People Don't really care

[justjen33]

Taylor,

I was right were you are just a few short months ago. I was so lonely and to a point of desperation. I was so tired of being alone. I have two small kids and yet felt alone and was so discouraged because all I felt was that I had failed miserablly because I wasn't married and in a home with a yard and a dog and all was perfect. Then I started seeking God. Really seeking Him. He revealed to me that I was complete and that at this time in my life a relationship would only add to a plate that was already full. He (God) wanted all my attention I could give to Him so that I could grow and become a strong Christian woman. This singleness is a gift. Once I marry I will have even less time to get to know my Creator.

What feels like isolation right now to you may actually be God trying to get your complete attention right now.

I was also without a church home for quite some time. I attended several area churches and none fit. Until I walked into one I had been in five years earlier for a food basket. I knew when I walked back in I was home. This church is 40 miles from my home in another state.

Don't give up hope and don't let what you don't have keep you from hearing what God has in mind for you. One thing that kept resonatting in me was to "be still and know I am God" that played over and over in my head for months. finally I listened.

I am still single and probably will be for quite awhile. But I am happy, joyful and content. I know that I have all I NEED. That did not happen till I gave EVERYTHING over to HIM. I pray you find your path that God has in mind for you and that you find contentment in your heart.

Jennifer

[enoob57]

Taylor,

I was right were you are just a few short months ago. I was so lonely and to a point of desperation. I was so tired of being alone. I have two small kids and yet felt alone and was so discouraged because all I felt was that I had failed miserablly because I wasn't married and in a home with a yard and a dog and all was perfect. Then I started seeking God. Really seeking Him. He revealed to me that I was complete and that at this time in my life a relationship would only add to a plate that was already full. He (God) wanted all my attention I could give to Him so that I could grow and become a strong Christian woman. This singleness is a gift. Once I marry I will have even less time to get to know my Creator.

1 Co 7:32-35

32 But I want you to be without care. He who is unmarried cares for the things of the Lord — how he may please the Lord. 33 But he who is married cares about the things of the world — how he may please his wife. 34 There is a difference between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman cares about the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit. But she who is married cares about the things of the world — how she may please her husband. 35 And this I say for your own profit, not that I may put a leash on you, but for what is proper, and that you may serve the Lord without distraction.

NKJV

What feels like isolation right now to you may actually be God trying to get your complete attention right now.

I was also without a church home for quite some time. I attended several area churches and none fit. Until I walked into one I had been in five years earlier for a food basket. I knew when I walked back in I was home. This church is 40 miles from my home in another state.

Don't give up hope and don't let what you don't have keep you from hearing what God has in mind for you. One thing that kept resonatting in me was to "be still and know I am God" that played over and over in my head for months. finally I listened.

I am still single and probably will be for quite awhile. But I am happy, joyful and content. I know that I have all I NEED. That did not happen till I gave EVERYTHING over to HIM. I pray you find your path that God has in mind for you and that you find contentment in your heart.

Jennifer

Praise God for witness of His Truth... Love, Steven

[AnOrangeCat]

I hear you on this, Taylor. I have been and still am in a highly undesirable situation. There's a lot of solitude in that. I tried reaching out to local churches for help or just someone to talk to and didn't get anywhere. It was really disappointing. But that's where you keep trying. I wouldn't have found this place if I hadn't been desperate and frustrated with the lack of local support. I still don't get to come here often, but when I do it's been an excellent place for prayer and moral support and occasionally offer some of my own.

[ears]

Sounds like you've ran into some unfortunate people lately. Unfortunate because they didn't take the opportunity to greet a Brother with Love. Our Lord can certainly understand how that makes us feel, he was often treated in like manner. Sometimes that's just our cross to bear. When I am left feeling this way by someone or a group, I have learned to immediately connect with my Lord. His companion ship is so comforting . God Bless you Brother, it may feel like it but your not the only one that feels like this.

