Whats wrong with me?

[Guest chainer]

I read the bible everyday and learn from it.

I goto a bible study once a week and love it and learn from it.

My barns are full because of the Lord. He rains down blessings on me.

I love the Lord.

Pray to him 3 or 4 times a day every day.

Despite all this I never goto church on a regular basis. It feels like a chore. I go I sit I listen and it is a struggle just to stay awake. I sit in church and just cannot wait for it to be over. Alot of Sundays, like today, I just do not go at all.

I go with no expectations. I do not go to be entertained. I go to worship my father and show him the love and respect he deserves. I am just never moved or inspired to goto church.

I have tried different churches and talked with many minisiters.

I have tried all kind of different approaches.

I am called to teach his word when I am done with school. I think to myself how can I teach his word at church when I myself cannot goto church every Sunday.

What is wrong with me?

[ElijahSK]

I read the bible everyday and learn from it.

I goto a bible study once a week and love it and learn from it.

My barns are full because of the Lord. He rains down blessings on me.

I love the Lord.

Pray to him 3 or 4 times a day every day.

Despite all this I never goto church on a regular basis. It feels like a chore. I go I sit I listen and it is a struggle just to stay awake. I sit in church and just cannot wait for it to be over. Alot of Sundays, like today, I just do not go at all.

I go with no expectations. I do not go to be entertained. I go to worship my father and show him the love and respect he deserves. I am just never moved or inspired to goto church.

I have tried different churches and talked with many minisiters.

I have tried all kind of different approaches.

I am called to teach his word when I am done with school. I think to myself how can I teach his word at church when I myself cannot goto church every Sunday.

What is wrong with me?

chainer,

Not to worry, my brother. This is more likely a sign of something very right with you than something very wrong.

Church was not meant to be somewhere where you go sit and listen. It's suppose to be a place where you bring all that stuff you have been reading at home and learning on your own. You bring it and you let other people learn from what the Lord is showing you. I would excourage you to seek out local house churches. Ones were christians meet in each other's houses. Eating together and fellowshipping. One where you will know everyone's name and they'll know your's. Trust me, once you see it you'll never wonder again why you didn't want to make it to that building every week. I have a tread here called The Church you might like to read (my first post is on like the 3rd page).

I believe (if you are going through the same thing I went through), you are just looking for the church. And the only perfect church is the church that abides by the apostles doctrines and carries on their traditions. Good luck in your search, Let me know if you want more information, scriptures, or have any questions I may be able to help you with.

[buckthesystem]

I don't think there's anything wrong with you. We must each handle life in our own way.

I feel pretty much the same as you. I find going to church to be a "chore" most often too. Mainly because I am the only one in my family who wants to go to church and ridiculed for it (just from my kids, my husband will never do this) before I go and when I come home I get "how was church?" - as if I am supposed to say something profound.

Just about the only interesting part about church I find is the pastor's speech (if he even makes one, sometimes there is too much going on). A lot of the people go for the social aspect, but I don't think I fit in with their idea of what "socialising" is all about (mainly because I have very little money and absolutely no spare time and so cannot go on "camps, and things").

I will go out on a limb here and say I don't like the music (it was mostly "written last week" and consists of the same 3 or 4 lines repeated over and over). If I lived somewhere else I'd go to a "black revival" church as that is the sort of music that I like - instead I can go home and listen to my cds of it providing that nobody else is around as they complain bitterly.

My dream is to find a church where I feel I belong.

I like to hear the pastor talking as he usually has sensible things to say, but it has occurred to me that I may as well get someone to make a video recording of him and play it at home or watch "Shine TV".

Am I being too fussy, and totally insensitive?

[David from New Bern]

I don't think there's anything wrong with you. We must each handle life in our own way.

I feel pretty much the same as you. I find going to church to be a "chore" most often too. Mainly because I am the only one in my family who wants to go to church and ridiculed for it (just from my kids, my husband will never do this) before I go and when I come home I get "how was church?" - as if I am supposed to say something profound.

Just about the only interesting part about church I find is the pastor's speech (if he even makes one, sometimes there is too much going on). A lot of the people go for the social aspect, but I don't think I fit in with their idea of what "socialising" is all about (mainly because I have very little money and absolutely no spare time and so cannot go on "camps, and things").

I will go out on a limb here and say I don't like the music (it was mostly "written last week" and consists of the same 3 or 4 lines repeated over and over). If I lived somewhere else I'd go to a "black revival" church as that is the sort of music that I like - instead I can go home and listen to my cds of it providing that nobody else is around as they complain bitterly.

