Bringing up your past to a boyfriend/girlfriend

[creativemechanic]

oddly enough  i wrote a play in this very thing- the protagonist  Seth finds out that his missionary brother's fiancee was a stripper/ prostitute before they hooked up and he orchestrated him finding out

[4LdKHVCzRDj2]

On 10/21/2017 at 7:19 PM, Yowm said:

How can one trust another if they don't know the other, and how can they know the other unless they ask about the other?

Asking?! I believe asking is not enough, we have to check and make sure if the person is who it claims to be. And you are sure you know such person.

I see it happens a lot, especially with men lying about themselves and get the woman trapped. They marry, and only then she finds the man is actually a wolf and most of the things he said was not true.

 

Then it comes suffering, then divorce; when something worse does not happen.

[Neighbor]

27 minutes ago, creativemechanic said:

oddly enough  i wrote a play in this very thing- the protagonist  Seth finds out that his missionary brother's fiancee was a stripper/ prostitute before they hooked up and he orchestrated him finding out

Well shame on that character in your script! And in your script the two brothers never spoke again?

Anyone that holds up the past of another that has repented is in sin themselves. They have no kindness nor forgiveness in them.

Edited October 24, 2017 by Neighbor

[Neighbor]

On 10/21/2017 at 2:38 PM, missmuffet said:

I have seen this in several posts. A male especially demands to know his girlfriends past. What position should the woman take when a man demands to know who you were in the past or he will go out the door? This can be the case as well with the woman wanting to know a man's past but I don't see it that often.

I think there is some information about a person if you are in a serious relationship with them that is important information.

1. If the person has a past of any jail time or crime.

2. Any STD's

3. Any addictions

Do you think demanding to know every man or woman that person has ever kissed or had a relationship with is necessary? Would it tell you something about that person if they have had multiple intimate affairs? Do you think that a person demanding this information has revealed some work they still need to do in their life? possessive or jealousy?

 

 

 

Going back to the original post: Hey, if the relationship can survive the antenuptial agreement, it will survive most anything. 

[creativemechanic]

20 minutes ago, Neighbor said:

Well shame on that character in your script! And in your script the two brothers never spoke again?

Anyone that holds up the past of another that has repented is in sin themselves. They have no kindness nor forgiveness in them.

nah.he wasnt a christian and hated his brother and used it to get back at him. his revelation breaks them up and he feels bad and ends up  trying to make them reconcile

[exrockstar]

On 10/21/2017 at 1:38 PM, missmuffet said:

I have seen this in several posts. A male especially demands to know his girlfriends past. What position should the woman take when a man demands to know who you were in the past or he will go out the door? This can be the case as well with the woman wanting to know a man's past but I don't see it that often.

I think there is some information about a person if you are in a serious relationship with them that is important information.

1. If the person has a past of any jail time or crime.

2. Any STD's

3. Any addictions

Do you think demanding to know every man or woman that person has ever kissed or had a relationship with is necessary? Would it tell you something about that person if they have had multiple intimate affairs? Do you think that a person demanding this information has revealed some work they still need to do in their life? possessive or jealousy?

 

 

 

I won't answer with scripture - I'm assuming you just want some general answers?

When i was younger I used to want to know how many guys my girl was with. Then I'd find out and it would bother me. Bother me enough to dump them.

As years passed by and girls got dumped I found it best not to ask. I know it was my fault.

 

-Rev

[The_Patriot21]

Short answer..any relationship your serious about yes.

I'll give you a real life example, I met my wife in college. When we were going out, she never told me she had already dated someone at that college-or that he was still attending. 

Long story short when in the room this guy new how to push her buttons and look innocent, he'd crack what appeared on the surface as a joke, but would actually be an insult, but to anyone who didn't understand the history between them no one would be the wiser.

Well one night he cracked a joke, me thinking it was a joke (me and the guy hung out frequently) cracked another joke...and she stormed out of the room. Took me several hours to calm her down and figure out exactly what was going on....

All that could have been avoided if she had just told me she used to date him. It's hard to care and protect her feelings on a sore subject if I don't know about it. I understand why she didn't but it would have saved all of us a lot of heart ache and stress had she done so.

Anyway I don't know if you need to know every gritty bitty detail about the others life...but it's not to much to tell your boyfriend/girlfriend important stuff like trouble with the law, kids, phsycotic exes, etc. Maybe not on the first few dates...but if things start getting serious it might be a good idea.