[Sweetly Broken]

Hello Taylor. I'm a little late on a reply. I hope you've worked out your struggles. I don't have any wonderful words to add to the great advice already given here except to apologize on behalf of those who haven't spoken to you at church. It's not that they don't care. They are afraid. I'm very afraid to walk up to someone I don't know and try to hold a conversation. At times when I have I've received cutting words back such as, "I've been coming here for months!" or "If you really were glad to meet me you would remember you introduced yourself to me a few weeks ago already." Or "If you cared to meet me you would remember my name and you've forgotten my name haven't you?" Of coarse I have. I can't keep my own kids names straight. Words like that just cause us to shy away from attempting to start a conversation with others. Please forgive them, they are Gods children too.

Take care. Keep seeking Him.

Edited February 3, 2012 by Sweetly Broken

[Zemke]

Most of the church in America and the west is going apostate so I wouldn't get to discouraged or disapointed, it's just what's happening. But God always has a remnant. Good Bible loving disciples are out there and will disciple you as you turn to disciple others.

Keep looking for good church and it may only be a small group, the Lord can have you alone for a set time for His purpose but will never keep you there. Treasure this time and when you find some believers loving the Word, treasure them.

And women, forget it, if the Lord ain't in it, it will ruin your life. Gods timing is not our timing. So many miserable people today. The Lord will teach you to be alone but not lonely. Big difference. If He has a mate for you then I would start praying for her right now. It would prepare you both.

[Guest AndrewCothran]

I don't mean this to sound luke a poor me type of thing, but I do have some things I need to say.

Why are people so unloving? I have been alone for 10 years now. I am only 30. I am supposed to be happy with a good job, loving family, and Christian Brothers around. I have NONE of it. I have tried more dates than I can count. I used to go to church, but people were more interested in mingling with friends than welcoming a stranger into fellowship. I can sit in a pew alone or stand in the back of the church the entire time without a single word being spoken to me. I obviously have stopped going to church. I am better off without that " type " of Christianity. I also have dated Christian women who ONLY cared about looks or money. The heart didn't matter. Even pastors didn't give me the time of day when I sought their help. They were always too busy to help a brother, or my problems were not important enough for their schedule.

I don't expect unbelievers to show love and compassion, but such things should never be among those who call themselves Christians. We are called to step out of our comfort zones to others. REMEMBER, Jesus didn't just sit down and wait for people to show up. He went out and sought the people wherever they might be. We need to change church. We are to be a light to the world, but I am looking and I see no lights.

People Do care taylor ..Yes people are selfish and sometimes care only about themselves but this isn't always the case .

I have been abused and neglected a great deal in my life and i am bitterly angry because of it ..so i feel your pain and i understand it ..

[freeinnocentspirit]

I don't mean this to sound luke a poor me type of thing, but I do have some things I need to say.

Why are people so unloving? I have been alone for 10 years now. I am only 30. I am supposed to be happy with a good job, loving family, and Christian Brothers around. I have NONE of it. I have tried more dates than I can count. I used to go to church, but people were more interested in mingling with friends than welcoming a stranger into fellowship. I can sit in a pew alone or stand in the back of the church the entire time without a single word being spoken to me. I obviously have stopped going to church. I am better off without that " type " of Christianity. I also have dated Christian women who ONLY cared about looks or money. The heart didn't matter. Even pastors didn't give me the time of day when I sought their help. They were always too busy to help a brother, or my problems were not important enough for their schedule.

I don't expect unbelievers to show love and compassion, but such things should never be among those who call themselves Christians. We are called to step out of our comfort zones to others. REMEMBER, Jesus didn't just sit down and wait for people to show up. He went out and sought the people wherever they might be. We need to change church. We are to be a light to the world, but I am looking and I see no lights.

I have read so many posts on different board where Christians say this.

There are many reasons people are as they are. Some are naturally loner types, while others

are outgoing. Some are selfish while others are giving.