My dream is to find a church where I feel I belong.

I like to hear the pastor talking as he usually has sensible things to say, but it has occurred to me that I may as well get someone to make a video recording of him and play it at home or watch "Shine TV".

Am I being too fussy, and totally insensitive?

There is a book you need to read, Stop Dating the Church. I have a whole lot I could address or question, but it would be shooting in the dark. I would rather the Holy Spirit who knows you better than you know yourself deal with your intent and bias.

[Dad Ernie]

Greetings Chainer,

You are not alone. I have been in many churches that all I wanted to do is sleep. But with a lot of careful, prayerful effort on your part, you can find a church where you feel you belong. There is a growing community of Home Churches as well in all parts of the world. You may want to try to find one and see if that is more to your liking. They are smaller, more intimate and personal with more participation of the members. There is a good book out on it, but the title escapes me at the moment.

I pray God helps you to find the fellowship where you belong. You need to be the example now for the future sheep you wish to pastor.

Blessings,

Dad Ernie

[Leonard]

Yes, I'm sure the Lord ONLY calls us to what WE WANT, and if it isn't "fun" well then, we ought to forget about it......

[vitality22004]

For starters, there's nothing wrong with you! There's a lot right with you. You sound like your relationship with God is on track, which is the most important thing and what God is really interested in. I want to encourage you if you want to teach Sunday School to persist then in finding a local church that you can minister in. Maybe if you get involved with ministry, it will be easier for you to be in church. If you don't want to be in a church, there are lots of house churches where you can meet people with a passion for God who are doing His will in the marketplace without belonging to a particular church - and that's also ok with God. The benefit of worshipping together with other believers is that in our relationships with each other we learn to grow all the fruit of the Spirit and in the love we display for each other, the beauty of Jesus is truly seen. God Bless.

[nebula]

I've got burned-out with "Churchianity" also.

Church seems to be more of an assembly line program than actual fellowship, training, worship, etc.

You need to change the focus of your prayer from, "Lord, what is wrong with me?" to "Lord, what do you want me to do?"

[wykael]

My experience seems to be similar but different compared with others in this thread. I grew up in a "good Christian" home. We went to church every week. In fact, for 2 years, my parents pastored a small church in a small town. When I got out on my own, I quit going. My arguement was that my relationship was with God. I didn't need all the rules of a church to tell me how to talk to my best friend and mentor (God). So I didn't go. I got married. I had kids. My wife decided we needed to baptize our 2nd child, so we needed to join a church (our first was baptized in a church we didn't belong to). We joined a local congregation. Nice church. Nice pastor. But we didn't go very often. In fact, we almost looked for reasons not to go.

When I found my current congregation, I wasn't looking for a different church. We visited the church my Mom was attending. I guess we were lucky (eg. guided). We felt at home right away. There was no question we were where we belonged that morning. We basically haven't missed a Sunday in 2 years. Do I always enjoy every aspect of the service? No. Of course not. But overall, I leave each Sunday Noon feeling like I at least got something out of it, and maybe contributed a bit as well.

I wouldn't expect that you will find a church in one Sunday like we did. Give them a fair shot. Give them 3 or 4 visits to see how they "feel" to your spirit. Try different denominations. Try independent churches. Try home churches. The important thing is to be with others who are like minded - other believers. Association is important. The world chips away at us every day. We do need that recharge of people who believe as we do. When you are where God wants to use you (or feed you), you'll know it. But persistence pays off. You might not know right away like we did. Keep seeking Him. Keep seeking His will. He'll help you find your place.

The only criteria I would suggest is to make sure what you hear from the stage/pulpit is not popularized Christianity. God hasn't changed his mind on issues in the world, just because His original opinion isn't politically correct. Congregations shouldn't either. Don't let one of the end-times pastors breathe pop-culture into your spirit instead of Christ. If that's what you are hearing, you haven't found the right place yet.

Good luck! And God Bless!

wykael

[dakota190]

i don't know what is wrong with you. i only know what works for me. i have attended many churches that left me cold, bored or confused, distrustful of ministers and the way they ran the churches they were entrusted with by God and how they chose to shepherd or not, the flock that came to them for salvation and encouagement.

i am now attending a wonderful church in knoxville, tn. that inspires, teaches and counsels me, they have befriended me and the congregation is what i have always looked for in a church family. however, i don't sit on my backside and look for them to come to me to be all i want them to be. i go forward and search them out and try to be all the lord would have me be to him and to his church.