Alright...I'll just admit it...

[ALionessinGod'sPride]

I have anger issues. I have pride issues. I don't like to back down from things, I have prejudices...namely against atheists...and I appologize to any of you atheists out there but it's true...

I seem to be addicted to arguing and fighting...even though I know it's unchrist-like.

I'm a Christian, but I havn't always lived up to the moral standards that I should...

It's easier for me to succomb to my anger and not let sleeping dogs lie. I feel like backing down just makes me weaker, I can't stand being wrong and I feel like I'm always wrong no matter what I do.

I've been on a rollercoaster ride with my faith, I can't seem to sit down and read the Bible.

I'm saved, but so many people think I'm not because of my anger and pride issues...

I have a hard time sitting down and praying....I get so easily destracted...

And the thing is, I think I just like being angry. I like hating and arguing.

But like anything else, it's a very unhealthy addiction that tears me apart.

I'm also very obsessive, controlling, I can't stand authority figures as I feel like they're always out to just boss me around and control me...

I even have a huge problem with the whole "wives must submit to their husbands thing" and nothing has worked.

I can't seem to just let it go and let God work in my life.

What can I do? I've tried praying and putting honest and earnist faith into God.

I'm not making up excuses because it's the God Honest truth.

I hate evolution so much that I cannot stand Monkeys because they seem to represent evolution to me.

The thing is, I think I just have this block in my mind where I can't let things go, I can't stop being angry and arguementive...it's almost like a thrill for me...

And then I go through periods where I'm depressed, hate myself, and want to die.

Not to mention I'm fearful of ceasing to exist.

What should I do? I have faith, yet I feel like it's not enough. I've tried councelling, but they said nothing was wrong with me.

What is wrong with me? I wish I knew what...what should I do? I feel like I've tried everything, INCLUDING turning to Jesus!

I wanted to find a good place to fellowship...but even then I can't help but jump on people's cases until I feel the problem is resolved rather than letting it go and letting THAT be the resolve when I feel the whole thing is just incomplete...

All I'm asking is for some God-guided help and advice here...even if someone were to agree to sit down and read the scriptures with me...and help explain them to me...that would be fine. Whatever someone would feel would help me out.

I'll take any advice at this point.

[Matthitjah]

Grace to you dear one,

Know what I would do?

Just breathe, just sit back and realize that He is God and that He is in control.

Ps

[Iryssa]

I'm afraid I wouldn't make much of a mentor, but I do have a couple words of advice:

Always take steps, even if they're just baby steps: Instead of trying to force yourself to sit through a 30-minute power-reading session with your Bible, maybe start with just a couple verses a day. If you check your e-mail regularly, you might consider getting a quick Bible Study delivered to your e-mail account daily. You can get one here (select "Bible Study 101"). As you learn more and the verses you read become a part of you, it will gradually become easier. It won't happen overnight, but keep at it, and you can step it up gradually as you feel you are able to. Just keep taking those steps.

Same thing with prayer: don't make yourself frustrated by jumping into an hour a night. You could, for instance, make it your goal to simply say "God, my Provider, thanks for giving me lunch to eat" whenever you sit down for lunch. You can do it in your head. Also, be honest with God: it's okay to tell Him things like, "I don't know what to pray, I'm just FRUSTRATED. God, help me."

Give yourself something to repeat to yourself when you feel like you're getting mad. Pick a verse (something easy, maybe like this one: "Turn from evil and do good; seek peace and pursue it." Ps. 34:14). Keep it on a piece of paper, on the back of your hand, or memorize it. Just make sure it's handy.

Anyway...I'm no expert on the subject (really, I'm not an expert at anything but wasting time on the computer ), but I really, genuinely hope those things help. Praying for you.

[Afal]

I wish that I had some pearls of wisdom to share with you in order to help you in your struggle. Sadly, I haven't other than to say that the advice from both Matthitjah and Iryssa sounds spot on to me.

God bless you

[patricia1]

I wish that I had some pearls of wisdom to share with you in order to help you in your struggle. Sadly, I haven't other than to say that the advice from both Matthitjah and Iryssa sound spot on to me.

God bless you

Peter and Paul use to argue all the time. Paul refusedto go on missions. You have passion as well. Do not listen to those who condemn you. My opinion is that sometimes because men cannot express fear due to the masculinity thing. But it comes out in fear...and it showed when peter denied Jesus three time. Oh...How awful for Peter who loved Jesus dearly but yet later on Peters shadow healed the ill. You cannot force your growth. Jesus made sure He came personally to comfort peter. Jesus knew the torment he was in. Peter was not even with the others. he was alone by the fire thinking perhaps? Throughout the word of God there are many great men of God who were angry. So Please You gave your Life to Jesus and you walk the path he wants you to walk....as for pride...who doesn' have it. your accusers sound a little prideful in their self-righteous judgement of you. Keep that to your self. But you got such wonderful wise advice above me. And Dear cry. there is nothing wrong with crying. One of my favorite books is The tale of Three kings. It is easy reading, short and more like parable. you will be fine.

[InternalFlame]

I know how you feel - I have some of the same problems and fears.

It's a pain in the butt but it's true, we all will almost always have obstacles to overcome. I think the biggest issue is trust for me, and maybe you. It's hard to put your trust in God because you can't see him or touch him and humans are very visual and touchy-feely creatures. Anger is often a byproduct of lack of trust and so is depression and fear. So trust is the key. Especially with the fear of ceasing to exist - trust me, I know how that is. I used to have panic attacks over it. Trust can heal those fears and negative emotions; and once we give ourselves over to God then things start to fall into place.

Maybe you like to get angry because of the fact that it is an intense emotion and you feel that it's the only way you can feel a LOT of something at once. Perhaps the answer is to replace anger in that need for intense emotion with love for God. Easier said than done, I know. Just throwing it out there though.

Like always the best answer is prayer and hard work, and I will pray for you. Hopefully we can both find our way through our obstacles and become better Christians in the process...

[Guest]

Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.

Psalms 46:10

[Scarletprayers]

I question the validity of a therapist who told you nothing was wrong if you were as upfront and honest with him/her as you have been with us?

[Carol R]

Hi,

Again I agree you have been given some very good advice here.

I just want to share a sctripture that was a great help to me as a young christian i prayed it every day lots of times.

Hope it helps you.

Rom 8:1 There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh, but after the Spirit.

Blessings.

Carol R

[ALionessinGod'sPride]

I just wanted to say thank you all of you for your help and advice. I feel that it'll help, and I should allow my relationship with God to grow one step at a time. Sometimes, it takes a long time but I love the lord and I know that in time my relationship with him will grow stronger.

Again, I thank you for your help and advice. May God bless you all.