Sharing tips and ideas on having a less stressful Christmas season

[cherylu]

Maybe this doesn't affect a lot of you. And I'll bet the ladies that are affected by pre-Christmas stress far outnumber the men.

I guess I wonder too if those of us that found ourselves saying we were "older then dirt" in a previous thread have more problems with this then you younger folks.

Personally, I grew up in a family and culture that said everything had to be "perfect" for Christmas. The house had to be cleaned--spotlessly--from top to bottom. It had to be decorated to the hilt. Much cooking, baking, and candy making went into getting ready for the Christmas season. And of course there was the present buying and wrapping.

When I was younger, I tried to keep up with the tradition because, after all, that is the way things were to be done! But as I have gotten older, I have let more and more of it go because trying to keep up with all of that produced a stress level that was way too much for this old body. And by the time Christmas Eve and Christmas Day arrived, I was SO tired.

So, have any of the rest of you experienced this? And if so, how have you dealt with it?

The season comes and goes without us stressing out about it. And remembering that what we are celebrating--the birth of our Savior-- doesn't require ANY of the "culturally required" stuff--is certainly the first step to being free of this type of stress.

So, tips, ideas, discussion, any one?

Edited December 13, 2011 by cherylu

[oldzimm]

Maybe this doesn't affect a lot of you. And I'll bet the ladies that are affected by pre-Christmas stress far outnumber the men.

I guess I wonder too if those of us that found ourselves saying we were "older then dirt" in a previous thread have more problems with this then you younger folks.

Personally, I grew up in a family and culture that said everything had to be "perfect" for Christmas. The house had to be cleaned--spotlessly--from top to bottom. It had to be decorated to the hilt. Much cooking, baking, and candy making went into getting ready for the Christmas season. And of course there was the present buying and wrapping.

When I was younger, I tried to keep up with the tradition because, after all, that is the way things were to be done! But as I have gotten older, I have let more and more of it go because trying to keep up with all of that produced a stress level that was way too much for this old body. And by the time Christmas Eve and Christmas Day arrived, I was SO tired.

So, have any of the rest of you experienced this? And if so, how have you dealt with it?

The season comes and goes without us stressing out about it. And remembering that what we are celebrating--the birth of our Savior-- doesn't require ANY of the "culturally required" stuff--is certainly the first step to being free of this type of stress.

So, tips, ideas, discussion, any one?

You just described my wife to a "T" in that paragraph, but I often wonder if my wife does it to hide pain. You see it was on Christmas Day (1979) that her sister and her sister's boyfriend were killed in a car crash, it seems that ever since then, she really goes overboard with Christmas. I tried to get her to talk about it and remove the chains of grief, I know it takes more of a man then me to do that for her and Jesus is the man. Any prayers for my wife is appreciated.

I do remember stress free Christmas's when I was a kid, then why wouldn't they be stress free, I was a kid. I remember the beautiful candlelight services on Christmas Eve. My parents owned a Dairy farm and a restaurant, so they were pretty busy and their finances were pretty much tied up in the business's, but on Christmas Day it was just the family spending time together, playing games (no video games back then), watching Christmas parades on T.V. and eating mom's home cooking, her homemade cookies were out of this world.

I always liked going out to the barn Christmas morning to feed the animals, it felt different then any other day of the year. Being that it was Christmas and there was very little traffic on the country road and with the snow on the ground, it seemed so peaceful. I think that is why I liked feeding the animals Christmas morning, it sorta gave me a connection to the manger scene, when Jesus was born.

Christmas I suppose can't ever be 100% stress free, but you can reduce the stress by just spending time with loved ones. if it is impossible to spend time with loved ones, give them a call. Christmas (2004), I was in Iraq and that phone call I made to my family Christmas Day was so special. (great, now I got tears in my eyes)

Some say Christmas isn't about gift giving, I say oh but it is. On Christmas, God gave us the best gift possible, that was a gift of Love and that Love gift came in a form of a baby named Jesus Christ.

MERRY CHRISTMAS

[Dragoon]

Maybe this doesn't affect a lot of you. And I'll bet the ladies that are affected by pre-Christmas stress far outnumber the men.

I guess I wonder too if those of us that found ourselves saying we were "older then dirt" in a previous thread have more problems with this then you younger folks.

Personally, I grew up in a family and culture that said everything had to be "perfect" for Christmas. The house had to be cleaned--spotlessly--from top to bottom. It had to be decorated to the hilt. Much cooking, baking, and candy making went into getting ready for the Christmas season. And of course there was the present buying and wrapping.

When I was younger, I tried to keep up with the tradition because, after all, that is the way things were to be done! But as I have gotten older, I have let more and more of it go because trying to keep up with all of that produced a stress level that was way too much for this old body. And by the time Christmas Eve and Christmas Day arrived, I was SO tired.

So, have any of the rest of you experienced this? And if so, how have you dealt with it?

The season comes and goes without us stressing out about it. And remembering that what we are celebrating--the birth of our Savior-- doesn't require ANY of the "culturally required" stuff--is certainly the first step to being free of this type of stress.

So, tips, ideas, discussion, any one?

A passage that comes to mind is Gal 1:10

Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ.

I can find no place in scripture where we are commanded to have a special celebration to remember the Lord's birth to please God. It's not a bad thing though, and I would hope we celebrate the Lord's birth every day. In everything we do though, our eyes should be on our Lord Jesus Christ.

I personally look on Christmas less as a celebration of Jesus' birth, and more as the one time in the year where non-believing friends and relatives are (more) willing to think seriously about Jesus and who He is.

[cherylu]

Oldzimm,

Thank you so much for your sharing.

I grew up on a farm too. Ialso remember those very quiet Christmas mornings. They were special.

