How we treat ourselves

[dgolvach]

Can someone here show me a Biblical passage that instructs us to beat ourselves down everyday or just harbor hatred towards ourself? Is it also wrong to reason with yourself when you are conflicted from within? We confront those who we have conflicts with, why not ourselves? Self talk? example: "maybe I need to not be so hard on myself". " Perhaps all the bad things I have been told about myself (loser, useless, never succeed, not wothy of love ect. Blah Blah) are not so and I need to discontinue these thoughts in my own head that repeat these claims and keep the cycle going. " Maybe God does not require me to have so much self disdain. Could it be that this negative self image is just another trick from the great deciever?

Dan

[nebula]

Well, I learned years ago that I was having a problem "loving my neighbor as I loved myself" because I wasn't loving myself.

I mean, if you don't love yourself, how do you love your neighbor as yourself in a positive way?

[TEXASGRANDMA]

I think sometimes Christians think it is wise to have a bad view of themselves, but God said He made man in His own image. So yes we are sinners and yes compared to God we are vile, but God loves us and He wants us to love ourselves. Like the poster above said we are to love others as ourselves not love others and hate ourselves. The enemy does come and attempts to make us feel worthless. If we feel we are a loser then we are not gonig to be doing God's Work. The devil can make us so discourage that all we want to do is crawl in the bed and stay. But, we must remind ourselves that God left Heaven to die for us. When the devil comes and he will, just tell him that without Jesus I am a loser but when I am covered by the blood of Jesus, I am a child of God and that makes me special.

betty

[Ovedya]

It's called "penance."

Yeah, sure, we don't literally beat ourselves over the back with rods to show God how remorseful we are of our sin, but we do "beat ourselves" in other ways. Listen, we need to hold firm to the truth of God's redemption, and learn to let go of those things which plague us with guilt.

If God has forgiven us then we need to learn to forgive ourselves. Frankly it's a shame to God to bring up past sins that He has already forgiven. It shows that we don't trust in the effectiveness of the Lord's blood! Eseentially we are applying the Lord's blood according to the Old Testament covenant and not the New Testament covenant, which is established with an eternal sacrifice. We are applying the blood that merely covers sins, but the Lord's blood takes away our sins. There is no more sacrifice for sins! The Lord is the eternal sacrifice!

I think that the guilt mechanism is part of the fallen human nature. We have this bizarre obsession with riddling ourselves with guilt and remorse, to the point of mental or physical illness.

You know, last night I took a pregnancy massage class with my wife. The instructor was a professional massage therapist. She tolsd us that some muscle tension in our bodies is due to stress, and even emotional problems - pent up frustrations or the guilt of not forgiving ourselves and others. I think that could be true!

We need to learn to trust the Lord's blood, and pray, "Lord judge me according to your estimation of the Lord's blood." If God judges that the Lord's blood is sufficient to cleanse from sin and render all accounts paid in full, then so should we. We need to learn to let go of past sins and guilt, and stop the penance!

[Pipit]

Can someone here show me a Biblical passage that instructs us to beat ourselves down everyday or just harbor hatred towards ourself? Is it also wrong to reason with yourself when you are conflicted from within? We confront those who we have conflicts with, why not ourselves? Self talk? example: "maybe I need to not be so hard on myself". " Perhaps all the bad things I have been told about myself (loser, useless, never succeed, not wothy of love ect. Blah Blah) are not so and I need to discontinue these thoughts in my own head that repeat these claims and keep the cycle going. " Maybe God does not require me to have so much self disdain. Could it be that this negative self image is just another trick from the great deciever?

Dan

Hey Dan...

Firstly, there is much good advice already posted here... hopefully mine would be fitting enough to add to it, and that all that is said will encourage and challenge you.

Nowhere in the Bible does it say we are to beat ourselves down--either physically, spiritually or emotionally--or to hate ourselves. Nor does it say anywhere we are to love ourselves.

