Starise Posted October 26, 2023 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 13 Topic Count: 279 Topics Per Day: 0.21 Content Count: 13,094 Content Per Day: 9.71 Reputation: 13,585 Days Won: 149 Joined: 08/26/2020 Status: Offline Share Posted October 26, 2023 On 10/24/2023 at 3:20 PM, Thewhitedove said: That would be so helpful thank you! My wife said to document everything and leave emotions out of it. This is the approach she uses if she encounters a similar situation. Then if you end up going to management you have more to go on. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
other one Posted October 26, 2023 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 29 Topic Count: 598 Topics Per Day: 0.08 Content Count: 56,188 Content Per Day: 7.56 Reputation: 27,910 Days Won: 271 Joined: 12/29/2003 Status: Offline Share Posted October 26, 2023 17 hours ago, Renskedejonge said: Have you ever taken care of 30 kids alone? I once had a kids party with around 16 kids in a swimming pool. My goodness. One jumped on my neck. He had adhd. He also tried to drown another boy for fun. One kid we forgot. After we had food all of a sudden there was this wet boy who lost everyone, so I got him food. Imagine twice as much kids plus an extra load and then: this must surely be God's will that you go baby her. I'd say: bye bye. no, but my wife has. Was a kindergarten teacher for 20+ years. They had kids that would try and push teachers down stairs. One year a little one's mother was a practicing witch and the little one would bring sacrifice knives to school and put curses on other students and teachers. Go your way if you are not up to it... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
other one Posted October 26, 2023 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 29 Topic Count: 598 Topics Per Day: 0.08 Content Count: 56,188 Content Per Day: 7.56 Reputation: 27,910 Days Won: 271 Joined: 12/29/2003 Status: Offline Share Posted October 26, 2023 18 hours ago, Thewhitedove said: It absolutely crossed my mind! It was my first thought! It's what I've been clinging to and praying about EVERY DAY since I heard we would be put together. Every single day. I was not happy to hear she was my partner but tried to take as Christ like a view as possible, and trued not to listen to anyone who told me not to trust her, that she's a manipulator, lazy, not to be trusted. I bent over backwards helping her and sharing my faith. Bit by bit I started to see a more and more sneaky side. The pressure for me to co standby do not just her work but all of her thinking was starting to get me down. It came to a head yesterday when she literally put small children at risk by not supervising them properly on a trip. I feel like she needs to leave the job for the safety of students and welfare of her colleagues, as well as her own mental health. I feel like she was a fake Christian and just feel like I was drawing under what I thought was God's original plan. I can't carry another person like this. Its becoming such a burden. confront her with the sneaky stuff and let her know that you are not going to cover for laziness. I've been down that road. If she will do what she can help her do it and see if she can do that work on your part to relieve you of that duty. Let her know that Paul taught if you don't work, you don't eat. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thewhitedove Posted November 7, 2023 Group: Advanced Member Followers: 3 Topic Count: 70 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 461 Content Per Day: 0.25 Reputation: 384 Days Won: 1 Joined: 04/14/2019 Status: Offline Author Share Posted November 7, 2023 An update: I confronted my colleague about some of her behaviour and she got very upset and went home. I had no option but to tell our boss what was going on. I now have a virus and have been told by my doctor that I need to stay home for the rest of the week. I am now wondering if God's plan is for her behaviour to be exposed. I feel my illness is in part due to the stress of carrying her. Now I'm not there, colleagues are already texting me to say they've noticed that things are not going well in my absence. I'm just praying that God's will be done in this situation. Thanks for all of the prayers and the advice. 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Starise Posted November 7, 2023 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 13 Topic Count: 279 Topics Per Day: 0.21 Content Count: 13,094 Content Per Day: 9.71 Reputation: 13,585 Days Won: 149 Joined: 08/26/2020 Status: Offline Share Posted November 7, 2023 1 hour ago, Thewhitedove said: An update: I confronted my colleague about some of her behaviour and she got very upset and went home. I had no option but to tell our boss what was going on. I now have a virus and have been told by my doctor that I need to stay home for the rest of the week. I am now wondering if God's plan is for her behaviour to be exposed. I feel my illness is in part due to the stress of carrying her. Now I'm not there, colleagues are already texting me to say they've noticed that things are not going well in my absence. I'm just praying that God's will be done in this situation. Thanks for all of the prayers and the advice. I am sorry to hear you are not feeling well and hope you feel better soon. Teaching is not an easy job on a good day, let alone having this other stuff going on. I will continue to pray for this situation as well as your health. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thewhitedove Posted November 7, 2023 Group: Advanced Member Followers: 3 Topic Count: 70 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 461 Content Per Day: 0.25 Reputation: 384 Days Won: 1 Joined: 04/14/2019 Status: Offline Author Share Posted November 7, 2023 3 hours ago, Starise said: I am sorry to hear you are not feeling well and hope you feel better soon. Teaching is not an easy job on a good day, let alone having this other stuff going on. I will continue to pray for this situation as well as your health. Thank you so much. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thewhitedove Posted November 8, 2023 Group: Advanced Member Followers: 3 Topic Count: 70 Topics Per Day: 0.04 Content Count: 461 Content Per Day: 0.25 Reputation: 384 Days Won: 1 Joined: 04/14/2019 Status: Offline Author Share Posted November 8, 2023 I'm trying to be really prayerful about this issue but I don't know what to pray. Selfishly, I want this colleague to leave, just so I don't have to deal with her. But this woman proclaims to be a Christian so how can I pray against a supposed sister in this way? I've actually been signed off work with stress and I think working with her has had a very detrimental effect on my physical health. I am praying for God's will in this situation but it feels so intangible...I don't know what to hold onto Biblically, to focus on. Can someone give me some pointers to just trust in the Lord and what to do while I'm waiting? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FJK Posted November 8, 2023 Group: Royal Member Followers: 0 Topic Count: 43 Topics Per Day: 0.10 Content Count: 3,349 Content Per Day: 7.77 Reputation: 1,305 Days Won: 1 Joined: 03/01/2023 Status: Offline Share Posted November 8, 2023 25 minutes ago, Thewhitedove said: I'm trying to be really prayerful about this issue but I don't know what to pray. Selfishly, I want this colleague to leave, just so I don't have to deal with her. But this woman proclaims to be a Christian so how can I pray against a supposed sister in this way? I've actually been signed off work with stress and I think working with her has had a very detrimental effect on my physical health. I am praying for God's will in this situation but it feels so intangible...I don't know what to hold onto Biblically, to focus on. Can someone give me some pointers to just trust in the Lord and what to do while I'm waiting? There are only two things you can really pray for, that God do your will, trying to command him as such, or the God's will be done in your own life and that he grant you the power and knowledge to know your role in it and how to carry it out. When you place your problems as being outside your self you cannot solve them, When you realize your problems originate inside yourself, that you have made them through your own choices, you can solve them by changing yourself. You can't change other people, you can only change yourself and everything around you will change accordingly. Pray to God and simply ask what you need to change about yourself with a willingness and a true desire to do it, you will receive an answer. Remember that life is never easy, God told us it wouldn't be way back when we were tossed out of the Garden. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
farouk Posted November 8, 2023 Group: Royal Member Followers: 8 Topic Count: 26 Topics Per Day: 0.05 Content Count: 6,508 Content Per Day: 12.19 Reputation: 3,324 Days Won: 31 Joined: 11/18/2022 Status: Offline Share Posted November 8, 2023 Hi @Thewhitedove Hope you will be well soon. Some good verses: Hebrews 12.2; Philippians 4.8. Good to be able to concentrate one's thoughts beyond one's circumstances. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Starise Posted November 8, 2023 Group: Worthy Ministers Followers: 13 Topic Count: 279 Topics Per Day: 0.21 Content Count: 13,094 Content Per Day: 9.71 Reputation: 13,585 Days Won: 149 Joined: 08/26/2020 Status: Offline Share Posted November 8, 2023 3 hours ago, Thewhitedove said: I'm trying to be really prayerful about this issue but I don't know what to pray. Selfishly, I want this colleague to leave, just so I don't have to deal with her. But this woman proclaims to be a Christian so how can I pray against a supposed sister in this way? I've actually been signed off work with stress and I think working with her has had a very detrimental effect on my physical health. I am praying for God's will in this situation but it feels so intangible...I don't know what to hold onto Biblically, to focus on. Can someone give me some pointers to just trust in the Lord and what to do while I'm waiting? Not sure if this is you. You might be a problem solver and a classic overthinker which means you want to "fix" the problem and will drive yoursellf crazy trying to do so. Don't ask me how I know that haha. Part of the problem can sometimes be the way we approach prayer. If we see prayer as us fixing an issue, I don't believe that's correct. Part of prayer is letting go and letting God. That can be a tough thing to do because we can't put our hands into prayer. It's a complete leaning on Him. I know, easier said than done sometimes. You're right it's a very physically intangible thing, but know that genuine contrite prayer is making things happen in response to the prayer even if we can't see it, and often we can't see it until the prayer is answered. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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