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[faith.in.action1987]

Please delete this. I can't seem to figure out how

Edited August 6, 2016 by faith.in.action1987
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[other one]

you are partially describing my life 25 years ago.....     if we truly are the same I would say that those other things that you say are coming from you, may well be coming from other places....  I'll just call it the dark side to keep it simple.    Now that you realize that it's not all coming from God, you can start to sort it all out.....   just keep in mind that it may not be you yourself that the other is coming from....   when you realize that something isn't from God, banish it in the name of Jesus.....   that will start to slow down the Chaos...  and you are not alone in what's happening to you

[TehMill]

14 hours ago, faith.in.action1987 said:

I don't even know where to begin.

Usually I'm on the other end of this type of conversation trying to help the one struggling. I keep telling myself that being a Christian doesn't mean that others need to think I always have it ALL together. Or does it? I mean how can we help others or rather, how can others even seek help or advice from someone who is clearly a mess and struggling to believe the very things they always preach? I think my biggest dilemma here is: "How can I reach out to those drowning when I'm barely able to stay above the water myself?

Im Not really sure what happened to me. I felt as though I was finally beginning to hear the Lords voice clearly and even began writing the things I heard. I was convinced I was hearing from the Lord. He told me things I could never even dream. Awesome things, sad things, even sharing his heart with me at times. He told me I had a purpose and revealed what that was. I've given everything to Him  and my entire life is centered around what I believe God wants me to do. Even down to the man I married (who would never have been even my last choice if it were up to me). The things I watch, music I listen to, people I surround myself with all focus on bringing honor and glory to God.... So when I began hearing him (or so I thought) I felt like I finally knew who I was. 

 

But then I realized I was making it all up/ or it was overflow/ or some of it was God and some was me (i don't know what to believe anymore) and ever since then I've slowly slipped into complete internal chaos and it seems like it'll never get better. Now I'm crying all day (which was my day today)... I'm more impatient with my kids then ever before and so exhausted because my baby is up all night teething and my 3 year suddenly likes to wake up at 530am... 

I'm trying desperately to pray myself through it and I feel little respite from this intense internal anguish and warfare. I feel like I don't know who I am anymore. When I had convinced myself to believe those things I was writting, i felt free and peaceful. Why would God allow me to feel that if it wasn't HIM speaking? 

Today, I tried worshipping alone in my room while my kids napped and as soon as the music began all I could do was cry and sobb. The sorrow was so deep. I've wanted more than anything for God to speak to me and now I don't know if I can ever trust what I think I hear....

I feel so lost and so tired of feeling weary. 

"All who are weary and burdened, come to me and I will give you rest." 

I have been praying and praying for strength and I know he sustains me but I feel anything but rest... I feel weighted down and anxious. Doubtful and unbelieving....

 

All I really needed was to get this out and to plead with the REAL prayer warriors,- the ones who  TRULY pray without ceasing and intercede for others, to please mention me in their prayers. 

 

Thank you

Tiara

I am a Pentecostalist, I had no choice, the Holy Ghost fell on me when I prayed to receive the Lord.

Because there was a sharp divide, one moment I was not saved, the next moment I was, I could easily discern the Lord's voice as opposed to my own mind.

If there is a struggle, uncertainty then it is not the Lord, because the faith comes with His word.

 

If you are receiving things on an emotional level it almost certainly not the Lord, the things of the Lord like Joy or sorrow, even love as an experience is just so much on a different level to human emotion, You read the story of the cross....there is no human emotion.

 

What God wants above everything else is that we be totally grounded in His written word, God is never in a rush, never urgent, "quickly do this, or do that at once" He leads us along. If you feel He is speaking to you along certain lines ok, relax

 

He will confirm it

 

He will confirm it through fellowship...share it with brethren, He will certainly confirm it through scripture. Always ask your Pastor, now here is a discipline, I 've seen plenty go astray on that point. For they ask Pastor and then go against him if he doesn't see eye to eye....if he doesn't you have to abide, God will show it to him. People become angry with Pastor and go off in a huff

 

You'll get into trouble with the Lord if you do.

 

What I say is share everything, nothing is secret, God doesn't want to set you up as the "special one"

[TehMill]

Relax, get back to just enjoying the Lord, enjoying scripture...make a deal with the Lord to only speak to you in the scriptures, and confirm everything with fellowship.

[HAZARD]

The devil likes to have us suffer under guilt and doubt, that's the way he works.

When God forgives us our sins, He remembers them no more, in fact He says in the Psalms;

Psalms 103:12, As far as the east is from the west, so far hath he removed our transgressions from us.

[TehMill]

45 minutes ago, HAZARD said:

The devil likes to have us suffer under guilt and doubt, that's the way he works.

When God forgives us our sins, He remembers them no more, in fact He says in the Psalms;

Psalms 103:12, As far as the east is from the west, so far hath he removed our transgressions from us.

Yes sins and mistakes, we have to confess them and get them under the blood...and move on. Some mistakes are like tripping over barbed wire and the darn thing wraps around our feet...not very nice. When I was a kid on a scooter I whizzed down the hill at a rate of knots...great fun, but I ended up in a great patch of nettles. Getting out was not so much fun as getting in.

 

Is it God? does He allow it? I think we get wild and wilful....He is ready with the balm and bandages [or dock weeds] and a hanky to dry our tears....just like mum used to.

[HAZARD]

2 minutes ago, TehMill said:

Yes sins and mistakes, we have to confess them and get them under the blood...and move on. Some mistakes are like tripping over barbed wire and the darn thing wraps around our feet...not very nice. When I was a kid on a scooter I whizzed down the hill at a rate of knots...great fun, but I ended up in a great patch of nettles. Getting out was not so much fun as getting in.

 

Is it God? does He allow it? I think we get wild and wilful....He is ready with the balm and bandages [or dock weeds] and a hanky to dry our tears....just like mum used to.

No God does not allow these things. God is not the author of sin, sickness, disease or accidents. Sin, sickness and disease is caused by our adversary, accidents by our own misjudgements.

[TehMill]

1 minute ago, HAZARD said:

No God does not allow these things. God is not the author of sin, sickness, disease or accidents. Sin, sickness and disease is caused by our adversary, accidents by our own misjudgements.

....or just that we are in a fallen condition....positionally we are made perfect when we are saved, but being perfect in experience is what we have to work at.

[HAZARD]

1 minute ago, TehMill said:

....or just that we are in a fallen condition....positionally we are made perfect when we are saved, but being perfect in experience is what we have to work at.

Its impossible for someone to be fallen and saved at the same time. One is either in a fallen state or condition or one is saved.

[TehMill]

5 minutes ago, HAZARD said:

Its impossible for someone to be fallen and saved at the same time. One is either in a fallen state or condition or one is saved.

I've got news for you...we still make mistakes, but this thread is not about us for us to bicker about preciseness and exactitudes....