In reading what you have posted, two things come to mind: condemnation (and not just condemnation, but self-condemnation), and legalism.

I am going to venture with some questions: Do you feel that you are more aware of your shortfallings, your sins and inabilities, then you are of God's grace? Do you see yourself as not being good enough to deserve the salvation afforded to you through Christ Jesus?

If so, you are dealing with condemnation. Don't worry, most of us deal with it at one time or another, and unfortunately, some people think it should be a lifestyle. What is condemnation (as an emotional complex)? For us as Christians, it is the feeling that we have failed to live fully in Christ, and because we have failed, that we have seriously ticked off God. More so, we often forget about God's grace, or feel that we cannot accept it or accept forgiveness.

This is not guilt--guilt is different. Guilt is the feeling we get when we have done wrong that informs us that this should be something we repent of and seek grace for. Condemnation doesn't inform us to seek grace, but makes us instead hide from it.

Now, I mention Legalism because often, we feel that we need to do something in order to earn or maintain or make good on the salvation deal. We think that we have to maintain a consistent prayer life, read the Bible daily, learn Hebrew and Greek, and be involved in 5 church ministries in order to be 'Christian.' And when we can't do that, or we miss out on devotional time, or have a bad week, well... we enter into that mindset of condemnation.

So why Condemnation and Legalism? Because both deny or forget about the completeness of Justification that we as Christians have in Christ Jesus! And Justification is something we often say but don't really understand. We think Justification is an ongoing thing, but it isn't. When we accepted Christ, we where Justified--and not just justified, but freely justified, meaning we can't and do not need to do anything to earn it (Romans 3:23-26). It was Christ's work, for us. Condemnation and Legalism also forget that we as Christians undergo sanctification--the ongoing process of being made righteous in Christ, through the work of the Holy Spirit. It is Christ's work, in us.

So, know this: you, if you are a Christian, are Justified--your sins are forgiven, and you do not need to beat yourself up when you mess up or when you feel you have fallen short (but you can fall on your knees and pray for God to strengthen and help you!).

Now, as for all the bad things told about you: If you are a Christian, you are first and formost a Child of God. You are a New Creation, with your old self passed away. You are not a loser (you have Victory in Jesus), you are far from useless (hey, you have a job: You are Christ's ambassador!), you will succeed (you can do all things through Christ who is your strength!), you are loved (for God so loved the world... and if God's love is not enough, I love you as a brother in Christ!) . Those lies are not so, do not place any weight on them!

Dave, place your worth in Christ, and in Christ alone. Know that He has paid for your sins, and that you need not walk in condemnation, nor believe the lies that say you are not worthy.Remember the promises that you as a Christian have in Christ! And remember that there is Grace for those times when you feel less than zero in your Christian walk.

[Work in Progress]

Could it be that this negative self image is just another trick from the great deciever?

It sure is. Perpetuated by many spiritual "leaders". I was raised under a Bob Jones educated "minister" like that (the "sermon" was really just telling you what scum you are and heavy guilt thrown on top) and it harmed me greatly and still does to this day. It is so wrong.

[EricH]

We don't want to have a "bad view" of ourselves. We want to have an accurate view of ourselves. And accurate is described as God's view of us

[dgolvach]

Sometimes I think its easy to confuse self examination and adjusting with self thrashing. The first is productive and helpful but the latter can have a very negative effect on every aspect of your life including your spiritual life. Its very important to build children up and give them praise as much as possible or the little self thrashing tape loop in their mind can plague them for the duration of their lives and this would certainly spill over into their relationship with God.

Dan???????????????????????????????????????????

[Knight of Christ]

Man there is no passage in the bible that says you should hate youre self, if anything it says that you need to love youreself for who you are becouse that is the way that God loves you. "For who you are." both the good and the bad parts

[nebula]

Sometimes I think its easy to confuse self examination and adjusting with self thrashing. The first is productive and helpful but the latter can have a very negative effect on every aspect of your life including your spiritual life.

Bingo!