I am in need of advice

[Adonaijah]

I recently discovered that my brother is cheating on his girlfriend of whom I am good friends with and her family. This other girl has gotten him into drinking and drugs. My question is should I tell his girlfriend or maybe give him an ultimatum to stop what he's doing and threaten to tell? Any suggestions on what I should do?

[Floatingaxe]

Tell your brother that he ought to come clean immediately or you will speak to his girlfriend for him. She has every right to know. Loyalty to him in his sin doesn't supersede that.

In fact, if he is that out of control of his life, he needs to be advised to break off both relationships, pronto. If he doesn't do it immediately--today---you can do it all for him. He will thank you one day, if you make it understood it is for your love of him that you do these things.

[chicagoburbite]

How old are you, and how old is your brother? If you still live with your parents, it might be time to talk with them (out of love for him), and let them give out a big dose of tough love.

If you are both out of the house, then you should be the one to hand out the tough love and help him set up some new boundries for his life (especially if he's a Christian).

[Leonard]

How do you 'cheat' on a girl friend or boy friend. Until marriage, you have no claim on the other person.

[backontrack]

I recently discovered that my brother is cheating on his girlfriend of whom I am good friends with and her family. This other girl has gotten him into drinking and drugs. My question is should I tell his girlfriend or maybe give him an ultimatum to stop what he's doing and threaten to tell? Any suggestions on what I should do?

If you do not have a relationship with Christ I suggest this is the first thing you must do!

Let Jesus become the Lord of your Life!

Then take this to God and ask him what to do for he is all knowing!

Second, love your brother as yourself or as Christ Loves you and do not condem his activities let Jesus take it from there he is amazing.

Love Jesus

From one of his servants !

[Guest]

How do you 'cheat' on a girl friend or boy friend. Until marriage, you have no claim on the other person.

[Floatingaxe]

How do you 'cheat' on a girl friend or boy friend. Until marriage, you have no claim on the other person.

Yeah! How does one cheat when one is having a pure relationship?

[Adonaijah]

My brother and his girlfriend are not christians I am. About a year ago they made a commitment to each other to remain in a monogomous relationship with each other and when she finished college to get married. He obviously broke his commitment with her and was unfaithful to her and his word. That's what I call cheating. It's the same in anything you give your word in wheather its a relationship or a buisness deal if you don't keep your word then you have betrayed the person you gave your word to.

[Iryssa]

I agree there, Adonaijah. I'm a firm believer in exclusivity while in a serious relationship, married or not. Why? Because if you can't trust him to be monogamous when you're courting, you can't trust him to be monogamous when you're married.

I agree with axey, there: tell your brother to own up and fix it or you'll tell her yourself. I would want to know if my man was cheating on me so that I could get out of there before we were together too long and I was too involved. She has a right to know, and he has a duty to either break it off or keep his promise.

[KeilanS]

How do you 'cheat' on a girl friend or boy friend. Until marriage, you have no claim on the other person.

Leonard, while this is all good and well in theory, in the typical relationship cheating is a very real thing no matter how much it should not be. It also isn't necessarily affected by keeping Christian purity. You don't have to be sleeping together. If I were dating a girl and had been for long enough that we were considered "serious", and then I caught her kissing another guy, I would certainly consider it cheating and be hurt by it.

With that being said, Adonaijah, I think you should confront your brother about it. Even if he is not a Christian, cheating is still obviously wrong. Ask him if he's willing to lose the relationship with his girlfriend over this other girl, and if he says yes, tell him he should break it off with her.