Immodesty Is A Growing Problem....

[Nicks Girl]

I agree with catsmeow.

Before I accepted Christ, I never once thought of dressing in a provocative way, and neither did the people I hung out with. The LOST don't know any better. Why should they? Why should we expect Christian behavior out of the non Christians? we can't. They are only living for themselves, and for the emotions of the moment.

one of the songs that kept playing in my head after I became a Christian was the song "Fill my cup, Lord"

"Like the woman at the well, I was seeking, for things that could not satisfy, but then, I heard my Savior speaking. Draw from my well, that never shall run dry."

It was an amazing feeling. It was such a change, and before that, I was in darkness, I didn't know better, even though I had grown up in a Christian home around CHRISTIANs all the time. I didn't care what THEY thought.

I was doing what made ME happy.

[tsth]

And what does the love for your child look like? Do you speak the Truth in love to them? How do you care for a child? A new one? How do you help them?

1 Thess. 2:1 For you yourselves know, brethren, that our coming to you was not in vain. 2 But even F2 after we had suffered before and were spitefully treated at Philippi, as you know, we were bold in our God to speak to you the gospel of God in much conflict. 3 For our exhortation did not come from error or uncleanness, nor was it in deceit. 4 But as we have been approved by God to be entrusted with the gospel, even so we speak, not as pleasing men, but God who tests our hearts. 5 For neither at any time did we use flattering words, as you know, nor a cloak for covetousness--God is witness. 6 Nor did we seek glory from men, either from you or from others, when we might have made demands as apostles of Christ.

7 But we were gentle among you, just as a nursing mother cherishes her own children. 8 So, affectionately longing for you, we were well pleased to impart to you not only the gospel of God, but also our own lives, because you had become dear to us. 9 For you remember, brethren, our labor and toil; for laboring night and day, that we might not be a burden to any of you, we preached to you the gospel of God. 10 You are witnesses, and God also, how devoutly and justly and blamelessly we behaved ourselves among you who believe; 11 as you know how we exhorted, and comforted, and charged every one of you, as a father does his own children, 12 that you would walk worthy of God who calls you into His own kingdom and glory.

Dear Sister,

No one is proclaiming we do this without mercy. We do this in love and concern for one another, just as we would love our own children and teach them in Truth and Love. God's love.

:hug:

In His Love,

Suzanne

[Catsmeow]

A baby must first be born. After they're born, then we nurture.

I'm just at the birthing room...trying to introduce these precious babes to Jesus.

Last Halloween, (sorry to change the topic briefly) I had a little gobblin hug my neck when I gave him a kid's tract and told him how much God loves him.

He said, "Thanks. I needed to hear that."

He was about 8 years old.

Okay, so was that wrong? Reaching out to a little child who never heard anyone say, "God loves you!" It's a start...a first step.

Suzanne, we're on the same page and beleive the same things...except I do understand that an infant needs milk before they're weaned from the breast onto the toddler food.

One step at a time....and patience. We always want to force feed them so fast ...not realizing that God's Holy Spirit will guide us to move at the appropriate pace for each individual.

Some grow quickly; some lag behind.

Love is being honest but I've noticed there's a sweet and gentle way to help people on the wrong path. A way that might have more effect on them than if we make rude faces at them.

Kindness is an amazing thing. Jesus showed me great kindness when I was a mess. I want to imitate His example.

[jamie]

We cant paint them all with the same broad brush...some dress that way out of ignorance in not being trained at home, some out of rebellion, some out of a desire for attention, some want to be "stylish", some like the power it gives them, etc. They all do it for a host of different reasons.

We cant paint them with the same broad brush and think a certain application is the answer.

But of course we do know that God and His standard is the ultimate answer.

[emeraldgirl]

Cats Meow,

I agree with you. (And thank you for humbly sharing your story.) I was not even "a prodigal", as you said, I viewed myself as a Christian and was raised in a Christian home. Yet I dressed like a harlot and swore like a sailor! I knew that I dressed "sexy", but I had no notion whatsoever that it was inappropriate. I even cringe when I think about what I wore to work and I worked AT A LAW FIRM!