A pastor once said don't worry about finding the 'right' person. Concentrate on being the 'right' person - Spiritually. We are preparing to be with our Lord and we should prepare self accordingly. I know this is not what you want to hear, and is not entirely what you want, but there is wisdom in what he said.

When we get where we need to be in Christ, He gives us our needs - as He sees them, and even the desires of our heart.

Psalm 37

4 (H)Delight yourself in the LORD;

And He will (I)give you the desires of your heart.

5 (J)Commit your way to the LORD,

Trust also in Him, and He will do it.

http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Psalm%2037&version=KJV;NASB;NKJV

Some of us do not come across well in social situations, so a suggestion here, if this is your problem. Do some volunteer work. Working with people helps us make our self more readily

to others.

Loneliness is not a problem with just singles. It is often in married couples as well. I used to feel lonely all the time. Once I agreed with God that Jesus is my Savior and was indwelt with the Holy Spirit I never feel alone any more. I realize this is not the same as being lonely, as my husband was in the Military for many years and was deployed often. Not having him in the house with me made it seem rather empty, so I spent time with the kids at their home often.

This is a great lesson in the fact that things do not satisfy our needs. Often we strive for things and become collectors, but those come in as poor seconds compared to people. I do believe this is why the great commandment is to love.

I pray that whatever God sees as your current need be met in accordance with His grace, mercy and comfort to you, for Christ's sake.

Joi, Perfectly said to the point.

No one ever ever takes into consideration that throughout a person's life your bound to have periods of loneliness. I am single and although I have spent a lot of time in the past three years studying my spiritual lineage and trying to understand how and why I became a natural recluse. I got sick and hospitalized and it was this forced period of isolation that I think my mind switched off and then I began to have a series of lets say non-religious epiphany's.

I realized one thing at the point of being blessed that you cant let other people bad behavior or issues get you down. Don't dwell on it either.

I trust in God, that every bad thing that has happened to me in my life is due to a higher purpose and I had to learn something there is a reason people go through loneliness periods and remember things will change! Look at the situation as an individual - take religion out of the picture most humans cant show a stranger compassion. Its a society thing.

Edited February 18, 2012 by freeinnocentspirit

[gdemoss]

I don't mean this to sound luke a poor me type of thing, but I do have some things I need to say.

Why are people so unloving? I have been alone for 10 years now. I am only 30. I am supposed to be happy with a good job, loving family, and Christian Brothers around. I have NONE of it. I have tried more dates than I can count. I used to go to church, but people were more interested in mingling with friends than welcoming a stranger into fellowship. I can sit in a pew alone or stand in the back of the church the entire time without a single word being spoken to me. I obviously have stopped going to church. I am better off without that " type " of Christianity. I also have dated Christian women who ONLY cared about looks or money. The heart didn't matter. Even pastors didn't give me the time of day when I sought their help. They were always too busy to help a brother, or my problems were not important enough for their schedule.

I don't expect unbelievers to show love and compassion, but such things should never be among those who call themselves Christians. We are called to step out of our comfort zones to others. REMEMBER, Jesus didn't just sit down and wait for people to show up. He went out and sought the people wherever they might be. We need to change church. We are to be a light to the world, but I am looking and I see no lights.

This dose of reality will hit many Christians in our era. You are finding out that the bible is true! We live in perilous times as Paul warned were coming. He was speaking about the church when he wrote all those things about men being lovers of their own selves etc. The love of many will grow cold because iniquity (the reason Jesus rejects his own followers) will abound. God doesn't send the Antichrist to rule the world because he is happy with what is going on in the church. Of the seven churches mentioned in revelation only one is told they will be able to escape the coming wrath of God.

I encourage you to set your eyes upon Jesus. Emulate him in every way you can through the manifestation of the spirit in your life while keeping your eyes on the true prize of the kingdom. The new earth is the goal. This life is to be accepted as tainted with sin. That sin still affects those in the church. Some outright chasing after it while others succoming through fear and ignorance. We need to be strong in the anointing that we have received and strengthen those who are weak, educate them who are ignorant and cast out those who are lascivious in their ways.

