hi all wandering if I can get an insight or interprataion (pardon the

[fudgers]

Start at the begining so you can see the whole picture

When I was 19 I started a relationship with a christian girl, we did have pre marital sex

Her parents thought she was still a virgin and she would attend the church as she always

Did I started to go with her as a way of gaining acceptance from her friends and family I was brought up

In an agnostic enviroment so didn't see much harm in it, we got progressively more serious but

Her parents started to tell her and me that what I do and the choice in hobbies and music was

Wrong, I like music by iron maiden and acdc and some other heavy rock bands I also read a lot of fantasy

Stories and play rpg's like dnd. But I was in love so I thought and tried to change till someone preaching about forgiveness at the church really hit me it was the passion in his voice the conviction that he spoke with that really made me choose to accept jesus, to the point that I stopped fornicating as I was told it was called and took up a new christians course, after about a month me and my girlfriend had sex again as she said that as we have already done it that we were spiritually married in the eyes of god and I spose that I thought the same and we started again we. Even moved in with each other and continued going to church, there was a division in the church as the pastor and his wife had been previously had been married and there was other issues like there was no warmth or fellowship in the church every one was focused on keeping the pastor happy so I left me and the girlfriend split as she cheated and I fell into a couple of months where I was really horrible to a girl

Cheated on her and just used her but I got ill and she was there when no one else was we were together nearly two years then she cheated on me

I then got with a girl and we saw each other for a month then she left me as I was after one thing and she wanted someone her family could be proud of her (good for her we are still friends though)

I spent six months feeling sorry for myself before I met claire (she is agnostic but is very spiritual she can sense spirits) and she has brought so much happyness into my life we were together 14 months when she fell pregnant now I'm a dad and I want. The best for him but recently I feel like I have a warm feeling guiding me in cetain ways I took zachary (my son) to a dad and baby group at a church hall and after that the feeling has been heightend to the point that I have even downloaded a bible with a reading plan for my blackberry I feel as though jesus wants me to let him back in but I guess I am afraid of the whole church thing again and being judged for what I am pleas any advice would be appreciated thank you

[Jayyycuuup]

----1 Corinthians 3:16---- "Know ye not that ye are the temple of God, and that the Spirit of God dwelleth in you?" You do not have to go to church.....just like 1Corinthians 3:16 explains God does not dwell in a church but resides inside you. Many people are led to believe that you must go to church because of what Hebrews 10- verse 19-25:

You don't have to attend church in order to be saved. However, people attend church in order to keep their fellowship with God. Once you stop devoting the time, you lose the devotion. Church is a great thing for someone who is busy, or just likes to gather with family and friends but it is not manditory. If going to church and being rediculed worrys you, then devote the time that you would go to church to constructing a bible study. Mathew 18:20-- "For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them" Even if you feel uncomfortable around a group, get together with a friend or something and set up a time to worship God.....

I thought that this verse was relevant because of the things that you said you had went through....

-----Matthew 10:17------ when he say's, "But beware of men: for they will deliver you up to the councils, and they will scourge (whip) you in their synagogues. ....If you feel threatened or just frightened of going to church then simply dont go. God won't condem you because you don't go to church. He just understands that mankind is just very self centered (not saying you are) thus established churches to praise his name. There is always an equal alternative, its just a matter of making it happen.

I hope this helps! ~God bless~

[Guest]

Praying~!

[OldShep]

Praying~!

Praying for You {fudgers}....along with FresnoJoe.

I might add that God Loves you, you are His son, and God understands our weaknesses and does not want any bad things to happen to you and Yes Jesus is knocking at your door, Let Him in. Let Jesus into your heart, for you and for your son.

The Church is not a museum for saints, it is a Hospital for the sinners of the world enter and be healed, by the blood of Jesus, who died, for you fudgers.

[fudgers]

Thank you for the help, the thing is I do want to go to church as I want to have the network of friends for my son so that he can have ppl to turn to that share his faith, spose by your advice and prayers you have answeres my next question which is do you think I may have been to church during a conflict of interest and ppl were just showing there colors and that deep down not all christians no matter what denomination are that ignorant or closed off to others

[OldShep]

IC

Thank you for the help, the thing is I do want to go to church as I want to have the network of friends for my son so that he can have ppl to turn to that share his faith, spose by your advice and prayers you have answeres my next question which is do you think I may have been to church during a conflict of interest and ppl were just showing there colors and that deep down not all christians no matter what denomination are that ignorant or closed off to others

People are human and all Christians are human and all people act differently to things happening around them. Something said or written can be seen one way to one and another way to another person. No person is perfect and there are no perfect Christians in the church, bar , Jesus Christ. Yes, some Christians can assume they are better then others and boast to how perfect they think they are, but that to is a sin of pride in self. One attends church to draw closer to God, not, to show off their new hats, or dresses to the Lord. I go to church to Praise the Living God, that reach down and pulled me out of the hole I had dug myself into and He saved me. Has He did for everyone else that turns to Him and Believes in Him, Jesus Christ.

At times Christians can be worse than a thousand engineers working on a project, each one thinking they alone have the best design the best plans and the only true gift to get it done right. Forgetting that they are part of the whole body and each part has a job to do, according to the gifts they have to finish that project. God is the head engineer of the universe and His design is Flawless, however, there may be a few in the church that think they could do it better....lessons are at times hard to learn..

ICL~~~Dennis

[Leonard]

Brother, get your eyes of YOU, and get them on the Lord.

Man (including yourself) will eventually disappoint, but God will always be there.

[Rare Bird]

Good news! God is clearly not done with you Fudgers.

Phil 1:6 For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.