I know, I once was lost too! And also dressed immodestly. But what compels me the most, is that no one cared enough about me to tell me the Truth..........not even my parents knew that it was OK to say "NO!" to something I might choose to wear, and then explain the specifics of "Why"? Moms, Dads, it's ok to explain specifics about lust and desire to your daughters and sons, and when you tell them that what they are doing/wearing has a bearing on others thoughts, they are self-conscious, as they should be.

I do agree with this, too, though. My parent are devout Christians and I find it sort of odd that my parents drilled certain things into my head; they won't even have a glass of champagne on New Year's Eve, say, but my mother pretty much ignored my sexy dress.

I have a SIL who has a 14 and a 12 year old daughter and it has saddened me to see that she seems to be relaxing her standards about what she will allow them to wear. We used to be on the same page, but it seems now that she is afraid (?) to draw the line in the sand with her daughters, or maybe she herself doesn't want to be the unpopular mother who says no. It makes me wonder if I will keep my beliefs intact when my own daughter is a teen (she is 7 now).

The clothing that is marketed to girls my daughter's age astonishes me! I have had to tell her she couldn't have a particular ONE PIECE bathing suit because the legs where cut like French Cut style.

And since we're dwelling on girls and women here, let me just point out that some of the boy's tee-shirts that I see marketed for my son's age have graphics that look EVIL. Even this, to me, is not what I want to teach my son is good and right.

3-in-1, you are right that matters of what is okay and what is not are subjective to a point. (As many Christian Issues are.) But, it is worthwhile to pray and seek God's direction on the subject. I am not convicted of, say, showing my arms or the usual part of my legs, where some feel that that, too, is immodest. But, all I know is that after I turned towards God, I could no longer the same things I wore before, I couldn't speak the way I did before, I couldn't even enjoy some of the same TV shows that I did before. I wouldn't be in a hurry to tell someone else they are "sinning" for doing those things, but I appreciate that God hieghtened my own sensitivity to it.

[Annette443pink]

I feel that a woman should consider how her dress will affect the men who see her. Is it causing him to sin? There are men who will admit that just a pair of nice fitting jeans on a woman will start their minds thinking about things they shouldn't.

I believe a woman ought to be extremely careful about the way she dresses for that reason alone.

I also think daughters ought to be dressed modestly from the beginning so that they are used to it. It's dissapointing to see young ladies or any age for that matter with shorts on with words across the bottom deliberately drawing attention to that area. It may seem cute on little girls but what are you teaching them?

I would never dream of treating someone badly because of the way they are dressed. If they were a part of my church they would hear about modesty on occasion from the pulpit or Sunday school class etc. If I built a relationship with the person & felt it was right to discuss the subject I would.

We did have someone visit our church here & there who kept wearing revealing clothing. I remember her wearing a very short skirt that you could see her underwear through. I believe it was quietly mentioned to a relative of hers. When it became apparent that this relative could not get through to her, she was approached by the Pastor or someone and told it was not appropriate. I don't think it should be ignored when it's that bad.

[Catsmeow]

...some dress that way out of ignorance in not being trained at home, some out of rebellion, some out of a desire for attention, some want to be "stylish", some like the power it gives them, etc. They all do it for a host of different reasons.

I did it for ALL these reasons but mainly, I wanted to fill a void in me that I thought only a MAN could fill.

Little did I know about the "man" Jesus Christ.

I can only speak from my own experiences. I was filled with demons. Whether anyone believes me or not, doesn't matter. I was saturated with them. They had a stranglehold over my life.

You can preach "decency" till the cows come home folks...but it's the love of Christ and the working of the Holy Spirit inside that changes a person's whole outlook and makes them think "new".

Jesus...YOU GET ALL THE HONOR AND GLORY FOR MY TRANSFORMATION!