Jesus is the way, the truth and the life. There are three parts to our becoming like him, we travel the way while consuming the truth and living the life. Please don't give up hope, I pray that God will give you your own personal Johnathan as he gave to David who's love was better than that of women.

Gary

[Guest Blazin]

I don't mean this to sound luke a poor me type of thing, but I do have some things I need to say.

Why are people so unloving? I have been alone for 10 years now. I am only 30. I am supposed to be happy with a good job, loving family, and Christian Brothers around. I have NONE of it. I have tried more dates than I can count. I used to go to church, but people were more interested in mingling with friends than welcoming a stranger into fellowship. I can sit in a pew alone or stand in the back of the church the entire time without a single word being spoken to me. I obviously have stopped going to church. I am better off without that " type " of Christianity. I also have dated Christian women who ONLY cared about looks or money. The heart didn't matter. Even pastors didn't give me the time of day when I sought their help. They were always too busy to help a brother, or my problems were not important enough for their schedule.

I don't expect unbelievers to show love and compassion, but such things should never be among those who call themselves Christians. We are called to step out of our comfort zones to others. REMEMBER, Jesus didn't just sit down and wait for people to show up. He went out and sought the people wherever they might be. We need to change church. We are to be a light to the world, but I am looking and I see no lights.

This dose of reality will hit many Christians in our era. You are finding out that the bible is true! We live in perilous times as Paul warned were coming. He was speaking about the church when he wrote all those things about men being lovers of their own selves etc. The love of many will grow cold because iniquity (the reason Jesus rejects his own followers) will abound. God doesn't send the Antichrist to rule the world because he is happy with what is going on in the church. Of the seven churches mentioned in revelation only one is told they will be able to escape the coming wrath of God.

I encourage you to set your eyes upon Jesus. Emulate him in every way you can through the manifestation of the spirit in your life while keeping your eyes on the true prize of the kingdom. The new earth is the goal. This life is to be accepted as tainted with sin. That sin still affects those in the church. Some outright chasing after it while others succoming through fear and ignorance. We need to be strong in the anointing that we have received and strengthen those who are weak, educate them who are ignorant and cast out those who are lascivious in their ways.

Jesus is the way, the truth and the life. There are three parts to our becoming like him, we travel the way while consuming the truth and living the life. Please don't give up hope, I pray that God will give you your own personal Johnathan as he gave to David who's love was better than that of women.

Gary

WOW!!! I have been so blessed to read all of the posts in this thread and want to add my own little encouragement to you, Taylor. I know how you feel. I myself have felt it and have learned for the many past years of feeling it that yes, just like Gary said, you ARE learning that what the Bible says is very true. But the love in your heart has not grown cold.... and the love in Gary's heart has not grown cold..... and the love in my heart has not grown cold.....so like someone before me said: there IS a remnant. Do not lose hope. Be to the people Godward. I remember going from one church to the next and just wanted to experience 'family' and caring and love . I was looking for that 'light' or that shine that would indicate to me that HE was there. Small flickers. Disappointments. So much of what everyone in these posts has said is just so true. God sets us apart for a time.... His reasons are not always so clear. Could be for protection, wanting you to go to Him even more.... or like the Word ( that Enoob I think it was wrote) to minister unto Him.... the list goes on. Press into Him even more, Taylor. Give what you seek. Give and give and give.... offer love and BE that light and that salt . Step out and ask God to show you the lonely ones... the ones that dont fit in .... the ones that hurt and are left out. He is so faithful. The Word says that they will know us by our LOVE. Begin to love and care for.... and you will find something wonderful in those places. What a true blessing all of these prior posts are, Taylor. Its true that most people don't really care. They have forgotten HOW to care. But there are some..... who really do.