concerned about morals, go to a secular dating service in search of a mate? A service that caters to all religions and sexual preferences? A service like Match.com?

There are plenty of Christians on that site who are looking to date other Christians. Actually, it's one of the profile questions, so it's easy to know what one's stated beliefs are right away.

So it's impossible to lie on the profile?

Anyway, that's not the point. The point is that it is a secular dating service that caters to all beliefs and gay preferences.

Shouldn't a person who hold their morals at such a high standard avoid such a service?

Again, I'm not placing judgement on anyone. (So please don't go there.)

I just think that it is something to be considered.

[Xan]

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Just as a side note, and please understand that I'm not judging anyone here, but I have to ask.

Why would a christian, who is so concerned about morals, go to a secular dating service in search of a mate? A service that caters to all religions and sexual preferences? A service like Match.com?

There are plenty of Christians on that site who are looking to date other Christians. Actually, it's one of the profile questions, so it's easy to know what one's stated beliefs are right away.

So it's impossible to lie on the profile?

Anyway, that's not the point. The point is that it is a secular dating service that caters to all beliefs and gay preferences.

Shouldn't a person who hold their morals at such a high standard avoid such a service?

Again, I'm not placing judgement on anyone. (So please don't go there.)

I just think that it is something to be considered.

Outside of the sarcasm, I completely disagree with you. Finding someone to date through a service is no different, morally speaking, than through any other means. I went out with a man I met at work. I met a pharmacist when I was having my prescription filled, etc. Just like with a dating site, I didn't know their beliefs and personalities until I spent time with them. On a site, most lie about things most lie about in person. But just like it is with meeting someone on the streets, it takes time and watching and listening carefully to see if someone is who he/she says. At least with a profile, the ones who are legitimately looking for a match, will be honest about who they are and what they want, which makes things easier than starting from complete scratch if he happens to be your pharmacist with a really cute accent.

[Guest HIS girl]

Anyway, that's not the point. The point is that it is a secular dating service that caters to all beliefs and gay preferences.

Shouldn't a person who hold their morals at such a high standard avoid such a service?

Again, I'm not placing judgement on anyone. (So please don't go there.)

I just think that it is something to be considered.

As I said before, I used a Christian Dating site AND the whole point I was there was because as a single Christian mother of 4 boys ranging from 15 to 9, there are no available Christian men who are either single with kids or not who are my age that I come across. At my Church there are NO single men.

Sometimes you have to go where there is availablitity. But unlike Xan who met her man, I had a negative experience on the internet dating thing. I no longer use it.

[Guest man]

At my Church there are NO single men.

Sometimes you have to go where there is availablitity.

You'd be amazed at how many believers don't attend church.

Don't give up.

If you're truly looking for that special someone, you'll find him.

Sooner then you think.

[Guest HIS girl]

At my Church there are NO single men.

Sometimes you have to go where there is availablitity.

You'd be amazed at how many believers don't attend church.

Don't give up.

If you're truly looking for that special someone, you'll find him.

Sooner then you think.

I know A LOT of Believers are disillusioned with the "modern" Church...

I don't go clubbing, I'm always with my kids, I go to work, I go to Church....I don't have time to do anything else ...it doesn't leave much scope for "another"...if I do meet someone..I'm second guessing it will be when the boys have left home..BUT we all know one shouldn't second guess..God....!!

[LadyRaven]

So when you date, do you both sit down and compare a list of do's and don't's and if they don't match up, you move on to the next person?

Sounds kind of cold and impersonal. Like going to the supermarket and looking for the best porkchops.

Considering the alternative, first of all, I'd prefer that. I'd rather be ignored because I was not on a list than treated like a consumable like the modern dating culture. Not for me. I'm a daughter of the King, not a disposable bag of fast food.

Well, how one person does it and how another does it might be different. I have a theology I must follow, but outside of this, I dont make rules - Other than no physical intimacy that you would not expect from a brother or sister before marriage. My theology tends to filter many people away, and I guess those who see it my way dont worry so much about it.

The last few times I attempted this were not impersonal. I tend to believe that it is best to pick a spouse from amongst your friends. Which leaves me open to accumulating friends, but not attachments. If it turns out that we are only friends because he was interested and now he isn't, he eventually distance himself. If it turns out that he is now friends because he was interested and now he's just wanting to be friends, that's fine. I've never felt that one could have too many friends, even a recluse like me needs friends. And perhaps one of these days I'll find a friend who also turns out to be a good match.

That is what friends do, that is what brothers and sisters do (without any romantic or sexual tension and feelings).

Isn't that what dating is?

No, dating includes infatuation and such. Friendship is just that, friendship. Friends dont hold hands. Friends dont kiss other than the way brothers and sisters do. Friends are brothers and sisters that you aren't related to.

Just as a side note, and please understand that I'm not judging anyone here, but I have to ask.

Why would a christian, who is so concerned about morals, go to a secular dating service in search of a mate? A service that caters to all religions and sexual preferences? A service like Match.com?

There are Christian dating sites available if this bothers anyone. With me it's just a venue, like a bowling alley would be a venue.

[Xan]

For the believer, there is no such thing as recreational dating at all, because it is outside of the covenant, therefore you don't do it.Thus the only reason for dating is to find a wife or husband, not to just 'hang out'.

So when you date, do you both sit down and compare a list of do's and don't's and if they don't match up, you move on to the next person?

It's not exactly that detailed, but as far as the concept, what's wrong with that? It's similar to how good parents used to match up their children and still do in many cultures. Tell me how the modern way of dating is better with regards to the outcomes. My fiance' has a modern view to dating, whereas, I have a slightly more old-fashioned outlook, but when he met my list of 18 criteria (yes, I actually wrote out a cold, impersonal list of very specific things I wanted in a mate), even before love or romantic feelings were involved on my end (he was not in love at this stage, but he certainly had romantic feelings towards me) I knew I wanted to marry him because of how well he fit the criteria. That might sound cold and impersonal, but since then we have fallen in love, and the both of us feel more connected to each other than we ever had in previous relationships. Why do we have a strong connection? Because the courtship was handled well, and everything has been done in order. When one puts their heart before their head, things usually turn out pretty messy.

BTW, I adopted that view of courtship as a result of a failed marraige and a failed relationship my first shot out of the box.

[Guest man]

dating includes infatuation and such. Friendship is just that, friendship. Friends dont hold hands. Friends dont kiss other than the way brothers and sisters do.

It's not ok to date a non-believer but it's ok to give in to the lusts of the flesh as long as the other person is a christian?

Interesting.

There are Christian dating sites available if this bothers anyone. With me it's just a venue, like a bowling alley would be a venue.

If one is interested in "christian only", why would one go to a "non-believer" site seeking a mate?

[Xan]

dating includes infatuation and such. Friendship is just that, friendship. Friends dont hold hands. Friends dont kiss other than the way brothers and sisters do.

It's not ok to date a non-believer but it's ok to give in to the lusts of the flesh as long as the other person is a christian?

Interesting.

Where are you getting that? She's advocating NOT kissing.