My walk too, has had it share of confusion, disenfranchisement, renewal, "touching hot stoves", and "falling down". God's timeline is not like ours where we think in terms of minutes, days, years...He's got all the time in the world (because He is the Creator of time), so as long as you have that spirit of repentance, He will always--ALWAYS--forgive. That's what unconditional (agape) love is. And God, our Abba Father IS love.

As I read in a book that helped to get back to repentance said, "It's easier to hug a dirty kid, than a stiff one." (Approaching God by Steven Brown)

I mean seriously...Look at Israel (Jeremiah Ch.3). Look at King David (2 Sam Ch. 11 & 12). Look at the Apostle Paul (Acts Ch. 26) who called himself "Chief among sinners" (1 Tim 1:15)....I could go on and on. They all sinned BIG time. Yet because of their willingness to repent (to be sorry for and stop continuing to do), God used them to His glory. Hallelujah, that's what it's all about. God's whole purpose since DAY1 is calling us to come to him through repentance and being baptized into Christ, so that we can be restored to Him!

And He is relentless in His pursuit. All we have to do is ask him--with a broken spirit and contrite heart--to forgive. And He stays true to His word because He cannot lie. (See Psalm 103, below, and write it on your heart.)

You have a soft heart, and that is what pleases God more than anything. It's what He looks so that He can work in us and through us.

Read Psalm 51--David's prayer of repentance after sinning with Bathsheba, killing Uzziah and trying to cover it up...and then just tell God in your own words how you feel. He already knows but loves to hear it from us anyway, just as our beloved on earth loves to hear it from us.

Psa 51:1 To the choirmaster. A Psalm of David, when Nathan the prophet went to him, after he had gone in to Bathsheba. Have mercy on me, O God, according to your steadfast love; according to your abundant mercy blot out my transgressions.

Psa 51:2 Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin!

Psa 51:3 For I know my transgressions, and my sin is ever before me.

Psa 51:4 Against you, you only, have I sinned and done what is evil in your sight, so that you may be justified in your words and blameless in your judgment.

Psa 51:5 Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity, and in sin did my mother conceive me.

Psa 51:6 Behold, you delight in truth in the inward being, and you teach me wisdom in the secret heart.

Psa 51:7 Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean; wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow.

Psa 51:8 Let me hear joy and gladness; let the bones that you have broken rejoice.

Psa 51:9 Hide your face from my sins, and blot out all my iniquities.

Psa 51:10 Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me.

Psa 51:11 Cast me not away from your presence, and take not your Holy Spirit from me.

Psa 51:12 Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and uphold me with a willing spirit.

Psa 51:13 Then I will teach transgressors your ways, and sinners will return to you.

Psa 51:14 Deliver me from blood-guiltiness, O God, O God of my salvation, and my tongue will sing aloud of your righteousness.

Psa 51:15 O Lord, open my lips, and my mouth will declare your praise.

Psa 51:16 For you will not delight in sacrifice, or I would give it; you will not be pleased with a burnt offering.

Psa 51:17 The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.

Psa 51:18 Do good to Zion in your good pleasure; build up the walls of Jerusalem;

Psa 51:19 then will you delight in right sacrifices, in burnt offerings and whole burnt offerings; then bulls will be offered on your altar.

Psa 103:1 Of David. Bless the LORD, O my soul, and all that is within me, bless his holy name!

Psa 103:2 Bless the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits,

Psa 103:3 who forgives all your iniquity, who heals all your diseases,

Psa 103:4 who redeems your life from the pit, who crowns you with steadfast love and mercy,

Psa 103:5 who satisfies you with good so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's.

Psa 103:6 The LORD works righteousness and justice for all who are oppressed.

Psa 103:7 He made known his ways to Moses, his acts to the people of Israel.

Psa 103:8 The LORD is merciful and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love.

Psa 103:9 He will not always chide, nor will he keep his anger forever.

Psa 103:10 He does not deal with us according to our sins, nor repay us according to our iniquities.

Psa 103:11 For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him;

Psa 103:12 as far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us.

Psa 103:13 As a father shows compassion to his children, so the LORD shows compassion to those who fear him.

Psa 103:14 For he knows our frame; he remembers that we are dust.

Psa 103:15 As for man, his days are like grass; he flourishes like a flower of the field;

Psa 103:16 for the wind passes over it, and it is gone, and its place knows it no more.

Psa 103:17 But the steadfast love of the LORD is from everlasting to everlasting on those who fear him, and his righteousness to children's children,

Psa 103:18 to those who keep his covenant and remember to do his commandments.

Psa 103:19 The LORD has established his throne in the heavens, and his kingdom rules over all.

Psa 103:20 Bless the LORD, O you his angels, you mighty ones who do his word, obeying the voice of his word!

Psa 103:21 Bless the LORD, all his hosts, his ministers, who do his will!

Psa 103:22 Bless the LORD, all his works, in all places of his dominion. Bless the LORD, O my soul!

Now. To avoid falling and touching more hot stoves, you need to stay washed in His word. I know you are disenfranchised with church right now (I was for more than 20 years), but I pray you find a Bible Study--locally or online--to keep truth in front of you, and give you the opportunity to fall in love with the God who desires a relationship with you!) You need to know what God's Word says, not what people say about God's Word. This is causes confusion and leads us away. I speak from experience.

Hangeth thou in there, baby! Your in good hands.

[nChrist]

You will be in my prayers.

[fudgers]

Just an update old shep your word gave me hope and during a bible course I am parktaking now independantly via an app for my black berry job 38 was yesterdays reading and it was just after read your comment made me see sense and I will be attending church to try to build a fellowship with some new ppl and god