Biblical Marriage, Divorce and Remarriage...

[Vickilynn]

What are your views and thoughts about what the Word of God teaches regarding marriage, divorce and remarriage?

Please keep the tone of the discussion civil and respectful.

Shalom,

Thought I'd bump this up.

[Vickilynn]

What are your views and thoughts about what the Word of God teaches regarding marriage, divorce and remarriage?

Please keep the tone of the discussion civil and respectful.

Shalom,

Thought I'd bump this up.

Thanks

I dont think that my disagreeing with you is being uncivil.

There was a bit of name calling going on earlier and Im fairly certain that it what the mod was speaking about.

Simply disagreeing with your and Biblicists view as to what SC is saying is not being uncivil or disrespectful in any way.

I would hope that someone can disagree with some and not have it deemed as being uncivil simply because we fail to agree.

Shalom FoC,

Oh, I'm not saying you're being uncivil with ME. Just a timely reminder as I read over the thread and the tone, that's all.

Of course, we can disagree! That's what we do here!

[Guest LadyC]

perhaps i'm confusing who said what, but i could have sworn that in one of his responses to me, smalclad already addressed the issue and stated that IF one has repented of his divorce, then his remarriage is not adulterous.

[Guest LadyC]

ah yes, he did. posts 53 and 58.

[Guest LadyC]

SUZANNE, sorry it took so long for me to track this down for you... i actually had forgotten. i haven't been able to spend more than a few minutes at a time on here in the last couple of days. but the questions i had asked of you are here, if you'd still be willing to answer them.

this appears to be another "divorce is the unpardonable sin" thread.

when we turn our lives over to Christ, our past is wiped clean. our sins are forgiven. they are remembered no more. i thank God for BLESSING me with my current husband. (although there have been times when it almost felt like a curse instead of a blessing!) bottom line is, GOD brought mark into my life. HE had a purpose for us. the sins of my previous life, including my first marriage/subsequent divorce, has been forgiven, and forgotten. i am so grateful for this grace in which i now stand.

I know that there are many in this day and time who are divorced, but that doesn't mean that we neglect correct teachings for the next generation coming up behind us.

Couldn't you agree that we still need to teach the next generation differently?

In His Love,

Suzanne

suzanne, please help me understand what exactly you're asking. do you mean shouldn't we teach the next generation that divorce is unforgivable, and that under no circumstances can a divorced person who obtained a divorce outside of biblical exceptions ever remarry? should we teach our kids that even if they turn their lives over to God after a divorce, they are still bound forever and ever to their first spouse, and that if they choose to remarry after submitting their lives to God that they will be living in a constant state of adultry? (and pair that with the fact that God says that those who live adulterous lives will never enter heaven...)

absolutely NOT.

or do you mean that we should teach our children and grandchildren how crucial it is that they not enter into marriage lightly, that marriage is a commitment that requires a lot of work, that the emotional "in love" stuff is fleeting and that true love is overcoming trials, that divorce is not an "easy out" and shouldn't be considered an option, unless it falls within the biblical guidelines?

absolutely YES.

FoC, in answer to your question that i find a single verse which states that a person who divorces on biblical grounds commits adultery if they remarry, here ya go. i had previously told you to scroll back through the thread, but you seemed unwilling to do so. in any case, i guess i'm just in a nice mood this morning, so i am providing them again as requested.

matthew 5: 31"It has been said, 'Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.'[f] 32But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery.

matthew 19: 8Jesus replied, "Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning. 9I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits adultery."

mark 10: 5"It was because your hearts were hard that Moses wrote you this law," Jesus replied. 6"But at the beginning of creation God 'made them male and female.'[a] 7'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, 8and the two will become one flesh.'[c] So they are no longer two, but one. 9Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate."

10When they were in the house again, the disciples asked Jesus about this. 11He answered, "Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery against her. 12And if she divorces her husband and marries another man, she commits adultery."

luke 16: 18"Anyone who divorces his wife and marries another woman commits adultery, and the man who marries a divorced woman commits adultery.

and then there is the passage which extends grace to the divorced, and should NOT be discounted by legalism.... the one that puts both you and i in the 'right' when we say that a christian who has been divorced and is remarried is not committing adultery.

how conveniently this passage is forgotten by many who have a legalistic view:

1 cor 7: 27 Art thou bound unto a wife? seek not to be loosed. Art thou loosed from a wife? seek not a wife.

28 But and if thou marry, thou hast not sinned; and if a virgin marry, she hath not sinned. Nevertheless such shall have trouble in the flesh: but I spare you.

hmmm, what does that mean? if a man is married, he should not seek a new wife. if he is divorced, he should not seek a new wife. but AND IF he remarries, he has not sinned, anymore than a virgin marrying for the first time has sinned. therein lies GRACE... that little thing that God is so good at, and that we, as mere mortals, often are not. grace for he who repents. pretty much sums up what i've been saying, doesn't it?

however, and this is a big cautionary red flag to christians who have been divorced and remarry, their life isn't going to be peachy-keen.... but He will spare the person from the condemnation of adultery that would otherwise prevent him from entering heaven.