Thank You, Jesus for saving me....I love you! :il:

[jamie]

...some dress that way out of ignorance in not being trained at home, some out of rebellion, some out of a desire for attention, some want to be "stylish", some like the power it gives them, etc. They all do it for a host of different reasons.

I did it for ALL these reasons but mainly, I wanted to fill a void in me that I thought only a MAN could fill.

Little did I know about the "man" Jesus Christ.

I can only speak from my own experiences. I was filled with demons. Whether anyone believes me or not, doesn't matter. I was saturated with them. They had a stranglehold over my life.

You can preach "decency" till the cows come home folks...but it's the love of Christ and the working of the Holy Spirit inside that changes a person's whole outlook and makes them think "new".

Jesus...YOU GET ALL THE HONOR AND GLORY FOR MY TRANSFORMATION!

Thank You, Jesus for saving me....I love you! :il:

I dont doubt what you've said for a minute, but we all really are coming from different experiences and we approach different situations according to where we've been. Me for instance, i was probably what would be considered a spoiled little daddy's girl who rebelled because i never really had clear boundries as a young child.

When i got to be a teenager you could forget it then! I grew up secure in my parents love but they werent very consistent when it came to discipline and making us take responsibilities.

As a result i was a pretty wild teenager and young adult, I left no wild oats unsowed and had a series of broken relationships. My marriage was falling apart when Jesus revealed himself to me. It was a humbling and liberating experience and nothing could ever satisfy the way he can. My point is, it took God to do it. I didnt need someone to love me in human terms, i had that all my life. I needed a dose of truth and i got it after i started attending church for the first time since i was 12.

Thats why i said we cant paint everyone with the same brush and say all they need is "love"...you could have loved me all you wanted and i would have still went out and did my thing. It takes a supernatural encounter with God, just as you had, and just as i had. There are those who do need another human to love them and show them Jesus.

And there are those like me who need some in your face preaching and teaching that will hold them acountable and convict the heart deeply. We all tend to see others in the way we've seen ourselves.

[emeraldgirl]

It's dissapointing to see young ladies or any age for that matter with shorts on with words across the bottom deliberately drawing attention to that area. It may seem cute on little girls but what are you teaching them?

Annette, I thought I was the only mother who doesn't think that is "cute", but inappropriate! I get hand-me-downs sometimes and I have looked at the little soccer shorts with "Soccer" on the rear and thought, "I know this is the style...but this just offends me! I don't want people reading my daughter's butt!"

I did it for ALL these reasons but mainly, I wanted to fill a void in me that I thought only a MAN could fill.

That's exactly what I did, too, Cat's Meow. I thought it was good to "turn heads" and have men look at me. I remember when I was 16 and I turned a guy off I had intended to attract; he said with disappointment, "You're so...obvious."

I do agree that the bottom line is that only the Holy Spirit can make those changes. One time, someone at church did have a "word" with me (I was 15) about the length of my skirt at a roller skating party for the teens. I and my date (Date? At 15? Part of the trouble, right?!) left in disgust. They were speaking the truth and they were very delicate about it, but God had not done his work yet, so I just heard it as, "We don't like your clothes." I think if others are going to approach this subject with someone, they have to have prayed about it extensively and without a HINT of pride anywhere within them, i.e, "I dress correctly; you don't." I would be in favor, though, of pastors speaking on the subject from the pulpit.

[Catsmeow]

When I speak of love, I am speaking of the Love of God and the indwelling of the Holy Spirit.

I don't look down my nose anymore. I used to. All the time. Something's just changed in me lately.

I don't condone the sin at ALL~ I hate it! I despise it! It's makes me ill!

But there's this "counter-balance" of immense pity for knowing that many people are so very lost and in such desperate need to know that real love comes from Jesus Christ .....

And they don't know that yet.

I think being a Christian is hard because we're caught between longing for what is good and holy............and........... grieving for those who are in darkness.

At least, that's where I'm at at this point.