I will pray that the Lord will meet your wife's needs. I think Christmas can be hard for a lot of people because of grief and painful memories associated with the season. My husband's Dad passed away in December seven years ago and my Mom just three days before Christmas three years ago. The celebrating has had a different feel to it after that.

[ayin jade]

My mom watched her mom half kill herself trying to put together family feasts. She said she would never do it. And she didnt. We went out on Christmas and Thanksgiving. Ive kept that "tradition" and it is much less stressful. Its also less calorie laden lol. Other ways we keep stress down is to have some small family events such as going to some local light display or watching a Christmas movie together. We take time for one another. We dont make gifts a high priority and try to get them throughout the year so its not a big rush at Christmas. I dont do holiday baking either, primarily because of trying to be sensible about weight. If I have to provide them, then its store bought. I do have a special food gift that I give out to folks and it isnt one I have to make. There are many ways of doing something special that way. My in laws gave out small bags of peanuts with Christmas candy mixed in. It looks pretty, tastes good, and doesnt involve hours of preparation. As for the competition to be perfect in decorating etc, I gave that up long ago. Its amazing how much of a difference that can make when you surrender that notion.

[cherylu]

I'm really appreciating hearing ways others have found to de-stress Christmas. And I enjoy hearing about your family traditions as well.

You have made some really good points.

"Surrendering" family or cultural traditions isn't always easy to do. At least it hasn't been for me. But I think I would of more then half killed myself by now if I had tried to keep up with all of it the way I remember it from the past! They can come very deeply ingrained that "this is the way it has always been done and this is the way it MUSTalways be done."

I really hope some more of you will feel free to share.

[Guest]

Thanksgiving and Christmas were limited to our immediate family for the most part. The main reason was due to our family being scattered over at least 2 or more continents most of the time, which made holiday get gatherings difficult, expensive, or impossible . There was normally a holiday meal -- in which everyone was drafted for kitchen duty for both preparation and the aftermath. Money was usually sent instead of presents because it was cheaper (and as an adult, it makes more sense.) Holiday travel was limited to road trips for the most part, as my parents learned to avoid the nasty combination of holiday travel and airports. (They would be aghast at what air travelers put up with today!)

Today as an adult I ignore Black Friday and all the rest of the shopping hype. I don't decorate because I'm single and frankly don't feel like bothering partly due to lack of money -- and because I have no where to store the stuff for the rest of the year. "Decorating" this year is basically the Christmas tree wallpaper on my computer desktop . . .

Please don't feel sorry for me. I've chosen to remember Christ because He's really all that matters. I'd rather go serve meals at the homeless shelter than sit around watching American football any way. Besides -- I found out I'm working that day anyway -- which means holiday pay.

[Peri]

One of the things that I do is shop throughout the year. If my shopping isn't done by the beginning of November, then I hurry it up before Thanksgiving. Shopping online some helps quite a bit with this. Since I don't do Black Friday shopping, I try to get all of my Christmas cards done then. I usually buy them online in October and make sure to stock up on stamps, too. I try to keep up with cleaning year-round, so there isn't really anything extra to do there. Decorating is usually done the first weekend in December and only takes about 2-3 hours. I do baking at the last minute so that stuff is fresh. I do all of my wrapping the morning of Christmas Eve, but it's not anything fancy, so it doesn't take me any longer than a couple of hours. In short, I guess that I just try to space stuff out.

[cherylu]

One of the things that I do is shop throughout the year. If my shopping isn't done by the beginning of November, then I hurry it up before Thanksgiving. Shopping online some helps quite a bit with this. Since I don't do Black Friday shopping, I try to get all of my Christmas cards done then. I usually buy them online in October and make sure to stock up on stamps, too. I try to keep up with cleaning year-round, so there isn't really anything extra to do there. Decorating is usually done the first weekend in December and only takes about 2-3 hours. I do baking at the last minute so that stuff is fresh. I do all of my wrapping the morning of Christmas Eve, but it's not anything fancy, so it doesn't take me any longer than a couple of hours. In short, I guess that I just try to space stuff out.

Hi Peri,

Spacing stuff out really is a help isn't it?

One of the things that I do too and and have found to be a big help is buying gifts early. Actually, the after Christmas sales and the seasonal (spring and fall) clearance sales can be a very good time to pick up things to use for gifts for the next year. My biggest problem with doing this has been forgetting what I have already bought and finding myself with extra presents for someone come Christmas time! Oh well, often they just become a head start on the next year's gift buying!

[Peri]

One of the things that I do is shop throughout the year. If my shopping isn't done by the beginning of November, then I hurry it up before Thanksgiving. Shopping online some helps quite a bit with this. Since I don't do Black Friday shopping, I try to get all of my Christmas cards done then. I usually buy them online in October and make sure to stock up on stamps, too. I try to keep up with cleaning year-round, so there isn't really anything extra to do there. Decorating is usually done the first weekend in December and only takes about 2-3 hours. I do baking at the last minute so that stuff is fresh. I do all of my wrapping the morning of Christmas Eve, but it's not anything fancy, so it doesn't take me any longer than a couple of hours. In short, I guess that I just try to space stuff out.

Hi Peri,

Spacing stuff out really is a help isn't it?

One of the things that I do too and and have found to be a big help is buying gifts early. Actually, the after Christmas sales and the seasonal (spring and fall) clearance sales can be a very good time to pick up things to use for gifts for the next year. My biggest problem with doing this has been forgetting what I have already bought and finding myself with extra presents for someone come Christmas time! Oh well, often they just become a head start on the next year's gift buying!

Yes, the after Christmas sales and various other sales are great times to shop. I've done the same thing: buying extra presents. I just use them for next year, too, or, if it's a generic enough gift, use it for a gift basket for a new mom in the church or ladies night out giveaway, etc.