Never Thought I'd Have an Affair

[wordsower]

you missed my last post: end of page 6

[Orr v'emet]

Wordsower, I am sorry this happened to you but as I stated before, whether or not this has happened to me isn't important. No one should ever let their personal experiences change what the word of God says.

And hey, Gerioke...you think it's okay for someone to stay in a relationship where they are physically and emotionally and maybe even sexually abused?

[Gerioke]

And hey, Gerioke...you think it's okay for someone to stay in a relationship where they are physically and emotionally and maybe even sexually abused?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Huh?

uh... no?

[Guest Bro David™]

Well, if the husband can live with his wife sleeping around on him for 8 months, let's see, that is 32 weeks, 224 days, I think.........anyways, it's 70 x 7 and forgiveness is not the issue.  As christians we have to forgive, but we don't have to continue to live with someone who is selfish and has more concern for a good time than their commitment to their spouse and God.

As I was saying, if he can live with it, more power to him. 

Wondering how many of you have actually been in this position?

9 years after the fact, I can tell you I don't think my husband has cheated on me anymore, but I do not love him the way I did, and I don't trust him, I probably never will.  Yeah, I forgive him, because I have to, and we exist, for the most part, like anyone else, it's just never going to be the same, ever.  God intended for 2 people to exclusively share such personal, private actions and when a 3rd party wrecks that it can never be completely whole again.

I think it was selfish of my husband to beg me to stay.  I'd have been better off on my way.  I have put myself in the other place and I know if I had an affair I couldn't just have the audacity to ask my spouse to stay with me, that takes a lack of self respect and respect for your partner, in my opinion. 

Sorry if it's too close to home for me to be more objectionable than that.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Wordsower,

You don't have to be sorry, sister.

It takes alot to stay, it really does.

Well, Jesus is comming soon sister keep the faith.

With Love

David King

[Orr v'emet]

And hey, Gerioke...you think it's okay for someone to stay in a relationship where they are physically and emotionally and maybe even sexually abused?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Huh?

uh... no?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Oops...my apologies. I was asking the wrong person.

[RustyAngeL]

Tell no one more of this,,,,

End this affair......speak no more to anyone about it as long as you live...

NEVER confess this to your husband...

Never confess this to anyone you work with or with anyone in your family....

Burry this down deep in your soul and NEVER let it out again!!!!!!!

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

I would agree about not telling anyone about it, but bury it don't in your soul ...No...as I said get alone with God. He knows your heart and he can heal you of this..there is healing just trust God.

[wordsower]

Well, ok, then, the bible says "Thou shalt not lie" "The truth will set you free" and that you can divorce only because of adultery.

BTW, I consider abuse a form of unfaithfulness. Jesus doesn't want anyone abused.

So, the poster, who left, wanted to know if she should tell, right? Well, biblically I don't see how she can NOT tell, that would be the same as lying. Then let her husband decide what he wants and she will just be at his mercy.

Is that sound advice?

[Guest Bro David™]

Well, ok, then, the bible says "Thou shalt not lie"  "The truth will set you free" and that you can divorce only because of adultery.

BTW, I consider abuse a form of unfaithfulness.  Jesus doesn't want anyone abused.

So, the poster, who left, wanted to know if she should tell, right?  Well, biblically I don't see how she can NOT tell, that would be the same as lying.  Then let her husband decide what he wants and she will just be at his mercy.

Is that sound advice?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Sounds like the only thing she should do.

[Orr v'emet]

exception of abusive relationship Orr?

Where do you find THAT in the bible?

Mine says anyone who divorces his wife except for adultery and marries another commits adultery.  Matthew 19:9

So, in my leadership position, I stand on the Word.

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

Honey, we're all human, I don't condemn you or judge you, but I do say, tell your husband, leave him, because he will never get over it and both of you get on with your lives.

He deserves someone he can trust and you have to be big enough to let him be happy.

My husband cheated on me 9 years ago and I still don't trust him, never will, that is that and I wish I'd left a long time ago.

You'll be allright, live and learn.

THat isn't a ooops, that is a determined, conscious effort to screw around on your husband and live with it for almost a year. That's just disgusting and the poor husband deserves better than that.

She should spill the beans and have the car waiting in the driveway as she runs out the door.

Is that standing on the word?

[Gerioke]

Well, ok, then, the bible says "Thou shalt not lie"  "The truth will set you free" and that you can divorce only because of adultery.

BTW, I consider abuse a form of unfaithfulness.  Jesus doesn't want anyone abused.

So, the poster, who left, wanted to know if she should tell, right?  Well, biblically I don't see how she can NOT tell, that would be the same as lying.  Then let her husband decide what he wants and she will just be at his mercy.

Is that sound advice?

<{POST_SNAPBACK}>

more or less

If they love each other they can work it out

jesus didn't say you had to divorce. It's better to forgive.

You want God to forgive you?

How have you been unfaithful to God?