[Guest LadyC]

ah yes, he did. posts 53 and 58.

Great.

Then Id like to see how this is reconciled, honestly

smaldcald

Certainly remarriage is allowed. But if anybody thinks they can run off and marry someone they were having a filthy adulterous affair with, and not ask for reconciliation from their true husband or wife, and think they are repentant they are living in total denial.

Repentance means you stop doing the sin, if you are sleeping with someone who is not your wife, marrying her does not remove that ONGOING sin.

If they are repentant, then *IF* he stated that before why does this quote above make it seem like its not enough just to repent?

smalclad and i discussed that also. he has a valid point.... is one truly repentant if they divorce the woman he is married to and subsequently marries the woman he was having an affair with while married to his previous wife? it's a VERY good question. and as i pointed out to him, the answer to that question is between the man and God. we can't pass that judgement on him. we'd have good reason to question the sincerity of his repentance, but it's not our place to make that determination. as he later went on and suggested what if this was a pastor who did this, i let him know that his congregation should accept his public apology and assume he was sincere in repenting to God, but that his position in the church should not be restored because such is the earthly consequence of his action.

[Guest LadyC]

FoC, i am reading your posts. most of them anyway. you stated you'd read the whole thread, but you seemingly missed several posts by smalclad, picked a part of it out, and when i brought up that smalclad had already indicated that yes, a divorced person can repent and therefore not commit adultery by remarrying, you yourself said that could be true but that you don't have time to go back through and scrutinize every word of his posts.

so while you may have read the whole thread, you haven't retained everything you've read. and you were quite insistant that i repeat what had already been provided after saying that nobody could provide a single scripture.

anyway, let's respect the request of the mods to keep this discussion civil and not get personal. it's a very long thread, nobody here can keep track of everything that has been stated by the people who've participated.

back on topic, no, it's not a straw man's argument. Jesus Himself makes it clear that a person who is divorced on unbiblical grounds (forgive my typo earlier when i said "biblical" rather than "unbiblical") and then remarries is committing adultery. if it is adulterous the first time they consummate the marriage, it's still adultery the millionth time they consummate it. UNLESS there is repentance.

without repentance, it is ONGOING. that's biblical.

[Vickilynn]

back on topic, no, it's not a straw man's argument. Jesus Himself makes it clear that a person who is divorced on unbiblical grounds (forgive my typo earlier when i said "biblical" rather than "unbiblical") and then remarries is committing adultery. if it is adulterous the first time they consummate the marriage, it's still adultery the millionth time they consummate it. UNLESS there is repentance.

without repentance, it is ONGOING. that's biblical.

Shalom LadyC,

Amen.

FoC, I'm not getting why you are saying ONGOING adultery. If someone remarried without being forgiven of the sin of divorce, the next marriage is adultery. It is not a single act, but as long as the marriage continues, without the sin of divorce AND adultery being repented of and forgiven, it is unrepented and thus ONGOING.

[Vickilynn]

Ok THIS I can live with...BUT...

It is the UNrepentant sin that is the issue here, NOT whether it was remarriage nor aduttery.

Some try to assert that even with repentance that the REmarriage is INHERENTLY a 'state of adultery' and MUST be ended as part of repentance.

THAt is exactly the issue that SC stated earlier that I keep reposting.

Shalom FoC,

Since Smalcald is not here, we can simply go around HIS postings and wait until he gets back to respond. Neither LadyC or myself are trying to answer for him, but simply posting our own views. Please just skip Smalcald until he can reply and deal with those that are here. K?

[Guest LadyC]

Ok THIS I can live with...BUT...

It is the UNrepentant sin that is the issue here, NOT whether it was remarriage nor aduttery.

Some try to assert that even with repentance that the REmarriage is INHERENTLY a 'state of adultery' and MUST be ended as part of repentance.

so are you saying that if a person commits adultery once, and doesn't repent of his divorce, then he only commits (present tense) adultery the first time, and that his sexual intimacy with his new wife is never again considered adultery, even if he doesn't repent?

ya know, i said essentially the same thing that vickilynn did. yet you claim i'm wrong and then turn around and seem to at least partially agree with her.

without repentance, the sin of adultery occurs each and every time the new marriage is consummated... because it IS unrepentant sin.

i can't speak for all people in this thread, but i can speak for myself. i have repeatedly stood my ground that remarriage is NOT inherently a state of adultery if one has repented of the sin they committed in divorcing their first spouse. repentance is the key. and i've provided scripture to defend my position to those who disagree.... a passage which seems to be overlooked by many people.

and for the record, scripture does not allow divorce from the second spouse any more than it does from the first spouse. i don't recall anyone here stating that one who has remarried should commit a second sin of divorce.