Family Out of Order

[OopsMartin]

The key though is commitment to the Holy marriage and to God, who is the person that we also made promises to when we got married.

For me, yeah I think the bible has laid out some ground rules for how this marital relationship can function the best, but as long as a couple have respect for their marriage and don't divorce, I think as long as they work it out between each other it can work as far as roles go within the marriage.

It seems like when ever we have these discussions we always miss the elephants and go for the nats. The elephant is divorce, the nats are all of the different ways families work together to stay together. I see many families where the man or women are NOT in traditional roles and they are staying together, I see many other families where they have very traditional roles and end up divorced.

But I would like to address something else, and that is our support for the many young people who are indeed practicing their faith and living sexually pure lives. Many young people and young adults are not involved in fornication and I think we should be very open in supporting them in this choice of obedience to God's Word, they are the example for others to follow and we should hold them up as such. Of course part of holding them up is for the married among us to also live sexually pure lives.

Excellent thought Smalcald.

[OopsMartin]

Actually, I'm not really against it as much as you think. What I'm against is no choices, pigeon holing. I do happen to think and have stated that primarily the husband is responsible to provide for and protect the wife and family. That is sticking to exactly what Scripture says, paying attention to the original languages. Did you know that the word "care for" (I think that's the word I'm thinking of) in Greek means nurture; so that the husband is to nurture his wife. So the idea that men aren't nurturers certainly flies in the face of Scripture, eh!

How they work all of that out to look in real life is between husband and wife in particular. But there is nothing wrong at all with the picture you painted. It shows consideration, responsibility, adaptability. Unless I read you wrong.

yeah but we're just looking at the surface of everyday life in a family.

eventually there will come major decisions that can shake a home.

ultimately, IF IT IS A MATURE CHRISTIAN MAN, then he makes the ultimate decision.

He makes sound decisions based on his walk.

I'm not talking about selfish decisions but decisions that affect family as a whole.

we can expect blessings if both see eye to eye and accept whats there.

As I've stated elsewhere, I've no problem with a couple deciding that for them it works out best if the husband makes the big decisions. It really depends upon the two people, their personalities and skills and how they work effectively together. Some women are just as mature and skilled at making sound, fair, good decisions as men are or should be. Frankly I'd rather marry a woman now (in my aged years) who is just as skilled as myself. Two mature, skilled minds are so very often much better than one. And when we don't see eye to eye, then we either choose to yield to the one it affects most or we go to God together in prayer. To my thinking, it cannot get much better than that.

What I question is the idea that it has to be the man. Who says? God doesn't. It is not addressed in Scripture. And frankly we have no business creating a tradition as required that is not in Scripture. Does us no good.

[exrockstar]

What I question is the idea that it has to be the man. Who says? God doesn't. It is not addressed in Scripture. And frankly we have no business creating a tradition as required that is not in Scripture. Does us no good.

that's where the problem is. it is not that it has "to be a man."

this is about a man who is the child of God.

This world is full of men. Not all men are children of God.

The same way you pray and rely on faith that things will be accomplished...there is a family looking

at the man to make sound decisions. through faith they believe blessings will come.

Proverbs says:

"8 My son, hear the instruction of thy father, and forsake not the law of thy mother:"

your arguement may say "not all men have the ability to instruct and not all women

have the ability to instill law in children." But i don't worry about all men.

If my parents followed this "format" then I'd grow up to fulfill what is expected as a man who follows God's word.

Your agruement says "the man and woman should do all these things together...." or "that was then and this is now..."

the situation you really have is not between what we are presenting. your arguement is that times have changed and you

feel a different method is required. you may even feel that what's in the bible may not work with your view or relationship.

in the end...youre being vocal about personal experience and challenging scripture. youre even saying that this is a tradition. Chrisitanity

is a relationship with God. The stronger the relationship the more blessings one recieves. Both male and female approach this

through faith.

[OopsMartin]

What I question is the idea that it has to be the man. Who says? God doesn't. It is not addressed in Scripture. And frankly we have no business creating a tradition as required that is not in Scripture. Does us no good.

that's where the problem is. it is not that it has "to be a man."

this is about a man who is the child of God.

This world is full of men. Not all men are children of God.

The same way you pray and rely on faith that things will be accomplished...there is a family looking

at the man to make sound decisions. through faith they believe blessings will come.

Proverbs says:

"8 My son, hear the instruction of thy father, and forsake not the law of thy mother:"

your arguement may say "not all men have the ability to instruct and not all women

have the ability to instill law in children." But i don't worry about all men.

If my parents followed this "format" then I'd grow up to fulfill what is expected as a man who follows God's word.

Your agruement says "the man and woman should do all these things together...." or "that was then and this is now..."

the situation you really have is not between what we are presenting. your arguement is that times have changed and you

feel a different method is required. you may even feel that what's in the bible may not work with your view or relationship.

in the end...youre being vocal about personal experience and challenging scripture. youre even saying that this is a tradition. Chrisitanity

is a relationship with God. The stronger the relationship the more blessings one recieves. Both male and female approach this

through faith.

Nope that is not what I'm saying at all. I am disappointed that you did not get what I was saying, but not surprised. All of my conclusions have come from years (37+) of Bible Study. Not that I have all the answers, but I come from researching, not from personal experience. But I do share personal experience. And I do look at the world and what it's done. And yes, there is so very much that is tradition and culture not built on Scripture, that we assume is Biblical but is not.

At any rate, keep up the good work ex. I know you mean well.

[inhistime]

K.D. says:

1 Cor. 11:3

Edited July 18, 2007 by inhistime

[Openly Curious]

You are correct exrockstar mommy and daddy didn't show them the way is alot of the problem. Most of the young people today haven't got even a clue what marriage is all about. It takes the roles of mommy and daddy to show them and teach them in the word by way of education and by way of being the example before them.

OC

besides ive never said women should stay at home or any mumbo jumbo like that.

if i was married and my wife wanted to work then I would say OK.

But if we have kids then we would have to evaluate together what is best for the children.

forget my pride and forget her pride...it's now about the kids.

My objective as a man is to make sure my family is stable while at the same time I wash my wife

with the Word (which means i shouldnt neglect my studies) and we instill it in our children.

My wife shows affection while i display strength.

My wife recognizes the way i display my strength in the family.

in turn I acknowledge the love she shows me and, most importantly, our children.

I thank her by making sure she has everything she needs.

She is keeping the family together.

You have a good head on your shoulder exrockstar and you would make a wonderful husband and father I'm sure to some nice woman. The word is simple.

OC

[exrockstar]

You have a good head on your shoulder exrockstar and you would make a wonderful husband

and father I'm sure to some nice woman. The word is simple.

OC

thanks. actually it wasnt til this year that i felt ready to start looking for a wifey.

At the end, it's all in God's hands.

[Kansasdad]

1 Cor. 11:3

[Openly Curious]

K.D. says:

1 Cor. 11:3

[Openly Curious]

1 Cor. 11:3