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spouse vs friends


creativemechanic

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7 minutes ago, Neighbor said:

Well please tolerate my thinking for a moment:

Jesus is NOT my best friend no matter the song lyrics that cheer on that notion. Jesus is deity; Lord, God, and my savior. His willing awesome sacrifice made for me is way  above and beyond friendship. It is reconciliation of that which cannot be reconciled any other way but by His sacrifice,  the payment of sin, my sin in full, so that I may be seen by God the Father, and not be rejected as the vile sinned filled individual that I am. I am washed white as snow, not by a friend, but by; God the Son, Jesus the Christ, God my creator.

My wife is not my friend either, not a best friend, nor a second friend. She is the God given delight of helpmate to me, making my life  joyous and full. That is way more than friendship, way more. 

Thank you for your tolerance.

Jesus can be your best friend.

https://www.intouch.org/read/magazine/daily-devotions/jesus-our-best-friend

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On 10/31/2017 at 11:33 AM, Running Gator said:

The problem here is that everything can be fodder for gossip.  I have seen people gossiped about because they were seen walking down the "beer" aisle at the grocery store.  Recently at a church I used to attend one of the deacons had rumors of a gay tryst due to the amount of time he spends with a male friend.    

This is an impossible situation unless you never leave your house and never have anyone come to your house.   

 

 

It is quite possible Gator, and is practiced  by many. It is an easy discipline to adhere to and become known for also. It is the not allowing an office door to be closed if one has to be working alone alongside a woman, It is not engaging in the water cooler nor lunchroom double entendre wit that often starts up, and instead walking away from it immediately. If conversation is off color, it is off limits-say so!. And if anyone makes any innuendo they are to be challenged directly without hestitation. It is avoiding  deliberately all possible criticism of one's own conduct, for the protection of the woman's reputation in all circumstance that may be used against her.

Really, it's pretty simple stuff. People quickly learn to behave and how to behave. Many just have to be informed of your limits. Make them consistent with all, make them concise and directly known to all. And be prepared to wear the nickname "Dudley Do-Right" among the staff. Yet receive thank you's when you hold a door open, get up when a woman enters a room, etc.

Let it be pondered why you are perhaps different from the run of the mill, let them all discover Jesus in your life standards and efforts. It becomes the easiest testimony a witness for the Gospel of Jesus may give.

Edited by Neighbor
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13 minutes ago, missmuffet said:

Sorry Dear sister, but as I said despite the lyrics of song to the contrary  Jesus is not my friend. He is my creator! Jesus is God, is awesome beyond measure or comparison as a friend might be. His grace, His mercy is beyond any capacity of a friend of any level. Jesus is the Son of God, fully man-fully God, the God-man that manifested as fully man to die the death due all those given to Him by God the Father. He died. He descended. He arose. He ascended and is preparing a place for me today. That is God to be worshipped, not a special play pal, not a doting uncle, nor my kindly old grandpa.

Jesus is the Shepherd, the Good Shepherd that laid down His life for His sheep, and he loses not a one. 

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20 minutes ago, Neighbor said:

Sorry Dear sister, but as I said despite the lyrics of song to the contrary  Jesus is not my friend. He is my creator! Jesus is God, is awesome beyond measure or comparison as a friend might be. His grace, His mercy is beyond any capacity of a friend of any level. Jesus is the Son of God, fully man-fully God, the God-man that manifested as fully man to die the death due all those given to Him by God the Father. He died. He descended. He arose. He ascended and is preparing a place for me today. That is God to be worshipped, not a special play pal, not a doting uncle, nor my kindly old grandpa.

Jesus is the Shepherd, the Good Shepherd that laid down His life for His sheep, and he loses not a one. 

 

Jesus can be my creator and my best friend. He is the best therapist, physician and shepherd. So I disagree with you on that.

Jesus is a friend to sinners and that is all of us.

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1 hour ago, Steve_S said:

I don't think it's all that hard. There is an aspect of reasonableness to all of this that gets thrown out the window when extreme examples are used. 

Do you think that if 50 Christians got together in a room they could decide what was "reasonable" and what was not? 

I have been told on this forum it is wrong to ride in the car with a female not my spouse or immediate family member.   This includes work situations to the point that people would take their own vehicle instead of being alone in a car with a woman.    

I find that outrageous and totally unreasonable.   Yet for some it is totally normal.  

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14 minutes ago, Running Gator said:

Do you think that if 50 Christians got together in a room they could decide what was "reasonable" and what was not? 

I have been told on this forum it is wrong to ride in the car with a female not my spouse or immediate family member.   This includes work situations to the point that people would take their own vehicle instead of being alone in a car with a woman.    

I find that outrageous and totally unreasonable.   Yet for some it is totally normal.  

Being in a car alone with a woman? What is on your heart and your mind? You are giving a woman a ride home because she is stranded. No problem.... unless.........

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Just now, Running Gator said:

Do you think that if 50 Christians got together in a room they could decide what was "reasonable" and what was not? 

I have been told on this forum it is wrong to ride in the car with a female not my spouse or immediate family member.   This includes work situations to the point that people would take their own vehicle instead of being alone in a car with a woman.    

I find that outrageous and totally unreasonable.   Yet for some it is totally normal.  

Your examples from earlier were not along these lines, though, they were extremes.

Quote

I have seen people gossiped about because they were seen walking down the "beer" aisle at the grocery store.

This would be the rough equivalent of someone accusing another person of adultery because they happened to sit in a waiting room at a doctor's office alone with a woman they'd never met for 10 minutes. Of course that would be ridiculous, but there are always people who will find something to pick at, but that's not really what this thread is about.

Your second example about the gay thing, i'm not sure why that's even relevant, but if a married woman were spending several hours alone with a single man (or vice versa), going to his home three nights a week for a few hours at a time, staying the night occasionally, that would obviously not be an image a Christian would want to present.

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7 minutes ago, Davida said:

That's fine Neighbor, whatever you are most comfortable with. Just so people don't reinterpret  me -- I said Jesus is#1 and my spouse is #2. I never specified further. I wouldn't know how to describe my relationship with Jesus as it has a depth and height I don't have with any one else. Jesus is my Lord. Jesus is my all and all. Jesus had been my anchor in a very stormy and dangerous sea.

I will add that Jesus did say " no greater love hath any man than to lay down his life for his friends. "  :)

YOU are SPOT ON RIGHT .   JESUS also said.........HE who loves mother father husband wife MORE than me is not worthy of me.

DAVIDA keep on , keeping ON in the LORD.

let us keep reminding neighbor and others .      

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On 10/31/2017 at 8:33 AM, Running Gator said:

The problem here is that everything can be fodder for gossip.  I have seen people gossiped about because they were seen walking down the "beer" aisle at the grocery store.  Recently at a church I used to attend one of the deacons had rumors of a gay tryst due to the amount of time he spends with a male friend.    

This is an impossible situation unless you never leave your house and never have anyone come to your house.   

 

 

That person needs to take a look at themselves. Do they smoke or drink coffee? All drugs so what is the difference? Have they ever over eaten? gluttony. They are all sins.

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Giving a girl or woman a lift home I don't see a problem with that especially in this day and age with taxis not being registered and I must confess it would only be women that Jane a day I knew 

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